Taylor was still firmly entrenched in a death stare with Adriana, neither of them willing to look away. She finally rolled her eyes, then looked over to me. “I ran into your mom about a week ago and we got to talking. I was telling her how excited I was to have talked to you and congratulated her on becoming a grandma. I had no idea you were still locked in this childish shit. She had no idea you were pregnant, Cassie. It’s been years. I thought you’d let all of that go.”

“It hasn’t been years, Taylor. She’s kept up her shit ever since the day you left.”

“Who gives a shit about all of this, Blondie? Get their asses off my property before our entire Christmas is ruined.”

“You know what? You’re a supreme dick!” Taylor yelled, now drawing Riley and Nat to the doorway.

“You better shut your fucking mouth before I shut it for you!” Adriana yelled back. She slowly stalked towards Taylor, almost reaching her, but coming up short as Riley raced out of the house, grabbed her and pulled her back.

“Fuck this chick, Riley! She wants to run her mouth—”

“Adriana, Abel is in there with your grandma. You’re not doing anything right now.”

“Nat, take Cassie back inside,” Alex barked.

Nat jumped, racing over to where I stood. My mom looked at me, mixed emotion etched in her haggard face. I thought I saw a trace of sadness, but she was high as hell, so her expression could be misleading.

“This is what you’ve become, Cassie. Even if I am as bad as your boyfriend claims, you were stronger then than you are now.”

“Whoa!” Nat shrieked, surprising filling her voice. “Is this your mom, Cassie?” Her horrified expression said everything.

Alex stormed over to where she stood, standing erect and intimidating. “Unfortunately, yes,” he gruffly replied. “And she’s getting ready to take Cassie’s loud mouth friend and get the fuck out of here.”

Emmalyn laughed, the same mocking and condescending laugh that I had heard so many times before. It stirred up some very bad memories, making me shudder with the thought alone of what she was capable of.

“Mom, I think it’s best that you go.”

“Cass!” Taylor shrieked. “What’s gotten into you? Your mom made the effort. Meet her half way.”

“That fucking ship has sailed,” Alex threw in. “Let’s go, Cassie.”

“Cassie!” my mom called out.

I looked back at her, a piece of me surprisingly feeling something for her. I took in her deep and gaunt face, the dark circles around her eyes, her scraggly hair and immediately pinpointed the feeling.

It was sorrow.

I felt sorry for her and what she had become, but I didn’t know why. She had been this same sad, pathetic woman for years, and only now that she was standing before me looking lost and helpless did I finally feel for her.

“Nat, take Cassie inside. She doesn’t need this shit right now.” Nat took me by the arm and led me back towards the house.

“Cassie, grow a pair!” Taylor shouted. “This is your mom. Put the bullshit aside and let your baby have a grandmother.”

“Fuck you! She’s got everything she needs here. And don’t worry about my baby. She’ll have everything she fucking needs. Now get the fuck out of here before I remove you for fucking trespassing,” Alex yelled, clearly losing his patience.

Tears threatened and burned, but I never let them fall. I stopped Nat short of the door, then turned and went back to Alex to calm him down before he did something we’d all regret.

“Stop, Alex. Just stop.”

His eyebrows furrowed as he took me in, confusion spread deep and wide throughout his beautiful face. I loved his intensity and love for me, but I hated seeing him this way. It was crazy and unnecessary, even if he were trying to protect me.

“What the hell is wrong with you, Blondie? Go inside.”

“No! We’re not at work, so you don’t get to order me around.”

“Glad to see you grow some, Cass.”

I turned my attention away from Alex and over to Taylor. “You don’t have anything to say right now. The least you could have done was given me a heads up. You could have called or texted… anything. You know what I’ve been through with her.”

“Cass—”

“No, it hasn’t gotten better, Taylor. In fact, when I was lying in a damn hospital bed, my dear sweet mom here made sure to take her opportunity to take more shots at me.” My words were laced with a deep level of sarcasm.

“Cassie, she needs you.”

“That’s funny because I needed her for years, but she turned her back on me.”

“You’re grown now, Cassie. Grow up. She wants to have a place in your baby’s life.”

That statement struck a chord.

“Oh that’s not fucking happening,” Alex growled.

“Why are you speaking for her?” I asked, growing more and more annoyed with Taylor. I’d been so excited to have a piece of her back in my life, but that was quickly dwindling.

“Because someone has to. Your mom is sick, and you are acting like a little bitch. Have a heart, Cass.”

“Go fucking haze yourself!” Alex roared as he stepped between me and Taylor. He took my hand and pulled me behind him, holding me firmly in place. “This is the last I’m going to tell you to go before I lose my fucking mind on you and destroy your ass right where you stand. Get the fuck off my property, and take that pill popper with you.”

Taylor shook her head as she glared at Alex and me. She looked at mom, who seemed unfazed, the same emotionless stare shrouding her face. “You’ve changed, Cassie, and not for the better.”

“The same goes for you, Taylor. Same goes for you.”

“Time to go, bitch!” Nat yelled, stomping over in our direction. She took Taylor by the arm, but she drew a ferocious arm swing and hit Nat in the head.

“Oh fuck no!” she yelled, pushing Taylor forcefully.

Riley let go of Adriana, then charged toward the two girls. My heart began to race as I watched what was about to become a serious cat fight. Nat was small and scrappy, but Taylor was no pushover. Luckily, Riley got to Nat before it escalated any further.

“This is all your fucking doing!” Alex yelled, pointing at my mom. “Go finish your fucking pills and get the hell out of here. Now!”

He took me by the hand and pulled me inside the house. Guadalupe sat on the couch with Abel, a horrified expression filling her face. Shortly after, Nat, Adriana, and Riley came storming through the door. We all stood in the living room for a second, no one saying a word as the silence enveloped us in an awkward moment.

“Lo siento, Abuelita,” Alex finally spoke. He had visibly calmed down and showed nothing but compassion when speaking to his grandmother. “That was Cassie’s mom here to start trouble.”

“Too much temper, Alejandro. You have a baby coming. You need to calm down.”

“I know,” he conceded.

“Come, Abuelita. Grab Abel’s toys over there, please,” Adriana chimed in.

“Where are you going?” Alex asked, his face frowning once again.

Adriana paused for a second, and I immediately knew her answer. “Over to Brandon’s. We want to spend some time together today, and you won’t let him over here.”

“You can’t see his punk ass tomorrow? We’re supposed to be spending this day as a family, Adriana. Family!”

“Don’t give me any shit, Alex. If you weren’t such a hard ass, you would have allowed him over here. News flash, we’re together, and he’s not going anywhere.”

“Where’s your loyalty?”

“On full display. I showed it outside in case you forgot. Where is your compassion? Where is your civility?”

Alex’s eyes darkened as he stood glaring at his sister. “Go see your punk ass boyfriend, Adriana,” he dismissively grumbled.

Adriana huffed but didn’t reply. It was probably for the best. She hugged me and whispered, “Please try and calm his ass down.”

I nodded, then hugged Abel and Guadalupe and saw them out the door.

Nat and Riley began clearing the dishes from dinner. I joined them, making small talk as Alex sat on the couch with his head in his hands. He was fiercely antagonistic today, and while he was normally up for confrontation, I knew that there was something more going on with him, and this sight proved it.

“Hey, guys, do you mind if I have some alone time with Alex?”

Nat and Riley immediately looked in his direction and nodded simultaneously. I loved that they knew us so well that we could communicate with little or no words being spoken. They just got us.

They grabbed their coats, then headed out of the house, leaving us alone. I walked over to the living room, stopping just before Alex, then cleared my throat. He looked up, his handsome face looking exhausted.

“May I help you, Blondie?”

“Yeah, I’d like to know what the hell has gotten into you.”

He looked away, then back to me, sighing heavily. “I really don’t know what you want me to say.”

“How about telling me what’s wrong with you?”

“Are you really questioning me about my reaction to your mother? Your cold, spineless fucking mother? She’s lucky I didn’t act on what was going through my head.”

“I don’t even want to know what was going through your head. Her being here pissed me off, too.”

He threw his hands up into the air, all but dismissing my questioning. “Then why are you giving me shit about it?”

“Because, Alex. Because you go from zero to a hundred in the blink of an eye. I didn’t want her here either, but almost punching everyone in sight isn’t the way to handle it.”

“Well, standing there and letting people talk shit to you isn’t the way to handle it, either.”

The condescending nature of his voice further irritated me. “Well, in case you forgot, I’m pregnant, Alex. I can’t get into fights with people the way you think you can.”

“I’m well aware, Cassie. I fucking put our little girl in there.”

I paused. This was the second time he had mentioned a girl, when obviously, we didn’t know what we were having. “We don’t know what we’re having yet, Alex. You really want a little girl?”

He looked up at me, nostrils flaring and lips pursed tightly. “I just feel it. I feel as if you’re carrying my daughter.”

There was a subdued tone to his voice as if a sudden rush of sadness had overcome him. Resting my hand on his leg, I took a seat next to him on the couch, then lowered my head to try and come eye to eye with him.

“There’s something more to this. Why don’t you tell me what it is?”

“It’s not the time, Cassie. It’s Christmas, and we’re engaged. We should be celebrating.”

“Well, that’s been shot to hell, so speak up. Tell me what’s on your mind. I hate that my mom showed up here. Last thing I wanted.”

His eyes flashed over to me, life perking up in them as we finally connected. “I feel like a fucking dick, but your mom doesn’t deserve a second of your time, Cassie. She’s a rotten fucking individual and deserves nothing. You shouldn’t accommodate her ass.”

“I never said I was giving her anything, Alex.”

“But you were there, hearing her out…”

“No. I asked questions.”

“It doesn’t matter. The longer she stood there, the more I wished the roles were reversed. Fuck your mom.” There was a hint of sadness in his voice.

“Alex, look at me.” He didn’t look up right away. “Look at me! What do you mean you wanted the roles reversed?”

Alex stood abruptly, briskly running his hand over his face and head. “Cassie. It’s bad enough that I have no regrets for even thinking it. Don’t make me say it.”

“I can’t read your mind, Alex.”

“Your fucking mom. I wish she was fucking gone, and my mom were still here. Your mom celebrated when she lost a grandchild, but my mom squeezed our hands and showed her approval in her last fucking moments on earth. Your mom has done nothing but tear you down, but mine would want nothing more than to build us up. I hate your fucking mom because she’s a rotten person.

“Our daughter was robbed of a phenomenal grandmother and is stuck with a piece of shit one. I see nothing when I look at the woman. I wish the fucking roles were reversed, Cassie. Your mom should be in a fucking box in the ground.”

Shock overtook me. I had no idea that Alex had been feeling all of that, and his body language as he finished speaking broke my heart, making me realize that he was still hurting deeply. I reached out, taking his arm and pulling him to me. We stood in silence, the only sounds coming from Alex breathing hard into the hollow where my shoulder met my neck. I loved this man so much, and yet I had no clue what to do to ease his pain, to make him feel whole again.