Johanna Lindsey - Brave the Wild Wind

“I promise to come back. But I want you to promise you’ll give Chase a chance. He’s a good man.”

Jessie sighed. “We can talk about that when you come back.”

Rachel grinned. “Stubborn to the end, my darling.”

Jessie handed Rachel the diary.

“You didn’t read all of it, did you?” Rachel asked, remembering the heartache she had poured into it recently.

“No, but I’d like to.”

Rachel patted Jessie’s cheek, then gathered her in her arms again for a last hug. “I don’t think either of us needs to read this book again.”

“I love you, Mother.”

“Oh, Jessica, I’ve waited so long to hear you say that.” The tears began again. “I love you, too, and I’ll be back soon, darling.”

Long after the train was out of sight, Jessie stood on the empty platform. Jeb had wandered off to the saloon once he saw Jessie and Rachel embrace. He knew Jessie would need to be alone awhile.

Chase found Jessie at the depot later. “She’s gone?” he asked hesitantly.

Jessie wouldn’t look at him. “Yes.” She continued to stare down the empty track.

“Why the long face?” He asked hesitantly.

Jessie raised her eyes slowly. “She wouldn’t stay—because of you.”

“Now just a damn minute, Jessie. How did I get into this?”

“She thought I should be alone with you.”

“Oh, well.” Chase grinned. “The idea has merit.”

“It does not!” Jessie retorted before she swung around and headed for Blackstar.

Chase followed quickly." Where are you going?”

“Home.”

“You can’t, Jessie. It’s too late to ride all that way.”

“I can ride by moonlight.”

“You’ll freeze,” he pointed out.

“I’ll be riding too fast to feel the cold.”

He grabbed her shoulder. “What’s your hurry? You’ve never ridden home at night before.”

“I want familiar surroundings. I want to sleep in my own bed, in my own room, with my own things around me.” She shook away, angry that she had said that much. She was feeling bereft, as if she had lost her mother all over again. “I’m not asking you to ride with me if that’s what you’re worried about. You can ride back with Jeb in the morning.”

Without waiting for him to answer, she mounted and rode off without looking back.

JESSIE didn’t know what first alerted her to the other three riders. They were too far away for their horses to be heard, but she sensed them somehow. A little later, she saw them. The hairs on the back of her neck tingled as she realized how close she was to home and that the three riders were racing away from her ranch.

It was the fact that they weren’t on the main track to town that worried Jessie, as if they didn’t want to run into anyone. She didn’t think twice about veering Blackstar off the path to follow them. She didn’t stop to wonder if Chase would miss her, either. He had been following pretty far behind her nearly all the way. She knew he was there, but she didn’t care. This was Jessica Blair’s business, and she would see to her own interests without any help from an interfering husband.

With her urgency affecting Blackstar, Jessie closed the distance between her and the three riders in no time at all. They heard her. The first shot whistled past her ear and brought her own gun to hand. She got off two returning shots, still galloping furiously, before Blackstar’s reins slipped out of her other hand and she had to fight like mad to get the reins back. The men fired another shot at her, but they were running for their lives by then, and the aim was wild.

Jessie continued the chase undaunted. She saw who they were. The moonlight was bright enough for that. She was so furious, she wasn’t going to stop until she had all three dead in the dust at her feet. Thank God she had changed out of her dress and was wearing her gun. But then there was a horse behind her, and Chase was yanking her reins away.

“Are you crazy?” she shouted at him. “They’re getting away!”

“I don’t fancy seeing my wife with a broken neck,” he said as he pulled Blackstar to a stop. “You know you can’t race across terrain like this at night. Think of your horse if not yourself.”

He was right. A hole in the ground could kill a man as easily as a bullet, because it left his horse with a broken leg. But that didn’t lessen her fury. She was watching her quarry get farther and farther away.

“Damn you! It’s too late now!” she screamed at Chase.

“Tell me what happened, Jessie.”

“They shot at me. I shot back.”

“And?”

She shrugged. “I probably wounded what I aimed at.”

“Jessie, who—?”

“Bowdre’s hirelings. I saw them riding away from the ranch. By the time I got close enough to recognize them, they were shooting at me.”

“Clee and Charlie? Was Bowdre the third man?”

“I wish it were Bowdre, but it was Blue Parker! That no-good bastard!”

“Are you sure?”

“He looked right at me before he dug his spurs into his horse. I’ve known him too long to mistake him for someone else.”

“So Parker really has thrown in with them,” Chase said thoughtfully. “They must have offered him a lot of money.”

“It’s more likely spite. He was interested in me, wanted to marry me,” she explained. “After you came, he thought I was avoiding him because of you. He didn’t know I’d left the ranch those two times to go north. When I ran into him one day, he accused me of throwing him over for you. I told him it wasn’t true, but he didn’t believe me. He’s just like my father, a man who feels he’s got to avenge himself for any wrong.”

“What do you think they were up to?” Chase asked.

Jessie caught her breath. Her anger had overcome her fears.

“Let’s get to the ranch,” she cried, turning Blackstar around. “I’m almost afraid to guess what they’ve done.”

Baldy found them just as they got back to the trail leading to the valley. He had been on his way to town to look for them. When he finished talking, Jessie felt numb. She had thought herding the cattle together had been the answer, but all she had done was make it easy for them to be shot. Nearly half the herd lay dead or dying around the campsite. Ramsey was still unconscious from a blow to the head, and the rest of the herd had been stampeded right toward the poisoned waterhole. Baldy had gotten back to camp in time to see the three men riding off and to assess the damage. A man who had worked with cattle all his life, he was in tears from the waste he had seen.

No sooner had Baldy finished talking than Jessie saw the orange glow over the rise that shielded the valley. Chase saw it a second later. A deep animal sound escaped from Jessie. She spurred Blackstar on, and Chase followed, afraid.

Jessie rode no farther than the top of the rise that looked down on the ranch house. The glow from the fire lit her face, revealing such a depth of anguish it tore Chase’s heart.

Every building on the ranch was consumed by flames.

TWO weeks had come and gone since the fire, two weeks Jessie couldn’t remember. She was in Chicago at her mother’s mansion. She didn’t remember anything of the trip there, didn’t remember anything at all.

But Jessie was no longer sleepwalking. She swung around to face her mother, her eyes alive for the first time in two weeks. “How dare he leave me? I’m not an old piece of baggage he can throw away and forget about!”

“Jessica, you haven’t been listening,” Rachel said calmly.

Jessie continued to pace the richly carpeted floor of her mother’s room. “I’ve been listening. I couldn’t believe it when I woke today and it dawned on me what you’d told me yesterday. It was yesterday, wasn’t it?” She didn’t wait for an answer. “Well, I won’t stand for it. He can’t just dump me on your doorstep. I’m his responsibility, not yours.”

“In the first place, Jessica, Chase didn’t dump you here. You’ve been here a week, and he’s been by your side night and day. In the second place, he’s not deserting you. He’ll be back before the baby is born, I’m sure.”

“I don’t believe it. He won’t come back. He’ll find his father and decide to stay in Spain. Why should he come back? He didn’t want to marry me. He only did it so the baby wouldn’t be a bastard.”

“There were other reasons, Jessica, and you know it.”

“Then why isn’t he here? How could he leave me the way I was?”

“You didn’t even know he was here, darling,” Rachel explained gently. “You have only responded to me, to my voice, in all this time. You weren’t aware of anything. And there was no telling how long you would be that way. Your apathy could have gone on for months, but you were in no danger. So since Chase couldn’t do anything for you, anyway, he thought it best to get the trip to Spain over with now. Why, if he hadn’t left, you would probably still be living in your cocoon. Hearing that he left is what brought you out of that state.”

“That is beside the point,” Jessie said stubbornly. “He has still left me here for you to support. Now that I have nothing—nothing of my own.” She choked up for a moment, but then her eyes lit up again. “That’s why he left me! Because I’m penniless! He won’t get away with it!”

“Honestly, Jessica, you’re not being at all sensible. Chase didn’t marry you for your money. And you’re certainly no burden to me. Frankly, I’m delighted you’ll be with me during your pregnancy. I’ll be able to help you. Would you deny me this chance to mother you?”

“I don’t need mothering, Mother.” Jessie smiled. “I’m glad to see it’s taken me less time to call you Mother again than—” She wouldn’t get into that. “Understand, it’s not that I wouldn’t like to stay here with you. I’d like nothing better. It’s just that I can’t be dependent on you. Chase isn’t going to return.”

“You don’t know that,” Rachel insisted.

“Yes, I do. You see, I made it clear when we married that I wouldn’t live with him. I had the ranch then. I felt... I didn’t want... he’s a philanderer, Mother, ” she blurted out angrily. “I knew I couldn’t live with that. If he was going to have other women, I felt it would be better if he did his whoring far away from me, where I wouldn’t know about it.”

“I see,” Rachel said quietly.

“Do you?” Jessie asked hopefully. “Then you can understand why I have to go after him.”

“Wait a minute, Jessica.” Rachel became alarmed. “Go after him?”

“I have to,” Jessie said firmly. “He knows everything has changed for me since I told him he could live his own life. He knows I can’t support myself, not yet, anyway. If he could force me to marry him, then he can damn well take care of me now that I need him.”

“Is that the only reason you want to follow him, Jessica ?” Rachel asked softly.

“Of course,” Jessie said plainly. “What other reason could there be?”

“Because you love him.”

* * *

Because you love him. The words haunted Jessie on the train ride to New York, on the terrifying nights she spent cramped in the small cabin of the ship, on the even more frightening journey alone across Spain’s foreign landscape. Those words gave her no comfort. They caused her nothing but despair. She couldn’t love a man like Chase Summers, a man she couldn’t trust, a man who didn’t feel anything remotely resembling love. She couldn’t.

She wouldn’t think about it. She pushed the words away with thoughts, remembering how her mother had conceded at last and insisted on paying all the expenses of the trip, the frantic time they had had packing all the clothes Rachel had ordered made for her, the tearful farewell and admonishments that she was to return immediately if she couldn’t find Chase in New York before he sailed. But he had sailed the morning she arrived, and she hadn’t returned. She had bought passage on the next available ship, frightened, yet determined.

But all the books she had read and all the stories she had heard had not prepared her for the awesomeness of the ocean and travel across it. When she wasn’t frightened out of her wits, she was bored. She spent many of the endlessly lonely hours examining her vague memories of the two weeks after the fire.

There was scant recollection of a room unfamiliar to her and Chase bringing Kate before her. It seemed more like a dream, hearing Kate beg forgiveness for never telling Thomas it was she he had found with Will Phengle, hearing her confess to loving Thomas all those years, being his mistress for the year after Rachel was gone, being discarded for another because she hadn’t been able to give him the son he wanted. Kate had still loved Thomas, even after that. She had kept silent about Rachel in terror of what Thomas would do to her if he learned the truth. That was one excuse. In the end, she admitted, she hadn’t confessed because Thomas might have brought Rachel back.