Still, she bore everyone's words with good grace. She knew they meant well, and in the mortal scheme of things, many of these people were considered above her. So she accepted their condolences with a sad smile and either a handshake or a brief embrace, knowing that most of them would never understand what this loss felt like to her.

Once she was done receiving everyone, Esmeralda looked at Charisma who flanked her on one side due to her hostess status. Charisma's eyes wandered over Esmeralda's face, taking in the exhaustion and sadness. Without a word, she took Esmeralda's hand and tucked it into the crook of her elbow, finding Okasa's concerned gaze and nodding towards the stairway. Okasa nodded her agreement and assumed the hostess reins. Charisma led Esmeralda upstairs.

They reached the master bedroom, and Charisma went in first, flicking on a light and crossing to close the curtains. Then she went to the closet and pulled a blanket and pillow from the shelf before turning back to Esmeralda who was now regarding her warily. Charisma gave her a small smile.

"I'm playing the 'mom' card, Es. You're exhausted," motioning to the bed. Esmeralda sat down automatically, but looked at Charisma with confusion.

"But...?" gesturing to the floor and the downstairs area where so many people were still socializing.

"But you need some rest." She knelt and removed Esmeralda's shoes before lifting her feet onto the bed; she smiled when Esmeralda lay down as a matter of course. "I can handle the people downstairs for a little while, and I promise to come wake you before the mass exodus," pulling the cover up to Esmeralda's chin and rubbing her shoulders carefully until the green eyelids fluttered shut. "Trust me to take care of things, Es. It's my job - I'm really good at it." Charisma brushed the back of her hand over Esmeralda's soft cheek. Esmeralda caught the hand in her own.

"Amber?"

"I'll keep an eye on her as well, Es. Or do you want me to send her to you?"

"Thank you, Charisma."

Charisma squeezed the hand she held, then released it and left to find Amber.

************

It wasn't hard - with Esmeralda's departure, the gathering had broken along expected lines. The Senators, except Brianna and Charisma were gathered in Charisma's study. The drivers and office personnel, aside from those who were part of Esmeralda's team, had assembled in the formal living room. Charisma's adult members of extended family and Kay's family were ensconced in the kitchen and Amber and the Angels were in the family room with the kids.

Charisma didn't garner the first ounce of attention when she crossed the threshold; even Adam didn't look up from where he sat on Amber's lap. Charisma chanced to wonder what sort of magic Esmeralda's and Saphira's family had that they could mesmerize those around them so easily. Then Amber saw her and her words ground to a halt as she turned to look at Charisma.

"Senator Tagherty?"

"Charisma please, Amber. Es has asked for you." Amber frowned, and Charisma continued. "She's upstairs laying down. She was so tired...." Amber nodded.

"Thank you, Sen... Charisma." Amber set Adam on his feet, and he ran straight to Charisma.

"Mama? Go see Es?"

Charisma lifted him with a groan. "Maybe you can help me wake her up after she has a little bit of a nap, Sweetie. Es is having a really bad day and we need to let her rest for a little while, okay?"

Adam stared at her for a long moment before nodding his agreement. "'Kay! Can we go find Br'anna?"

"I think Senator Walker went outside for some air," Opal offered. "Maybe Adam and I could go look for her while you and Amber take care of Es?"

Charisma and Adam exchanged a look and then Charisma set him on the floor so he could run to take Opal's hand. "C'mon, Op. Let's go find Br'anna," tugging her towards the door. Then without warning he dropped her hand and ran back to Amber, who knelt down to meet him at his level. Adam threw his arms around her neck. "Love Amber - love Es."

Amber hugged him back gently. "I'll make sure to tell her, Adam." He grinned and ran back to Opal, taking her hand and pulling her from the room. Amber and Charisma turned to leave the room when Harley spoke up.

"Is there anything we can do Aunt Chari?"

Charisma motioned around the room that was filled with behaving, quiet children. "You're doing it, Harley. Thank you." Then she and Amber left the room and headed upstairs.

************

Charisma led Amber to her room and then excused herself to tend to the rest of her guests. Amber waited until she was down the stairs before she opened the door, glad her vision allowed her to see in the near dark. She walked swiftly towards the bed, sitting on the edge and letting her hand rest on Esmeralda's back. Then she settled herself in to wait.

************

Opal had to slow Adam down long enough to put a coat on him before they left the house, but as soon as that chore was accomplished, they headed out into the backyard. The pool was covered, and the garden was only partially visible - the greenery was in place, but much of the color that was so obvious throughout the spring and summer months was yet unplanted. It made it easy to see that Brianna wasn't in the immediate vicinity. It made the pool house the most logical choice of locations, but Opal hesitated to trespass. Then Adam took the decision out of her hands.

"BR'ANNA!!" yelled at the top of his lungs.

Brianna stuck her head out of the pool house door and looked first at Adam, then Opal, before turning her attention back to Adam again.

"Adam? Is there a problem, Sweetheart?"

He shook his head. "Found Br'anna. Love Br'anna."

Brianna smiled. "I love you too, Adam." She looked at Opal. "Was there something...?"

Opal shook her head. "No, Senator Walker. Adam wanted to visit Es, but she's resting, so he decided we needed to find you. I volunteered to help him." She paused a moment, then spoke again. "Is everything all right, Senator? Is there something I can do?"

"No, Opal - thank you. I just needed a little air. I'll be in to say goodbye shortly."

"NO!" Adam exclaimed. "Br'anna come now."

"Adam...."

"Br'anna come," he pleaded, tugging on her hand. "Please?" giving her a beguiling smile. Brianna and Opal swapped eye rolls, then turned their attention to Adam.

"How do you say no to that?" she asked, extending a hand to Adam who took it with alacrity, bouncing on his toes in excitement. "Come on, Adam. Let's go see if Gramma has any hot chocolate on the stove. It's cold enough out here to need some, don't you think?"

He nodded vigorously and took Opal's hand as well. And together they made their way back into the warmth of Charisma's home.


Chapter CII

Amber wasn't sitting by Esmeralda's side for very long before the green eyes fluttered open. Esmeralda remained still for a long moment while Amber continued to gently rub her back; when she was coherent enough to recognize the touch, she deflated just slightly, then turned on her side to meet golden eyes with her own. Amber let her hand fall to the curve of Esmeralda's waist, only her thumb stroking the flesh beneath it.

They held one another's gaze for a number of minutes - silently communicating so many things. Finally, Esmeralda lifted a hand to cover the one resting at her hip and Amber looked down at the warmth enveloping her hand. She sighed.

"I suppose it's time?" a question, but said more like a statement.

Esmeralda nodded although Amber was no longer looking at her to see the motion. "I think so. You know you're gonna have to go first; the rest won't go otherwise."

"This sucks."

Esmeralda gave her a miserable smile and nodded. "It does." No platitudes and no gilding of the truth - just plain, unvarnished facts.

Amber clutched Esmeralda's hand in hers and just held it tightly for a moment. "I want you to know - I'm going to ask to be assigned to you for a while... either as your Guardian or in human form."

"Amber...."

"Es, I can't not do *something*. Please don't ask me to."

Esmeralda sighed and shook her head. "I won't Amber - it would be akin to trying to stop a flood with a bucket and paper towel. But," she added more forcefully, causing Amber to look at her, "if He says no, I expect you to abide by His answer."

Amber huffed, but nodded her head. "All right."

Esmeralda studied her expression, seeing the resignation that meant Amber would keep her word despite her desire to do otherwise. She nodded. "Thank you," she offered quietly, tugging gently on the hand she still held. Amber frowned and put her other hand on the bed to keep from being pulled off-balance.

"Es!!"

"Amber, I want a hug before you go."

Amber's eyes went to her hairline. "Oh. In that case...." She offered Esmeralda her other hand and pulled her into a sitting position. Then she pulled her into a tight hug and held on for dear life for a long time. Eventually, though, Esmeralda pulled back enough to brush a kiss over Amber's cheek. Amber released her hold around Esmeralda's waist to shift her hands to cup her face instead. She kissed her forehead then leaned their foreheads together.

"I know I'm not Saphira, Es, but I love you, okay? So please don't make me have to go through this again for a really long time, all right?"

Esmeralda smiled tenderly. "I'll do my best, Amber... promise."

"Best I can ask then, I guess." She pressed her lips to Esmeralda's forehead once more, then sighed and stood. "I'm sure the girls will stop by to say goodbye before they leave." Esmeralda nodded. Amber looked around the room awkwardly and ran a hand through her hair. "Right," she mumbled and straightened her shoulders. Esmeralda watched as Amber's human clothing melted away to be replaced by her angelic garb. Once the robing was in place, Amber stretched out the wings that had been put away for the short duration she had appeared as a human after Saphira's death. "Ahhh...."

Esmeralda chuckled. "Better?"

Amber snorted. "I'd say you have no idea, but that wouldn't be true. I don't know how the rest of you endure that like you do. The only happy part of it is when it's over."

"True, but in fairness, I think our wings work a little different."

"Ow," Amber grumbled when something popped she wasn't entirely sure was supposed to. "I certainly hope so. One more hug before I go?" she asked, opening her arms and spreading her wings to their maximum reach. Esmeralda nodded and stood.

"I'm gonna miss you, Amber."

"Same here, Little Sister. Love you."

"Love you too. Now go home." And with that, Amber disappeared from sight and was gone.

Esmeralda stood still for another long moment, then drew in a deep breath. She couldn't say it didn't hurt to have to send her family home with no indication of being able to return herself in the near future. But she knew she was right about them leaving her behind. She'd manage - she just wasn't sure what she expected her outcome to be... and she wasn't sure it mattered anymore.

She crossed back over to the bed and folded up the blankets she'd been using, then took it and the pillow and placed them neatly on the chair near the bed. Esmeralda stepped into her shoes, and headed downstairs.

************


"GRAMMA!" Adam cheered as they crossed the threshold into the kitchen from the backyard. It caused every family member in the kitchen to look in their direction and smile when they realized that Adam had managed to reclaim their lost sheep. Brianna tried to appear nonchalant about the whole business, but it was difficult when she was surrounded by the family she felt she had abandoned for the sake of her sanity. And then Okasa was approaching her and Brianna offered a tentative smile. Okasa squeezed her arm briefly before turning to Adam.

"So what brings you to the kitchen?" knowing she would need to go check on the plates of hors d'oeuvres and finger foods that had been set out for the numerous guests still occupying Charisma's home, but glad to be out of the melee for the moment.

"Hot chocolate," Adam said with a grin. "S'cold outside."

Okasa chuckled lightly. "I'd heard rumors to that effect, actually. All right, but you're going to have to be my helper - I don't have any ready."

"Adam good helper," he assured her as he started pulling at the buttons of his coat. Brianna took pity on him and knelt in front of him to remove his outerwear. Almost as if that was some sort of sign, several people started moving around the kitchen. The girls went to take more plates of food into the dining room and two of the boys and Paddy went to check on their various guests. Only Brianna, Okasa, Adam, Opal and Hunter were left in the kitchen. Opal immediately excused herself, citing a need to check with Charisma before she took her leave.