?Would you?mind running that by me one more time? I think I missed something.?
?Which part??
Hodge blushed. ?Everything after the ?I?d like you for number one? part.?
Dylan laughed softly. ?I asked you if that would be alright with you.?
Hodge felt that queer stunned sensation threaten to come down over her again. She gamely shook it off. ?You?re asking me??
?Yes, I?m asking. To be honest, Catherine, I have no desire to waste my prime pick on someone who?ll refuse to sign a contract because she believes her talents could be put to better use elsewhere. The Badgers have never been contenders, but we?re getting close. I want someone who wants to be on our team as much as we want to have her. And I?d like that someone to be you.?
?Are you kidding?? Hodge asked, with a natural exuberance that she couldn?t hide if she tried. ?I?d love to play with you!?
She froze as those words hung in the air between them. She felt her entire body go warm with a flush hot enough to start the overhead sprinkler system.
?I?uh?didn?t exactly mean that the way it sounded.?
?I think I understand your point,? Dylan replied dryly.
Hodge continued on as if she hadn?t heard, though in fact she had. ?It?s just?. When I was a child, I fell in love with basketball. I don?t know why, I just know I did. And as I got older, people kept giving me reasons why I couldn?t play. They told me I was too short, or too slow, or too skinny, or whatever. And it was hard, because when you?re a kid, you kind of walk this tightrope between wanting to listen to ?authority? and wanting to prove everyone wrong.? She laughed. ?I know I don?t look like much of a rebel, but I was in those days.?
Dylan simply smiled and nodded, interested in hearing this fascinating young woman speak her mind. Her voice was melodic and soothing, and as she listened, Dylan felt her headache begin to slip away.
?I was in high school, fighting for a spot on the team, when you turned the league on its ear. You were?it was?god?amazing to watch. It was then that I realized.?
?What?? Dylan asked, entranced.
?Everything I was going through, you were too.? Hodge held up a hand to forestall any comment. ?I don?t mean that you were too short or anything, because obviously you?re not.? She laughed softly. ?But I can remember the articles and the sports commentators saying that a woman would never be able to dunk as well as a man, or shoot as well as a man, or hundreds of other things. And instead of listening to those people, you just went ahead and proved everyone wrong by doing what they said you couldn?t. And I realized that if you could do it, so could I. I saw that you were opening a door, and I was going to do my best to walk through it.?
Leaning slightly forward, Hodge looked Dylan directly in the eye. ?You taught me how to fight, and you taught me how to win. And I know there is so much more I can learn from you. So yes, I want to be part of the Badgers as much as you want to have me there.?
Their food arrived just as Hodge finished speaking. Dylan used the time to ponder Hodge?s words, and the passion so evident in the young woman. If there had even been a glimmering of a doubt before, none existed any more. Catherine Hodges was a winner.
Dinner was eaten in companionable silence, and when the last morsel had been consumed and the dishes taken away, Dylan again looked at Hodge. ?There are some other things we need to discuss before you make your final decision.?
Hodge felt a tremor of nervousness run through her, but did her best to look unfazed. ?Is there something wrong??
?No. At least, not in the traditional sense.? Letting out a breath, Dylan tried to compose her thoughts. ?What have you heard about the Badgers? owner, Horace Johnson??
?Well, I know that he owns Johnson?s Electronics, a nationwide chain of electronics superstores. I know that he?s active in supporting the Republican party, that he?s married and has one son and a daughter, and that he?s known to be a bit?conservative in his political leanings.?
?Mm,? Dylan replied. ?Conservative would be one way of putting it, yes.?
?Let me guess. He has an issue with the fact that I?m gay.? Hodge didn?t need verbal confirmation. The look in Dylan?s eyes told her everything she needed to know. ?Well, we might have a problem then, because it?s not something I can switch on and off.?
?I know.?
?So?where does that leave us??
?That depends,? Dylan replied. ?Though it?s something I?m not fond of, all the contracts in the league have a morality clause. Same one for everybody, players and coaches.?
?Not the owners, huh??
Dylan smiled. ?No, not the owners. It?s pretty standard. Don?t break the law, don?t get caught sleeping around, don?t party all night long and then lead the police on a chase through the city. Basically, don?t do anything that?s going to embarrass the league or its image.?
?Don?t be gay??
?Be discreet.?
?Closeted, you mean.?
?Discreet,? Dylan answered.
?I don?t mean to sound argumentative, but I?m not sure I understand the difference.?
Sighing, Dylan nodded. She hated herself for even having to bring this up. Damn Johnson and his bigotry. ?There are several gay players in the league. Their right to privacy prevents me from giving you their names. Except for one.?
Reaching into her pocket, Dylan pulled out a business card and slid it across the table. Hodge looked down at the name, then back up at Dylan. ?Shauna Keeps. She used to play with you on the Lightening.?
?Yes. She got traded last year to the Shot and is living here in Boston with her partner and their daughter. She can answer your questions. She?s expecting your call.?
Hodge almost?almost?broke down and asked the question that sat between them, like a white elephant. Instead, she nodded and slipped the card into her own pocket. ?Thank you. I?ll call her this afternoon.?
?Talk to her. Then think about everything. When you?ve made your decision, let me know.?
?I?ll do that.?
When the check was presented, Dylan waved Hodge off. ?This one?s on me.?
Hodge smiled. ?Thank you.?
Dylan permitted herself for just a moment to feel the energy between them. Then she closed it off, and stood.
Hodge stood with her, and the two shook hands. ?I?ll call you,? Hodge promised.
?I?ll be waiting.?
Then Dylan was gone, leaving behind a radiant vigor that echoed her passing.
?Wow,? Hodge said softly, shaking her head. ?Just?wow.?
Much like the woman herself, Shauna Keeps? home was large, open and airy. Situated on a high bluff well outside of the city proper, it had a commanding view of the countryside as seen through a multitude of large, floor-to-ceiling windows.
Shauna opened the door a moment after Hodge knocked and, with a big grin, escorted the smaller woman into her home. A smidge over six feet tall, she was long, lean and incredibly attractive. Her skin was the color of melted dark chocolate and her eyes were several shades lighter, giving her face an exotic intensity that Hodge found extremely compelling.
A wide, warm, and white smile greeted her. ?Cat Hodges, right??
Hodge couldn?t help but return the grin. ?Yes, that?s right. And you?re Keepaway.?
Keeps laughed. ?Right on. C?mon in.?
Hodge followed her host inside, and stopped, entranced as she entered the huge living area. Everything— walls, floor, ceiling, furniture, electronic equipment, everything— was a brilliant, almost blinding white. Except for the warmth of the air, she might have entered some well-appointed igloo on the arctic tundra.
A door to the left of the living room opened, admitting a petite, stunning woman carrying a sleepy toddler on one hip. Shauna?s smile grew. ?Cat, I?d like to introduce you to my partner, Verdelle, and our daughter, LaShonda. Dell, this is Cat Hodges.?
Hodge grasped Verdelle?s hand warmly and smiled at the toddler, who smiled shyly back and burrowed her face into her mother?s neck. ?Very pleased to meet you, Ma?am.?
Dell laughed. ?I can?t be more than three years older than you, girl. Dell is just fine.?
Hodge grinned. ?Dell, then.?
?Good to meet you, too. D?s pretty high on you.?
Gathering that ?D? was Dylan, Hodge nodded, barely managing to keep a blush from coloring her cheeks.
Dell looked over to her partner. ?I?m gonna take the baby up for a nap. You guys want anything before I go up??
?No thank you,? Hodge replied.
?We?ll be fine, baby,? Shauna answered, kissing her partner and daughter. ?Be up in a bit.?
After Dell had climbed the circular staircase and disappeared from sight, Shauna turned to Hodge. ?C?mon, let?s get comfortable.?
Hodge followed her hostess through another door and into what Shauna called a sunroom, which looked like a very large glassed in porch. Hodge liked it immediately. She was directed to a large, overstuffed leather recliner and sat down, enjoying the comfort. Shauna took the chair?s twin, easing her long body down into it with a groan of relief. ?Damn back?s still screwed up,? she grumbled under her breath.
?Will you be okay before the season starts??
Shauna grinned. ?Oh yeah. No problem there.? Her smile faded just slightly. ?D tells me you got some questions about the politics in the league.?
A bit uncomfortable, Hodge rubbed at the back of her neck. ?Well, I do. Kind of. But I don?t want to intrude on your privacy.?
?Girl,? Shauna said, laughing, ?you?re not intruding on anything. Dylan trusts you, and that?s alright by me. Go on and ask your questions. I won?t bite.?
?Well,? Hodge said, still unsure, ?they have to do with?being gay.?
With a huge grin, Shauna leaned forward, clasping her large hands between her knees. ?You need some pointers? Alright! I can do that!?
Hodge laughed, feeling instantly better. ?No, no. No pointers. I need to know what it?s like?being gay in the league. How do you live your life without worrying about breaking the rules? I mean, I?ve lived openly for so long. How do I go back into the closet??
Shauna slumped back in her chair. ?Aw, Cat. It ain?t about going back into the closet. It?s about keeping your public face away from your private one. You understand??
?No, not really.?
?It?s like this, Cat. Once you go big time, you live in a bubble. A glass one. You might think you?re a basketball player, but you?re really fanbait. Once you take your first step out onto the court as a pro, your life isn?t your own anymore. You belong to them.?
?Them??
?The crowd. The people who pay to watch you play. If you?re any good at it, and D thinks you?re gonna be, they?ll wanna know everything about you. Everything.?
?God,? Hodge whispered, feeling a heavy, smothering weight descend upon her shoulders. ?How do you cope??
?You cope, my friend, by digging out this little piece of your life that?s yours and only yours. And you guard it, man, you guard it like it?s fuckin? Fort Knox. And the only people you let in are the people you want to let in.? Keeps favored Hodge with a look heavy with compassion. ?On the outside, you?re all smiles, the league?s newest sensation. But on the inside, where it counts, you?re you. You gotta keep ?em separated, or you?ll go down. Hard.?
Hodge thought about this for a long moment. ?But?what about Coach Lambert? I mean, she?s everywhere. She?s always giving interviews, posing for pictures when she?s out on the town. She doesn?t seem to have a problem with it.?
Shauna?s expression turned to one of deep sadness. ?That?s where you?re wrong, Cat. This shit is harder on her than on anyone I know. People think they know her, but nobody really does. Not down deep, not in here.? A long finger pointed to the center of Shauna?s chest. ?She?s so walled off that sometimes I?m scared for her, you know??
?I don?t understand,? Hodge replied, frustrated.
Shauna sighed. ?I know. And I?m not makin? it any easier. Why don?t I lay a little history on you. Maybe that?ll help.?
Hodge gave a grateful nod. ?Thank you.?
?Right before D hit the scene, the league was goin? down the tubes big time. The novelty of watching women jump around in tank tops was wearing off. People were complaining that the game was too slow, the scoring was too low, there was no offense, no defense, whatever. And then you had the gay thing.?
?Yeah,? Hodge replied, ?I remember hearing about that.?
?It hits most women?s sports sooner or later. We just got blasted especially hard. Folks stopped comin? to the games, stopped bringin? their kids, like they were gonna catch something. It just got outta control. Crash and burn time, baby.?
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