Julie Ortolon - Almost Perfect

They sat in easy silence watching fireflies blink off and on throughout the camp. Lights glowed from the various lodges where the counselors would spend one last night, then depart in the morning. A shriek of laughter drifted from the Chiefs Lodge. Through the screen windows, she could make out the shapes of the coordinators moving about. A pillow flew, hitting the back of someone's head. More laughter followed.

Maddy smiled. "I just realized what this reminds me of."

"What's that?" He draped an arm over her shoulder.

"The last day of college." She leaned comfortably into him. "Classes are over, removing your reason for being there, yet you're still there, along with people who have been such a big part of your life. Then suddenly you realize you have no reason for seeing them every day. Everything inside you ping-pongs back and forth between excitement- because, yippee, you're finally out of school, ready to take on real life-and outbursts of tears because, oh my God, you're not going to see your friends every day anymore."

"Transitions are always tough," he said quietly.

"Yeah." She sighed, grateful that she wasn't leaving with the others tomorrow. She had one whole month to be with Joe before his friend Derrick arrived. Plenty of time for working up to the things she'd promised herself she'd tell him as soon as they had the camp back to themselves. Although there was no time like the present to start laying the groundwork. "It's very tough to say good-bye, but sometimes it's not necessary. If the bonds are strong enough, all those promises to stay close actually stick."

"Do they?" he asked.

"They did for Amy, Christine, and me. Three out of four's not bad."

"What happened to your fourth suitemate?"

"Ah, that would be Jane Redding."

"From the morning show?" He pulled back in surprise.

"Yep."

"You never told me that." He settled back against her, fitting her snugly to his side. "So what happened with her?"

"She went off to become rich and famous, and we fell out of touch." Oh man, she thought. This was not a good way to lead up to asking how he'd feel if she took Sylvia up on the offer to be in the spring catalog. "But it didn't have to be that way. We could have stayed close if Jane had been willing to put in the effort."

"Long-distance relationships are tough." He paused. "I'm, um, not sure I'd want to go through another one."

Why had he said that? she wondered. Oh yes, Janice. The woman he'd dated while still in the Army. The one he'd considered marrying until he realized she valued career over family.

And weren't those all the problems she and Joe would face if she moved her career up on her list of priorities, then had to travel to make it work?

From the Chiefs Lodge, Carol's voice rose above the others, calling for quiet. Maddy glanced over at the sound. The screens obscured the figures inside, but she could see that they were making a toast. Cheap wine, paper cups, and promises.

Which of those promises would hold?

"I've always wondered, is it the same for men when you have to move on?"

He chuckled. "We have our own way of doing it. Generally without the emotional outbursts."

"Really?" She tipped her head to see his face. "What about the last day of Ranger school? I imagine that was pretty emotional."

A smile moved over his face. She loved the way he smiled, his muscles moving in such a masculine way. "It was… intense."

Laughing, she planted a quick kiss on his cheek.

"I'm sure it was."

"Speaking of…" He stared at his beer can. "I heard from Derrick today."

"Oh?" She frowned at his flat tone. "Is something wrong?"

"No. Not at all. Actually, things couldn't be better. He, um, sold a corporate package."

"Really?" Twin jolts of elation and concern hit her at once. How fabulous for Joe-but where did this leave her? "Wow, that's… great."

He chuckled, which made her frown deepen.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing." He took a sip of beer. "I don't have all the details yet, but he's coming earlier than expected so we can start building the obstacle course."

"How much earlier?" She shifted to face him.

"He'll be here in two weeks."

"But-"

"I know." When his arm dropped off her shoulder, he took her hand. "Your art show in Taos. This won't affect that. I promise. I'll just tell Derrick to entertain himself while we're gone."

"Is that what you want to do? We were just talking about the importance of friends, and I know you haven't seen Derrick in nearly two years. I don't want to interfere with that."

"Maddy…" He chuckled. "I'm not going to miss your art show."

"Good." She squeezed his hand. "I really do want you there."

"You know…" he said cautiously, gathering his thoughts and his courage. "I'm a little surprised that you don't have more shows coming up."

"Oh?" Her hand jerked.

"Yeah." An alarm went off in his head. Something was definitely wrong here. "You were such a big hit the night of Sylvia's show, I expected things to take off faster."

"Ah. Well, you know." She shrugged as if that should explain things.

He frowned at her. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing." Irritation edged into her voice.

"Everything is going okay, though, right?"

"Of course." She scowled at her beer.

"It's just that I've noticed you haven't been spending much time on your artwork, so I wondered-"

"Everything's fine. Really." Her eyes pleaded with him in the dark. "Can we please talk about something else?"

Shit! It was worse than he'd thought. Although fortunately the only thing she'd been hiding was her disappointment. He rubbed his thumb over her knuckles. "It's okay, Maddy. Sometimes the things we want take longer than we thought they would. That doesn't mean they won't happen."

"I'm not so sure. Joe, I want-" She hesitated, then gripped his hand tightly. "I've been wanting to tell you for weeks that… I want very much to make this work."

"This?" His mind whirled. What "this" did she mean?

"I want to stay here and… give this time. I don't have to have a huge art career, just something quiet and satisfying. That's enough for me, I swear. I just want… the chance to make this work."

"It will work for you, baby. I'm sure of it." Disappointment swamped him as he realized she was talking about her art, not what was growing between them. An ache of sympathy quickly followed. "And of course you can stay here as long as you need to while you're waiting for things to take off."

He kissed her forehead, his mind racing ahead. "In fact, something just occurred to me. Since Derrick and I got our first account, we're going to need to step up all our plans. You know, set up a bank account, office records, all that stuff. Which means we'll need some staff." He leaned back, beaming at the brilliant simplicity of the idea. "What do you say? Would you be interested in the position of office manager for our boot camp?"

"You mean"-her eyes went wide-"like what Carol does for the summer camp?"

"Exactly! Then you can live here as long as you like-which certainly appeals to me-while you wait for things with Sylvia to work out. And it will happen." He lifted her hand and kissed it. "Never lose faith, Maddy. Promise me that."

She blinked, as if overcome. "I'll try not to."

"Then you'll take the job?"

"I-I…" She smiled up at him. "I'd love to."

One woman's dream is another woman's nightmare, so be careful what you wish for.

– How to Have a Perfect Life

"What have I gotten myself into?" Maddy wondered aloud as she sat at the desk in the camp office. She could be signing prints for Sylvia's catalog, getting ready for trade shows and gallery appearances, working on new originals. Instead, she was sitting before a computer, creating a spreadsheet that was turning into a disaster.

Why had she taken this job?

Not that she had any grounds to complain. She'd made sacrifices to help Nigel with his business. How could she do less for Joe? Joe might not be sick, but if she loved him, she owed him the same level of commitment.

If only she could get this stupid spreadsheet to work!

She dropped her head to the desk in despair, only to have her forehead crack against the keyboard.

Ouch! She raised up, rubbing her brow. Then her eyes widened at her computer screen, which seemed to have gone haywire. All the numbers in all the little boxes were ticking down like the timer on a bomb about to go off. "No! Stop! What'd I hit? Undo, undo!"

She frantically punched keys, until suddenly the numbers reversed, going up now, faster than the national debt. She froze in shock, watching it with horrified fascination.

Up until now, she'd always thought she was good with computers. She'd quickly learned that having an innate ability with graphic design software did not mean she had the same ability with bookkeeping software. Truth was, she made a much better business owner's wife than she did an office manager.

She'd done well helping Nigel run his business all those years because they'd had Betty manning the front desk. All Maddy had to do was carry files back and forth, boost morale, and keep tabs on how things were going. After the past two weeks, she was convinced Betty was the eighth wonder of the world for being able to run an office so smoothly.

Just then she heard Joe's pickup pull into the parking lot. He was back from meeting Derrick at the airport. Panic shot through her. She hit the monitor casing a few times in a desperate effort to stop the wildly growing numbers, then tried punching keys, ESCAPE! DELETE! UNDO!

Two truck doors slammed. Boot heels crunched on gravel.

She jumped out of the chair and onto the desk to block the computer screen with her body just as Joe stepped into the office. A tall, leanly muscled black man came in behind him.

"Hey, baby," Joe said, then frowned in curiosity at where she was sitting. "Is something wrong?"

"No. Not a thing."

Looking skeptical, he gestured to the other man. "Meet Corporal Derrick Harrelson."

"Hello, Derrick." She started to extend a hand in welcome but caught Joe trying to look behind her. She quickly shifted, reclining sideways. "We meet at last."

Derrick's eyebrows shot up, making her realize she was sprawled on the desktop like a lounge singer on a piano. "So you're, um, Maddy." He flashed a smile full of white teeth. "It's good to finally meet you." He sent Joe a look of approval.

Joe frowned at her. "You're sure everything's all right here?"

"Fine." She grinned. "Completely, one hundred percent under control."

"Because if you need help, I can ask Mom to come down and-"

"No!" She plastered her back against the computer screen. "I've got it. Seriously."

"Okay then." He hesitated. "I guess I'll leave you to it while I show Socrates to the Chief's Lodge."

"All right." She wiggled her fingers as they headed out the back door. "Good to meet you, Derrick."

The moment they were out of sight, she jumped back into the chair and looked at the screen.

The numbers had stopped going haywire. Which would have been a relief. Except that now all the little boxes were blank.

Heart racing, she pulled up the e-mail server and shot a post off, praying that at least one of her friends was online.

Message: Help! I'm making a mess and I don't know how to stop!

Amy: Calm down. I'm here. What's the newest bookkeeping disaster?

Christine: I'm here too. Lord, Maddy, when are you going to stop digging this hole deeper and start climbing out?

Amy: Ignore her. Just tell me what's wrong, and I'll try to walk you through it.

Christine: What's wrong is she won't TALK TO JOE!

Maddy: Is there an echo in here? That's all I hear anymore. Talk to Joe. Talk to Joe. Well, I'm sorry, it's not that easy! Especially when I'm messing up his business. I want out of this job so badly I could scream.

Christine: So tell him!

Maddy: What, say "Joe I love you and by the way I quit"? Yeah, that's a great start to becoming a husband/wife team running a business together. No, I have to fix this first. Help him get the camp going. And pray for the day he can afford an office assistant who understands bookkeeping. Maybe by then I'll be married and pregnant and I can quit to raise children.

Christine: I canNOT believe you said that! Another woman, yes, but not independent Maddy. Besides, if you can't say "I love you" you'll never get to say "I do."