"I get it more than you realize," he said, taking a more direct approach. "In fact, I get that this is more about you than it is about Cassie."

An impatient sound escaped her. "What the hell are you talking about?"

He shrugged. "It's about you and your past and how you've lived your life."

"How I've lived my life?" she repeated, brows raised incredulously. "Please, do tell me what you think you know."

If she wanted to play that kind of hardball, then he was game, and he didn't hesitate to step up to the plate. "I think that as a result of what happened with Tim and those other boys who thought you were easy, you decided to use sex to your own advantage, and as a way to keep any guy from getting too close. Sex is pleasurable and easy, and if you keep it all about the physical, it keeps you in control and there's no threat to your emotions. How am I doing so far, sweetheart?"

"Not very well," she lied. "You're way off base."

"Really?" he drawled lazily. "Then what have you been doing with me for the past few weeks? You've been trying to use sex to scratch whatever itch you think you might have, and you've been annoyed as hell that I haven't given in to your numerous attempts at seduction and screwed you, like every other guy that's come before me. That would have been ideal for you, wouldn't it have been?"

She jabbed him in the chest with a finger. "You are so full of shit."

He laughed, but the sound lacked any true humor. "Personally, I think I'm hitting way too close to the truth, and you don't like what you're hearing."

"Go to hell, Daniel." Her nostrils flared, as did her temper. "In fact, while we're at it, why don't we just put an end to this thing between us, right here and now."

That didn't surprise Daniel one bit. It was an easy way out, and she was taking it. "Just in case you didn't know, because you haven't had all that much experience with them, it's called a relationship, Syd."

She waved a hand between them and adopted an I-don't-give-a-damn attitude. "Yeah, whatever you want to call it, it's not going anywhere."

Oh, but it was, or else she wouldn't be scrambling to end things. "It's just not going where you want it to go. Isn't that what you mean?"

She glanced away and rubbed at her forehead with her fingers. He knew he was putting her through an emotional wringer, but it was necessary if they were going to have any chance at a future together, and he wanted that with her more than anything.

Finally, she looked back at him, her fortitude back in place. "The truth of the matter is that a relationship between us would never work. We're just too different, Daniel."

No way was he letting her off with such a simple, unexplained statement. "How so?" he persisted.

She clearly wasn't happy that he was pushing the issue, but to her credit she didn't brash off his question. "Look at you, and look at me. Compare your childhood to the one I just told you about. Compare my heroin addict mother and my father who was a nameless John, to your wealthy family who no doubt cares about those things," she said critically. "Your parents would take one look at me, and once they found out I had a daughter at the age of fourteen out of wedlock, and that I own a bar where I dance on the countertops to entertain the customers and help sell more alcohol, they'd probably disown you for being involved with someone like me."

Disowning him would be a bit extreme, but unfortunately, he knew his parents had a tendency to judge people. "I don't give a shit what my parents think of you."

"Well, you should," she said, her gaze bright with conviction. "They no doubt expect someone better for you. Someone who is sweet and refined and loves going to Sunday brunch with the family and would be satisfied to be a stay at home mother and wife."

All the things she believed she wasn't. "My parents do expect a lot from me, but I've never bended to their expectations and I don't intend to now," he stated firmly. "If that were the case, I'd be a doctor, not a math teacher, and I would have married the sweet, refined debutante my mother set me up with when I was twenty. This is my life, not theirs, and I don't need their permission to date you, or anyone else."

She suddenly looked tired and weary, but she didn't back down from her own personal fight. "Let me set you straight, Daniel. I'm the kind of woman that men fuck, not the kind that they take home to meet their family or marry."

He met and held her dark gaze. "I disagree."

"Well, then it's time for you to pull your head out of the clouds and face the reality of who and what I am." Her expression hardened, grew cool and defiant and relentless in her quest to make him understand. "I was a stripper in a gentlemen's club for years, because the tips were outstanding and it helped me to survive and take care of Cassie. Men paid me damn good money for the illusion of sex, no big surprise there," she added wryly. "But do you know how I got the business loan to open up my own bar? The guy at the bank struck a deal with me. Sex in exchange for him pushing my loan application through. So, I slept with him to get what I wanted. Not exactly what a good girl would do, now is it?"

Knowing that she was baiting him, he didn't bother to answer the theoretical question.

"And like every other guy who's come before you, that's all this thing between us is about. Sex. Except you won't give me what I want."

A slight, mocking smile curved the corner of his mouth. "Yeah, imagine that."

Her annoyance spilled over into a deeper, darker resentment. "There's only one thing I want from you, Daniel, so don't make this affair into something more than it is. In fact, since you won't give me what I want, get the hell out of my bar and don't come back." She turned away and started back toward her desk.

Oh, she'd like that, and her pretense of indifference pissed him off more than anything else, because he knew that she felt something for him. That it was more than just a physical thing between them, and now she was quick to end their affair before those emotions had a chance to take root and grow. Well, he wasn't about to let her walk away without giving her something to think about.

He grabbed her arm before she passed him, and in the next moment he had her pressed up against the wall, his body pinning hers in place. Her lips parted to say something, most likely to tell him off with that smart mouth of hers, but he didn't give her the chance. He slanted his lips over hers and took full and complete possession of her mouth. His tongue sank deep, tasting, taking, ravaging-and being the bold and reckless woman that she was, Sydney kissed him back just as aggressively, and with an unmistakable edge of anger.

As their mouths and tongues dueled for supremacy, she pushed her hands between their bodies and skimmed her fingers down to the waistband of his pants. She started unbuckling his belt, and he grasped her wrists, pulled her hands away, and secured them at the sides of her head, refusing to let her take control of this situation, or make it all about sex.

No, this was about them connecting on a deeper, more intimate level. This was about breaking down barriers and getting Sydney to open up and trust him with her heart and emotions.

A moan of frustration rose up in her throat, and he changed the tenor of the kiss. Easing up on the hard pressure of his mouth against hers, he kissed her slow and gentle, and used his lips to coax and seduce. Gradually, he felt the change in her, too. Her tense body relaxed and flowed against his, and the hands he'd pinned against the wall grew slack, as well. Her mouth softened beneath his, and he swirled his tongue around hers, tasting that soul-deep vulnerability of hers, along with the fear of letting someone close enough to hurt her.

By the time he lifted his head and stared into her glassy eyes, they were both breathing hard. But he still had a point to drive home, and this time he did it with harsh and direct words. "Giving you what you want-fucking you-would be so easy to do, Sydney," he said, his voice low and rough. "But I want to give you what you need."

Her bottom lip trembled ever so slightly, "You have no idea what I need," she whispered raggedly, still intent on denying any shred of feeling she had for him.

"That's where you're wrong. I do know what you need, because I need the same thing." Releasing her, he stepped back, and wasn't quite sure what to make of the flash of panic he saw in her eyes. But that was part of their problem… her inability to share those fears and insecurities with him.

But he had no qualms about putting himself out there for her, his heart and soul, wholly and completely. "It's okay to let someone love you, Sydney," he said gently, and felt his chest tighten when a telling moisture filled her eyes. "It's okay to let me love you, because I'm not going to hurt you, or disappoint you the way so many people in your past have. But I want more than a temporary sexual fix or a hot affair, and you deserve more than that, too."

She lifted her chin a fraction and said nothing. The woman was so damn stubborn, and deeply wounded, and she wasn't nearly as tough as she wanted everyone to believe.

"I'm going to go, just like you asked me to," he said, leaving any chance at a future together solely up to her. He managed a small smile. "If someday you decide you want to give the whole relationship thing a try, you know where to find me."

On impulse, he stepped back toward her and brushed his lips along her cheek in a soft kiss, and took a few selfish seconds to breathe in her scent so he could memorize it for later. When he pulled back, he had to steel himself against the devastated look on her face, and it took every ounce of strength he possessed to turn around and walk out of her life.


Chapter Eighteen


"YOU'RE awfully quiet. Are you okay?"

Lora turned her gaze from the passenger window of Joel's SUV to the man sitting in the driver's seat as he navigated the way to his sister's gallery opening in downtown Chicago. Between watching the road and glancing at her, she caught glimpses of concern in his gaze and summoned a reassuring smile.

"Yeah, I'm good." As good as to be expected, she supposed, considering it was only a matter of time before the two of them went their separate ways.

It had been three days since they'd left Zach behind at the cabin with Kevin, and Joel's guys had begun the process of tracking down Lanny Mendoza to pay off her brother's debt. Once that was done, and her safety was no longer an issue, there was no reason for Joel to be by her side twenty-four/seven. He'd already made mention of a security case that was previously lined up for him, and he seemed anxious to get back to real work.

She knew the end was inevitable, yet there was that deep-seated hope she couldn't help but harbor that Joel would come around and give the two of them a chance. But he'd made his stand on relationships more than clear, and she was forced to accept that their affair had been as temporary as his presence in her life.

"Try not to feel too overwhelmed by my family, okay?" Joel's tone was light, as was the easygoing grin he cast her way. "According to Mia, just about everyone is going to be at the opening, so I'm sure you'll be whisked around for a dozen or more introductions. There's my brothers and their wives, and my cousins and their spouses, too."

"Actually, I'm looking forward to meeting everyone." And, she was interested in watching his family dynamics in action.

"The only ones you won't get to meet are the parents, and the little ones." He put on his blinker and made a right-hand turn down a side street. "Mia felt too uneasy about having toddlers in the gallery with all the glass designs, so the grandparents offered to stay at home and watch the rugrats."

She rested her head against the back of the seat and smiled at him. "That was nice of them."

"Are you kidding? They're loving having grandkids and want to be around them any chance they get." He pulled into a parking lot, which was already half filled, and found a spot near the entrance of the gallery. "Before long we're going to have an entire soccer team at family gatherings," he said, genuine affection in his tone.

She laughed, easily imagining Joel as an uncle, with little ones clamoring for his attention. Despite his rough and tough exterior, the man had a huge, caring heart. She'd seen it numerous times over the past few weeks, and it was just one of the many wonderful qualities he possessed that she'd fallen in love with.