“Let’s go to a party.” Gard scooped Jenna into her arms, turning in a wide circle before kissing her. Jenna’s arms came naturally around her neck.
“What was that for?” Jenna asked quietly, resting her head on Gard’s shoulder.
“That was for happy.” Gard sucked in a hard breath when Jenna licked her neck.
“Mmm, you taste nice.” Jenna tilted her head back. “Are you? Are you happy?”
Gard buried her face in Jenna’s hair. Sweet dahlias and spice. “Whenever I’m with you.”
“Gard, I…”
“What?” Gard steeled herself. So soon? She couldn’t be saying good-bye so soon. “What, Jenna?”
Jenna’s answer was interrupted by the sound of an approaching car. Gard carefully let Jenna down to the porch and peered down the drive. A silver Jag sports coupe cut through the twilight, pulled in behind Gard’s truck, and a blonde climbed out.
“Hi. Is Alice Smith here?” the woman called. “Or am I completely lost?”
Behind them, the screen banged open and Alice bounded out. “Diane! You’re in the right place. Come up.”
The svelte blonde with elegant, sculpted features joined them on the porch. Even dressed in plain navy pants, flats, and a loose silk tee, she screamed New York society. Gard’s jaws clenched so hard her teeth ached.
The newcomer waved to Alice before holding out her hand to Jenna. “Hello. I recognize you from your book jackets, Cassandra. Wonderful to meet you. I’m Diane Bleeker.”
“Call me Jenna,” Jenna said.
Alice threw her arms around Diane. “God, you look amazing. Tell me her name.”
Even in the near dark, Diane’s blush was evident. Gard found the woman’s undisguised pleasure disarming. She’d never seen Susannah light up like that at the mention of her.
“Valerie.”
“Well,” Alice said, “she’s doing something right.”
“Yes,” Diane said softly.
Jenna wrapped her arm around Gard’s waist. “Thank you so much for coming up on such short notice, Diane. This is—”
“Gard,” Gard interrupted. “Nice to meet you.”
“You also,” Diane said.
Alice grabbed Diane’s hand. “Come inside and catch me up with all the news. We’ll get your bags later.”
Diane nodded to Jenna and Gard. “It was nice meeting you both. I’ll talk to you tomorrow, Cass—Jenna.”
“Yes. Thank you.”
When Alice and Diane disappeared inside, Gard took Jenna’s hand. “Still want to go?”
“Absolutely.” As they crossed the yard to Gard’s truck, Jenna said, “Diane is an art dealer and gallery owner. She’s here to look at Elizabeth’s paintings.”
“I remember you telling me someone was coming. That’s great.”
Jenna stopped, leaned against the front fender, and pulled Gard over to her by the waistband of Gard’s jeans. “Are you all right?”
“I’m great.” Gard wanted Jenna to have a good time. She wanted every minute they had left to them to be lived free of past regrets or future fears. “No stalling. You owe me a dance.”
“I think you have that backwards.” Jenna brushed her mouth over Gard’s. “Just the same, I intend to give you a dance like you’ve never had before.”
Chapter Twenty-six
“Looks like the whole county is here,” Jenna said as Gard parked atop a grassy slope at the end of a long line of pickup trucks, station wagons, and the occasional motorcycle.
“Might be before the night is over.” Gard pocketed her keys and jumped out.
Jenna hopped down and met her in front of the truck. Below them, an enormous blood red barn with a gambrel roof, three cupolas, and an iron weather vane loomed over a cluster of ramshackle out-buildings. Light spilled out through the wide-open double doors, illuminating people milling about with bottles of beer and plastic cups. The low roar of voices and the strains of a band playing country western tunes floated on a breeze fragrant with honeysuckle.
“Ready for this?” Gard clasped Jenna’s hand.
“Oh yes.” Jenna swung their joined hands in a long easy arc, astonished at her own excitement. Nothing could be further from her usual night out—an evening with a woman dressed for success, dinner in a chic restaurant, ending the night in a five-star hotel having urgent sex with someone who was looking for nothing more than she was—a moment’s connection and the physical proof of being alive. She wanted to make love with Gard at the end of this night, too, but not to prove anything. To celebrate something. And that difference changed everything. When she was with Gard, she was more than just happy. More even than just whole. When she was with Gard, she was more herself than she had been since the night she’d left home. Somewhere in the process of falling in love, she had found herself.
She tugged Gard’s hand until Gard slowed, a question in her eyes. A crescent moon rode the clouds overhead, silvering the sharp planes of Gard’s face with haunting beauty.
“Second thoughts?” Gard asked.
“No, none,” Jenna said. Walking beneath a summer sky ablaze with starlight, her fingers entwined with those of a woman who knew her and a lover she trusted, she was completely certain of everything that mattered. “I love you.”
“Jenna,” Gard whispered, her hand trembling in Jenna’s.
“No response is required.” Jenna cupped Gard’s jaw and trailed her fingers along the bunched muscles beneath the smooth skin. “I just wanted to say it. Now let’s go dance.”
“In a minute. Give me a minute. You can’t just say that and keep walking.” Gard framed Jenna’s face, her thumbs lightly brushing the corners of Jenna’s mouth. “You honor me, and I don’t deserve it. I don’t deserve you. I—”
“Don’t say that.” Jenna kissed Gard’s palm. “It’s not about deserving. It’s about how you make me feel—which is pretty damn wonderful.” Jenna threaded her arm around Gard’s waist, sensing her worry, her fear. Wanting to soothe her, she teased, “I’m going to have a hard time tonight if I can’t touch you pretty much all the time.”
Gard grasped Jenna’s shoulder and held her tightly. “You can touch me anyplace, anytime. I…I pretty much love it when you do that.”
“You’re in trouble now.” Jenna laughed, wondering how she’d never noticed she’d been living half a life before. Now the incredible sensation of being whole lit up her soul. Her past, her present, and hopefully her future were finally connected. The thread of her life ran straight and true, and even the pain was part of her happiness. She rested her cheek against Gard’s shoulder. “Loving you makes me so happy.”
“We’re either going inside now,” Gard muttered, “or we’re going back to the truck so I can take you home and make love to you.”
“Well now, there’s a difficult choice.” Jenna released her grip on Gard’s waist and squeezed her ass. “But you know, I’m in the mood for foreplay, and I don’t think there’s any better kind than dancing. Let’s go inside.”
“Anything you want.” Gard pulled her close. “Anything.”
Anything you want.
Gard only wished she could keep that promise, but if Jenna didn’t come to her senses, she didn’t see how she could. She guided Jenna through the crowd, stopping every few feet to return greetings and introduce Jenna. Her mind was only half on the fragmented conversations—she was still reeling from the words I love you. Nothing she’d ever imagined hearing again, and not from Jenna. Not now, not when every waking moment she’d been preparing herself for Jenna to leave. Waiting for the awful barrenness of heart to swallow her when Jenna went home. She hadn’t expected love. And she knew damn well she couldn’t have it. But for tonight, for these few hours, she’d have Jenna. She never let go of Jenna’s hand and no one seemed to notice, or if they did, they didn’t care.
“There’s Rina,” Jenna said.
Rina, wearing civilian clothes—black jeans, a white shirt, and black motorcycle boots—stood by a long trestle table covered with a bright red and white checkered tablecloth talking to a buxom brunette in a shiny black vinyl skirt. A big aluminum tub of crushed ice with beer bottles standing out like fence posts in a winter field squatted on the table next to platters overflowing with sliced ham, turkey, and roast beef, and baskets of bread.
“Feel like a sandwich?” Gard asked.
“I don’t think so. But I’d love something to drink.” Jenna brushed the sweat off her cheeks with her fingers. “Alice was right. It’s hot in here.”
“Wait until later.”
Gard plucked two dripping longnecks out of the tub, handed one to Jenna, and left a ten in a pile of bills on the table. She twisted off the cap and took a long pull just as Rina skirted the crowd and slipped in next to them.
“Not working tonight?” Gard asked.
Rina’s gaze dropped to Gard and Jenna’s linked hands, then rose back to Gard’s. “Believe it or not, I’m completely off duty. Good to see you both.”
“Hi, Rina,” Jenna said.
“Your houseguest still with you?” Rina asked.
“Alice? Yes. I tried to talk her into coming tonight, but I’m not sure I sold her—”
“Appears that you did.” Rina tilted her chin in the direction of the door. “She just walked in. With a date, it looks like.”
Jenna checked over her shoulder and waved until Alice saw her. “Not a date, a friend and business associate.”
“Huh,” Rina said, tracking Alice through the crowd. “How are things coming along out at the house?”
“Fine,” Jenna said. “I love the place.”
Rina gave her a long look. “It’s a damn fine farm.”
“Yes, it is.” At that moment, Alice and Diane, both in jeans, T-shirts, and boots with heels quite a bit higher than Jenna’s, arrived. Jenna made introductions.
“Pleased to meet you, Ms. Bleeker,” Rina said, shaking Diane’s hand. She grinned at Alice. “I was hoping you’d make it tonight.”
“Really,” Alice said with a speculative smile. “You’ll have to tell me why, later.”
“I’ll do that.”
Alice grasped Jenna’s elbow. “Diane took a quick look at a few of Elizabeth’s paintings. She thinks my idea for a book signing and art exhibit is a good way to judge local interest. I’ll make some calls in the morning, but I think I can set something up in Bennington almost anytime.”
“Thanks. It’ll be good promo for my new release.” Jenna said to Rina, “Diane is an art dealer. She came up to look at Elizabeth’s paintings.”
“Really? Paintings.” Rina frowned. “I didn’t know she did that.”
“Apparently, no one did.”
“Well, if you do a book signing, be sure to let me know.” Rina grinned. “I’m a fan, remember? I know quite a lot of folks who are.”
“I’ll see to your invitation personally,” Alice cut in.
“Counting on that,” Rina said.
“Save me a dance tonight,” Alice said with a last look at Rina before hooking her arm through Diane’s. “And now, let’s go hunt up something to drink.”
The music provided by two guitar players, a fiddler, and a drummer switched to a slow ballad and couples, young and old, congregated in front of the makeshift stage to dance. Jenna glanced at Gard and lifted her brow. “Well?”
Gard gave a little bow. “Would you care to dance?”
“I most certainly would, thank you.”
Gard made yet another path through the laughing, jostling people to the dance floor and swung Jenna into her arms. Jenna’s arms came around her neck and Gard clasped her waist. Their legs slid together as naturally as their fingers interlocked when they held hands. Gard rested her cheek against Jenna’s temple and led her into a slow, easy waltz.
“You’re a good dancer,” Jenna whispered against Gard’s throat.
“A bit out of practice,” Gard said, stealing a quick kiss. She stroked Jenna’s back as they swayed in the crowded space. Holding Jenna made it practically impossible to think about anything, not when blood rushed through her head and her loins with equal intensity. Just the same, despite the haze of arousal, she kept hearing Rina saying she wanted to go to Jenna’s book signing. A public event. Cassandra Hart in a local appearance. Jenna had said she loved her. Jenna was willing to risk her heart and maybe her career. Jenna had never pressed about her past, hadn’t asked for anything at all, not even if Gard had any feelings for her. Jenna had taken all the chances, and what had Gard given her? Nothing. She’d taken what she shouldn’t have, because like always, she was selfish. She skimmed her hand over the back of Jenna’s neck and into her hair, cradling her head as she kissed her again. The lights were low in the barn, but anyone watching could have seen them.
Jenna moaned softly and pulled away. “Sweetheart, I can’t resist you, and this might not be the place…”
“I know,” Gard said, her throat tight. “I just need you. Jenna, I need you.”
“Oh,” Jenna whispered, brushing away a stray lock of hair that had fallen over Gard’s forehead. Her fingers were trembling. “You need only ask.”
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