Johanna Lindsey - A Man to Call My Own

he hissed. "Answer me!"

She couldn't answer him yet. He was still untieing her gag. "I'm fine," she was finally able to say, "I think."

"What the hell do you mean, you think?" he demanded, starting to shake her.

"I can't feel my hands, they've been tied up so long."

Some of the tenseness went out of him. He untied her hands, then her feet. It was a wonder she'd been able to push up onto her knees to let them know she was there.

"Do you know who they are?" he asked when she was finally standing on her feet.

"The men who robbed that train I was on. They found out about the painting I did of one of them. They wanted to make sure I didn't make any more."

"But they didn't hurt you?"

"No, not yet. Bilks wanted to. I don't think the others really did. But there was talk of cutting off my hand instead." She shuddered, saying it.

He spared a moment to hug her. "You're fine now."

"I know," she said with a sigh.

"Why they leave you out here?" Leroy asked.

"The owner of the farm didn't want to disturb his wife with whatever they ended up doing to me. They decided to wait until his wife went to bed before any final decision was made, and hid me out here, warning me not to make any noise."

"I'll get you out of here—after I kill those sons of bitches," Chad said. "Wait here."

"No!" She grabbed him back, starting to tremble. "No, don't leave me alone here. Let me go with you."

"Mari, this won't take long—"

"No! Do you have any idea what it was like, listening to those men talk about killing me! If you don't stay with me, I'm leaving on my own. I am not staying here alone, not another minute!"

Leroy chuckled softly to himself. "She's got her gumption back. I can handle these outlaws myself. You go on and get her home."

"There's four of them, Leroy," Chad reminded him.

Leroy grinned. "Child's play. I'm looking forward to busting some heads. Think there might be a reward for this bunch?"

"More'n likely. The railroad usually offers a reward for anyone who's disturbed the progress of one of their trains, to discourage any future activities of that sort."

"Then leave these fellas to me. They might make up for that five hundred you cost me."

Chad rolled his eyes. "They're all yours."

SUCH A HARROWING EXPERIENCE, Marian had wanted to ride straight home, no matter how long it took, not stop to sleep. Chad didn't oblige her. He got her away from the farm and the ensuing violence expected there, but then he found a lone tree to camp under for the rest of the night.

When she complained that she didn't need any rest, his rejoinder had been, "My horse does."

She hadn't considered the horse that had ridden tirelessly for half the day to find her. She was duly repentant and complained no more.

She just couldn't seem to relax. She'd rather know for certain that those men had been rendered harmless, that they wouldn't be riding after her again. Leroy might not manage to capture all of them. Four against one was— well, with Leroy, about an even fight, maybe even slighdy in his favor. She probably could relax—at least about that.

But that she happened to be spending the night out on the Texas plains, alone with Chad Kinkaid, was reason enough not to relax.

"You don't think Leroy was going to kill them all, do you?" she asked him across from the small fire he'd made.

"He probably isn't going to kill any of them," Chad replied. "That'd be too easy, break in on them sleeping, blast them all with a shotgun. Takes more skill to capture outlaws and bring them in alive, and Leroy prides himself on being skilled. 'Sides, he won't take a chance that the reward is dependent on their being alive."

She still couldn't believe that he had come to rescue her. With all the men there at the party, Chad didn't need to volunteer for the chore.

"Is anyone else looking for me?"

"No one else knows except my pa, and probably Red by now," he said.

"Ahh, so your father sent you to find me."

"No, I let him know what was happening."

"But how did you know?"

"I noticed you heading to the stable. I got curious is all, since nothing was going on down there at the time. One of them got the jump on me and knocked me out. Leroy found me a bit later, and we figured it out together.

There was no time to gather a posse."

She nodded. She should have known his reason for coming wasn't entirely to do with her. He would have come no matter who had been abducted, because that's the kind of man he was.

She sat huddled in a tight ball, arms wrapped around her legs, chin resting on her knees. He'd fed her a few strips of dried beef, hardly a satisfying meal, but it had to suffice. He'd already apologized for not coming prepared, since he hadn't planned on going anywhere before he had a chance to restock his supplies. The two blankets he had wouldn't do to cover them both, unless they were going to sleep directly on the ground. An unappealing thought. And the fire was only a few twigs and wouldn't last through the night, so they would need some cover.

She'd been talking to get her mind off of shivering. It wasn't really cold, only a little chilly. But she was still wearing her sleeveless party dress, and a delayed reaction to having been abducted was probably setting in, too. She couldn't stop her teeth from chattering.

Chad finally heard the noise, and said, "Come here."

"Why?"

He gave her an impatient look. "We need a few hours' sleep so we can get an early start. We've got one blanket to lie on, one for cover, and it's going to get colder before the sun rises."

Huddle together to exchange body heat. That's what he was suggesting. But she was afraid to get that close to him. It had been difficult enough, riding double with him on the horse. And even if her senses could handle it, it was still highly improper. He belonged to her sister—well, he would soon.

"It's nothing personal," he added. "Just good sense."

Put that way she'd be silly to object. Was he cold, too? Probably not. He was just being generous in offering her his warmth.

She moved over to his side of the little fire and lay down next to him, stiff as a board. She heard his sigh before he dragged her closer, full against his side. His arm became her pillow. One of his hands covered one of hers, which she'd hesitantly placed on his chest. Warmth seeped into it and soon into her. She actually fell asleep.

And the dreams started, nightmares, reliving her capture, the fear, watching John Bilks sharpening an axe, meeting the farmer's wife. The woman turned out to be a witch in the dream, and the leader of the gang. She wanted both of Marian's hands chopped off.

Marian sat up with a start, a gasp, and severe trembling. The gasp must have awakened Chad.

"What is it?" he asked, sitting up beside her. Then, "Never mind, I can guess."

He wrapped his arms around her and dragged her almost into his lap. He proceeded to rub her shoulders and her back, but the trembling wouldn't stop.

"I won't let anyone hurt you, Mari," he said soothingly. "I swear, you're safe now."

"I know," she replied.

"It was just a dream. Forget it."

"I'm trying."

But she couldn't stop the shaking. Too much had happened that day and it was all catching up to her. His warmth surrounded her. That should have helped. But it wasn't cold that was making her shake. It wasn't him either. The fear she'd felt earlier had come back with the dream and it wouldn't leave now.

He continued to rub her gently, trying to soothe her, but it wasn't working. And then she heard, "Ah, hell," just before he kissed her.

That worked. There was no room for fear in her mind when it was filled with him. She had a feeling that was his intention, just to distract her. But like that day in the stable, her passion rose with amazing speed. So did his. His kiss might have started as another form of soothing, but there was soon nothing soothing about it.

His lips parted hers, pulling her into the intimacy he offered. She had craved the taste and smell of him without realizing it, but her body knew and was thrilled beyond measure. He placed her down on the blanket, was still kissing her deeply, leaning over her now, one leg thrown over her hips. He filled his hand with her breast, uncoiling the heat deep within her. She couldn't think, didn't want to think. She held him tightly, her only fear now that he'd come to his senses and stop.

He didn't. If anything, his kiss became more intense, as if he also had a fear that she might stop him at any moment. She should. She knew that, deep down, that she really should, but every time the thought tried to surface, she pushed it away. And his hand continued to roam, over her hips, down her legs. Even with the skirt and petticoat in the way, his touch enthralled her.

But his hand found her bare skin beneath the skirt, dragged it with him as he retraced his path, and stopped at the junction of her legs. Her pulse was racing with expectancy, the coil of heat unwinding even more. And then he touched her where she thought he might, and within moments that amazing pleasure burst on her that he'd given her once before. She was incredulous. He'd only had to touch her ...

Did he know what he'd done? She wasn't sure, but his kiss was gentle again as he smoothed her skirt back down and pulled her back toward him to sleep. Her pulse quieted. Lethargy stole over her. She slept like a baby.

MARIAN WOULD SWEAR SHE woke up blushing. The memory of what had happened last night was immediately in her mind. Cheeks flaming, she tried not to look at Chad, who was getting his horse ready for riding.

He must have noticed the blush, though, because after a few minutes he said, "Look, you were in shock last night. I tried to help, but I'm afraid I got a little carried away. I know you'd probably rather not talk about it, but I'm sorry, Mari."

She didn't know whether to be grateful or disappointed. But he was right, discussing what happened between them would be much too embarrassing. Carried away? She should have known that's all it had been—for him.

They rode hard to reach the ranch by midmorning, only to find out that Kathleen and Amanda hadn't returned yet. They probably thought that Chad would be bringing Marian back to Stuart's place after he found her. He left to let her aunt know that she was home, and Kathleen rode in late that afternoon-without Amanda.

Marian didn't remark on her missing sister—well, Kathleen didn't give her much chance to, she was so full of questions, wanting to hear everything that had happened to her. And she assumed that with Spencer's having taken his carriage back to town again, Amanda was just waiting at Stuart's for Kathleen to send the wagon back for her.

But once she finished her own story, Kathleen began hers. "Your sister took advantage of the commotion caused by your disappearance to sneak off with Spencer without anyone's noticing."

"Sneak off with him? For how long?"

"She's still gone."

Marian's eyes widened. "Overnight? Where would they have gone?"

"To town to get hitched is my guess. I thought at first she might have talked him into bringing her home here, for whatever reason, but the carriage tracks point to town. I'll ride in tomorrow with some of the boys to let her know she's got my blessing."

Marian decided to join her aunt for the trip to town. She still wanted to buy some painting supplies, and she supposed it would be appropriate to congratulate her sister on her marriage. She wasn't all that surprised that Amanda had dumped Chad for Spencer. She had preferred Spencer from the start, his being the more debonair and citified of the two. She could have just said so, diough, instead of eloping.

They were in for another surprise, though, when they got to town the next day. Gossip was already running rampant that Amanda had spent the night in the saloon—without benefit of marriage. Marian couldn't imagine what her sister was diinking of, but she was too sore after the ride to find out immediately and elected to rest at the hotel while Kathleen got to the bottom of what was going on.

Chad caught up to Red before she reached the saloon. He'd come to town himself just to make sure he was off the hook. After hearing that Amanda had eloped with Spencer, he wanted to verify it, so he could relax again. He'd been crushed, though, to find out they hadn't married after all. Apparently, they'd intended to but had postponed the ceremony because of an argument, and they hadn't made up yet. But Amanda had spent the night in the saloon, whether in Spencer's bed or not didn't make much difference.