“You’ll think we’re crazy, Favel.”
” No, of course not. I think it’s wonderful news. Congratulations I” She clasped her hands together and murmured: “If only you knew!”
” Well pray for a boy,” said Roc.
” It must be a boy this time—it must.”
“And what does old Charles say?”
” What do you think! He’s rapturous. He’s already thinking up names.”
” Make sure it’s a good old Cornish name, but we don’t want any more Petrocs about the place for a while.”
Morwenna said to me: ” After all these years. It does seem marvelous.
You see, we’ve always wanted a boy. “
We all went down to dinner together, and after the meal Roc proposed the health of the mother-to-be, and we all became quite hilarious.
Next day I had a talk with Morwenna, who had become more friendly, I thought; I liked her new serenity.
She told me that she was three months pregnant and had started to plan the child’s layette; and she was so certain that it was going to be a boy that I was a little afraid for her, because I realised how disappointed she would be if it should be a girl.
“You probably think that I’m behaving like a young girl about to have her first baby,” she said with a laugh. ” Well, that’s how I feel.
Charles wanted a boy so much . and so do I, and I always felt I was letting him down in some way by not producing one. “
” I’m sure he didn’t feel that.”
“Charles is such a good man. He would never show resentment. But I know he longed for a son. I’ll have to be careful nothing goes wrong.
It did about five years ago. I had a miscarriage and was very ill, and Dr. Elgin, who was here before Andrew Clement, said I shouldn’t make any more attempts . not for some time in any case. So you see how we feel. “
” Well, you must take the greatest care.”
“Of course one can take too much care. Some people think you should carry on as normally as possible for as long as possible.”
” I’m sure you’ll be all right; but suppose it should be a girl?” Her face fell.
“You’d love it just the same,” I assured her.
“People always do.”
“I should love her, but it wouldn’t be the same. I long for a boy, Favel. I can’t tell you how I long for a boy. “
” What name have you decided to give him?” I asked. ” Or haven’t you thought of that?”
” Charles is insisting that if it’s a boy we call him Ennis. It’s a name that’s been given to lots of Pendorrics. If you and Roc have a son you’ll call him Petroc. That’s the custom: the eldest son of the eldest son. But Ennis is as Cornish as Petroc. It’s rather charming, don’t you think?”
” Ennis,” I repeated.
She was smiling, and the intensity of her expression disturbed me. ” He’s certain to be Ennis,” she went on.
I tamed to the book of baby patterns which was lying on her lap and expressed more interest in it than I really felt.
So even Morwenna’s news added to my uneasiness. Ennis was a family name; and the boy on the moor had the looks as well as the name; Morwenna had taken Rachel away and Roc had been at hand to help make arrangements; he had visited them during their sojourn abroad, and Deborah had been afraid that Roc was going to marry Rachel. I thought I was controlling my suspicions, but I couldn’t hide them from Roc.
One day he announced that he was going to take me out for the day. I mustn’t imagine I knew Cornwall just because I had seen our little corner; he was going to take me farther afield. There was an autumnal mist in the air when we left Pendorric in the Daimler, but Roc assured me that it was only the pride of the morning; the sun would break through before long; and he was right. We drove on to the moor, and then turned northward and stopped at a country hotel for lunch.
It was over this meal that I realised Roc had brought me out to talk seriously to me.
” Now,” he said, filling my glass with Chablis, ” let’s have it.”
“Have what?”
” What’s on your mind?”
“On my mind?”
” Darling, innocence, in this case, is unbecoming. You know perfectly well what I mean. You’ve been looking at me for the last week or so as though you’re wondering whether I’m Bluebeard and you’re my ninth wife.”
” Well, Roc,” I replied, ” although you’re my husband and we’ve been married quite a few months, I don’t always feel I know you very well.”
” Am I one of those people who don’t improve on acquaintance?” As usual he caught me up in his mood; and I was already beginning to feel gay and that my suspicions were rather foolish. ” You remain .. mysterious,” I told him.
” And it’s time you began to clear up the mysteries, you’re thinking?”
“As you’re my husband I don’t think there should be secrets between us.”
He gave me that disarming smile which always touched me deeply. ” Nor do I. I know what’s disturbing you. You discovered that I haven’t lived the life of a monk before my marriage. You’re right in that. But you don’t want details of every little peccadillo, do you?”
” No,” I told him, ” not every one. Only the important ones.”
” But when I met you I realised that nothing that had happened to me before was of the slightest significance.”
” And you haven’t taken up the old way of life since you married me?”
“I can assure you that I have been faithful to you in thought and deed. There! Satisfied?”
” Yes, but …”
“So you’re not?”
“There are people who seem to regard you in a certain way and I wondered whether they realise that any relationship which existed between you is now … merely friendship.”
” I know. You’re thinking of Althea.”
“Well?”
” When she first came here to look after your grandfather I thought her the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. We became friends. The family was always urging me to marry. Morwenna had been married for years and they all implied that it was my duty to marry, but I had never felt that I wanted to settle down with any woman.”
” Until you met Althea Grey?”
” I hadn’t actually come to that conclusion. But shall we say the idea occurred to me as a possibility.”
” And then my grandfather asked you to come and have a look at me, and you thought I was the better proposition?”
” That sounds a little like your grandfather. There was no question of ‘propositions.” I had already decided that I did not want to marry Althea Grey, before your grandfather suggested I should come out and look at you. And when I did see you, it happened. Just like that. You were the only one from then on. “
” Althea couldn’t have been very pleased.”
He lifted his shoulders. ” It takes two to make a marriage.”
” I begin to understand. You must have come very near to being engaged to Althea Grey before you changed your mind. And what about Dinah Bond?”
” What about Dinah? She assisted in the education of most young men in the district.”
” I see. Not serious?”
” Absolutely not.”
“And Rachel Bective?”
“Never!” he said almost fiercely. He filled my glass.
“Catechism over?” he asked.
“Favel, I’m beginning to wonder whether you aren’t somewhat jealous.”
” I don’t think I should be jealous … without reason.”
” Well, now you know there is no reason.”
” Roc …” I hesitated, and he urged me to go on. ” That boy I saw at Bedivere House …” “Well?”
” He’s so like the Pendorrics.”
” I know; you told me before. You’re not imagining that he’s the living evidence of my sinful past, Favel!”
” Well, I did wonder who he was.”
“Do you know, darling, you haven’t enough to do. At the week-end I want to go out to one of the properties on the north coast. Come with me. We’ll be away a couple of nights.”
” That will be lovely.”
” Something else on your mind?” he asked.
” So many things are not clear. In fact when I go back to the first time I saw you … it seems to me that that was when everything began to change.”
” Well, obviously things couldn’t be the same for either of us after we’d met. We were swept off our feet.”
“No, Roc. I didn’t mean that. Even my father seemed to change.” He looked grave suddenly; and then he seemed to come to a decision.
“There are certain things you didn’t know about your father. Favel.”
” Things didn’t know.”p>
‘ Things he kept from you. “
” But he didn’t. He always confided in me. We were so close … my mother, he and I.”
Roc shook his head.
“For one thing, my dear, he didn’t tell you that he had written to your grandfather.”
I had to agree that this was so.
” Why do you think he wrote to your grandfather?”
” Because he thought it was time we met, I suppose.”
” Why should he think that was the time when for nineteen years he hadn’t considered it necessary? I didn’t want to tell you, Favel. In fact, W made up my mind not to … for years. I was going to wait until you were fifty.
A nice cosy grandmother with the little ones playing at your knee.
Then it would have seemed too far away to be painful. But I’ve come to the conclusion—in the last half-hour fhat there shouldn’t be secrets between us. “
” I’m certain there shouldn’t be. Please tell me what you know about my father.”
” He wrote to your grandfather because he was ill.”
“I’ll? In what way?”
” He had caught your mother’s disease through being with her constantly. She wouldn’t go away from him, nor he from her; they wanted to pretend that there was nothing wrong. So they stayed together and he was her only muse until she was so very ill. He told me that if she had gone away she might have lived a little longer. But she didn’t want to live like that.”
” And he too…. But I was never told.”
” He didn’t want you to know. He was very anxious about you. So he wrote to your grandfather telling him of your existence. He hoped that your grandfather would ask you to Cornwall. He himself would have stayed in Capri; and when he became really ill you wouldn’t have been there.”
” But he could have had attention. He could have gone to a sanatorium.”
” That’s what I told him. That’s what I believed he would do.”
” He told you all this … and not his own daughter t”
” My darling, the circumstances were unusual. He knew of me, and as soon as I turned up at the studio he knew why I had come. It would have been too much of a coincidence for a Pendorric to arrive only a month or so after he had sent off his letter to Polhorgan. Besides, he knew your grandfather’s methods. So he guessed at once I had been sent to look round.”
” You told him, I suppose.”
” I had been asked by Lord Polhorgan not to, but it was impossible to hide it from your father. However, we agreed that we would say nothing to you, and that I should write and tell him what I had seen; then he would presumably write to his granddaughter and invite her to England.
That was what your father hoped. But, as you know, we met . and that was enough for us. “
” And all the time he was so ill…”
” He knew that he was on the point of becoming very ill. So he was delighted when we said we were going to get married.”
” You don’t think that he was made a little uneasy by it?”
“Why should he be?”
” You knew that I was the granddaughter of a millionaire.” Roc laughed. ” Don’t forget he’d had some experience of your grandfather.
The fact that you were his granddaughter didn’t mean that you would inherit his fortune. He might have taken an acute dislike to you, and me as his son-in-law, in which case you would have been cut off with a shilling. “
No, your father was delighted. He knew I’d take care of you; and I fancy he was happier to think of you in my care than in your grandfather’s. “
” I thought he was worried about something … just before he died. I thought he was uneasy … about us. What really happened on the day when you went down to bathe?”
” Favel, I think I know why your father died.”
“Why .. he died?”
” He died because he no longer wished to live.”
“You mean …?”
” I believe he wanted a quick way out, and found it. We went down to the beach together. It was getting late, you remember. There were few people about; they were all having lunch behind the sun blinds; soon they would be deep in the siesta. When we reached the beach he said to me: You know you’d rather be with Favel.” I couldn’t deny it. Go back,” he said, leave me. I would rather go in alone.” Then he looked at me very solemnly and said: I’m glad you married her. Take care of her. “” ” You’re suggesting that he deliberately swam out to sea and had no intention of coming back?”
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