Rebecca Zanetti - Forgotten Sins

“I didn’t take those early pictures, it just doesn’t make sense.” He ran a rough hand through his thick hair. “Why keep them? Why leave you if I were some crazy stalker and I got you to marry me?”

She’d wondered the same thing. Hope was so freakin’ destructive. “If you didn’t take them, who did?”

“I don’t know. I assume whoever planted the other bugs in your house.” He focused on her, his gray gaze somber. “I need your trust, angel. You’re all I’ve got.”

The vulnerability from such a strong man tempted her far too much. The Shane she thought she’d known would’ve gone after anyone threatening her with a vengeance matched only by furious predators. But he had never shown her a hint of vulnerability. “What do you want from me?” Her voice came out weary. Exhaustion dragged at her limbs.

“You trusted me once.” He slipped his hands into his pockets. “Trust yourself and believe your instincts were on target with me. Give me the chance to figure this out.”

He was the only family she’d ever known. The only person she’d ever loved. How could she not give him the chance? Plus, she couldn’t escape him on her own—he was too good. Appeasing him seemed wise. “I’ll think about it.”

Triumph flashed in his eyes. “Good enough. We’ll move again tomorrow.”

She jumped to her feet, wincing as her toes dug into the rough shag carpet. Who knew what was in the ugly orange fabric? “I have to go to work. I’m in the middle of two audits.” He had to believe her. As much as she hated to admit it, she probably couldn’t get free on her own. “I like my life.” Usually. She’d missed him. So much. But work helped.

He scrubbed both hands over his face. “You’re not safe.”

“I don’t care.” She’d knocked him on his ass, hadn’t she? “I want to help you, I really do. But I’m not losing my life again because of you.” No matter what happened, he’d leave again. To pursue whatever was out there he needed to pursue. Right now that was her. But that would change.

His hands dropped. “Again?”

She breathed out. “Yes. It hurt so bad when you left, I had to leave, too. I couldn’t stay where we’d lived together, to see the places we shared.” Her voice caught. Tears pricked the back of her eyes. She was too damn tired to hide the truth.

His eyes softened. “I’m so sorry. I wish I remembered what happened.”

“What happened was that you needed more. More than me. Something else to keep you going.” He was always so driven. Looking behind them for a threat and ahead for… something. “I didn’t know you well enough. I never did.”

As his wife, she should have the answers he now needed. But she didn’t. “I can’t do it again, Shane.” Starting over would be too much. She’d given him everything, and he’d left… just like Arthur. And Claire. And Mona.

Everyone left.

She wouldn’t set herself up again. At one time, she’d thought Shane was different from the rest. So when he’d deserted her, it had hurt more than all the other times combined. Enough was enough.

The clock on the particleboard nightstand ticked into the silence. “I have a discrepancy in a couple of my accounts, they’re new, and I need to fix it.” Something in her needed to make Arthur proud. Sure, she’d never see him again, but he’d been an amazing accountant. He’d never made a mistake—at least he hadn’t until Claire’s death destroyed him—and he’d taught her a love for numbers. Plus, she had to save Billy. She hadn’t been able to help Mona, but Billy was here and now. She could help him and get that promotion she deserved.

“Please, Shane.” She held his gaze, searching for a way to convince him. “You want me to trust you, and you need to earn that. You can’t take me out of my life. I’ll fight you every step of the way, and you need to concentrate on whoever’s after you.”

Doubt had him shaking his head. “I don’t want to fight you at all.” He sucked in air, dropping to sit on the other bed. The minutes ticked by. “I can’t hide, either. Fine. I’ll take you to work and pick you up. No leaving the building. For any reason. You’ll need to tell Detective Malloy something. About why I released you.”

“I will.” She blinked to stay calm. Shane was trusting her. Not only to keep herself safe but to protect him. Hope flared hot through her. As well as caution. She needed to protect herself from having her heart broken yet again. Although the indecision in his eyes was new. “You’ve changed.”

“It’s been two years. I assume we both have.” He stretched out on the bed, closing his eyes. “Go to sleep. Morning will arrive way too soon.”

Less than a minute and his breathing evened out. She smiled as memories assailed her. He’d always fallen asleep so easily, almost as if he could control it. Almost as if he had to take rest when available.

The smile slid away.

When they’d met, they’d had a lack of family in common. She’d thought he was like her, raised in different foster homes, never quite fitting in. Then the nightmare, when he let the truth slip. He had brothers she’d never met. When she’d asked about them, Shane said they weren’t close, and that had been the end of the subject.

She should’ve pushed harder to understand him. But being alone, relying on herself, that was all she knew. Maybe he wasn’t the only one who’d held back. Perhaps trust earned trust. Throw two broken people together who don’t know how to live with others, and you get pain. What a disaster.

Soft light filtered through the cheap shades, caressing the hard planes of his face. So handsome. Straight nose, rugged cheekbones, and those sensuous lips. But his eyes. Magic and fire lived in their odd gray color. She still saw those in her dreams.

With his amnesia, more of his true self had emerged. The parts of him he’d hidden from her, she could finally see. Was there a chance he might let her into his life? In fact, he was even trusting her. But… what would happen when his memories came back? Would he draw away and break her heart again? Or would he stay?

He twitched. Then gave a low moan. Pain suffused the sound.

Her heart lurched. Her mind spun.

During their brief marriage, although he’d had no clue, she’d learned how to soothe his nightmares. To help him rest and get needed sleep. It was so easy and natural—and just took a soft whisper and touch. No matter who he was, she could only be herself. If he was in pain, she couldn’t sit by and watch. She didn’t want to be a person who’d sit by and watch.

An agonized growl rumbled from his chest.

Oh, this was a bad idea. She crept forward, gingerly resting one knee on his bed. Reaching his side, she snuggled down, her head on his outstretched arm. Warm cedar filled her senses. She placed her hand over his heart. “It’s okay, Shane. Only good dreams tonight,” she whispered. With a soft sigh, she closed her eyes and let darkness take over.

* * *

Shane kept his breathing even, his body relaxed. His heart thumped against her palm. Awakening, he’d heard her move from the bed and had wondered. Would she head for the door? No. She hadn’t. The woman had cuddled up with danger to provide comfort for him. Security. Love.

His heart warmed until it hurt. Vulnerability and need filtered through him, followed by determination. He didn’t know how the hell he’d lost her before. No matter what it took, no matter who he had to walk through, he wouldn’t lose her again.

A truck passed by on the interstate, and he calculated the weight load and speed. A cricket chirped outside, and he identified the species. A woman breathed deep next to him, and he measured her heart rate. With his hearing.

He knew every way to kill a person, and he could do so without hesitating. In fact, hesitating didn’t seem to be part of his makeup. What kind of a monster didn’t feel anything when he killed? People should fear monsters. So far, nothing scared him—nobody could stop him. He closed his eyes against the reality that if his memories came back, he’d be the one thing he feared.

Josie sighed next to him, and he could hear her lungs fill with air.

Jesus. Who the hell was he?

Josie mumbled to herself, her head bent over the figures laid out on her desk. Her head ached. She needed to get dimmers on the lights in her office. The room was almost perfect with the thick desk she’d chosen to match the chairs. Prints of famous Western oil paintings lined the walls.

Although it had taken her all day and several pots of coffee, she’d found one of the problems in the Larson Corporation file—a mistake in the revenue figures. How freaking high had Billy been the last year while doing the corporation’s books? This was malpractice and not some minor math mistake. She’d have to meet with the client soon.

She tugged her gray skirt smooth. Thank goodness she’d had a change of clothing and makeup bag at work.

A blond head poked in the door. “I’m heading home, boss.”

Josie glanced up and forced a smile for her secretary. “Home or out for some fun?”

Vicki grinned and stepped inside. She’d removed her blue jacket to reveal a sleek black dress. “Out for some fun. Want to go?”

Not in a million years. They might be about the same age, but Josie felt decades older. “No, thanks.” Until Shane picked her up. While she still didn’t trust him, he could keep her safe from whoever was after him—and thus keep Tom safe. The two men who’d tried to attack Tom’s house would’ve killed him, and she couldn’t let that happen. She focused on her secretary. “I think I’ll work late.”

Vicki shrugged a curvy shoulder. “I figured.” Her thickly mascaraed eyes widened. “Was that cop mad earlier or what?”

“That’s an understatement.” Detective Malloy was no dummy. The story of how she’d gone willingly with Shane had sounded ridiculous, even to her ears. But there wasn’t anything the detective could do, absent taking her into custody. Which apparently he wasn’t ready to do. Though she wouldn’t be surprised to find herself under surveillance. The cop had even more questions about the two men Shane had left trussed up for the police. Because apparently they weren’t cooperating with Malloy.

Vicki wrinkled her forehead, concern glimmering in her eyes. “So are you really staying with Tom Marsh? I mean, now that your husband is in town?”

Josie shifted in her chair. “I didn’t tell anyone about my husband because I’m getting a divorce.” All she needed was a guilt trip from her secretary. “A clean start seemed like a good idea, you know?”

Vicki nodded. “Yeah, I get that. Though staying at Tom’s now is kind of risky, boss.”

Josie rolled her eyes. “Eavesdropping on the detective?”

Vicki giggled. “He was yelling at you. It was hard not to eavesdrop.”

Yeah, Josie had lied to the detective. Was that against the law? She needed to Google “false statements to police officials.” Wasn’t it a crime only if they were federal agents instead of county officials? “I’m not staying with Tom any longer. Have fun tonight, Vicki.” Happy hunting.

Vicki nodded and then glanced to the side. “Hi ya, Tom.” She winked at Josie and headed toward the elevators.

Tom nodded absently and stalked into the room to drop into a guest chair. A rip marred the work shirt which he filled quite nicely. The guy was religious about using the building’s gym. “Are you sure you’re all right?”

Josie nodded. They’d had this discussion via telephone several times during the day. “Yes. I told you, Shane left town.” The lie fell easily from her lips. Growing up in foster care, she’d learned to lie early and well. Just to keep people happy. “Detective Malloy is setting me up somewhere safe until we know for sure.” Another lie.

Tom kicked his legs out, crossing scuffed work boots at the ankles. “Why are you at work?”

“I can’t hide. Plus, I need to fix these books.”

Tom’s grin brightened the room. “I’m pretty sure that didn’t come out right.”

Josie laughed, her shoulders relaxing for the first time that day. “Good point. I didn’t mean that, and you’re above accountant jokes.”

He shrugged. “It was an easy one. Sorry I couldn’t be here earlier—rough day. I’m bidding on three different jobs right now.”

“I know what you mean about having a rough day.”

Tom glanced at his watch, a frown settling on his handsome face.

“Do you need to go, Tom?” He had to go. Shane would be there soon.

Tom frowned. “I have a meeting with a pain-in-the-ass client who might want to build a fast-food restaurant, but I don’t want to leave you alone.”