She didn't back down however, she moved in close and asked. "Have you?"
He blinked at her and tried to focus, the alcohol was swirling through his head and his eyes kept losing focus. "Have I what?"
"Forgotten that this is your place? You look horrible."
Mason's mouth snapped shut and he stood. "Fuck you."
He watched as she tossed her hair back over her shoulder and reached out to take his glass of scotch, she downed it in a quick gulp then placed the glass back and sneered up at him.
"I'm sorry, that option is no longer available to you Casanova."
She might as well have just said , asshole. "What the hell are you doing here?" he demanded.
"I'm here with work. I was about to leave when Wendy begged me to rid you of the fungus growing to your arm." she paused and looked him over again in a way that said she didn't find one thing about him appealing.
"Do yourself a favor Langley, go home and take a shower. Shave, cut your hair and pretend to be the man you use to be. At least for the people around you."
He moved in closer infuriated by her. After all, knowing she was telling him the truth and hearing it, were two totally different things.
"Where do you get off telling me what to do?" he hissed leaning down at her. "What right do you have?"
She didn't budge, she tilted her head up and glared at him and said softly, "None. But there are at least three women who care about you and give a shit about what happens to you. So pull yourself together."
He narrowed his eyes and breathed in her familiar vanilla scent. "Wendy and Rachel will love me no matter what." and that left the third, did she mean herself?
"So that means it's ok to disappoint them?"
He shook his pounding head and whispered, "You disappointed me."
Lena swallowed and nodded, "I know Mason. Don't do the same thing to them."
He flinched and watched as she turned and motioned for Shelly, who was standing very quietly behind her, watching everything with narrowed eyes. He glanced at her and she shook her head almost as though she were disappointed, whatever, he thought then called after Lena. "Don't do me any favors."
Lena stopped and looked over her shoulder at him, "I didn't do this for you." and with that she left.
Chapter Twenty Six
The first month passed by slowly. Lena wasn’t sure how she functioned day after day when her heart no longer seemed to work. Her days were long, and her nights seemed longer.
After that night at Exquisite, Lena had made a conscious decision to avoid Mason and anyone or thing to do with him. That was the only way she saw herself dealing with the finality of their relationship. Shelly had been great, she wouldn’t talk about Mason, ask about him or suggest anything even remotely related to him.
Lena continued to go down to visit Carly daily, and she found that her sister was in fact the best person to confide in. Every day she confessed how much it hurt to wake up and make herself go to work and be social with her colleagues, pretending she was doing fine. Fine, that was such a loose and misused word, and each day she found herself looking at the corner store to see if there was a picture of Mason on any of the stands, and when she realized she was doing it she got pissed off and walked into work in a foul mood.
It was Friday night and it was a week before Christmas and her parents were coming down to spend Christmas Eve with her. She was sitting on her couch trying to watch the TV but her mind kept wandering. Over and over she’d asked herself if she’d done the right thing. Should she have told him about his mother and her condition, even after Catherine had asked her not to? It was such a messed up situation there didn’t seem to be any kind of right answer she could decide upon.
What did it matter now anyway? He never wanted to see her again. He’d made that abundantly clear when she’d gone to drop the key off to his condo and the doorman had called up and Mason had told her to leave it down there and he’d pick it up. If that didn’t scream, I don’t want to see you, she didn’t know what did. She felt her eyes starting to fall closed when there was a loud knock on the door. Startled she sat up and looked at the time, 10.43pm. Standing she made her way over and looked through the peephole. There standing on her porch in a long black trench coat was Mason. He had his hands stuffed in his pockets and a burgundy scarf wrapped around his neck. The snow was falling down behind him and he stood there looking over at her small window. He raised his hand about to knock again when Lena took deep breath and opened it.
She looked tired. That was the first thing he noticed when she pulled the door open. Lena stood in front of him in grey sweat pants and a black long sleeve fleece. Her hair was pulled up into a top notch bun and her feet had black socks on them. His eyes met hers and she stood silently holding the door.
“Hello Lena.”
She moved from one foot to the other then stepped back deciding on what she wanted to do. “Hi. Come inside you must be freezing.”
He brushed past her and caught the familiar vanilla scent clinging to her. He heard the door shut and turned to face her. She was standing with her back against it and her hand on the door knob, she looked wary but curious. He moved to the opposite wall and leaned against it looking her over.
“You look tired.” It wasn’t what he meant to say but it just came out.
“It’s nearly 11pm. I was half asleep on the couch.” she defended lifting her chin slightly.
“Do you mind if I take my coat off?” he asked starting to feel particularly hot.
She shook her head her eyes running over him as he did. He knew he looked better than he had the last time she’d seen him. Since then he’d shaved, cut his hair and pretty much started up a regular grooming routine again. He was, however, still drinking more than he should. He draped the coat over the back of her couch then resumed his spot against her wall. The space between them seemed to stretch for miles and he never thought there would ever be a time where there was such an uncomfortable silence between the two of them.
“What are you doing here Mason?” she paused then added, “You made it pretty clear you never wanted to speak to me again.”
He winced and nodded, “I know. I’m sorry if I hurt you.”
“If?” she asked in disbelief then she seemed to mellow, “Well it doesn’t matter because I hurt you first.”
He looked right at her then, locking eyes with her and said honestly, “Yes you did.”
She didn’t flinch she just stood there, rigid against the door gripping the handle like it was a life line. She swallowed and stated bluntly. “I don’t know what else you want from me.” she bit her bottom lip and continued, “I’ve said I’m sorry. I gave you back your key. I’ve stayed the hell away from you. What else Mason? What do you want?”
He stood tall and moved toward her. He stopped when there were a few inches between them. He didn’t reach out, didn’t touch her, but he looked down and shook his head.
“Nothing. I don’t want anything from you.”
Sucking back a deep breath Lena felt the tears well in her eyes. She’d promised herself she would not cry in front of him. She blinked quickly trying to keep them back and tried to turn her sorrow into anger. How could he be so cruel?
“Why are you being so mean?” she paused and watched him tilt his head to the side as if he didn’t understand.
“I get it Mason. I know you don’t want anything to do with me, it was pretty obvious when you told the doorman to take my key. Did you really need to come here to tell me you no longer want anything to do with me?”
He shook his head and she watched his mouth flatten. “I suppose I said that wrong then. What I meant was, I don’t need you to do anything else. I know you’re sorry. I understand you feel terrible. I know you weren’t trying to be malicious with what you did.”
Lena let out a shuddering breath and raised her eyes to his. She still had a death grip on the handle and he was standing still as a statue in front of her.
“Then why are you here?”
She watched him swallow then turn and walk back to lean against the wall, and she noticed for the first time how different he looked since the last time she’d seen him. He was starting to resemble the old Mason, except the eyes were still too cold and the expression on his face had lost it’s usual warmth. He had, however, shaved and cut his hair and was wearing jeans and a grey charcoal sweater with that burgundy scarf now draped around his neck, hanging down on each side.
He crossed his arms over his chest and spoke steadily. “We finally read mom’s Will yesterday.”
Lena literally stopped breathing for a minute then made herself take a deep breath wondering where this was heading. She remained silent waiting for him to continue.
“You were in it.”
Lena finally let go off the door knob and raised one hand to the side of her face and the other to cover her mouth, which had fallen open. “I don’t understand.”
Mason’s eyes focused on hers and seemed to pin her to the door. “She left you a portion of Precious Petals.”
Feeling her eyes widen Lena couldn’t breathe. She felt as though she was starting to hyperventilate.
“Are you ok?”
She heard him ask through the ringing in her ears. Leaning down resting her butt on the door and putting her hands on her knees she dropped her head between her legs and tried to focus on breathing. Why would Catherine do this? What did she know about running a flower shop? Plus she wasn’t even part of the family and she definitely never would be now. This was a nightmare. When she finally had her breathing under control she straightened back up and her questions must have been in her eyes because Mason answered them.
“I don’t know why she did it. All I know is she did.”
Nodding Lena tried to think of what to say. “Well. I’ll give it to you or to Rachel. Surely I can give it back to you?”
She watched him shake his head. “Nope part of the clause is that you’ll help run and overlook the store for a full year and then if you choose to sell or give it to us after that you may, however, you’ll still be given seven standard sized sunflowers per week for the rest of your life.”
“Oh my God.” Lena said slowly, now holding her chest. Blinking over at him she shook her head, “I’m sorry I had no idea she’d done that.”
He pushed up and off the wall and grabbed his coat. He shrugged it on and made his way toward her, presumably to go out the door in which he came.
“I know. None of us saw it coming. Except her.”
He reached into his pocket and pulled out a sealed envelope. It had her name written in cursive on the front. “We all got one, even you.”
Lena reached out to take it and when she gripped it he spoke softly, “I wanted to rip this up and I wanted to read it, but none of it compared to how badly I wanted to use it as an excuse to see you.”
Her eyes flicked up to his and she could see he was trying to decide whether to continue or leave it at that.
He let go of the envelope and whispered softly, “I want to forgive you Lena. Every day I try. I just can’t right now.”
Lena felt a tear slide down her cheek but she refused to wipe it away. He stepped back and she moved away from the door clutching the letter. He opened it and stepped outside. Turning in the snow he looked up at her on the porch and she thought he was the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen.
“My new number is on the bottom of the envelope.”
Lena nodded and watched him walk away wishing there was something, anything she could do to make him stay.
Chapter Twenty Seven
Christmas had come and gone. Lena’s parents had come down to visit on Christmas Eve and it’d gone well. It was the first Christmas in years where Lena had been able to discuss anything relating to her sister. The only ache in her heart this time around was caused by a six-foot three-man, who was still not speaking to her. Her mother had asked about Mason but she hadn’t known what to say, so instead she’d told her about Catherine, cried and hugged her. Somehow she couldn’t bring herself to tell her that she’d known all along that Mason’s mother was sick. She couldn’t bear the judgment that would cross her mother’s face as it had Mason’s.
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