‘If I had known it was so enjoyable I would have learnt to ride long ago,’ she said, as her confidence grew, ‘though I suppose with riding, as with everything else, it is the company that determines the enjoyment.’

She cast me a smiling glance and I felt that she had read my mind, for it was her company that was making the day so enjoyable for me.

After half an hour I felt she had had enough and she reluctantly dismounted.

‘You seem formed for a horsewoman,’ I said to her as I escorted her back into the Parsonage.

‘And for a musician,’ she said, glancing at the harp. ‘If you will but give me a moment to change out of my habit, I will play for you.’

‘I should be getting back to the house. Fanny will be wanting her mare.’

‘Cannot the groom take her back? I feel I cannot let you go without a reward for your efforts. Do not make me shame myself by taking so much from you without giving you something in return.’

I could not resist her and, having instructed the groom to take the mare back to the Park, I awaited her in the sitting-room. Mrs. Grant sat with me whilst I waited, telling me how pleased she was with her brother and sister, and before long Miss Crawford returned, to entertain me with her playing. I do not know whether it was the liquid notes of the harp or the graceful movement of her white arms across the strings that enthralled me most but I was held captive, and I felt that I had never spent a pleasanter morning in my life.

AUGUST

Monday 1 August

Miss Crawford made even better progress this morning than she did on Friday, and delighted me with her daring.

‘This is wonderful!’ she said, as she walked the mare about the stable yard. ‘Why have I never done this before?’

‘Because you have lived in town, and there it is not so easy to learn.’

‘But here, with you, it is simple,’ she said, giving me a smile. ‘I am beginning to think a country life is the life for me after all. To spend my time in the open air, in country pursuits, is becoming the ideal for me, whereas a few months ago the thought of it filled me with horror. What, to live amongst green fields with no shops or theatres to entertain me? But then I did not know what pure entertainment could come from simply living.’

I felt she had been in the saddle long enough, and was about to help her dismount when she said she wanted to try her skills beyond the stable yard. She was playful yet determined, and at last I gave in. Mrs. Grant, coming into the stables at that moment, proposed that we made a party of it, and before long Dr and Mrs. Grant, Crawford, Miss Crawford and I ventured into the meadow, escorted by our grooms.

We were about to walk round the meadow when Crawford suggested that, if I would escort his sister, the rest of the party would watch her and see how she did.

‘We can observe her much better if we are not too close to her,’ he said. The others were agreeable and Miss Crawford and I set off round the meadow together. To begin with we went at a walking pace but then she said, ‘This is so tame! Why do we not go faster?’

And with that she began to canter. She had a good seat and sat with her back straight and her head held high. Her veil was blowing behind her in the wind and a lock of her hair fell clear of its pins and blew about her face. It drew my eye, and I was not sorry when I had to call her to a halt and show her how to manage the bridle.

‘But there is Miss Price,’ she said, with an effort glancing towards the Park. ‘I have been very remiss. I have enjoyed myself so much I had quite forgotten her. Take me to her, if you please, so that I can apologize to her for keeping her from her exercise.’

I walked beside her, through the gate and into the lane, and we saw Fanny coming to meet us. I felt I had not behaved as I ought, for I had forgotten Fanny entirely whilst I had been with Miss Crawford, but Miss Crawford apologized so prettily that Fanny could not help but be satisfied.

‘I give way to you with a very bad grace,’ said Miss Crawford. ‘But I sincerely hope you will have a pleasant ride, and that I may have nothing but good to hear of this dear delightful animal.’

I helped her to spring down and then the old coachman lifted Fanny up on to the horse and they set off together.

Maria and Julia were delighted to discover that their new friend showed such a natural ability.

‘I was sure she would ride well,’ said Julia, ‘she has the make for it. Her figure is as neat as her brother’s.’

‘Yes,’ added Maria, ‘and her spirits are as good, and she has the same energy of character. I cannot but think that good horsemanship has a great deal to do with the mind.’

I could not help but agree.

When we parted at night, I asked Fanny whether she meant to ride the next day.

‘No, I do not know — not if you want the mare,’ she said kindly.

‘I do not want her at all for myself, but whenever you are next inclined to stay at home, I think Miss Crawford would be glad to have her a longer time — for a whole morning, in short. She has a great desire to get as far as Mansfield Common: Mrs. Grant has been telling her of its fine views, and I have no doubt of her being perfectly equal to it. But any morning will do for this. She would be extremely sorry to interfere with you. It would be very wrong if she did. She rides only for pleasure; you for health.’

‘I shall not ride tomorrow, certainly. I have been out very often lately, and would rather stay at home. You know I am strong enough now to walk very well.’

She is right in this, but I cannot help protecting her for I have done so almost half my life, and indeed I do not think I could stop now even if I wanted to.


Tuesday 2 August

We rode out to the common this morning and I was astounded by Miss Crawford’s rapid progress.

‘You did not think I could do it,’ she said to me teasingly. ‘Come, admit it.’

‘On the contrary, I never had a doubt of it,’ I told her. ‘I have seldom seen anyone take to horseback as rapidly as you have done.’

‘We must go out again tomorrow,’ she said. ‘I am sure there must be some other fine rides hereabouts, and we ought to make the most of the weather whilst it is so fine.’

‘Oh, yes, there are many pleasant rides,’ said Maria, ‘and there are an abundance of shady lanes, so that we may take our exercise even if the day is hot.’

‘Then I am at your disposal,’ said Miss Crawford.

Crawford was included in the invitation and we have arranged to meet again early tomorrow morning.


Wednesday 3 August

Three times now we have ridden around the country and Miss Crawford has never once complained of the heat, though it has been very hot. Today was no exception and we were all glad to arrive back at the Parsonage, where we sat in the shade and drank lemonade.

‘You must dine with us this evening,’ said Mrs. Grant. She turned to Maria. ‘We cannot prevail upon you to stay with us, of course, Miss Bertram, as rumor has it a certain person might be calling at the Park this evening, and we must not suppose any entertainment we can offer you will be equal to his. But I hope we may prevail upon you, Mr. Bertram, and you, Miss Julia, to join us.’

Maria returned to the Park and Julia and I spent a very agreeable evening at the Parsonage, with a fine dinner and Miss Crawford’s excellent harp to entertain us. Crawford joined her in a song and persuaded Julia to join in, too. Usually reluctant to sing, she yielded to Crawford’s entreaties and we were all very well entertained.

Julia and I walked home through the warm summer evening, glowing and cheerful, but when we returned to the Park we found that Maria, Mama and Aunt Norris were very much the reverse. Maria would scarcely raise her eyes from her book and wore a scowl; Mama was half asleep and even Aunt Norris was silent. Fanny was nowhere to be seen, but when I asked if she had gone to bed, her own gentle voice spoke from the other end of the room and she said she was on the sofa.

‘That is a very foolish trick, Fanny, to be idling away all the evening upon a sofa,’ my aunt scolded her. ‘Why cannot you come and sit here, and employ yourself as we do? If you have no work of your own, I can supply you from the poor-basket. You should learn to think of other people; and take my word for it, it is a shocking trick for a young person to be always lolling upon a sofa.’

‘I must say, ma’am, that Fanny is as little upon the sofa as anybody in the house,’ remarked Julia.

Fanny by this time had joined my aunt at the table, and I saw that she was looking far from well. When I questioned her, she admitted she had a headache, and that she had had one since before dinner. It was not hard to find out why, for my aunt had sent her out into the garden to cut roses.

‘It was very hot,’ said Mama, ‘though it was shady enough in the alcove where I was sitting.’

I was vexed that Fanny had been so ill used, and further vexed to discover that she had not only been standing and stooping in the hot sun, but that she had been sent across the park to my aunt’s house twice, the first time to take the roses and the second time to lock the door.

‘For she forgot to lock it the first time, so she was obliged to go again,’ said my aunt.

‘This should never have happened,’ I said, as I put my hand sympathetically on Fanny’s head. ‘It was too hot for anyone to walk much in the sun today, and certainly too hot for Fanny.’

‘If Fanny would be more regular in her exercise, she would not be knocked up so soon,’ said my aunt. ‘She has not been out on horseback now this long while, and I am persuaded that when she does not ride she ought to walk.’

I said no more, but took a glass of Madeira to Fanny and made her drink it. Vexed as I was with Mama and Aunt Norris for keeping her out so long in the sun, I was more vexed with myself, for it was I who had deprived her of her exercise by encouraging Miss Crawford to ride the mare. And it was I who had left her without any choice of companionship whilst we were away.

However unwilling I was to check a pleasure of Miss Crawford’s, I resolved that Fanny must have the mare whenever she wanted, for I would not see her ill again.


Thursday 4 August

I made good my resolve and took Fanny out for a ride this morning. I found that I had missed her company. The pleasant, fresh-feeling morning inspired us to travel farther afield than usual and we rode to Bridge’s farm. We called in to see Mrs. Bridge, for Fanny had heard that she was not well, and found her in bed with the new baby beside her. The other children were running wild, for although the eldest girl did her best, the younger ones would not mind her. Fanny set about seeing to Mrs. Bridge’s comfort and helping her with the baby whilst I called the children to order, and soon they were usefully occupied. When we left the house there were fresh flowers in an earthenware jar on the windowsill, the floor had been swept, Mrs. Bridge was easy, the baby was sleeping, and the other children were playing outside in the sunshine. We returned to the house. Having seen Fanny safely indoors, I went round to the stables to speak to the coachman, and when I went into the house at last I found that Rushworth and his mother were there. They had revived the plan of a visit to Sotherton and it had been decided that we would all go on Wednesday; all except Fanny, who was to stay at home with Mama.

‘I am sure Fanny would like the visit,’ I said. ‘I know she particularly wants to see the avenue. She may take my place and I will stay at home with you, Mama.’

There were the usual protests but at last I had my way.


Monday 8 August

There was a change of plan this morning, for Mrs. Grant offered to stay behind with Mama, and so I am to go with the others to Sotherton. I could not help my spirits rising at the thought of spending a day with Miss Crawford.


Wednesday 10 August

It was a perfect morning for our journey to Sotherton. Crawford arrived early with his sisters and Mrs. Grant alighted from the carriage, saying, ‘As there are five of you, it will be better that one should sit with Henry, and as you were saying lately, that you wished you could drive, Julia, I think this will be a good opportunity for you to take a lesson.’

Julia mounted the box and sat next to Crawford whilst Maria took her seat within. Fanny and Miss Crawford joined her and I mounted my horse. Mrs. Grant and Mama waved us of, with Pug barking in Mama’s arms, and we were away.