“What? When the hell were Audrey and Jax together?” Max blurts out. “That’s weird.”

I stand up and clasp my hand firmly onto Max’s shoulder and steer him out the door. When we reach the hallway, I say, “Thanks for that, dude. You’ve got a big-ass mouth.”

“Where is she?” he asks, completely ignoring my comment. I shrug my shoulders and glance down at my shoes. “You fucked it up, didn’t you?” There’s nothing I can say because he’s right. I couldn’t have messed this up any better. But right now I need to be here. My focus is Jaxon, no matter how often my mind drifts over to Audrey.

“I didn’t tell anyone about our relationship. Jax used to date her back in high school and that ended beyond fucked up. I was going to tell Jax and then time got away from me...”

“You were a pussy,” he seethes.

“Yeah I was, okay? But I was finally going to tell him the night of the beach party.”

“How convenient. I knew there was something weird going on, but I didn’t realize you were keeping her hush-hush,” he says.

I drag my fingers through my hair in frustration and breathe in and out raggedly. “It wasn’t her, it was us. She understood.”

“No, she didn’t understand, but she’s way too nice and trusting to say otherwise. Then you went and did something to mess it all up, didn’t you?” His voice rises in anger but when he realizes his surroundings, he forces himself to calm down. He turns away and begins walking toward the elevator before swiveling around to glare at me again. “You better make this right, or watch someone else do it for you,” he says in a deathly calm voice.

When he hits the button to call the elevator, I race toward him. “Max, what are you about to do?” I can’t stomach the idea of him going to comfort her.

Calmly, he steps inside and looks me square in the eyes. “Maybe exactly what you should be doing.”

The doors begin to close and I shout, “Max, what the hell?! Don’t touch her, don’t you dare touch her!” My fists bang on the metal door and I stop it before it can close on me.

He leans his head out and gets close to my face. “How the hell are you going to get all worked up over a girl you just tossed aside? You’re my friend, I wouldn’t touch her. All I’m saying is, there are others who are ready and waiting to offer her the world.”

“I have to stay here with Jaxon,” I defend in a defeated tone.

He shrugs his shoulders and steps back inside. “Well, you better hope you’re worth the wait. Oh, and by the way, you might want to fill mama in on all of this. She looks mighty confused over there,” he says, nodding his head behind me as the doors finally slide closed.

Slowly, I pivot around to see my mom standing casually outside of Jaxon’s door, waiting for me to finish. She heard it all.

I raise my hands in surrender and rush to defend Audrey from all of the horrible things she must be remembering. “Mom, she’s not who we thought she was. She’s beautiful and amazing. She’s kind and forgiving. Thank God for the forgiving part because boy did Jaxon and I need it.”

“No girl wants to be kept a dirty little secret, son,” she says, as I walk up next to her. Her line of thought immediately confuses me. She isn’t thinking about the troublemaker we thought Audrey was. She’s thinking about how I rudely kept her a secret from everyone I loved.

When she sees my wheels turning, she says, “I trust your judgment, Jace. I always have. If you say she’s a good person, then I have to trust that.”

“If Jaxon were awake, he could vouch for me. Em loves her. Quinn and Cole have become friends with her as well.”

“Wow, Em loves her?” she asks in a surprised tone.

“Em bulldogged her into telling her the story of everything that happened. Shit, Mom, we had it all wrong. So very wrong.”

“And then you shoved her out of here right before I arrived, correct?” she questions.

“How did you know?”

“Jace, your greatest weakness has always been caring too much about what others think of you. And I’m your mother, I can read you like a book.”

I groan and lean my head against the wall outside of Jaxon’s room. “Yeah, I yelled at her to leave. In front of everyone. I freaked out, Mom. Cole told me you were coming and she was trying to comfort me and...I just pushed her away.”

She gasps and asks, “Jace, didn’t you learn anything from Jaxon’s mistake? At what point did I ever teach you two that it was okay to publicly embarrass girls? Especially the ones you supposedly love.”

“We’re idiots.”

“You got that right,” she grumbles. When she disappears inside the room, I try to call Audrey. Three times. No answer.

- Seventeen -

AUDREY -

Five days into my post-Jace life, I hit a groove. I’ve picked up all of Em’s shifts at work while still working my own. Ed tried to convince me to give some to others but I need the distraction. I’ve been doing schoolwork like a madwoman, and now I’ve almost completed all of my assignments for this semester.

I rarely sleep, and when it does come around, it’s only for a few hours here and there. I feel as if I’m running on pure adrenaline, but I know eventually it will hit me and I’ll crash hard. I’ve scrubbed down the apartment and even tried to hit the gym with Lane once. Going to a gym that only has men is not fun. I don’t care how hot those guys are. I never want to be that self-conscious about the way I look while working out again.

I get off work early tonight because the customers actually clear out pretty quick for once. Lane has bags under his eyes from the stress of trying to figure what he can do for me, but I don’t need anyone’s help. I’m handling this fine. I’m ready to get on with my life.

I realize that for five days I’ve kept Lane from sleeping a full night. So when I climb into bed, I force myself to stay and not roam the apartment. Just as I begin to calm down and think about the idea of sleep, my window slides open. I startle as I watch a pair of long legs slip through the window. Chuck gets up with a wagging tail to greet my intruder.

I can instantly tell by the size and build that it’s Jace. I stay quiet and watch him navigate himself through my room. He steps out of his shoes, slips off his pants, and yanks his shirt over his head. Slowly, he crawls into my noisy bed and searches for me in the dark. He doesn’t say a word, and I can’t catch enough breath to formulate one.

When his hand reaches my body, he grabs a hold of me and pulls me into the safety of his arms. He’s breathing heavily and he buries his face in my hair. His hands hold me tight and it’s hard to catch a breath from the amount of pressure he’s placing on me, but I don’t have the heart to pull away. He needs me.

“Jace...” I whisper in the dark. But he never responds and when I wake up in the morning, I’m the one left all alone this time.

* * *

I bend down to pull out my newest batch of blueberry muffins. The apartment smells delicious, but I’m not sure what I’m going to do with all of these baked goods.

“Jesus Christ, Audrey. If you pull one more batch of carbs out of that oven, I’ll go insane!” Lane grumbles from behind me.

“I think you’re already there,” I reply calmly.

“I don’t like this. I don’t like how you’re acting. You’re not dealing with this right. Shouldn’t you be crying or bitching about him or eating a tub of ice cream?” he questions, while grabbing a chocolate muffin and taking a big bite.

I look around the kitchen at all of the pastries I’ve made this past week and a half. I don’t know why I did it, except that it helps to keep my mind occupied. Unfortunately, I’m running out of ideas. Since sleep doesn’t come and I can only work so many hours, baking is the next best thing.

He looks down at the muffin that he just mindlessly took a bite out of and growls loudly. He glares at me in frustration, as if he didn’t realize he was eating the baked goodness, and harshly throws the remainder in the trash.

“See? I can’t keep eating this junk! Make it go away.”

“Shouldn’t you be happy I’m not crying all over the place?” I ask, while scrubbing down the counters.

“No, because I know you’re sad, but for some reason you’re holding it all in. Pretend I’m a chick.” He props his elbows up on the bar, rests his chin in his hands, and looks at me thoughtfully. Brat. “Seriously doll, pour your little heart out. I’m here to listen.”

“You’re ridiculous,” I reply, while searching for a container that can hold the blueberry muffins. I haven’t told Lane about Jace’s late-night visit a few evenings ago. I don’t know what to think of it myself, so I can’t say it out loud.

“Talk,” he growls.

“No,” I reply flatly.

“Talk.”

“Where do you think we’ll live after we graduate?” I ask, changing the subject.

“That’s not what I wanted to talk about and you know it. But I figured I’d have to follow you to Texas.”

“You would have done that?” I ask, surprised.

“Of course. You’re my family.”

I walk around the counter and hug him tightly. “Now you’re just trying to make me cry.”

“Did it work?” he laughs.

“No!” I laugh while pushing away from him.

“Well, just to humor you, let’s go check out my hometown.”

“New York?” I ask, surprised.

“Yeah. I haven’t seen my mom in a while. I don’t know if I’d ever want to live there again, but we can go look.”

“This coming week?” I ask eagerly and then quickly add, “We can afford a break from school.”

“Why are you jumping on this?” He seems unsure about my motives.

“I just want to plan a real future.”

“Oooh-kay. I’ll book it. Even though I think you need to give Jace some more time. Jax isn’t even awake yet.”

“Lane, he’s never going to get over what others think I did. And I don’t want to talk about him anymore.” I finish packing up as many muffins and cookies as I can get into our plastic containers. “I’m going to take these up to Em and Quinn.”

“Might run into him,” he speculates.

“Nah, Em said she’d come down to get them.”

“Just try to go and see him, doll. He was a fucking asshole, I’ll give you that, but guys have no idea how to handle emotions. Don’t you think that even if he can’t admit it, he still needs you?”

“I’m going to get ready, I’ll see you later tonight,” I smile, clearly not giving into his probing.

* * *

I arrive at the hospital and decide to wait outside in the fresh air. Hospital air is stagnant and stuffy. I would kill to be in there holding Jace’s hand, but since I can’t do that, I’d rather not go in at all. My hands bounce the plastic containers around as I wait for Em to come down.

“Audrey?” I hear my name called from close by.

I turn toward the sound of my name and freeze when I spot Jace and Jaxon’s mom coming around the outside corner of the hospital. She tosses down a cigarette and twists her foot on it slowly to extinguish the embers.

“Please, don’t tell anyone about that. I only do it when I’m stressed,” she says and gestures toward the white stick that’s now crushed into the concrete.

“Secret’s safe with me,” I mumble.

I turn toward the revolving doors, hoping I can catch sight of Em. Julie Riley is the last person I wanted to see today. She walks closer toward me and I begin to bounce impatiently on my toes. I haven’t seen her since the day Jaxon and I told her we had run off to get married. She was beyond furious with both of us. I never thought I would see her get so angry. I ran home that day. It was the only time I ever ran to my house and not away from it.

Em strolls out through the doors and smiles cheerfully at me. I don’t understand this weird calmness she has about her. Her boyfriend is lying in a coma and she acts like there is finally world peace.

“Thank you so much for these,” she calls out. I hand over the containers when she reaches me. “I want to thank you for taking over my shifts at work too.”

“Please, don’t even worry about it. You shouldn’t have to think about work right now. Although I am going out of town next week, so Ed will probably have a coronary.”

She laughs a bit too lightly, almost as if it’s forced. In that moment, I can see the wall she’s built. She’s trying to protect herself from the hurt and the possibility of actually losing Jaxon. My heart breaks for her. Here I’ve been feeling sorry for myself, while Em has been going through genuine pain.