It’s not enough. I want more.

Our mouths move together, synchronized in perfect rhythm. Overcome, I nip at her lip, pulling with my teeth then soothing the ache with my tongue. Her hands slide down to dip beneath my shirt. She pushes her hands up, the soft skin of her palms skating along my abs to my chest, leaving behind a trail of goose bumps. Skin to skin, no barrier between us, she must feel my heart hammering.

My body roars to take her. To bury in deep and lose myself forever. But I promised her one taste. As much as I’d love to spend the next few days ravishing her body, showing her what it’s capable of feeling, I won’t take advantage.

Slowing the kiss, I suck at her lips before moving down her jawline. The fragrance of her skin concentrated below her ear sends a groan of need from my chest. She arches her neck, opening up to me. The combination of her sweet skin and the salt of her sweat makes me hunger to taste her everywhere. I lazily glide my lips from her collarbone to her ear, trailing the tip of my tongue along her pulse.

I can’t help pulling her earlobe between my teeth. “Fuckin’ hell, Mouse. You’ll be the death of me,” I whisper and rest my forehead against hers.

The room is quiet except for the sound of our heavy breathing. I hold her close, reluctant to let her go, knowing that this is my only chance to have her in this way. I close my eyes and absorb the feel of her body in my arms. She’s so small and breakable, I’m overcome with the need to protect her. But that’s not my job. She doesn’t belong to me and never will.

“Why now?”

Her question brings my head back and my eyes to hers.

“You’ve been avoiding me. So, why now?”

She deserves an answer. A really fucking good answer. Truth is, I’m a pussy.

I move my hand from her hair and cup her nape. “I want you. But I’m no good for you.”

Her head bobs. “I thought, the other night when I shared all that stuff, I thought I scared you off.”

“No. But the shit I felt when you opened up like that wasn’t right.” How do I explain my unhealthy attraction? The fact is that a woman alone in the world, with a kid, brings out a primal urge to protect. It’s the ugly leftover from my past. Years of taking care of my mom and little brother, and throwing myself up as a barrier between them and the General, made me a slave. And I’m nobody’s bitch. “You, Axelle, you girls deserve steady. I’ll never be that guy.”

“But… that kiss.” She studies the spot where her hands rest unseen beneath my shirt. Her eyebrows pinch together like she’s seeing me for the first time. And she doesn’t look happy about what she sees.

“The kiss was hot, Mouse.” Hottest damn kiss I’ve ever experienced, but she doesn’t need to know that.

Her hands drop from my chest, and she pulls against my hold. “Let me go.”

“Can’t do that, sweetheart.” I flex my fingers at her neck and hip.

“Blake.” She glares at me, and I watch the violent storm build in her eyes. “Let. Me. Go.”

I should, and I will, eventually. But knowing that this is the last time I’ll hold her this close and feel her soft skin beneath my palm, I’ll milk the clock and soak up every second. “Just wanted a taste. Didn’t know how good it’d be.”

She rocks back with a grunt, but I hold her flush to my body. After a second of resistance, she sags in my arms. “Blake…” Her whispered refusal dies on her lips along with her fight. She leans her weight into me and grips the sides of my T-shirt.

My eyes slide shut, and I’m stuck somewhere between What the fuck and There is a God. Holding her like this, feeling her give herself over to me like she did before our kiss—Fuck. If I let myself feel what I’m burying deep, I don’t think I’ll let her go. Ever.

I lean down and bury my nose in her hair, my thumb tracing circles on the bare skin of her lower back. So soft, so fuckin’ sweet, so—oomph!

Sharp pain explodes between my legs. I double over, holding my balls, and drop to my knees. Shiiit.

“Next time a woman tells you to let go? Let. Go.”

Her purple and black Nikes walking away are all I see from my fetal position on the floor. I pinch my eyes shut with a groan and roll as the pain surges from my nuts into my stomach. Motherfuck. I swallow hard, fighting my gut’s attempt to jump out my mouth. My lungs burn and struggle as I suck air through my nose and grind my teeth.

I curl up tight and prepare for the ten minutes of hell that I’ll have to endure before I can chase after her. Or, fuck, at this point it might be better to quit while I’m down.

Twelve

Layla

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

I let him kiss me. He doesn’t so much as look at me for almost a week, and I let him kiss me. Even worse, I begged him to. It took him ten seconds to get me right where he wanted me. Ten seconds before he changed my world, had me skating on rainbows and seeing stars, only to knock me down. You girls need steady? I’ll never be that guy?

And where in the hell is the cereal?

The crack of my kitchen cupboard slamming shut gives me little relief. Not as much as seeing Blake squirm on the floor of the weight room like a dying animal. Ass-fucking-hole.

I stomp down the hallway to Elle’s room. “Elle, did you eat all the—?” Her room’s empty. “Elle?”

It’s almost nine on a school night. I wrack my mind, which is slushy from the kiss I still feel in my damn toes. Killian was supposed to bring her home. Or did she tell me she had plans after school, and I forgot? Maybe they went to a movie or had a late study group. No, I specifically remember her telling me she’d be home. If there was a change of plans, she would’ve called.

I tug my phone from the pocket of my sweatshirt. No new calls, no texts. I scroll to her number and press send.

Voicemail. Shit.

“Elle, it’s Mom. Where are you? Call me as soon as you get this.”

Heart pounding, hands shaking, I grab my keys off the kitchen counter. I’m halfway down the stairs to my car when I realize I have no clue where to look for her. I don’t know where Killian lives. Do I even have his number?

Dropping down, I sit on the step, my head between my hands. Deep breaths.

Good thing you’re infertile. You can’t even handle the one kid we have.

“Please, no. Not now.” Brought to my emotional knees. I’m not strong enough to fight the mental assault. I thought I could do this. I thought I could take care of us. No food in the cupboards, I’m having to take handouts, and I’m losing track of my daughter. I dig my hands into my hair and tug. The stinging pain on my scalp pulls me back to my reality. Where could she be?

I lift my gaze and clear my head. Jonah, he might be able to get ahold of Killian. But how do I get in touch with Jonah? I flip open my phone and scroll through my contacts to Raven’s cell number. I’m about to hit send when the rumbling of a truck engine grabs my attention.

Is it her? I push my ass off the step and down the stairs, resolving to hug her to death and then kill her.

Oh no.

The black Rubicon’s headlights flash off, the driver’s side door opens. Blake. And just like every other time I see him, I’m struck silent. His narrowed glare , rigid jaw, and solid frame targets me. He prowls forward. The ferocity of his gait sends my feet a few steps back in retreat. Running into the bottom step, I swing out my arm to catch myself from falling back onto the stairs.

Oh, God. He’s really mad. His green eyes burn into mine while his huge body closes in.

I walk backward one step at a time until I’m at his eye level.

He steps up to me and then stops. “Mouse.” His scowl moves from my hair to my cheeks, and relaxes into something softer by the time he meets my eyes. “What the fuck?” His voice is absent of its earlier irritation. “You okay?”

I blink at his sudden concern, surprised he didn’t call me out for kicking him in the balls. “No.”

He brings his hands to either side of my neck, forcing me to look at him. His thumbs run along my cheekbones. “Talk to me.”

“Elle. She’s not home. I don’t know where she is.”

Fire flares behind his green eyes. “She usually home by now?”

I nod into his hands.

“Did you talk to her after she got home from school today?”

“No. She’s been getting rides home from Killian, and sometimes they’ll grab a bite to eat or go study, but she always calls to let me know.”

“And tonight?”

“No call. Nothing.”

“Up.” He moves his hold from my face to my hips, turning me to guide me up the stairs.

I scurry up to my apartment, Blake following behind me.

Before he’s even inside, he has the phone to his ear. “Hey man, you got Killer’s number?”

I grab a piece of paper and a pen out of the junk drawer and hand them to Blake.

“It’s for Layla. She’s looking for Axelle.” He scribbles a few things on the paper. “Nah. We got it. But I’ll let you know.” He smiles at me in a way that I’m sure is supposed to be comforting, but the hint of fury that still works behind his eyes makes me squirm. “Later.”

His eyes drop to his phone. He punches in numbers then brings it to his ear. “Killian. It’s Blake. Listen, you take Axelle home today?”

I move in close and lean my ear toward the phone. Blake’s arm wraps around my shoulder and pulls me to his side. Gosh, that feels good. I nuzzle in, dropping my worry for what he might think the action implies, and soak up his comfort.

Killian’s voice mumbles through the cell phone, but I can’t understand a word. I peer up at Blake. “What’s he saying? I can’t hear him.” Panic throbs behind my ribs.

“You sure about that?” The arm around my shoulder pulls me tighter, and he nods. “Right. Thanks, man.”

He ends the call and shoves his phone into his pocket.

“What?” I pull back and cross my arms over my stomach, suddenly freezing cold. “Did he take her home?”

“Let’s sit.” He moves me into the living room and sits on the couch.

“I don’t want to sit, Blake.” Why do I need to sit? My head gets light, and my teeth chatter. “Is it bad? Are you afraid I’ll pass out? Just tell me, I’m freaking out here.”

“Come here.” He holds out his hand.

I don’t move.

“Everything’s okay, just come here.”

Closing the space between us, I grab his hand and he pulls me onto his lap.

The thought that I’m sitting on Blake’s lap in my living room tickles at the back of my mind, but the thought is shoved aside by my panic. “There. Now tell me what’s going on?”

He pushes my hair over my shoulder and lets his hand rest against my back. “Killian didn’t take her home today.”

“What!” I push off Blake’s lap, but he grabs my hips and pulls me back down.

“Sweetheart, calm down. You’re not doing your girl any favors by freakin’ the fuck out.”

“Okay, fine. Just tell me where she is.”

“He said she’s been hanging out with some different kids lately.”

Different kids?

“Guess she’s been ditching Killian after school and getting rides from a girl named Brooklyn.”

“Brooklyn. I’ve never heard her talk about any girl named Brooklyn.” She talks about a group of girls she’s made friends with, but they go see movies and go out for ice cream. “So she’s probably with her. Did Killian give you a number?”

A slight grimace twists his mouth. “Problem is, Killian doesn’t hang with that crew. According to him, they’re troublemakers.”

I feel my expression fall and my jaw go slack. My stomach turns and sours. “Oh no.”

“She’ll be fine, Mouse.” He sounds so sure. How can he be so sure? “But sounds like you girls need to have a mother-daughter heart-to-heart.”

I shake my head. “She doesn’t listen to me. She hates me.”

“Impossible.”

“No, I’m serious.” I groan and pinch closed my eyes. “It’s too late. I’ve lost her.”

He hooks my chin with his fingers, forcing me to look in his eyes. “It’s never too late.”

“You don’t understand—”

“I do. My dad’s a dick of epic proportions. He’s never been anything but a dick. Ever. You love your girl, she’s gotta feel it. She’s pissed. She’ll get over it. But she needs you. Do not give up on her.”