Johanna Lindsey - Angel

The color came, bright flames of it across her cheeks. “You’re madder than you look, aren’t you?” she guessed miserably.

“My toe’s still throbbing, lady. I figure you owe me for that.”

Cassie groaned, “Please, I’m a lousy subject to seek revenge on. You saw how unsatisfying the MacKauleys found it. And I never would have stomped on your foot — or done the other — if I’d had time to think about it. But I panicked. I wasn’t thinking clearly. I was afraid—”

“You still are, and it’s starting to annoy me. You had enough gumption to stand up to three large Texans, two of ‘em madder’n hell. I’m just one man.”

“But you’re a killer.”

She really wished she hadn’t said that. It rang out like a death knell, hers, and the silence that followed was excruciating. Cassie felt like she’d actually struck him, when all she’d done was state a fact. But the emotion that gathered in his eyes…

“You think I’d hurt you?”

Truth time. He wasn’t just asking to hear the answer. He was forcing her to hear it, too, and accept it once and for all — and stop acting like a silly goose every time he got close to her. Deep down she’d known the answer. She just hadn’t been listening to her own instincts.

“No, you wouldn’t hurt me — so back off.”

She shoved against him as she said the last, and slipped past him to head for the front door. Her temper was rising by the second as she thought about what he’d just done to her, playing on her fears to get even, then making her aware of it. If she had to say one more word to him…

“Miss Stuart?”

She whipped around, ready to blast him with her now simmering anger, but she was forestalled by his expression, so intense, with his eyes fixed on her mouth.

“I’ll wait a while to collect on that debt.”

Her breath caught in her throat. “I–I thought you just did.”

He shook his head, a slow, unsettling grin forming on his lips, the first of any kind of humor she’d seen out of him, and this she would have preferred not seeing. He didn’t say anything else. He simply sauntered down the side porch and out of her sight.

Cassie went inside the house and closed the door quietly instead of how she’d intended to. It was her heart that was doing the slamming.

“I don’t start fights, but I don’t back down from them, either.”

Cassie wished she weren’t still nervous around Angel. Yesterday they had established that he wasn’t going to hurt her, so this continued unease whenever he got close to her didn’t make much sense. She wasn’t in fear for her life. She wasn’t even in fear for her virtue. That parting threat he’d made yesterday hadn’t held much substance, she’d decided after she’d had time to think about it. After all, she knew her attributes, and attracting handsome men wasn’t one of them — at least men not interested in ranching. And insinuating that he was going to kiss her again to get even, well, the threat of it had obviously been the getting-even part. He wouldn’t actually do it.

But this morning when Angel had insisted on riding out with her to check on the herd, Cassie had gotten all nervous and flustered again. And this time it came out in chattering that had suddenly turned serious when she’d asked him how many men he’d challenged. His reply hadn’t been the answer she’d been looking for. But now that she’d opened the subject, her curiosity wouldn’t let her abandon it.

“They say you’ve killed more than a hundred men,” she pointed out as nonchalantly as she could manage.

“They say a lot of things about me that aren’t true,” he replied.

They were riding side by side. She glanced over at him, but his expression didn’t warn her off. He looked quite indifferent, actually.

“Have you kept count?” she asked.

He met her eyes for a moment, and she could have sworn there was a spark of humor in them as he replied, “I hate to disillusion you, but the number isn’t so high I can’t keep track of it.”

He obviously wasn’t going to share that figure with her. “Were they all fair fights?”

“Depends on how you define fair. I’ve killed a few who didn’t see it coming. But then, I have no qualms about shooting a man who’s got a rope waiting for him somewhere. I’ll give him the same chance the hangman does— none.”

“You don’t call that murder?”

“I call it roundabout justice. You think these low-life bastards give their victims a chance when they rape, rob, and kill ‘em?”

He was no longer indifferent to the subject. In fact, there was enough heat in that statement to make Cassie wish she’d left well enough alone. So she was appalled to hear herself ask, “How many is a few?”

“Three.”

“And the reasons?”

“One tried to hire me to shoot his partner in the back. Figured if he paid to have it done, he wouldn’t be accountable. I don’t see it that way. His partner wouldn’t have, either. But I would have turned that one over to the sheriff if he hadn’t made the mistake of telling me the local lawman was on his payroll.”

Which was nothing she hadn’t heard of before. Caully’s own sheriff was more or less in Dorothy Catlin’s pocket, since he happened to be her nephew. But then, last term the sheriff had been one of the MacKauleys’ cousins.

“So nothing would have happened to that man,” Cassie guessed.

“Nothing at all, and the partner, who happened to be a decent, honest man, would have been murdered some night just because he’d gone into business with the wrong man. I didn’t feel like letting that happen.”

Cassie wondered if she could have made such a decision. Thank God she’d never had to. “And the other two?”

He stopped suddenly. When she noticed, she pulled up and had to twist around to look at him. He was leaning forward against the saddle horn, staring straight at her, his face more shadowed at that distance.

And he stared for a number of tense seconds before he asked, “You sure you want to know?”

Put that way, in that tone of voice, she knew she ought to say no. But she’d latched onto this notion that the more she knew about Angel, the less frightening he’d be. So far it wasn’t working, yet her meddling instincts wouldn’t let her quit. Still, she couldn’t quite get the word out, so she had to nod her answer.

He set his horse to motion until they were riding side by side again. He wouldn’t look at her as he spoke. “A couple of years ago I happened upon this man forcing himself on a farm girl. It looked like he might have dragged her out of the field she was working. You could see her farm in the distance with the fields running right up to this river I was following to the next town. He had her on the opposite bank, far enough up behind the trees that I wouldn’t have noticed if I hadn’t heard her screaming.

“By the time I crossed the river and came up behind them, he was almost finished with her. She’d been beaten, probably for resisting him. Still, for all I knew, they could have been married, though I just can’t stomach a man who’d treat his wife that way. So I suggested he leave the girl alone. He suggested I get lost — in some pretty colorful terms. Then I noticed the young boy who looked enough like the girl to be her kin. He’d apparently tried to help her, and he was lying not too far away with a knife stuck in his belly for his trouble. He was already dead.”

Cassie swallowed hard before she said, “So you shot him.” It was no question.

“I shot him.”

“Good,” she said so quietly he didn’t hear.

“But the girl was beyond caring. She never did stop screaming. And the second I shoved that bastard off her, she up and run into the river. I went in after her, but the water deepened not too far downriver, and she slipped under it. By the time I pulled her out, she was dead — and I felt like going back and shooting that bastard again.”

Cassie tried pushing the event from her mind. It was a tragedy a couple of years old— which she’d just forced him to relive. Some levity was called for to break the somber mood that tale had left, but she wasn’t all that adept at lightening moods. Getting folks annoyed with her was her forte.

But she owed it to him to try, so she said, “I hope you didn’t save the worst for last.”

He actually laughed. “Figured that one would have shut you up.”

She cast him a suspicious look. “Was that the truth you just told me?”

“The shortened version — unless you want to hear about her folks’ reaction. Those two children were all they had. They blamed me for not saving the girl.”

“But you tried!”

“They weren’t interested in hearing that.”

No, they wouldn’t be, but then, grief was a strange emotion, affecting each person differently. And Angel didn’t sound bitter about it. He’d probably seen a great deal of grief in his career — possibly some that he’d caused himself.

He suddenly added, “I never told anyone about that girl and her brother.”

Cassie was surprised, but his confession also caused a warm feeling akin to pleasure that was more than just feeling privileged that he’d shared the story with her. It flustered her enough that she said, “Then would you like to share the last account with me?”

She’d left herself open to a flat-out no, but instead he remarked, “You really do like to meddle, don’t you?” She blushed, but he didn’t wait for her response. “It don’t make no never mind to me. The third time happened only last month. The rumor was that this fellow by the name of Dryden married rich old widows for their money, then killed them off. He was making a career out of it.”

“You actually killed a man based on a rumor?”

He ignored the shock in her expression, going on in the same conversational tone. “There were a lot of folks who knew about it, just no way to prove it after the fact. You really think I’d kill someone because of a rumor?”

The blush was back worse than before. Truth time again. “No, you wouldn’t.”

“No, I wouldn’t — though it sure made it easier to pull that trigger, knowing about all those widows who died before their time. But I shot Dryden because he’d just handed over a woman, an English duchess, to a bunch of cutthroats, and he knew full well they were going to murder her. She happened to be a friend of Colt Thunder’s, and he asked me to join up with this outlaw bunch who was hunting her, so I’d be there to help her out if she needed it. Turned out she needed it. If I hadn’t shot him, Dryden would have lit out of there with his blood money, and I didn’t want to take the chance that I might not find him again.”

“Did you save the Englishwoman?”

“She was still alive last I saw. Keeping her that way is Colt’s problem now.”

“I’d forgotten that you know him, and Jessie and Chase Summers as well. They’re my neighbors, you know.”

“I know.”

His tone was slightly resigned, as if he wished it were otherwise. She looked at him curiously, but he was staring out at the sagebrush-dotted plain, so she decided she’d be better off not pursuing that thought.

“I’m surprised to hear Colt has made friends with a white woman. If I hadn’t known him before — well, before the Callan incident, he wouldn’t give me the time of day now.”

Anyone who knew Colt Thunder knew about that time several years ago when he’d been whipped nearly to death because he’d dared to court a white woman. The girl’s father had taken exception to it when he’d found out Colt was half Cheyenne Indian. But Colt had never looked at white women the same after that, at least those he wasn’t already acquainted with. The rest he treated like the plague.

“Maybe the term ‘friend’ was a mite too generous,” Angel allowed. “That duchess had somehow corralled Colt into escorting her up to Wyoming, so he’s stuck with her for the time being. I didn’t say he liked it. Fact is, he don’t like it one little bit.”

That sounded more in line with what she knew about Colt Thunder, so her thoughts went back to what Angel had confessed about his third “unfair” killing. “You knew you were going to save that Englishwoman, or at least try to, so how do you justify killing Dryden?”

That had him stopping again, and again she had to twist around to look at him. “Lady, he didn’t know I wasn’t part of that bunch that had promised him five thousand to hand her over. As far as he knew, he was bringing her to us to die, and let me tell you something, the plans they had for her didn’t include a clean, easy death. Besides, I call it as I see it. If a man’s doing something that would earn him a rope, it don’t bother me to save the hangman the trouble. So if you think I regret killing that bastard, think again. It was a pure pleasure. But what the hell should I expect? She called it cold-blooded murder, too, even though she’d be dead now if I hadn’t been there. So you think I give a good damn what the hell you call it?”