My chest ached knowing that Kash may indeed think I was dead. I couldn’t help but wonder how long he would have searched for me before giving up. How long he would grieve before eventually trying to move on with his life. And how long would I be here before I came to terms with the fact that I would never get out again?

Taylor’s breathing evened out, and I vowed to someday get out of this place, and get back to Kash.

I BARELY HAD TIME to sit up in the bed and see what was happening before Taylor was throwing himself in front of me and reaching into the nightstand with his free hand—his other hand was holding a gun pointing at two men who were standing just outside the doorway that led to Taylor’s bathroom.

“Don’t move,” he said in warning and pulled the second gun up so he had one aimed at each man.

“Just give us the girl, bro,” the one on our right said. Both had their arms up, but one of his started slowly inching down to his waist.

“Keep reaching for your gun, Jaime, and I’ll put two bullets in your chest.”

Jaime’s hand went back up, and both men took a step away from each other, like they were about to round both sides of the bed. Taylor was already practically sitting on my feet as he kept his guns trained on them, but my body was shaking, and I felt like he was better protection than the headboard I was sitting up against. I forced my legs to move and slowly scooted myself down the few feet on the bed until I was pressed up against his back, and gripping his shirt.

The muscles in Taylor’s back were tense and vibrating as I let my forehead fall to the point right between his shoulder blades, and prayed that if anything happened, it didn’t happen to him.

“You can’t keep her locked up with you anymore. They’re taking too long at releasing everyone, something’s gotta give. You know they stopped responding to our calls and e-mails, we need to take action; and they want her.”

“You touch her, you die. Get the fuck out,” Taylor growled.

“You’re really going to turn against us over a piece of ass? What do you think Romero will say when he finds out? You’ll be out, and you know—”

“I don’t fucking care, get the fuck out!”

I heard shuffling, and then a short scream burst from my throat when both guns went off. My ears were ringing, and although I knew they came from Taylor’s guns, I still let out a shaky breath of relief when I heard his deep voice again.

“Next time, they’re aimed at you. Get out, don’t come in here again, and don’t come near her.”

“Fuck you, you’re out. You got it? You’re out, and she will be used to get them back—we’re going!” one of them yelled, and I figured Taylor had aimed his guns at them again.

We sat quietly for a few minutes until Taylor finally broke the silence. His voice was dark and soft. “Are you okay?”

I just nodded my head into his back and tried to force my hands to loosen their hold on his shirt—they tightened instead.

“I need you to let go, Rachel, I need to go lock the doors again if they didn’t bust them, and put something in front of them so they can’t get back in.”

“Yeah, okay—yeah . . . I’m trying,” I cried out, half-frustrated that I was feeling like a child unable to make her body do what she wanted it to do, half-terrified and wondering when I’d started crying.

Taylor leaned forward to set the guns down before reaching behind him to grab for my hands. His large fingers wrapped around my shaking fists and gently began massaging them, down to my wrists and back again until they loosened their death grip on his shirt and finally let go.

We sat there for a handful of minutes—with my forehead still pressed to his back, and his hands holding on to my wrists from over his shoulders—not moving, and not saying anything until he twisted around and set my hands on the bed before releasing them.

His eyes searched my face, and his mouth opened like he was going to say something before he shut it and shook his head. “I’ll be back,” he said and got off the bed and headed into the bathroom.

When he was done locking the door and moving his workout equipment in front of the doors leading to the bathroom and hall, he grabbed the guns off the bed and put them on top of one of the nightstands. I was staring at one of the two holes above the bathroom doorframe where Taylor had shot, when his hand grabbed my chin and turned my head to face him.

“You okay?”

I nodded and swallowed through the tightening in my throat. When I opened my mouth to reassure his worried-looking eyes, nothing came out and tears clouded my vision again.

The hand holding my chin released me and grabbed around the back of my neck, bringing me into his chest so he could wrap his other arm around me. “I won’t let them get to you, Rachel. I swear I won’t.”

He held me as I cried, and when I could speak again, the questions came out all at once. “W-what is going on? Why am I here? Who were they talking about? Don’t give me your bullshit about not being able to answer! Who are you?”

When he didn’t respond for a few minutes, I thought he wouldn’t say anything at all. But with a heavy exhale that hinted at the stress he was carrying, he tightened his grip and whispered into my neck, “I’m just a guy who got caught up in a bad situation a long time ago.”

I pulled back and cradled his cheeks roughly as I pleaded, “Then get out of it! Get me out of here; you don’t have to be this guy. You’re not him. I don’t know what you did, but I know what you’ve done for me. I’ve told you, you’re not a bad person, Taylor.”

“Trent.” When I just sat there staring at him, he placed his large hands over mine and repeated, “Trent Cruz. That’s my name.”

I knew what this meant. I knew how big this was. He trusted me with that; and in giving me his name, he was letting me know again that I could trust him. As bizarre as that sounded. “You don’t like Taylor?” I asked and earned a somewhat-relieved smile from him.

“If it’s coming from you, then, yeah, I like Taylor.” Pushing me away gently, he stood from the bed and waited until I was lying down. “Go back to sleep, Rachel. It’s going to be practically impossible for them to get back in, but if they somehow do, I’ll always protect you.”

My body tensed up when he stepped away from me and was already shaking by the time he sat down next to one of the equipment benches in front of the bedroom door. I’d felt safest when Tay—Trent was in the room with me, but after waking up and realizing that two of the others had gotten in, and had guns with them, even having him in the room wasn’t enough.

I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to steady my breathing, but minutes passed and I was coming close to breaking down again, worse than I had when it had all been over. Not waiting to think about what I was doing or what it meant, since I was the captive and he was the captor, I flew out of the bed and over to where he was sitting before throwing myself onto his lap and burying my head in his chest as sobs tormented my body.

“I’m sorry,” he repeated over and over as he held me close and let me soak the front of his shirt with my tears. “I wish I could change everything, Rachel, I’m so damn sorry.”

There was nothing for me to say, I didn’t know why he’d taken me, and I knew I might never know. I also knew deep down that if he could take me away, he would do everything to make it happen. But he wasn’t, and he wouldn’t even attempt it. That told me everything—that whatever was happening was so much bigger than me being kept in this place.

When my sobs quieted, Trent gently pushed my shoulders back and spoke low, the warmth in his tone making my body shiver. “Go get back in bed, I’ll be here to protect you.”

I responded by throwing myself back at his chest and wrapping my arms around his neck. He didn’t hesitate, he just moved his legs under us and stood up, with me still in his arms, and walked us over to the bed. Laying me down on the bed, he grabbed my hands and unclasped them before placing them on top of my stomach. My hands shot out when he straightened, but he was already removing his shirt soaked with my tears, and climbed over me to the other side of the bed.

As soon as he was on his side, facing me, I curled my body up against his and pressed my head into his shoulder. It was ridiculous, but like when I was little and I felt like the monsters couldn’t get me if I was hiding under the covers, my body stopped shaking and relaxed into Trent when he pulled the comforter up over us.

I knew Jaime, the guy with him, and any of the others could still get in here; but with the comforter surrounding me, and Trent’s arms holding me close, I finally felt like the monsters couldn’t touch me.

Trent

KEEPING ONE ARM AROUND RACHEL, I brought my other hand up and ran it down my face, exhaling heavily into it when I reached my mouth. I couldn’t believe I’d fallen asleep and allowed them to get into the room before I’d woken back up. They hadn’t made a fucking sound; I’m still not even sure what woke me. They could have easily grabbed her, taken her, and I wouldn’t have known. It would have been my fault.

I couldn’t stop thinking that my reaction to Marco and Dominic tonight had been what led Jaime and Carson to break in.

My fault. All of it.

But, Jesus Christ. Rachel was asleep in my arms. The warmth of her breath on my bare chest should be insignificant, but right now it seemed like the most vital connection to this world. Her long hair tangled in the hand holding her close to me, and the heat of her body against mine was something I’d craved for months; and I felt like I was riding a high more extreme than any drug could ever give me.

The way she’d thrown herself into my arms tonight was playing in my mind on repeat; and even now with her pressed against me, I could still feel the way her head had felt buried into my neck, the way it had felt when she’d thrown her arms around me after I’d tried to push her back.

I’d known she’d been changing, but something had happened since the power had gone out tonight. The feisty Rachel I’d come to know over the last few weeks was gone. She was terrified, like she always should have been . . . but instead of retreating from me like I would expect her to, she was clinging to me. I didn’t understand it, but I wasn’t about to question it. Because nothing about my feelings had changed, even though everything about her had.

I’d already completely fallen in love with a girl who could never be mine. Only now, she was making it impossible for me to grasp ever letting her go.

13

Kash

MY HEAVY EYELIDS SLOWLY BLINKED OPEN when the warm body in my arms stirred, and I automatically tightened them around her waist. I buried my face in her hair and a lazy smile crossed my face.

“Morning, Sour Patch.”

She mumbled something unintelligible and I laughed as I moved her hair away to kiss her neck. “Where are you?” she asked suddenly as my hand made its way down her torso and stopped just at the edge of her underwear.

“Uh . . .” I forced out another laugh in an attempt to wash away the eerie feeling that hung in the air after her panicked question. “Should I be taking that as an insult, or—”

“Why aren’t you coming to find me, Kash!”

“What the hell?” I pushed away from Rachel at the same time her voice filled the entire room. But it wasn’t coming from the girl lying next to me. It was as if it were playing through speakers in the wall. Her screams and cries were all I could hear, all I could focus on. “Rachel!” I yelled and went to turn her body toward me, but the body was no longer there.

“Please! Somebody help me! Please!”

I struggled to get off the bed as a mass of Rachel’s bloody hair clung to my hands. My legs got caught in the sheets and I fell out of the bed, landing on my back. I crawled away on my hands and knees, the sheets still twisted around my legs; and gave up when her screams got to an ear-piercing level. On my knees, I pressed my forehead into the floor and put my hands to my ears. My own anguished cry joined hers as I listened to her screaming for help over and over again.

“No! Stop! Help me . . . please!”

The noise stopped suddenly and I opened my eyes to stare at the carpet as I slowly removed my hands from my ears. I put my hands to the floor to push my body up and froze when my fingers grazed something. Cries started back up in the room, and my body filled with dread at what I might find next to me. Looking to the left, all the blood drained from my head and my stomach churned. Rachel’s severed fingers lay there directly below mine. Dry heaves rocked my body as the auditory assault steadily grew louder again and a new visual one began.