One unforgettable night that had as much to do with her answering the door wearing only stockings and a shirt as it did with her finally starting to open up to him.

But that had all been a lie, he reminded himself, willing his heart to fossilize when it came to her. Telling himself not to linger on the memories of how she seemed to be sharing her fears, and inviting him into her life, because that was all upended when she lied about who he was to that thug on the street.

His fingers tightened on his phone, gripping it harder, as if he were channeling his frustration into the screen. He needed to get into Manhattan as soon as possible, make a pit stop at his boxing gym, and then get his ass to work. That was his plan of attack: the way to rid Julia from his mind. Head down, nose in work, client meetings—the recipe to numb him to the effect of that woman.

He scrolled through Chris’s note, a quick summary of what he was most looking for in his next contract with the TV network that carried his show, and then he read Chris’s previous contract that the host had handled on his own. As you can probably surmise, negotiating on my own behalf is not my expertise. Happy to have you doing it for me going forward, Chris had written.

He replied quickly to Chris, eager to prove his value to his new client. That the guy was marrying Julia’s sister in a month didn’t even factor into his decision. Because he wasn’t thinking about Julia, not as he walked past security, responding to a note, not as he found his driver while answering another email, and certainly not as he slid into the backseat of a town car that would zip him into the city.

Then he saw a new email land in his inbox. From her. The subject line gave nothing away: Hi. But Pavlovian response kicked in, and he opened it before he could think. Because seeing her name still felt like a damn good thing, still held the promise of a sexy note, a naughty line, or a sweet nothing. But more than any of those options, it held the promise of her.

from: purplesnowglobe@gmail.com

to: cnichols@gmail.com

date: April 25, 4:08 AM

subject: Hi

Clay,

Hi. I’m lying awake in bed thinking of last night. How only 24 hours ago you were here with me. How much better it was to sleep with your arms around me, all safe and warm and snug. How much I would love to have you here again. But I know that won’t happen. And I understand. I truly understand. If I were you, I would hate me too. If I were you, I’d be suspicious as hell. And I probably wouldn’t trust me either. So I get 100 percent where you’re coming from and I wish there were another way. I want you in my life so badly that I can feel this ache where you’re supposed to be. But I know I can’t have you, and I’m sorry I can’t be open right now. You deserve more than this. More than me. All I will say is this sucks, and if I could turn back time and do certain things over there’s a lot I would change.

But I wouldn’t change a second with you.

Wow. I just re-read my note. I think that’s the mushiest I’ve ever been with anyone. Damn, you did a number on me, and I’ve got it bad for you. I’m hitting send while I still have the guts in me to do so, even though I will probably regret it. Except this is all true.

Xoxo

Julia

He dropped his head in his hand, and cursed. A wave of frustration and longing rolled through him, and he knew he should turn the damn phone off and ignore her. But this woman, she was under his skin. He hated lies but he’d be lying to himself if he pretended he’d forgotten her in a day.

from: cnichols@gmail.com

to: purplesnowglobe@gmail.com

date: April 25, 7:12 AM

subject: Hi

I don’t hate you. The farthest thing from it.

He hit send before the regret washed over him, as it eventually would, he was sure.

* * *

By the end of the day he wasn’t feeling much. He was riding at the perfect levels of blankness. A day in the trenches had done wonders for him, and a night at the gym would drain him of any residual feelings that threatened to resurface.

The next day he did the same, burying himself in business, making sure every T was crossed and I dotted, that points were won, and clients weren’t just making more money, they were being protected in their business deals. His job was a hell of a lot more than wringing more dollars from networks, studios and producers. It was checking out the fine print, making sure clients were looked out for when it came to two, three, four years down the road in a deal.

His days followed that pattern for the next week, and the regular routine of work, gym, business drinks or dinner, sleep, then rinse, lather, repeat the next day turned Julia into a hazy blur in the rearview mirror. Soon, she’d migrated to the back of his mind, and the fact that she’d been relocated there pleased him immensely. A few more days of supreme focus and she would be a distant blip on the horizon.

At seven-thirty on the dot on a Wednesday night, he left his office and headed for Times Square, threading his way through the crowds of tourists in their I Love NY sweat-shirts and Property of NYFD nylon jackets, with pretzels and hot dogs in hand, as they snapped photos of the neon signs and the famous intersection. He walked past the St. James Theater, tapping once on the poster for Crash the Moon, feeling a surge of pride for that show’s quick success. His friend Davis had directed it, and it had become a smash hit in the first month alone, playing to packed houses every single night.

He crossed the street, dodging a cab stalled in traffic, as he made his way to the bright lights of the Shubert Theater where Liam was playing the Kevin Spacey character in The Usual Suspects. Michele waited outside the theater lobby, smiling when she spotted him, and Clay took some comfort in the reliability of a friend like her. She’d been here through the years, always available for a drink, always willing to chat, or to see a movie or show. She was a good one, steady, dependable, and patently honest. A warm feeling rushed over him with the reminder that there were people you could trust implicitly. She would never dance around the truth.

“Hey you,” she said, waving her fingers, and then giving him a quick kiss on each cheek.

“Are we French now?”

“Of course,” she said playfully. “We’ll grab baguettes and sip espresso after the curtain call.”

“That’d be nice,” he said, as they walked into the theater and he handed two tickets to the usher who led them down the aisle to some of the best seats in the house.

Michele raised an eyebrow. “Impressive.”

“Like this is a surprise? We always get the best seats. Your brother is a Tony-winning director,” Clay said, gesturing for Michele to take her seat.

“I know. And I don’t ever take that for granted. And you,” she said, wrapping her hand around his arm, and leaning in close, “are the man behind the scenes who makes this stuff happen, too.”

He waved off the compliment. He wasn’t in the business for compliments. “Tell me about your day,” he said, and listened as she shared the little details that she could, not breaking any client confidentiality but talking in general terms about her work listening to the woes of others as one of New York’s finest shrinks. Her voice was calming and soothing, so he barely noticed that she’d kept her hand on his forearm the whole time.

When the curtain rose at the start of the play, she stayed like that, palm wrapped around him. A few minutes into the first act, he almost asked her to move her hand, but then it wasn’t really bothering him, and they were old friends. Even if they’d kissed once back in college, it didn’t matter that she was touching him, shifting closer. Her shoulder was brushing his by the time the cast took their bows. She smelled nice, he thought. Some flowery scent to her hair, maybe jasmine? He’d never noticed it before.

“Did you like the play?” he asked as the theater rang with cheers for the actors.

“Loved it.”

“Never gets old, does it? Even when you know it’s coming, the Keyser Soze reveal.”

“It’s a brilliant twist,” she said, agreeing.

“I need to go see Liam.” He gestured to the backstage entrance. “You gonna come along?”

“Of course.”

Once backstage, Liam greeted him with a clap on the back and a hearty hug.

“Nice work. You were better than Spacey,” Clay said.

Liam beamed and pointed his index finger at Clay. “Flattery will get you everywhere.” Then he turned to Michele. “And who is the lovely lady on your arm tonight?”

Michele laughed nervously. “Oh, we’re not together. Just friends,” she said, extending a hand to shake.

Liam’s green eyes twinkled. “All the better for me,” he said, then ran a hand through his mass of dark hair. “Why don’t you come along to The Vitale then for a nightcap? It’s right next to the restaurant I’ll be opening soon.”

Clay wanted to roll his eyes. Could Liam be any more obvious? But Michele seemed to be enjoying it because she answered quickly. “I would love to.”

“I would love to take you.”

Liam was recognized a few times on the street, and again at the bar where he was amiable, and signed a cocktail napkin for a young woman who said she was a theater student at NYU and had always loved his work.

“That’s so nice that she adores you so much,” Michele said to Liam when the woman walked away.

“And I adore signing cocktail napkins,” Liam said, with his trademark grin that made women swoon. “Signed a few in the Bahamas last weekend.”

“How was your vacation there?” Clay asked. “Good times?”

“Amazing. Gorgeous blue skies, perfect weather . . . did some fishing. Oh, and listen to this. Some guy tried to get me to buy real estate there. A damn condo, of all things,” Liam said, tossing his hands up in exasperation. “Do they think I was born yesterday? I know how those things work. It was probably for one of those deals where only one unit is done so they show you that. And then just pictures of the rest.”

“And you want me to advise you on whether this is a good deal or not?” Clay said in a dry tone.

“Oh yeah. Exactly. Please tell me, because my poor little actor brain can’t figure it out,” he said, and the two men laughed.

“Actually,” Michele chimed in, crossing her legs, and sitting up straighter in the bar stool as she kept her eyes locked on Liam. “I’ve heard that a lot of those scams try to prey on celebrities. Because so many celebrities can often make quick decisions with money.”

“I can make quick decisions on other things,” Liam said, waggling his eyebrows at Michele.

“Like what, Liam?” she asked in a soft, sexy voice Clay had rarely heard her use.

Damn, the flirting between the two was stirring up again. “And that’s my cue to go,” Clay said, slapping some money down on the bar. He patted Liam on the shoulder. “Poker tomorrow night?”

“Of course.”

“See you then.”

He started to leave, but Michele followed him to the doorway. “You’re always just taking off,” she said brusquely, crossing her arms.

“Didn’t seem I was necessary around here. You two are hitting it off,” he said with a shrug.

“Are you trying to pawn me off on him?”

“Pawn you off?” he asked as if she’d been speaking a foreign language. “You guys are getting along. I’m making myself scarce so you can keep getting along.”

She heaved a sigh. “How was your trip to San Francisco last week?”

He could have done without the reminder. It took every ounce of will he had to strip his California girl from his brain. “It was fine.”

“Did you ever hear from that woman you were crazy about?”

And his perfect hold on not thinking about Julia slipped through his fingers. One mention, one reminder of how he felt for her, and she came roaring back to the front of his mind. It was like a truck had slammed into his body, the weight and pressure of the memory of the woman he craved. “Michele, if you don’t want to hang with Liam, I don’t care. I’ll tell him I need to take you home. Whatever you need. I’m not trying to pawn you off on him. I thought you were having a nice time with him and I wanted to get out of the way. If I read the signals wrong, I’m sorry.”

“You do a lot of that, don’t you?” she said, looking him fiercely in the eyes like they were locked in a battle to not blink first.

He squinted at her, as if that would help him understand what she was saying. “What do you mean?”