C. Brown - Compromising

I couldn’t have been more pissed. A desk bitch? Gunny Chavez always seemed so level-headed, so unless this assignment was coming from O’Hara, Gunny Chavez was about to be categorized right along with him. “Was this your decision, Gunny?”

“No, I take my orders from First Sergeant.”

I sat quietly, stewing on the inside. It seemed every which way that I turned First Sergeant O’Hara was doing something to make my life a living fucking nightmare.

“Look, Alex. Fraternizing, as you already know, carries a heavy burden. I don’t pretend to know what I would do if I were in your shoes, but First Sergeant is pissed. And if anything, I would try and lay low, do what’s asked of you, and ride it out. I’ll do whatever I can to try and help you.”

“I always do what’s asked of me, Gunny, and I’m ready to take my consequences. So whatever happens, happens.”

He rubbed his hand over his mouth, looking over to me like I had somehow lost my fucking mind with no way of getting it back. “All right. Well, you’re to report to Admin. Stay out of trouble and ride it out.”

“You’ve got my word.”

I tapped the table then stood and walked out of the building. My heart stopped as I looked down the corridor and watched as the influx of students stood outside with the instructors, practicing for graduation. As much as I had gained by winning over Cassie, this part of my life was a painful loss. Not being able to see my class through to the end was a slap in the fucking face—one that stung badly.

“Hey, Alex, I heard about Pfc. Bennett. Glad to hear she’s okay.”

I was ambushed by Castillo as I was about to enter the Admin office. Not only was pushing papers not up my alley, but working in close proximity to her was just another reason to hate life at the moment. I couldn’t be sure that she wasn’t the loose lips who’d spilled the beans to O’Hara.

“Pfc. Bennett is just fine.”

I grabbed the door handle and turned, but she stepped closer and placed her hand on the door. “I know shit went down with us, Alex, but I’m not cold hearted. I was mortified when I heard what had happened to her, and I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.”

“Well, thank you, but like I said, she’s fine.”

“And what about you? You can’t be fine with all of this.”

I turned and looked at her, ready to tell her to piss off, but once again finding the strength to refrain. “I’m just fine, Leti. I knew what was at stake, and I carried through. Now I’m dealing with the fallout, and I’m okay with that. If you’d excuse me, I need to check in so that I can get to work.”

She placed her hand on my arm, keeping me from making my way inside. “I’m worried about you, Alex. First Sergeant O’Hara pressed us hard when he questioned us. I don’t think he’s going to let up on you.”

“Leti, let me explain one thing to you. The only thing that matters right now is Cassie and her well-being. As long as she is doing better, I don’t really see a reason to worry about the negatives. Now if you’d excuse me, I have a fucking boring, paper-pushing work day to get started on.”

I removed her hand from my arm, then opened the door and made my way inside. The Admin Chief greeted me, then took me to a filing area where a mountain of files were waiting to be filed away. “Have at it, Sergeant. Holler if you need me,” Gunny Rawls said before leaving me to the most boring thing that they could have assigned me to.

This was worse than sitting in my barracks room—my prison cell. At least there I didn’t have watchful, prying eyes, looking and judging. And I knew that some stupid motherfucker was just waiting for the opportunity to ask me questions that were sure to set me off. No one was genuinely concerned about Cassie; they just wanted in on the breaking scandal that was unfolding before their eyes. I needed to get lost in this idiot’s job and keep to myself. Making my way back to Cassie was the only thing on my mind, and if I had to avoid other living souls to make sure that happened, I was hell bent on doing it.

Getting out of the hospital had become my focal point. I hated the constant back and forth from the nursing staff, the vital checks, and the horrendous food. But most of all, two things bothered me most: my mother’s impromptu visit and missing Alex.

It felt surreal to know that with one word I had forever changed my life with Alex. But that change was certainly for the better. Six weeks before, I would never have imagined that my life would have shifted so drastically, but it had, and I couldn’t be more thankful. But, of course, his ongoing problems with the Marine Corps weighed heavily on me.

Was it honorable that Alex had basically given everything up for me?

Absolutely.

But on the same token, I didn’t take what he had done and what he had given up for me lightly. This was six years, a promotion, and a career down the tubes because of our attraction.

It was undeniable and fierce.

It was painful at times and pleasurable at others.

It was everything that I had always wanted and then some. Alex Cruz was more than a lover. He was a protector, a friend, a confidant, and soon he would be my husband.

But before we could get to our happily ever after, we had some murky waters to wade through, and the first order of business was my mother. I was at a complete loss as to why she had come to my side, only to berate me and try to make me feel like a piece of shit. Prior to joining the Corps, and certainly before Alex, her words would have worked on me. I would have caved under the pressure of her venomous tongue, and either allowed her to tear me down, or fought back.

Now, all I wanted was for her to just leave me alone. I didn’t want to entertain her. I didn’t want to have anything to do with her. And I made my wishes known shortly after Alex was led out by Gunny Chavez and Gunny Bokowski.

++++

“What are you doing here?” I asked, trying to focus through tear streaked eyes.

My mother turned her hateful gaze on me, smiling as she took in my anguish.

“I told you. The hospital called. I knew whatever it was, it was something you had done, and whether you meant for it to happen or not, I had to come.”

“Excuse me? You didn’t know whether I meant for it to happen? You can’t decide if I wanted an angry, hateful guy to beat my ass and come close to raping me? What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“Cassie, you and I both know that you like to play the victim card. And by the looks of things, it seems you’ve already gotten your boyfriend hook, line, and sinker. The way he looked at me with such contempt in his eyes tells me that you’ve laid it on thick where I’m concerned.” She plopped down in a chair. “I don’t really give a rat’s ass. I think the predicament that you’ve found yourself in speaks for itself.”

“You are a piece of work. You spent six hours on the road for what? To come here and try and tear me down. Well, you’ve wasted your time. Why don’t you go and find a liquor store and wash down your pharmacy of pills? I’m surprised you aren’t shaking from withdrawals right now.”

Her hatred flared up in her eyes again, and she was just about to say something else when there was a knock on the door.

“Hey! How are you doing?” Dalton cheerfully asked, before noticing my expression and dropping his own smile. “Did I come at a bad time?”

I rolled my eyes. “No, you came at just the right time. Emmalyn was just leaving.”

“Does your boyfriend know about this one? Are you opening your legs for him too?”

“Whoa! Who are you?”

“This is my sorry excuse for a mother, and she was just about to walk her ass right back out of my life.”

“Emmalyn Bennett,” she said, reaching her hand out for his. Dalton’s eyes drifted down to her hand, but he never reached his out to meet her. “Please tell me you aren’t fucking my daughter too? I’d like to think that I raised her with some sort of decency.”

“You didn’t fucking raise me. I raised myself. A doped up mom can’t raise anything or anyone.”

“Okay, It’s best for you to leave,” Dalton said. His skin flushed crimson red as his eyes angrily pinned her down.

My mom took a long look at him, then over to me. She let out a sinister laugh. “I’ll be staying at the Best Western right off base. I’ll see you when they finally let you out of here.” She brushed past Dalton, then turned around. “It’s hard to be sympathetic when you just can’t seem to learn from your mistakes, Cassie Lynn.”

“I have learned from them. Now go ahead and walk out that door because I don’t ever need you to come for me ever again.”

++++

Dalton stayed with me that night, begging the nursing staff to allow him to crash in the chairs. He said he couldn’t…that he wouldn’t leave me after having to deal with such a heinous monster, but my mother’s poison hadn’t come as a shock to me. She reserved a special amount of bitterness where I was concerned, but the way she was so open and free flowing with it had definitely surprised Dalton.

The next day was a lazy one. Although I was feeling much better, my wrists were still quite sore as was my face. Sleep was often interrupted by the nurses, but the images of what Allen had done to me haunted me at night, adding to my insomnia. The eerie sound of his voice as he viciously attacked me played over and over, leaving me gasping for breath.

I was lucky to have escaped that assault with only the injuries that I had. Had Allen succeeded with his warped plans, my soul would have been shattered, and I wouldn’t have been any good to myself or anyone else. The thought of his cock inside of me made my skin crawl, and I found myself desperately seeking anything else to make it go away.

Of course, as the true masochist that I found myself turning into, my mind traded one troublesome thought for another. When I was reliving the nightmare that Allen had inflicted on me, I was worried sick about Alex and how he was holding up. First Sergeant O’Hara seemed to be going for the jugular, and he didn’t show any signs of relenting. Our communication had been cut—Alex was placed on barracks restriction, and I was left in the hospital. As stir crazy as I was beginning to get, I could only imagine what he was going through.

Alex loved hard, and he had sacrificed himself, but I was afraid that no amount of preparing could have gotten him ready for the battle that he was about to fight. Our love had proven resilient in the throes of some testing times. I wasn’t concerned with if we’d make it. I knew that after everything we had been through we were destined to be together, but I needed to know at what cost.

The fear of Alex and me being split apart still loomed over my head. First Sergeant O’Hara said that I would be assigned at Twenynine so that I could participate in the investigation into the Allen, but that didn’t mean Alex was safe. O’Hara could pull a whole host of things, or he could leave him alone. After what I had witnessed, the latter seem highly unlikely.

So here I sat, in the hospital bed, yearning to get out, and get Alex back by my side. I wanted to snuggle up next to him and let him massage my head while I fell asleep. I wanted to smell that husky male scent that lingered on his caramel skin. I wanted to stare into his beautiful, honey hued eyes. Sadly, I couldn’t do any of that, and I wasn’t quite sure when I would ever have that option again.

Dalton had brought me some magazines from the seven-day store, leaving me with something to try and occupy my time. I had just gone through the third one when there was a forceful knock on the door. I looked up to find First Sergeant O’Hara striding into the room with a manila folder in his hand and a Staff Sergeant by his side. His dark, beady eyes locked with mine, draining the life from my body. His face…his demeanor had a way of killing me softly, and here he was doing just that.

“Good morning, Pfc. Bennett. How are you feeling today?” he asked, in a cold, dry tone.

“I’m feeling much better, First Sergeant.”

He looked around the room, then focused his laser sharp gaze on me. His appearance made me wholly uncomfortable, and chills shot down my spine as goosebumps sprouted all over my arms.

“I’m going to be brief because I have quite a few pressing matters to take care of. I asked you before if there were anything that you wanted to tell me, and you had nothing to say, but I’m positive you were protecting Sergeant Cruz. You may be new to the Corps, Pfc. Bennett, but you know and understand the rules. Fraternizing is a highly punishable offense and undermines the fabric of our schoolhouse. Cruz is strung high and will fall hard, but you don’t have to go with him.”