"Let's start at the beginning," Crystal said, leaning her elbows on the table and visibly relaxing. "All right, so you got out on the bus" Despite her attention being given to her long lost sister, Crystal was nonetheless fully aware of Laura leaving the room. A quick glance into the living room showed channels rapidly flicking before the writer settled on a football game. The next two hours were more emotionally draining than her most intense therapy sessions, an emotional roller coaster as the two sisters learned of each other's life since their tragic separation.

Laura looked up as she heard the phone being set on its base. Crystal's red rimmed eyes were puffy, a crumpled up tissue wiping the fresh tears that had fallen from them.

"Come here," the writer said softly, shutting off the television and shifting sideways on the couch. When Crystal sat down, Laura moved closer, putting her left arm around the younger woman's shoulders and pulling her close. "How are you feeling?" She felt Crystal shrug before answering.

"I dunno," Crystal said. "So much happened just after I left. If I had stuck around, things would have been so different."

"You can't go back and change things," Laura said, her fingers gently stroking Crystal's upper arm.

"My father had a heart attack about two months after I left," Crystal said, leaning her head against Laura's upper chest. "And Patty came home four months after that. If I had just stuck around for six more months I wouldn't have had to run away at all."

Laura took a deep breath, thinking of what she knew of Crystal's life as a runaway.

"She came home pregnant," the woman in her arms continued. "Patty could have really used me then and I wasn't there. Mom stopped drinking and found a job. Patty says Mom's so different from when we were kids. She watches Jessica and Thomas when Patty's at work." Crystal shook her head. "I can't believe it. Mom stopped drinking, Patty came home, I have a niece and nephew and I've missed it all!"

"Hon, you couldn't have known what was going on," Laura said. "You said your folks didn't have a telephone back then." "I just never thought Patty would come home much less that the bastard would die so soon," Crystal said. "I should have toughed it out. I should have been stronger."

"Hey." Cupping Crystal's chin with her fingers, Laura looked into sad eyes. "You can't beat yourself up for what you should or shouldn't have done a lifetime ago. You had no way of knowing what would happen. You did what you had to do to get away from that monster. When the people that are supposed to protect you are the ones hurting you, what else could you have done?"

"But"

"No buts," Laura said firmly, relaxing her hold on Crystal's chin and letting her fingertips trace the throat before withdrawing. "You had to get away from your father." She waited for the reluctant nod before continuing. "The important thing now is that you have Patty back. When are you going to visit her?"

"Saturday," Crystal said, resting her head against Laura's willing shoulder. "It's easier for me to go see her than it is for her to pack the kids up in the car and make the trip out here." She paused for a moment before asking "Are you going to come with me to meet her?" Laura, who had been momentarily distracted by the scent of golden hair beneath her nose, tilted her head to look at her companion. "Do you want me to?"

Crystal nodded. "Yeah."

"If you want me there," Laura said quietly, "I'll be there." Without thought, she let her fingers gently brush back and forth over the younger woman's shoulder, a gentle smile crossing her lips. "It should be interesting introducing me."

Crystal smiled back. "I'll just tell them you're a lesbian mystery writer and we live together. I'm sure that'll go over well."

"You have a wicked streak in you, hon," Laura said. "You'll make them think we're lovers."

To her surprise, Crystal merely shrugged nonchalantly. "So what?" the blonde said. "Patty wouldn't care, I'm sure of it." She sat up and looked at Laura. "Would it bother you?" she asked in all seriousness. "If people thought we were lovers?"

Laura took a deep breath, hoping the feelings she usually kept so guarded weren't evident on her face. "No, it wouldn't bother me at all. You're a beautiful woman and beneath that tough act you like to show everyone else, I know inside you're a loving and caring person. Any woman would be lucky to have that chance with you. Beside, half our friends think we're lovers anyway."

"More than half, I bet," Crystal said, relaxing against Laura's body again. "Of course I suppose the fact we do things like this " she gestured at their intimate position. " doesn't help."

"Yes but we don't hold each other like this in front of other people," the writer pointed out. "They don't see this side of our relationship." "I dunno," Crystal said quietly, her eyes focused on the dark television. "I guess it's just because we live together."

"Must be," Laura said, knowing in her heart that it was not the truth.

"Then again maybe they see something we don't."

Laura's first thought was to deny it, to fight the reality within Crystal's words but her heart refused to let her. Nodding reluctantly, the writer dared to dive into the dangerous waters. "Maybe," she said in a voice so low that at first she was not sure Crystal had even heard her but when the young woman shifted, sitting up to look deep into Laura's eyes, the writer knew her words had carried.

"Laura?"

Laura heard the unspoken questions, the fear and perhaps even anticipation in Crystal's voice. Feeling her own heart pounding within her chest, she brought her right hand up to rest against Crystal's cheek. "Sometimes I see you hurting and all I want to do is hold you in my arms and never let go." Leaning forward slightly, she kept her eyes locked with Crystal's. "Other times you're so self-destructive that I want to just shake some sense into you but I have to hold back and just hope that you'll come to me when you're ready." Laura drew her hand back, the fingertips barely grazing Crystal's lower lip. "But most of all I'm just happy to be part of your life as long as you let me because behind those thorns I'm certain there's a rose just waiting to bloom and be loved." Feeling somewhat confident that she would not be rebuked, Laura closed the remaining distance and felt the softness of Crystal's lips against hers. It was a brief, fleeting kiss but to Laura, it was perfect. "You affect me," she whispered as she pulled back, her lips tingling from the abbreviated contact.

Crystal lowered her head, looking down at her hands. "When I first moved in here, I was sure it wouldn't work out. What the hell does a drunk stripper who didn't even graduate high school have in common with a lesbian writer with a degree?" She looked up at Laura. "Not to mention you're the ultimate neat freak."

"And you're the proverbial Oscar Madison," Laura said softly, answering Crystal's smile with one of her own.

"And I'm a slob," Crystal agreed. "But somehow we managed to work it out." She lowered her head again. "I don't know when it happened. It sure as hell isn't something I'd ever think about with anyone else. At first I thought it was because I hung around with just you and your friends but it doesn't rub off like a contagious disease." She shrugged her shoulders. "I guess I stopped thinking of you as a lesbian and started thinking of you as a friend then as something more than a friend." Tilting her head up, she looked at Laura's mouth, seemingly unable to make eye contact. "You you affect me too."

"So where do we go from here?" Laura asked, using her fingers to lift Crystal's head up.

"I don't know," Crystal admitted wearily. "I feel like I'm on overload with everything that's happened today."

"I bet you are," Laura said, using her arms to pull the younger woman against her. "Relax. It's not something you have to decide right this minute." Unable to resist, she bent her head and placed a soft kiss on the top of the blonde hair. "Nothing has to change. When the time is right, you'll know it."

"Until when?" Crystal asked, her voice muffled against Laura's chest. "What if you get tired of waiting or someone better comes along? What if I can't get over the stuff in my past enough to be able to

" She let the sentence go unfinished.

"You worry too much, you know that?" Laura said in mock exasperation as she hugged the woman in her arms. She understood the unspoken implication and deep inside, the writer's heart burned with renewed anger at the man who had caused so much pain to the younger woman. "I told you, when the time is right, you'll know it. And for the record," she added in a lower voice. "I'm not looking." She felt Crystal's arms tighten around her. "And I'm not going anywhere."

"Anyone tell you you're a sweet talker?" Crystal asked, awkwardly sitting up.

"I spend a great deal of time trying to paint a picture with words," Laura said, reluctantly releasing the embrace as Crystal put some space between them. "I'm just trying to make sure you understand how I feel." Deciding not to push it, Laura changed the subject. "Now, tell me more about Patty and your niece and nephew. I'm sure you know everything about them right down to their hair color." Laura settled back to listen to Crystal talk, though the words failed to sink in as the writer's mind traveled back to replay the evening's revelations what they meant to the future.

The air was cool, enough to make Crystal forego her usual t-shirt and don a sweatshirt to go with her sweatpants before stepping onto the balcony for a late night cigarette. Her thoughts were racing far too much to think of sleep, despite being tired. Wisps of smoke rose in the air while she quietly listened to the faraway hooting of the owl and even more distant sounds of the traffic on the highway. For a brief moment, part of her wanted to be on that highway, driving as far away from the whirlwind of her life as she could. She knew for a certainty now that Laura wanted to be her lover and while it relieved Crystal on one level to know her own interest was returned, it scared her as well. Writing in her journal for two hours after retiring to her room had been of some help, allowing her to organize her thoughts and express some of her fears but it wasn't enough. Flicking ash into the night wind, Crystal sighed and thought about what tomorrow would bring.

"Can't sleep?" Laura asked before opening the sliding door and stepping onto the balcony.

"Just a lot on my mind," Crystal answered. "You know, with seeing Patty Saturday and all." Her lips curled into a small smile. "Not to mention what happened downstairs earlier."

"Do you want to talk about it?" the writer asked, pulling out a chair and sitting down.

Crystal took another drag of her cigarette before answering the question with one of her own. "Do you?"

"I think we should since neither of us is getting any sleep," Laura said.

"You know I really wish I had a drink right now," Crystal said. "Everything is just swirling around in my head and part of me wants to just run from it all." She gave a short, self-deprecating laugh. "Figures when things are going good I'd be looking for a way to screw it all up." She tamped the cigarette out in the ashtray while trying to organize her thoughts. Realizing it was a futile effort, she turned her chair to face Laura and leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees. "I don't know what the hell you see in me," she said, looking down at nothing.

"That's because you're not looking through my eyes," Laura said softly, her fingers reaching out to touch Crystal's arm. "I wish I did," she admitted. "I wish I saw whatever it is you see. Laura? Earlier, when we were on the couch?" Goosebumps rose on her arm and

Crystal knew it had nothing to do with the night wind. "When you when we kissed?" Taking a deep breath, she forced herself to look up and ask the question that had worried her all night. "Did you like it?"

"I did like it," Laura said earnestly. "You couldn't tell?"

"I thought so but, I mean 's not like I'm the first woman you've kissed." She lowered her head again. "I guess I just wasn't sure." She paused. "You didn't say." She felt Laura's hand leave hers and gentle but insistent fingers pushing her chin up.

"Crystal" Laura took a deep breath. "I liked it. Very much so."

Reaching between her legs and gripping thee.g.of the chair, Crystal scooted closer, the material of her sweatpants brushing against Laura's knee. "Can I tell you something?" she asked shyly.

"Anything."

"I

" She stopped, her insecurities taking over for the moment. The words she wanted to say just would not come. Reaching out, she took Laura's hand in hers and was pleased to feel a reassuring squeeze. "I