Rose stomped on the roach she saw scurry out from behind the toilet. Tomorrow she would call around for another place to stay.“Rose?” Ronnie’s voice startled her. She had not expected to deal with her lover so quickly. Grabbing her cane, she walked across the stained carpet and stood behind the door, pressing her forehead against the cool metal.


“Go away, Ronnie,” she said softly.


“Rose, please let me in. We need to talk.”


“Please go home. I’m fine.”


“You’re not fine. If you were fine you’d be home with me.” The doorknob jiggled, showing the executive’s frustration with talking through the steel door. “Sweetheart, please just let me in so we can talk.”


“There’s nothing to say, Ronnie. Go home. You don’t have to worry. I won’t sue you or anything.”


“Sue?” The doorknob jiggled again. “Rose, let me in. I’m not worried about you suing me. Come on, Honey. We need to talk.”


“So talk. I can hear you.” Rose knew she could not open the door. She was on the verge of tears as it was and seeing Ronnie would be more than enough to push her over the edge. “What did you want to say?”


A long silence. “I wanted to say I love you. That I want you to come home with me and talk about this. Please Rose, I’m sorry I lied to you.”


“Sorry you lied or sorry I found out?” She closed her eyes. “Please…just go home, Ronnie.”


“I can’t leave without you.”


Rose slapped her hand against the door. “You…you were my knight in shining armor, you know. I really thought you had come down and rescued me like a real life Cinderella.” She did not bother wiping the tears that ran down her face. “And all this time you were just trying to protect yourself. What a fool I was.”


“No…Rose, you don’t understand.”


“What don’t I understand? You hit me, lied about it, made me think that everything you were doing was out of the goodness of your heart, then you let me fall in love with you.” Rose lashed out, slamming the side of her fist against the door. “Damn you, Ronnie. Damn you. Why did you let me fall in love with you?” The sobs refused to be held back and she collapsed to the floor.

“Please go away Ronnie. There’s nothing left to say.” She hugged her knees against her chest and cried.


“Rose, please.” The young woman refused to answer, even when the request was repeated several times. Eventually Ronnie walked away, her footsteps against the creaking wood drawing even more pain from the young woman’s heart. Rose threw herself on the threadbare blankets that covered the bed and cried herself into a restless sleep.



* * *

Susan walked into the outer office to find her secretary sitting at Rose’s desk. “How is she?” she asked.


“She hasn’t come out of her office all day,” Margaret replied.


“Are you still holding all of her calls?”


“Except…”


“I know,” Susan waved her hand dismissively. “Maria or Rose, right?” She shook her head and headed for Ronnie’s office. Margaret jumped up immediately.


“Ms. Cartwright, I don’t think she wants to see anyone.”


“Oh no, Margaret. She wants to see someone. It just isn’t me.” With that, she reached for the door handle.


“I don’t…” Ronnie began, stopping when she saw who it was. “Susan, I’m very busy.”


“Busy doing what? Hiding in your office and working yourself to exhaustion?” She closed the door and stood in front of her sister’s desk. “Ronnie, you can’t keep this up.”


“Don’t start playing mother hen with me. I’m not in the mood.”


“And what do you plan to do? Stay in this depression? Have you looked in a mirror lately?”


The strain had taken its toll on Ronnie. Dark circles under her eyes were a testament to the lack of sleep. Her cheeks were drawn, her hair given only the barest of care. The sullen woman had taken to spending the night in her office, finding an empty home too much to bear. Susan recognized her sister’s outfit as one kept in the office closet for emergencies.


“Come to my house for dinner tonight, Ronnie,” she urged. “You know Jack and the kids would love to see you.”


“No. I have things to attend to here.”


“No word from Rose yet?”


“She left the Barcade a week ago and checked into the Maverick. Traded in one dive for another.” Ronnie rubbed her face with her hands. “She must have left instructions with the front desk not to let any calls through. They keep taking messages but she won’t return my calls.” Susan nodded, having already known those facts thanks to frequent phone calls to Maria.


“Have you been over to try and talk to her again?”


“What’s the point?” Ronnie sighed. “I did that twice and she wouldn’t even open the door for me.” She buried her head in her hands. “She just keeps telling me to go away.”


“Sis, I hate to say this but maybe you should consider moving on.”


Ronnie lifted her head and gave her sister a look of total desperation. “I can’t, Susan. Don’t you understand that she’s everything to me?” A tear rolled down her cheek. “I need her like I need air or water. I feel so empty without her.” She turned her head away, angrily wiping away the tears that seemed to form so easily during the past week. “What’s all this worth?”


“Hmm?” Susan didn’t understand the question.


“What’s all this worth?” She gestured at the reports and papers on her desk. “What are gains and ratios and profits worth if there’s nothing to show for it? What’s the precious Cartwright reputation and status worth if the one woman I need most in my life won’t even speak to me?”


“Ronnie, you’re talking crazy now. You know as well as I do this business has to survive and make money.”


“For what? So we can have a few more zeros in our bank accounts?” She stood up and looked out the window. “It doesn’t mean anything without her.”


“Veronica?” Ronnie wiped her face with her hand before turning to see Beatrice standing in the doorway. “I was downtown doing some shopping and I was hoping you girls would join me for lunch.” She stepped inside and shut the door. “What happened to your friend? I thought she replaced Laura.”


“She left,” Ronnie said without elaboration. “I’m too busy for lunch today, Mother. Maybe Susan can go with you.”


“Well, it’s nothing important I guess.” She sat down on the leather sofa. “So that woman you tried to help left? I could have told you it wouldn’t work.” She looked at her younger daughter.

“Those people don’t understand what hard work is all about. They just want to sit around and collect a check. I suppose she’s filed for unemployment to pick your sister’s pocket some more.”


“Rose isn’t like that, Mother,” Susan defended. “She didn’t quit because she didn’t like to work. There were other reasons.”


“There’s no excuse for leaving a good paying job except pure laziness. It’s in their blood.”


“In whose blood, Mother?” Ronnie snapped. “The poor white trash that you love to talk about?” Her hands gripped the back of her chair, knuckles white with the strain. “I’m sure there are people like that, but Rose isn’t one of them. She’s good and honest and would give her last dime to help another person out.”


“Veronica…” Beatrice’s tone was low, warning.


“No. I’ve had it. You badmouth everyone who isn’t a blueblood like us. Rose has neverdone anything to earn your dislike, yet you treat her like a bastard at a family reunion.” Seething with anger, Ronnie let loose the words that refused to be kept back any longer. “I don’t care what you think, Mother, I love Rose and I won’t have you talking badly about her, do you understand me?”


Susan took a step back, certain that her mother and sister were about to have a royal battle of words. Never had any of them stood up to her mother and now Ronnie had just announced her defiance on the most taboo of subjects. Beatrice stiffened and pursed her lips.


“I thought that issue was settled years ago or have you forgotten your promise to your poor father?” The matriarch now stood in front of Ronnie’s desk, her hands resting on the mahogany top. “You swore to him that you were through with those perverted ideas.”


The strain of losing Rose sapped any tact or restraint Ronnie had left. “You think telling me not to love women would make those feelings go away? It didn’t. You two forced me to promise that no matter how I felt. What is so wrong with loving another woman?”


“Veronica, think about your position for a minute.”


“Fuck my position!” Ronnie shoved away from her chair and took a step forward noting that Susan quickly stepped between them. “Face it, Mother. Your oldest daughter is a lesbian. You can’t change that so you’d better learn to accept it. Rose is my lover and I’ll give up everything I have in order to keep her.” She lowered her voice, the tone deadly serious. “Including my family.”


“Maybe this isn’t the best time to talk about this,” Susan said, trying to guide her older sister away from their mother.


“No Susan,” Beatrice bristled. “It’s obvious your sister has decided to throw away everything her father and I worked for all these years.”


“Why is it so hard for you to accept?” Ronnie shrieked. “It’s my life.”


“Mother, there is no reason why she can’t be that way and still do a good job running the company.”


“Whose side are you on, anyway?” The matriarch turned on her younger daughter. “Don’t tell me that you accept this, that Jack accepts it.”


“It isn’t for us to decide who Ronnie loves, Mother.” Susan took a deep breath and looked at her older sibling. “And yes, Jack and I do accept Rose,” she added.


“I can’t believe this.” She walked over the couch and retrieved her bag. “I would have thought after poor Tommy’s death you would have realized what can happen from hanging out with the wrong element. And just how do you think the shareholders will feel about this?”


“It’s none of the damn shareholder’s business who I’m sleeping with,” Ronnie snapped. “It’s not like they can vote me out of office.”


“You don’t own controlling interest, Veronica. Don’t forget that.”


“Actually, Mother,” Susan interjected. “With Tommy’s shares between us we hold fifty percent of the stock. All we need is Frank, Michael, or John to vote with us and we have controlling interest.”


“So that’s it?” Beatrice’s lips were pursed, her frustration obvious. “Fine. If Veronica wants to throw her life away and you’re willing to help her, so be it. I’ll call a cab from downstairs.” She stormed out of the office, leaving the sisters alone again.


“Well that was productive,” Ronnie sighed as she sank into her chair. “I finally stand up to her and it doesn’t even matter because Rose is gone anyway.”


“You know I’m never going to hear the end of this, don’t you?” Susan said. “I’ll guarantee there’ll be a message on my machine when I get home.”


“I know, Sis. I’m sorry you had to get in the middle of it.” She picked up her pen, the present making her heart ache even more for her beloved Rose.


“Ronnie…do you want me to try and talk to Rose?”


“Do you think it would make any difference? She won’t talk to me.”


“I don’t think it could hurt,” Susan said.


“I’d make a deal with the devil if I thought it would get her to talk to me again.” She looked up at her sister. “Please. If you think there’s anything you can do or say to make her understand how I feel, do it.”


“Which motel is she at?”


“The Maverick on Central. About eight miles west of the Arcadia.”


“That’s almost on the city line of Schenectady, isn’t it? The one that puts out all those gaudy Christmas decorations each year?”


“That’s the place.”


“I’ll go talk to her but you need to tell me what really happened that night. She deserves to know the complete truth, not just whatever those papers she found told her.”