Beth Ciotta - Anything but Love

Rae waited. And waited. After what seemed like a lifetime she lifted a brow. “What? What’s the thing, Luke?”

“I don’t know.”

She blinked at him.

“I don’t know, dammit.” He keyed the ignition and adjusted the heat. “You blindsided me with this baby news. I need to wrap my mind around it.”

“No surprise there. No problem. Take your time and get back to me when you have a handle on your … thoughts.” The mention of the baby rattled her. She’d been in business mode all day, and she had this pending meeting with Rocky. She wanted to get it over with, wanted to know where she stood with the club. She did not want to be focused on the fact that she was pregnant with Rocky’s niece or nephew. Things were awkward enough. “My appointment?” Rae prompted.

“Right.” He shifted into reverse. “Where am I taking you?”

“Daisy’s house. I mean your sister’s house. I want to talk to her about the Cupcake Lovers.”

“Care to fill me in on how you think you can help them with their book deal?”

“Sure.”

“Really?”

“You look shocked. It’s not a secret.”

“Maybe not, but you have to admit you’re not the most forthcoming person in the world.”

“Guilty as charged.” Rae settled her purse in her lap and focused through the windshield as Luke pulled out of the snow-drifted lot and onto the plowed road. He’d offered a little something about himself. Maybe she should do the same. He was, after all, the father of her child. Even though they’d known each other for a year, they barely knew each other at all.

“Here’s the thing,” she said, borrowing Luke’s phrase. “I’m guarded. I’ve been guarded for a very long time. Because of my background, the life I’ve led, the people I’ve dealt with … I don’t trust easily. I’m not big on sharing my feelings because they usually end up getting trampled. I’m not fond of sharing personal information or even general opinions because they almost always end up twisted or manipulated or in the tabloids. That’s my story and it’s not likely to change anytime soon.”

She waited for him to jump all over that. You’re pulling the poor-little-rich-girl card?

He glanced over. “You’re also the most complicated woman I’ve ever met.” His eyes sparked with something she couldn’t quite discern. Curiosity? Wariness? “Sam came to see me.”

Hello, mental whiplash. “And?”

“He’s still hot for you, Rae. You have to tell him you’re off-limits.”

Luke’s revelation was unsettling on two levels. Rae addressed the latter. “Why?”

“Because you are. Because you’re pregnant. With my baby.”

“I know my situation, Luke.”

“He’s my cousin for chrissake.”

“Is that why you’re upset? Because Sam’s family? What if Adam asked me out? Or any other guy in town—local or transient? I’m a free agent, Luke. Just like you. Just because we hooked up—”

“If you say, it was just sex—”

“Well wasn’t it?” Rae worked hard to keep her heart out of her eyes as she met Luke’s gaze. She couldn’t deny to herself that she was infatuated with Luke, even though he’d been a jerk back in Bel Air, but she wasn’t about to admit her tender feelings, unless.… Was it possible he felt something, too?

Luke dragged a hand down his face then focused back on the road. “Getting back to Sam. Don’t you think it’s unfair to give him false hope? Thinking he might have a future with you, only to learn a month down the line that you’re pregnant with another man’s baby? My baby?”

Rae wasn’t altogether sure why Luke’s observation ticked her off. He was right about Sam. Not that she intended to lead the man on. “For what it’s worth, I told Sam I’m not interested in an intimate relationship. He promised he wouldn’t press the issue.”

“He doesn’t have to press. He’s patient.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It’s his secret weapon. Patience.”

Rae rolled her eyes. Luke made it sound as though Sam was a crafty Casanova. A game player. The man was, in fact, a straight shooter. Calculated seduction wasn’t his style.

Luke on the other hand … Luke Monroe was the biggest flirt in town. He loved women and women loved him. He had a long history of maintaining simultaneous casual sexual relationships. No doubt he had a playbook of various seductions. Rae was beginning to rethink her willingness to permanently relocate to Sugar Creek. She’d been thinking about how much she loved the area, the people. She’d been thinking this would be a nice place to raise her child and that her child deserved to know the love of her/his father.

She hadn’t been thinking about what it would feel like watching Luke carrying on as always with his revolving girlfriends.

Rae’s temples throbbed. She was fatigued. She was hungry. And she was more than a little frustrated with the situation. “Listen, Luke. I know how devoted you are to your family.” It was one of his most attractive qualities. “I’m not going to hurt Sam, if that’s what’s worrying you. My focus is on reestablishing Sugar Tots and hopefully helping the Cupcake Lovers. That, and reaching some sort of understanding with you regarding my baby.”

Luke steered the SUV into the driveway of the magnificent old Colonial that Rae had known as Daisy’s home. Thank God. She’d reached her emotional limit for today. Three-quarters to numb, at least she wasn’t as worried now about her meeting with Rocky.

“I’d mind,” Luke said as Rae unbuckled her seat belt. “If you went out with Adam,” he added when she cast him a questioning look. “Or anyone else. I can’t help it. It bothers me. You’re pregnant with my baby.”

Rae’s stomach knotted. She was picking up a theme here. A theme that revolved around her behaving in an expected manner. Not because Luke had feelings for her, but because she was the mother of his child. Period. She shouldn’t have expected more, but dammit, she’d hoped.

“If you think I’m going to be celibate for the rest of my life, think again.” She plowed on, needing him to know she wasn’t a doormat or easily manipulated. “I’m not saying I’m looking to get involved with someone now, but if an attraction happens to flare, I’m not going to ignore it.” She pushed open the door, heart pounding as she issued a parting plea. “Please don’t come inside and please don’t wait. I’ll call a cab when I’m ready to leave. And Luke,” she said, willing every fiber of dignity and calm, “don’t seek me out again until you’ve thought this out. Either you want to me to settle in Sugar Creek so you can play an active and constant role in your child’s life, or you don’t. This isn’t about us. There is no us.” He’d made that pretty clear as far as Rae was concerned. “This is about the baby.”

“Wait.” Luke reached across the seat and caught her wrist. “I need a favor.”

She couldn’t imagine.

“I was hoping … I need a mentor.”

As in someone to help him conquer his reading disability? Was he seriously confiding in her? Admitting he had a problem? Reaching out for help? She couldn’t believe it.

“I’m this close to getting kicked out of the Cupcake Lovers.”

“What?”

“I joined the club a few weeks ago. Sam didn’t tell you?”

“No.” Shocked, Rae frowned. “You bake?”

“Not well. Hence the upcoming boot. I thought … If you could come over, give me some lessons.”

“Why me?”

“I’m too close to everyone else.”

She thought about that. “Harder to take offense when being advised by a stranger. I get that.” Sad that it made her feel even more distant from the father of her child. “Regardless, I’m not sure it’s a good idea.”

“You think spending time together, getting to know one another better given the circumstances, is a bad idea?”

It was in fact a brilliant idea. Luke had found safe common ground. Cupcakes. Either they’d hit it off as friends, discover they were, against odds, a good match, or … they’d end up despising each other. At least they’d know how to proceed instead of lingering in this wretched limbo. Rae nodded. “Fine. I’ll drop by tomorrow. What time?”

“Noon. I’ll pick you up. We’ll do lunch, then bake.” He squeezed her hand. “Sound good?”

It sounded dangerous. “See you then.” Rae slid out of the SUV, feeling more rattled than she’d felt all day and that was saying a lot. Even though she had to trudge through snowdrifts and freezing winds to get to Rocky’s house, Rae’s skin still burned from Luke’s touch. She couldn’t teach him to bake in a day. It could take weeks. And a good dose of one-on-one time. The prospect was daunting and thrilling and somewhat suspicious. She couldn’t shake the feeling that she was being manipulated by Luke—the Charmer of Sugar Creek—Monroe.

But to what end?

“Wow.” Rocky Monroe leaned against the doorjamb and blatantly stared.

Rae bristled. She’d been in town less than twenty-four hours and she was already over the gawking and whispering. She was tired and hungry and emotionally spent from two rounds with Luke in one day. She’d waited until he’d pulled out of the drive before knocking on the door. She’d counted to ten while collecting her wits. Wits Rocky had scattered with a simple “Wow.”

Forcing what she hoped was a friendly smile, Rae summoned patience while dragging her fingers through her choppy locks. “The color and cut are extreme, I know. That’s what happens when you tell a stylist you want something drastically different and give them carte blanche.”

“And I thought I was being adventurous when I let Jayce cut my bangs. Maybe I should spice things up and get a makeover.”

“You don’t need a makeover, Rocky.” Rae was pretty sure Jayce and every other man in Sugar Creek would agree. Rocky was a natural stunner. She typically plaited her long golden curls into two braids or pulled them into a high ponytail—simple styles that suited her down-to-earth personality and athletic lifestyle. Instead of chasing trends, she opted for T-shirts and jeans and sneakers or clogs. Even with no more than tinted lip balm, Luke’s sister was Hollywood gorgeous. Olivia, who compared all people to movie stars, would dub Rocky the Scarlett Johansson of Sugar Creek. “Besides, you wouldn’t want to do anything drastic so close to your wedding day. Congratulations, by the way.”

“Thanks.”

A frigid wind cut though Rae’s weary bones. Frowning, she hunched her shoulders and shook off a chill. “Mind if I come inside?”

“Sorry. To think I used to work in hospitality.” Rocky stepped back and waved Rae inside. “Give me your coat. Would you like some tea, coffee, wine?”

“I’m good.” The sooner they got this meeting over with the better. Rae was feeling more lightheaded by the minute. Skipping lunch hadn’t been smart, plus she was already drained from a full and emotionally awkward day. “Thank you for meeting with me on such short notice.”

“I confess I’m curious.” Rocky draped Rae’s coat on an antique coat tree then turned. “About a lot of things.”

Rae wasn’t surprised by Rocky’s wary tone and expression, but she was disappointed. Rocky, like her grandmother, Daisy, had always treated Rae to a smile and an abundance of good will. A small, no, a big part of Rae had hoped her written apology had smoothed any ruffled feathers regarding her abrupt departure from Sugar Creek. Just now, Rocky looked pretty ruffled.

“Where’s your dog?” Rae asked as they moved into the warm and cozy living room. An appearance from that furry bundle of joy might help ease the tension.

“Brewster’s had cabin fever lately, what with all the snow. Jayce had business in Pixley so he took Brewster with him. Good thing,” Rocky said while inviting Rae to take a seat. “I wouldn’t want fur-boy getting hair all over your nice clothes.”

“I wouldn’t mind,” Rae said, ignoring the light jab at her stylish attire. She’d dressed to impress for a reason, although maybe that hadn’t been the best idea.

Rocky dropped into an opposing matching chair. She shook her head. “I can’t get over how much you’ve changed.”

“Only on the outside. Speaking of change,” Rae said, bulldozing forward, “Sam told me about the fire and how you lost everything. I’m so sorry, Rocky. I know how much you loved the Red Clover.”

“I’ve come to terms.” Her clipped response indicated she wasn’t going down that personal road. “You’ve seen Sam?”

Clearly the spotlight was on Rae. “He called me a couple of weeks ago. We’ve talked a few times since. He was also nice enough to pick me up at the airport last night.”