“Mawdy, it’s no big deal. Really. Yeesh. This is Joe,” Kate sighed.

“Yeah,” Keira agreed, “yeesh.”

God, they acted like this was no big deal and I should just…

Relax.

Thinking that, I smiled to myself and also defended myself. “I’m tryin’ to be a good Mom.”

“You don’t have to try,” Kate told me.

Another sock to the gut. Winded.

I’d never had a more beautiful compliment.

I took in my wonderful, gorgeous girls, leaned forward, my forearms on the counter and said, “I just want you girls to be happy.”

And to that, Kate asked, “Yeah, you ever think that we want the same for you?”

That’s when the tears hit my eyes.

“God, I love you guys,” I whispered.

“Love you too, Mawdy,” Kate whispered back, also leaning in, also with tears in her eyes.

“Yeah, me too,” Keira whispered, leaning in as well with tears in her eyes.

I got off my forearms but reached out and grabbed both their hands, giving them a squeeze.

Then Keira asked, “Where are they with the frozen custard?”

Kate and I laughed and finally I relaxed. They were good. They were even happy for me, for themselves and even for Joe and Keira was right. Enough of the heavy stuff, we’d had more than our fair share of that. It was time to move onto hot fudge frozen custard sundaes.

I let them both go, grabbed my cell off the counter and called Joe.

It rang twice then, “Yo.”

“Hi, talk’s over, you have the Winters Girls seal of approval.”

“Good to know, buddy,” Joe said, sounding like he was smiling then again our talk lasted about ten minutes so he knew he was golden.

“Though,” I went on to warn, “you’re gonna lose it if you don’t get home soon with the custard.”

“It’ll be awhile,” Joe told me.

“Is it busy?” I asked.

“Don’t know. We’re at the garden center,” Joe said.

I blinked at the counter then looked between Kate and Keira before asking, “Why are you at the garden center?”

“Buyin’ you a new grill,” he answered and I blinked again.

My old grill out on the deck was covered by a tarp, an old tatty tarp which was good because the gas grill was older and tattier. It destroyed my whole deck vision with my wrought iron furniture and flowers so it was hidden in a corner. Tim had meant to build me a built-in grill in our backyard. He had it all planned, even bought the bricks he was going to use but he died before he could do it.

“You’re buying a new grill?” I asked and Kate smiled at a smiling Keira.

“Buddy, don’t even wanna look under that tarp,” Joe answered.

“It’s not pretty, but it works.”

“A man’s gotta have the grill he’s gotta have,” Joe told me.

“What?”

“I’m not grillin’ chops on a shitty grill,” Joe said instead of repeating himself but I was stuck on the idea of Joe grilling anything.

“You’re grillin’ the chops?” I asked.

He sounded somewhat impatient when he replied, “Vi, I go to the grocery store, I grill chops. I’m a guy but I gotta eat and you get food at the store and guys grill meat, that’s what we do.”

“So you know how to grill?” I asked hesitantly.

“You know how Vinnie taught Benny how to make a pie?” Joe asked me.

“Yeah.”

“Well, my Dad could do one thing good, grill, and he taught me how to do it. So, yeah, I can grill.”

“Okay.”

“We done talkin’?”

“Um… how long are you gonna be?”

“A lot longer, we’re not done talkin’.”

I smiled at the phone then told him, “The girls and me may be at the store when you get back.”

“Be a fool’s errand since I took your list with me.”

“You’re goin’ to the store?” I breathed, thinking both of rugged alpha male Joe roaming the aisles of a grocery store (which was shocking in itself and I’d already faced this impossibility the day before, but it was such an impossibility it was worthy of further emotion) and of the fact I didn’t have to go to the grocery store (which was a welcome change).

“Shit,” he muttered into the phone, clearly not wanting to have the grocery store discussion again.

“Okay, buy a grill, go to the store, be domestic,” I said quickly, “just don’t forget the custard.”

“I won’t forget.”

“See you later.”

“Yeah,” then he called, “Vi?”

“Yeah, honey?”

“It’s all good.”

“What?”

“Us,” he said, I got that winded feeling again, liking the idea of “us”, liking that he knew to get me, he got the girls and he wanted that and he wanted that to be good and he went on. “Girls’re home, we’re together, it’s all good. Now you gonna relax, baby?”

I tipped my head to the side and whispered, “Yeah.”

“Be home soon.”

Yes, he would and I liked that most of all.

“Yeah,” I whispered, “later, honey.”

“Later, buddy.”

I slid my phone closed and looked at my girls.

“We’re getting a new grill,” I announced and they both smiled.

* * *

Joe and Dane didn’t buy a grill.

They bought the grill to end all grills. It took them an hour to set it up on my deck. It was gleaming and huge and totally went with my deck vision.

Then they loaded up the old, tatty grill and took it to the dump.

Then they came back and Joe grilled chops. We ate his chops with my homemade potato salad and blanched green beans tossed in sesame dressing. We finished this with my homemade hot fudge sundaes with huge squirts of whipped cream, chopped nuts and a cherry.

Joe was not wrong. His father must have been the master grill artist like Vinnie was a master pizza maker. Joe’s grilled chops were the best, even better than Tim’s and Tim could man a grill.

We ate on the deck.

All afternoon and evening, pretending to have stuff to do in her backyard but really being nosy, Tina came out every once in awhile to watch this activity, the grill building, the chop cooking, the family eating on the deck.

Tina didn’t look happy about Joe’s sudden domestication.

Revenge was sweet.

* * *

“Buddy?” Joe called when we were in bed, I was in his tee, my cheek to his chest, his heart beating in my ear and I was half asleep.

“Yeah?”

“That first time, shoulda made me a hot fudge sundae.”

My head came up and I looked in the direction of his face even though I couldn’t really see him because it was dark.

“What?”

“Before I fucked you over the first time, you shoulda made me a hot fudge sundae.”

“Why?” I asked.

“I wouldn’t have fucked you over. I woulda taken you to Vegas.”

“Vegas?”

“Married you, Vi,” he said, sounding like he was close to laughing.

“What?” I breathed.

“They’re that good.”

“What are?”

His hand curled around the back of my head and he urged, definitely laughing now, “Stick with me here, honey. Your sundaes. They’re that good.”

My sundaes were good, I loved my sundaes. The hot fudge was Bea’s recipe but I made it better simply by putting in a bit of cinnamon.

Still, I asked, “You wouldn’t have told me you were done with me if I’d made you a sundae, instead, you would have married me?”

“Yeah.”

“Are you tryin’ to piss me off when I’m half asleep?”

“Just givin’ you a head’s up on what’ll keep me happy.”

I pushed up higher. “You are tryin’ to piss me off when I’m half asleep.”

He curled up, his arms went around me and suddenly I was on my back, Joe on me.

His mouth against mine, he muttered, “I’m teasin’ you, baby.”

“I don’t like to be teased.”

“Then whoever did it wasn’t doin’ it right,” he whispered.

My breath caught, my body stilled and I stared at his shadowed head in the dark.

He did remember everything.

“Joe,” I whispered back.

His mouth slid from mine to my ear and he murmured. “Don’t say my name like that in this bed unless you want me to fuck you, Vi.”

My arms went around him, my hands gliding across the skin of his back, my head turned slightly so my mouth was at his ear and I whispered, “Joe.”

He laughed softly in my ear.

Then he fucked me.

* * *

In the middle of the night I jolted awake, breathing heavily, the dream still had hold of me.

“Buddy.”

“I’m okay.”

We were spooning, his arms tightened around me and I pressed back into his body.

“Same dream?” he asked.

“Bits different but mostly, yeah,” I answered.

Joe rolled closer, giving me some of his weight, pressing me into the bed, his big body cocooning mine.

“You wanna tell me what it is?” he asked.

“No, no, I need to let it go.”

“All right, buddy.”

“Just, keep close,” I whispered.

“Not goin’ anywhere.”

“Good.”

I felt his face in my hair, his breath stirring it and he held me close, his body a protective shell, until I fell asleep.

* * *

Sunday, Joe (and Dane) learned what being a part of the Winters Girls clan meant when we all went to look at bathroom and kitchen fittings.

Kate and Keira’s visions for Joe’s house clashed significantly, they couldn’t agree on anything and discussion got heated.

In store three when the salesperson was backing away, Dane was faking getting a text and I was about to intervene, Joe waded in.

“Right,” he said in a commanding way, both Kate and Keira stopped arguing and their eyes cut to him, “Kate, you get the kitchen, Keira, the bathroom…” he turned to me, “Vi, you pick the paint and the carpet.”

“I want the kitchen,” Keira unwisely put in and Joe’s eyes went to her so she snapped her mouth shut.

“That’s cool because I’d prefer the bathroom,” Kate said.

“Done,” Joe decreed and the girls smiled.

Simple, logical and doable.

Shit, he was like Superman.

* * *

Monday I went back to work, so did Kate, Dane went home to his folks and we managed our first day living life the way it was going to be without any real drama.

I was relieved to see that both girls acted like Joe was a natural fit in the house but it became clear Joe didn’t feel it was so natural. Joe had things on his mind.

This became clear at the end of the day when I was cleaning off my makeup in the bathroom, Joe was in my bed and I was thinking about our evening.

When I got home from work, Kate was already home and Keira arrived ten minutes after me. She’d been laying out by Heather’s pool all day, dedicated to building her tan to the highest possible heights prior to school starting. When Keira got home, Joe told us he was taking us to eat at Shanghai Salon. I was thrilled at this idea; it meant I didn’t have to cook. The girls were thrilled because they loved Chinese food.

When we came back, Joe got a phone call that lasted awhile and the girls and I put in a movie. Kate was in an armchair, Keira and I were stretched out on the couch, Keira in front of me, my arm around her, not unusual for us (or for Kate and me for that matter). Also not unusual for Tim and one of the girls when he was alive.

Joe was taking his call in the study, I heard it end then I felt him approach the back of the couch.

Then I felt the cushions behind me being pulled out and both Keira and I looked up as Joe put a hip to the couch then rolled over it, sliding in behind me. With his elbow in the couch, head in hand, his eyes went to the TV as his arm circled both Keira and me.

I laid still and breathless but looked at my daughter.

She was still and breathless, her neck twisted, looking at me.

Then her face went soft, her lips tipped up at the ends and she snuggled into me, forcing me to snuggle into Joe, his arm tightened, my body relaxed and we watched the movie. But before I looked back at the screen I glanced at Kate to see her eyes on the television but her lips were tipped up like her sister’s.

And, taking my makeup off, I realized this was Joe staking his claim in private and in public. We were his, he wanted us to know it and he wanted everyone else to know it too.

I stared at myself in the mirror, thinking that Mike told me Joe told him that he was going to give me everything. When Mike told me that, I didn’t know what it meant, I just knew that the promise of it felt brilliant.

Now I knew what it meant.