Rachel glanced down at herself to make sure her appearance matched her wellbeing, and then she looked back to the brother she loved more than anyone in the world. “I’m fit as a fiddle,” she told him as she made her way around the counter.
She was determined to not make this easy for him. If Mason wanted to know something, then he could be the one to bring it up. Ha! Good luck making that smooth transition.
“Yeah, so I see. That dress is cute.”
Leaning back against the counter, Rachel crossed one leg over the other as she clasped her hands in front of her. Really, Mase? My dress? Come on. Oh well, two can play at this game.
“Really? You think so? It’s a ’50s bebop dress. I made it myself. First, I had to sew the bodice, and I couldn’t decide if I wanted it as a halter neck or two straps, but obviously, I decided on the two straps. Then, I had to get all this black tulle for the underskirt to give it that kick, and that was such a hassle to sew on. It took me at least—”
“Rachel,” Mason finally interrupted.
Raising innocent eyes to his, she batted her lashes as he shook his head.
“You know why I’m here, don’t you?” he asked, sounding exasperated.
“I have my suspicions, but if you confirm them and say you heard from Josh this morning, then I can’t promise you his safety.”
Mason stuffed his hands in his pockets and took a step toward her. “He told me you called him from Cole’s house at six thirty this morning. Is that true?”
“Oh my god!” Rachel grumbled as she threw up her hands. “You two are worse than gossipy old women, you know that? Overprotective jerks,” she muttered.
“We’re just worried about you.”
“Why? Because I spent the night with someone? Give me a break, Mase. You didn’t act like this when Charlie was on the scene.”
Mason clenched his jaw and turned away from her. “That’s because Charlie was different.”
“Really? How? How was he different? I was sleeping with him, too, you know,” Rachel threw out.
When Mason turned on her with a pissed-off look on his face, she thought she might have gone over the top just a little bit.
“You slept with him already?” Mason thundered, pulling his hands out of his pockets. He moved back in front of her and gripped her arms. “Do you know anything about this…this Cole guy? From what Josh says, he’s pretty shady.”
“Shady?” Rachel laughed. “Josh does business with him! I hardly think Josh would use Cole as his lawyer if he didn’t trust him.”
Mason released her arms and raised his right hand to his eye. He pressed his fingers to his brow, like he was trying to control a twitch that had started there. “Just because Josh trusts him with his money does not mean Cole is a good guy. Lena told me you wanted nothing to do with him before. What changed?”
More than a little annoyed at this point, Rachel pushed away from the counter and stalked around behind it. Placing her hands on the surface, she glared at her brother. “So, everyone’s discussing my private life now? Did you have a conference call with Shelly and Josh this morning as well?”
“No, Rach, it wasn’t like—”
“You know what? I don’t care,” she said, effectively cutting him off. “I know you love me, Mason. I know that, but I need some time to myself.”
“Because of him?” her brother questioned, placing his hands on the opposite side of the counter.
“Maybe?” she hedged. “Would that be so bad? You don’t even know him.”
“Do you?”
Rachel thought about that for a minute before she shrugged. “No, not a whole lot, but I’m starting to. Isn’t that how things usually happen?”
Mason pushed back from the counter and ran a hand through his dark hair as he shook his head. “Usually, you get to know someone before you stay the night.”
Rachel raised an eyebrow at him before she laughed a little. “Okay, Dad.”
“You’ve just seemed so unhappy lately, Rach. I don’t want you to do something you’d regret.” Mason stepped behind the counter and took her hands in his. “You’d tell me if you needed anything, wouldn’t you?”
Rachel decided it was time to at least admit there were things going on with her even if she wasn’t a hundred percent sure what they were yet. Squeezing her brother’s hands, she looked up into eyes that mirrored her own and reminded her of the father they had both lost. “I just need some time to myself.”
Mason’s eyes creased on the sides as they focused on her. “I don’t understand.”
Rachel took a deep breath and blew it out, trying to think of how to word what she wanted to say. “I don’t know. Lately, I’ve been feeling like the fifth wheel, like I don’t belong, you know?”
“We’ve been making you feel like that?” he asked, concern covering his face.
Rachel shook her head and tried to explain. “No…well, not intentionally. Honestly, between you and Lena and Josh and Shelly, I’m just feeling a little bit…lonely.”
The expression that crossed her brother’s face almost broke her. He looked pained, like someone had ripped out a part of him and told him he couldn’t have it back. Pulling her to him, he wrapped his arms around her as she hugged his waist.
“I had no idea you felt like that,” he confessed against the top of her head.
“Why would you? I never told you.”
Pulling back from her a little, Mason nodded and held her for a moment. “Do you need me to sing?”
Rachel let out a small laugh. “No. No, I don’t need you to sing.”
“Are you sure? Because I think you do. It always helps.” He made a small production of clearing his throat, and then he began to hum before he started to sing, aww hell the entire chorus of My Girl, a song that was achingly familiar as he moved them around the flower store.
Rachel ran through the front door, slamming it behind her. Stupid dance, she thought as she reached up, tugging the hairpins from the French twist she had pulled her hair into. She knew it wouldn’t go the way she had wanted it to. Nothing ever did.
When Josh had told her he would take her to the winter formal, she had been so excited and, not to mention, a little nervous.
Being sixteen and having a senior take you to a dance was a big deal, but the fact that it was Josh—Rachel thought of him with a sigh—made it that much better.
She had spent hours picking out her dress, and she had finally decided on a light pink strapless one. It was made up of soft silk material that swept down around her knees, and for the first time in her life, Rachel felt like everyone else—pretty and not awkward.
At first, her father had been reluctant to let her go, but knowing that Josh was going to take her, her parents had relented and decided she could attend.
Now, I wish I never would’ve left the house, she thought as she ran up the stairs to her bedroom. She pushed through the door, moved over to the bed, and sat down, dropping her face into her hands. What an idiot! she kept repeating over and over in her head. She couldn’t believe what a giant moron she had been. How am I ever going to look at Josh? Or Mason? This was the worst night of her life.
As she sat there, berating herself, her door pushed open, and Josh poked his head inside.
“Can I come in?”
Rachel quickly wiped her tears, and looking away from the door, she mumbled, “Whatever.”
She heard him come into her bedroom and close the door behind him. Her heart started to speed up. Josh Daniels is standing in my bedroom, and we’re alone. How long had she been mooning over him? Yeah, well, that was officially over now since he probably thought she was a major loser.
“Why’d you run inside, Rach? I would have walked you to the door.”
Turning back to face him, Rachel glared up at the boy who held all her attention whenever he was around. “I’m pretty sure you know why, Josh.”
He took a step farther into the room and looked around. He looked uncomfortable.
Well, good. So am I, Rachel thought, feeling her embarrassment all over again.
“Look, there’s nothing to be upset about. We had a nice time, didn’t we?” he asked.
Rachel looked down at her hands clasped in her lap. Shaking her head, she felt the tears starting again. He looked so cute, standing there in his suit, with his shaggy brown hair pushed back. It was normal to do what I did, right? At least, she thought it had been until he had said no and pushed her away.
“Sure,” she murmured, reaching up to wipe another stupid tear off her cheek.
That was when she felt the bed dip beside her. Oh my god, Josh is sitting on my bed. Sitting as still as she could, she almost jumped out of her skin when he reached over and took her hand in his. Looking over at him, her mouth went dry as he smiled at her with the grin that every girl in school could not resist, including her apparently.
“You didn’t do anything wrong tonight,” he reassured.
Rachel tried to look away but found she couldn’t.
“It’s just…I’m with Lisa, and…well, you’re Mason’s little sister,” he explained.
Looking away to try and hide her shame, Rachel felt like an even bigger fool. When Josh reached out and cupped her chin, turning her face back to him, she was in shock.
“You took me by surprise,” he admitted.
Yeah, well, you and me both, pal, Rachel thought as she tried to pull her face away.
“Would you hold still?” he asked with a chuckle.
Immediately, Rachel found herself calming down when she did as she was told.
“Have you ever kissed a boy, Rachel?” he asked, his kind brown eyes searching her face.
Rachel felt her heart speed up as she stared at the boy she had known for most of her life.
“No answer?” he pushed.
Rachel couldn’t tear her eyes away from his mouth or make her lips move to speak as he leaned in toward her.
“Then, let me give you what you wanted. Let me be your first.”
After that, she didn’t remember much, except for the feel of Josh’s lips against hers. His kiss was so sweet that she felt it all the way down to her toes. He was her first kiss, and it was absolute perfection.
When he pulled back from her, he gave her a huge grin that warmed her heart and made her feel like she was glowing.
“There. Now, you’ve been kissed.”
Rachel sat still on the bed, trying to think of something to say, but for the next few minutes, she was content to just stare at him.
Right around the time things were about to turn from dreamland to the usual awkward world, she turned to the radio to switch songs. “My Girl” by The Temptations started to play through the speakers. It was the song her father had been singing to her for years, and everybody knew it, including Josh. Her father took any opportunity to embarrass her with impromptu serenades at birthdays, bedtime, and when he would dance her around the kitchen.
Josh stood and held out his hand to her. “You ran out on the last dance, so how about dancing with me now?”
Rachel stood and put her hand in his.
He pulled her forward and swayed with her as he sang in her ear, “My girl,” while he moved her around the small bedroom. Rachel closed her eyes and dreamed of her future, hoping it would include this boy.
I’m going to kill Josh and his big mouth, Rachel thought as she stared up at her brother.
“My cat is begging for you to stop,” she told Mason with a small grin.
He doesn’t need to know Tulip is hungry.
“Oh, is that why she’s meowing? I figured she was joining in.”
Rachel laughed and pulled away from her brother. “No, she was trying to drown you out.” Resting up against the counter with her arms crossed over her chest, she reiterated, “I just need some space. I need to be on my own for a bit. I love you all, but lately, I just need—”
“Space,” Mason answered for her. He pushed his hands back into the pockets of his jeans and nodded. “Fair enough, Rach. But the suit? Really?”
Thinking about Cole for a moment, Rachel had a flash of everything beneath the suit. She gave Mason a swift nod. “Guess we’ll see. He’s not that bad.”
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