Marion Croslydon - Fast Forward

Five seconds of silence when I heard the light buzzing of the line.

“Josh, it’s me.” Her voice had that familiar melody I’d liked so much.

“Hey Lenor. How are you?”

“I’m fine, but I’m worried about you.”

“What for?”

“I had the displeasure of talking with my father this morning. One of his usual inquisitions into my life… but, anyway, that’s not the point. He got angry and that was when he mentioned meeting Andrew Estevez last night. From what I understand, my dad lashed out on you to your boss.”

“I know. Andy came and talked to me about it. It’s all fine. It just so happens that my boss can’t stand your father anyway.”

Lenor’s laugh resonated in my ear. “And yet another on the long list of Carrington haters. That’ll make Zach happy.”

Zach, Lenor’s first love.

I hesitated for one moment, not sure what the etiquette was between exes. I asked anyway, “How are things going with Zach?”

She sighed. “Complicated. Amazing. Painful… I’m not sure, it changes every day. I’m not—, I don’t,” she stammered, “Second chances don’t come easy.”

“They don’t. That’s why they’re worth fighting for.”

“Maybe… or maybe it’s a sign it was never meant to be. At least him and me.”

“That’s for you to decide, Lenor. You must do what’s good for you.”

Another silent stretch. “How are Cassandra and Lucas?”

“She’s on her way back in D.C. now. We’re trying to speed up the adoption as much as we can.”

“Good luck, Josh. I hope you’ll be a family soon.”

“Thanks, Lenor. Don’t settle for less than you’re worth. And that’s a lot.”

I got the crystalline laugh of Lenor, the Socialite. She reverted to that role as soon as she was insecure. “You’re a sweet talker, Joshua MacBride. It’ll work miracles on the Hill. Take care!”

“Take care, Lenor.”

The line went dead.

In the restroom I splashed some water over my face. The mirror threw back the image of a man in dire need of sleep. I made my way back to the bar and checked my cell. There were no messages from Cassie, but I froze because she stood in the entrance, the revolving doors swirling around behind her. Her hair was pulled into a pony-tail and she was wearing skinny jeans which molded to her shapely legs. The T-shirt she wore had The Libs written on it. She was hot and totally out of place.

All I wanted to do was swinging her over my shoulder and get her the hell out of there.

Cassie checked out the room, oblivious to the men sitting by the bar that were checking her out. I bolted forward and, in a few strides, stood between my girl and the oglers.

“How did you find me?” I asked.

“Nice to see you too!” She threw back at me. “You told me the name of the bar and all I had to do was ask around. I’m not completely clueless.”

I kissed her cheek. I wanted to do much more since I’d not seen her in a week but it was hardly the place. “Sorry. I’m surprised, that’s all. You said you wouldn’t be here for ages and I resigned myself to wile away the time on my own.”

“Hey, MacBride!” Bradley passed by, probably back from the restroom. His gaze swept over Cassie’s body. The guy clearly wanted to have a longer look, but didn’t have the guts or bad manners to do so overtly. “Is this your wife?”

I left the question hanging. After Estevez’ pep-talk I had this overwhelming need to keep Cassie and our life together shut away from my career.

“I’m Cassandra.” She extended her hand.

“Bradley. I work with Josh.” He shook Cassie’s hand. “Nice to meet you. Do you want to join us? I’m dying to find some dirt on this husband of yours. He’s difficult to get to know.”

I cut in. “We had plans and—”

“—I’d love to.”

“Cool. Do you want something to drink?” Bradley turned toward the bar.

“A Bud, please.”

Since when was Cassie into networking? She waited for Bradley to reach the bar and answered my silent question, “I want to know more about your work…” She looked around the room with its stainless steel bar top and the mahogany walls. “That way I can hopefully support you better.”

I didn’t want Cassie dragged into this.

“I’ll be fine.” She squeezed my forearm and I started thinking Cassie had a crazy ability to read my mind.

Andy had left but everyone else was still there. I introduced her and you would have had to be blind to ignore how surprised my colleagues looked.

Ashlyn, the nineteen-year-old press intern, spoke up first. “I didn’t know Josh was married.” She didn’t make any effort to hide her disappointment. “He doesn’t wear a wedding ring.” She checked Cassie’s fingers which were wrapped around her bottle of beer. “Neither do you.”

Cassie threw me a look filled with questions and they weren’t about why we didn’t wear wedding rings. They were more about why I hadn’t mentioned my marital status.

“I take it you don’t work on the Hill?” Ashlyn gave Cassie the once-over. Her jeans and T-shirt didn’t scream out the typical ‘job-behind-a-desk.’

“I’m actually looking for a job.”

Laura, a woman in her mid-forties, asked, “What kind of work?”

“Well, back in Kansas, I used to—“

“Cassie is a singer and song-writer. She’s just finished touring with an Indie band.”

My revelation was received with a stunned silence. People on Capitol Hill weren’t known for their rock ’n’ roll spirit.

Ashlyn pointed at Cassie’s T-shirt, “Is that the band you were touring with?”

“Yep! Except they’re not a band anymore. Their frontman is going solo. His name is Shawn Dupret and you’re gonna hear about him soon. He’s awesome.”

The rest of our small circle nodded and Ashlyn even let out a ‘whoa.’ Ten more seconds of awkward silence when everyone’s gaze was stuck on their drinks and Bradley asked, “Laura, any idea when Andy is due at the White House?”

The energy picked up again and the conversation reverted to its lively pace. Cassie’s face froze in a smile while my colleagues exchanged views on the latest hearing and the upcoming challenges of the fall semester. I chimed in only when I was asked a direct question, and my answers were short. My hand rested on the small of Cassie’s back. I was waiting for her to finish her beer so I could signal our departure.

“Hi, guys!” Hewitt joined our group with his trademark fake positive attitude. He zeroed in on Cassie right away. “Do we have a new addition to our team? As the Deputy Chief of Staff, I’m shocked I wasn’t informed.” Each time Hewitt talked I heard the hiss of a snake in the background.

“This is Cassandra, Josh’s wife.” Bradley made the introductions before I could open my mouth. “Cassie, this is Peter, our ever-competent Deputy Chief of Staff.”

Cassie gave Peter her brightest smile. For it to be that bright, I knew she was faking it.

“Come on, your jokes are getting a little old, man,” Peter commented while taking a swig of his beer. “I met Josh’s fiancée in Paris.” Silence crashed over our group and Cassie’s face turned blank. “Come on, Josh, it’s not a state secret you’re engaged to Bruce Carrington’s daughter.”

Embarrassed glances ping-ponged between my colleagues. My arms reached around Cassie’s shoulders and held onto her tightly.

“You’d better check your sources, Peter. I’m married, not engaged.” Cassie’s beer wasn’t finished but these after-work drinks were over. “Now, my apologies to you all, but my wife and I have plans for tonight.” I took Cassie’s bottle, laid it on the table next to us and we took our leave.

With Cassie’s hand in mine, we headed outside. She almost had to run to keep up with me, three of her strides to every one of mine.

“Stop right there, Joshua MacBride! Don’t you think you owe me an explanation?”

I spun around and saw her chin was raised in that stubborn manner of hers. Cassie was up for a fight, but I knew there was nothing to fight about. But I wasn’t going to bull-shit her either.

“I did see Lenor when I was in Paris. It wasn’t planned. She came to a cocktail reception at the U.S. Embassy where Estevez had been invited. That’s how Peter met her. I never mentioned being engaged to her, neither did she.”

“So it was completely random that the two of you met on the only night you spent in Paris? Remind me, Josh, how many people live in that goddam city? Ten million? Fifteen?”

“Twelve million in its metropolitan area.” I answered dead-pan. “And no, it wasn’t random. She’d heard Estevez would be there and she knew I’d be with him, so she managed to get a last-minute invitation.”

“You told me it was all over between the two of you?” Her voice trailed off. Cassie wasn’t playing it tough anymore.

“It is over, Cass. But Lenor needed to make sure it was for her too. She’s met someone in Paris.” I thought of the story Lenor told me, of her own second chance. It wasn’t for me to share, not even with Cassie.

She wrapped her arms around her upper body and her expression was closed. She wasn’t angry anymore. “If you have nothing to hide, why didn’t you tell me about it? I’d have been prepared in front of your work crowd and wouldn’t have looked like such a fool.”

“When was I supposed to mention it? The night in Phoenix when we found out Alfredo had died? Or on the day of his funeral when the Lorettis dropped their bombshell?”

“What about all last week?”

I rubbed my chin and let out a heavy breath. “Because I haven’t had time to do anything over the last week but work on Estevez’s memos. Because in the grand scheme of things—Alfredo’s death, Lucas’s adoption, or me having to prove myself at work—meeting Lenor in Paris wasn’t top of my list of things to discuss for the few hours we had together or the minutes on the phone.”

Cassie looked away from me and her gaze passed to the other side of the street. Her shoulders had drooped and she looked defeated.

I stepped closer to her and placed my index finger underneath her chin to lift up her heart-shaped face. When I managed to engage her gaze again, I said in a low voice that was only intended for her, “I’d have told you, Cass. I’m sorry you had to learn it this way, from that asshole Hewitt. I had no intention of keeping it a secret because it wasn’t a secret in the first place.”

Her lips twisted slightly to form a sorry smile. “I believe you, Champ.”

I kissed her forehead and the familiar softness of her skin chased away the tiredness that had piled inside me over the last week. Cassie hid her face against my chest and I heard her muffled words. “But I don’t care what else is going on in our life. If there’s anything new about Lenor, even last minute stuff, tell me.”

“She called me tonight to warn me about her father trashing me in front of Estevez. I already knew about it, but it was nice of her.”

Cassie’s head peeped up. “That Carrington is such a jerk.”

“That seems to be the consensus.” I thought of Zach Murdoch. “Cass, you need to trust me. I know it’s crazy to ask that with me having been engaged to Lenor only two months ago… but you have to believe me when I say it’s over with her.”

She nodded but it was a half-nod. I didn’t push because I knew words wouldn’t prove anything to her. Only actions. That meant time.

I only hoped time was on our side.

Cassie ~ Three months later

We’d received the approval for adoption today.

Today.

It’d been just under four months since that first meeting with Sawyer Curtis in Kansas City. It wasn’t long but it’d felt like a freakin’ lifetime to me. Apparently the Sorensons had decided to move to Oregon. Their move had helped to speed up our procedure.

I didn’t want to think of the Lorettis. I didn’t want to think of anything going wrong. Not now. Not when I was so close to have our son with me. Not when Josh and I were finally settling down and sharing the same life.

I’d never sauntered to work before. The Joker-smile I’d plastered all over my face on the subway ride and the over-friendly ‘hi’ I threw to my co-workers—co-workers I didn’t really know—were all signs I wasn’t all there.

Not that I’m impolite, but work was just that… work. Today, I was a happy camper, but also a late one. I’d found a job in a coffee shop in Georgetown; a ten-minute walk from our apartment, next to the school where we were planning to send Lucas. I wasn’t yet legally Lucas’s mom but the home study, the training sessions, and the interviews with the caseworker had helped me get my head around what our daily life with a five-year-old would be like.