"I know why your father married you to my late uncle. It was to protect you and your fortune from his own impecunious brother. And it was my uncle's wish that I take you for my own wife when he died and I inherited. As there was no other woman in my life I felt suited to be my duchess, I agreed. I waited through a year of mourning, Caro, and we wed. Your first marriage was a celibate one. But this union is not, nor is it meant to be such a marriage. In an effort to consider your sensibilities I have been patient. I do not mean to be patient any longer. Now, get out of that tub, madam!"
"I have not denied you your rights, milord," the duchess said coolly.
"But neither have you joined into our bed sport with any enthusiasm," he complained to her. "You lie beneath me like a board. Do you feel nothing of passion? Is your heart a stone? Do you even have a heart?"
The duchess arose from her porcelain tub. The water sluiced down her lush body. "I have a heart, milord," she told him. "I am just not ready to fill a nursery. The three years I was married to your uncle I spent nursing him. Then I spent another year mourning him. I was married to you but a month after my mourning ended. We have been wed but six months. You spend much of your time in London. I prefer the country. Am I not entitled to a few months of peace for myself, milord, before I must take on the great responsibility of our family? And how, she wondered silently, can I allow myself to become enceinte when I spend my time traveling back and forth between England and France in order to rescue the innocent?
"Damn it, Caro, I am in love with you," the duke said. "I always have been, since the day my uncle introduced you to me as his new wife. The old duke knew how I felt. And he also knew that neither of us would ever betray him. We never did. He realized that you would be safe with me after he was gone. That was why he gained our promise to wed then. He wanted you to have a normal life. The kind of life a woman should have. And he wanted me to have you." The duke lifted a large towel from the rack by the fire and, coming close to the duchess, wrapped her in it, lifting her from the water. "It has been almost two years since my uncle died. I want children, and I want them now!" He dried her roughly and then, picking her up, carried her to her bed.
"Trahern!" she protested. "You are behaving like a barbarian.
"I am behaving like a husband who desires his wife," he said through gritted teeth. "Do you dare to refuse me, madam?"
Do I want to write the scene like that? Emily wondered to herself, and then she awakened to find herself in her bed. Should he admit to being in love with her? She glanced at the clock on her bedside table. It was just four a.m. Well, so much for the Channel. She would have to clock in earlier tonight. Yes, the duke should admit to loving his wife. It had to be her passion to revenge herself that kept her from admitting that she was in love with him. Yes, that felt right. Turning over, she punched her pillow and attempted to sleep.
She had slipped out of the Channel just as Trahern was about to make love to his duchess. But for the first time she had not simply been an observer. She had been in the duchess's skin. She had been Caroline Trahern. It had been an interesting experience. It had been exciting, and yet she had not been ready to make love with the duke. It was ridiculous to think as she was, but she felt as if it would have been cheating on Devlin. But the duke looked just like Devlin. And the Channel was a fantasy, not reality, wasn't it? Or was it that she was just a little shy about making love within the confines of the Channel, and then transcribing the experience onto the pages of her book? Yet she certainly could write what she and Devlin had been doing.
He wasn't due back in New York until Tuesday. He wouldn't be in Egret Pointe until Friday night. She had plenty of time to write her first explicit love scene before he wanted to see what she was doing. But no! The story line wouldn't be to that point by Friday night. But perhaps she could show some of the early sexual tension between Caro and Trahern by then. Give Devlin an idea of where she was going with it. And make love with him. Emily hadn't realized that, once she had savored sex with a man she liked, how much more she would want to keep repeating that same experience. But she did.
She missed the feel of his bulk against her in the night. She missed his weight on her, the incredible sensation of his penis inside of her, his mouth exploring her sensitive flesh. Emily shivered. She needed to sleep. She needed to escape her thoughts of their naked bodies against each other. Did all women feel like this with their first affair? She climbed out of her bed and, going into the bathroom, opened the narrow floor-to-ceiling medicine closet to pull out the aspirin bottle. Dumping two of the extra-strength tablets into her hand, she gulped them down with some water. She was obviously too keyed up to sleep. The aspirin would soothe her jangled nerves. Taking two antacid tablets to buffer her stomach against the aspirin, Emily went back to bed, lying on her back, her palms open and flat so the tension in her would drain out.
When she awoke it was almost noon, and the rain was coming down in sheets outside of her bedroom window. It was obviously a day to hole up in bed. But first she needed sustenance. Climbing out of bed she went down to her kitchen. She opened a can of meat ravioli in sauce, dumped it into a grab-it, and nuked it. Essie kept the ravioli for when her grandchildren stopped by. However, comfort food was comfort food. If Emily couldn't have wild sex with Devlin, then ravioli and marshmallow cookies would have to suffice. Putting the bowl on a tray, she rifled through her pantry closet and found the greatest sin of all-something she always hid away for an emergency. She set the double box of Mallomars on the tray, and pulled two small bottles of Pellegrino from her fridge. Napkins. Fork. A little shaker of Parmesan. She carried the tray upstairs.
As she sat in bed consuming the contents of the tray, she wondered if Devlin liked eating in bed. She would serve them an outrageous meal to be eaten here in her bedroom when he came out next weekend. Raw oysters on the half shell, all briney with hot sauce. Lamb chops with asparagus vinaigrette. Fresh local strawberries dipped in dark chocolate, and a bowl of whipped cream for dipping. And they would drink a bottle of Pindar Long Island Spring Splendor, and then make love. Oh, God! She was off on that tangent again. How long until the Channel opened up again? Almost eight hours-worse luck. She'd sleep, and when she woke up again she'd consume the other box of Mallomars for supper, along with her other bottle of Pellegrino. It was a plan.
It was still raining hard when Emily awoke again. The light outside of her bedroom windows was gray. Rolling over, she looked at her clock. Just after seven. Less than an hour until the Channel kicked in. Was she brave enough to let the story flow tonight? She would set her mind to the month before Trahern and Caro married. No. That wouldn't do. She could write a scene like that with her eyes closed. She would set the scene for their wedding night. Caro's first sexual encounter with the sophisticated Trahern. Yes! That would allow her a sexual experience to take the edge off of her own lust for Michael Devlin. But would it? Well, she would soon find out, Emily decided.
Trahern looked like her editor. Emily's subconscious had made him so. But there was just the faintest sense of roughness about the duke that wasn't at all like the smooth and elegant Michael Devlin. The duke was very much a man of his own time period, which was as it should be. There was a hint of danger in the green eyes. He was a man who was very comfortable with who and what he was. And he was a man who would have his own way. Emily shivered. But that was as it should be too. She had made all of her previous heroes far more civilized and urbane than Trahern was. Trahern was almost a throwback to another century. But she liked him, and she knew her readers would fall in love with him to a woman. Bad boys were always far more interesting than good men. Michael Devlin certainly was, she thought with a little grin as she finished consuming the second narrow container of Mallomars. They were half the size Mallomars used to be, she thought, annoyed. But then, she had to suffer only half the guilt because of it.
Emily got up and took the tray downstairs, rinsed the grab-it, and stuck it in the dishwasher. She dumped the evidence of her Mallomar consumption in the garbage, and recycled the two green bottles. Then, returning upstairs, she took a lavish bubble bath, pulled on a clean sleep shirt, and, grabbing the channel changer as the upstairs hall clock struck eight o'clock, she turned on the television. Almost at once she saw a gray stone country church. The scenery about the church proclaimed it full high autumn. The oak and the ash trees were gold and red. The ducal coach drew up before the church. A footman jumped from his perch and hurried to open the door on the right side of the vehicle and let down the steps. Then he handed out Caro Trahern.
She was dressed in a gown of pale blue watered silk. The full skirt had a pleated hemline that hung just off the ground. The fitted bodice and skirt formed a single garment. While the neckline was low, the bride wore a delicate lace fichu that was fastened in front with a beautiful brooch of pearls and gold. The sleeves of the dress were fitted to the elbow, and from them hung the same delicate lace as the fichu. Her shoes were flat-heeled and embroidered with rounded toes. On her head she wore a broad-brimmed hat trimmed in lace and ribbons. And in her hand she carried a posy of rosebuds and lavender tied with matching blue ribbons and lace.
Emily reached out and pressed the enter button on the channel changer as the duchess began to walk into the small church. Music swelled from the small organ that was being vigorously pumped by a rather beefy lad she recognized as the blacksmith's son. Once again she had put herself into the skin of her heroine. The duke awaited her inside the church vestibule. Their eyes met. She took his arm, and together they traversed the center aisle of the little church to where the Reverend Mr. Playfair awaited them. The congregation, Emily noted, was made up of villagers and servants. Caro's second marriage would not be a grand affair, given the fact that she had been widowed for only thirteen months. The ceremony was the simple Anglican one, and over quickly. The bridal couple traversed the aisle.
Outside the Duke and Duchess of Malincourt greeted their villagers, who cheered them off as the open coach awaiting them took them back to Malincourt Hall. The day was so beautiful that Emily felt her eyes fill with tears. Her new husband noticed, said nothing, but put his hand on hers. She looked at him and smiled a weak smile.
"What are you thinking?" he finally asked her.
"Of the day I wed your uncle at St. George's in London," the duchess answered him. "It was June, and the king and queen came. My father hadn't even given me a season, but he and your uncle insisted upon a grand society wedding. They were making a very strong public statement so that my uncle Richard would have no basis for a claim on my inheritance. Of course, I didn't know then that my father intended to kill himself. Your uncle Godric was very good to me, Trahern. But I think if I am to be honest with you, I must say I prefer this wedding day to the other. I am not a woman for show."
"I hope you also prefer this groom to the other," he replied. "And tonight you will have a true wedding night. Something you did not have with my uncle, I know."
The duchess blushed prettily. "Sir, you are too bold," she half whispered.
He leaned over and murmured in her ear, "Surely you know how much I want to make love to you, Caro, my darling. I know you are an innocent, and I shall be patient and gentle. But come tomorrow morning you will be a woman in every sense of the word. I am not my uncle Godric. I am a man in the full flush of his manhood. I desire you very much, Caro. I only hope you desire me too." He kissed her ear softly.
Her cheeks felt very warm. "I have no knowledge of what you expect of me, sir. I would not have you disappointed, but in matters of the heart I am lacking in education."
"And it will be my supreme pleasure to educate you, my darling," he told her.
She could not stop blushing, and was quite relieved to reach the house. There a light repast had been set out for them in the magnificent dining room. They ate in silence, and when they had finished repaired to the family salon. It was late afternoon. The servants had seen to the fires, and the room was comfortable.
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