Releasing her lips, I stare into her hypnotic green irises while still cradling her face as if we’re in our own little bubble. “Vivian agreed to move in with me,” I say with a soft voice.

She smiles and nods.

We both turn and I’m not sure if the watery eyes gazing at us are from all the laughter or something else; but in this moment, for the first time in over three years, I don’t see it: pity.

“Man! I can’t believe you stole my girl.” Chance draws the attention away from us. More laughter fills the balmy summer evening air.

“You’re still my backup.” Vivian blows him a kiss.

“Well, I’m happy for you both.” My dad raises his glass. “To Oliver and Vivian, may you never stop finding the humor in life.”

My mom holds up her glass with one hand and wipes a few tears with her other. I know they are happy tears mixed with a few sad ones too. As much as she wants me to move on, I imagine she fears my past is unresolved and could destroy what I have with Vivian. Yet another self-diagnosis. It must be genetic.

“Will we see you two next weekend or do you have other plans for your birthday?” Mom asks.

Vivian looks at me with raised eyebrows. “When’s your birthday?”

I shrug. “Friday, but it’s not a big deal.”

“Hmm.” She puckers her sexy lips to the side. God, I wish I could read her mind. “Well, you’re mine Friday but we’ll be here for dinner next Saturday.”

My mom beams. She’s obviously pleased as Vivian sends an excited smile in her direction. “Perfect. I’ll have all your favorites.”

In what has become Saturday night tradition, we make our way to the chairs around the fire pit and crack open a few more bottles of beer and refill the wine glasses. I could stay here all night watching Vivian chat and laugh with my family like she’s known them her whole life. There’s such an undeniable feeling that she belongs here with me, with all of us. What doesn’t make sense is the soul-crushing detour I took to get to her.

“I need to grab something out of my purse.” She bends over and kisses the corner of my mouth then goes inside.

“She’s amazing.” My mom nods her head.

“She is.” I take a swig of my beer.

“You need to tell—”

“I know.” I try to control the sharp edge to my voice. She’s just looking out for me, but I’m in too good of a mood to think about shit that doesn’t matter tonight. My phone vibrates and I pull it out of my pocket.

Vivian: I’m having an insatiable Boston Kreme craving!

Me: We’re leaving.

She walks out the backdoor, slipping her phone back into her purse.

I stand. “Thanks for yet another great dinner, Mom.”

“Yes, it was wonderful.” Vivian bends down and gives both of my parents each a hug.

Chance stands and pats me on the back. “You two heading home to say your prayers goodnight?” he whispers in my ear.

I can’t help but grin as I smack him across the back of the head. “Shut up.”

“Goodnight, Chance.” Vivian hugs him and he lifts her off the ground.

I clear my throat as I watch the back of her dress ease up her legs to what I and now everyone else knows is her bare ass.

“Relax your balls, Bro. I’m just giving her a hug.”

I grab her and pull her into me. “Hug’s over, Bro.” Chance’s deliberate prodding is easy for me to ignore, except with Vivian. Another self-psychoanalytical discovery. Vivian was going to give her virginity to my younger, less complicated, surprisingly not as fucked-up brother, which makes him a permanent silent threat in my mind.

Walking down the driveway, she slides her hand into my back pocket. “You were an obnoxious tease tonight and if I weren’t having such a Boston Kreme craving I would make you sleep on the couch.”

Where to begin? As I open the car door for her, she looks at me with those innocent eyes, batting her lashes at me, baiting me. Looking around the dead neighborhood illuminated by the distant street lights and hearing only the buzzing and screeching of the nocturnal creatures; I pull her away, close the door, and open the back door instead.

“Get in.”

“What?”

“Get. In.”

She looks around as if doing her own assessment then slides in the backseat and moves to the opposite side as I get in back with her.

“Now,” I begin while unbuttoning my shirt and unfastening my pants, “I’ll get to the irony of you kicking me out of my own bed before you’ve actually moved in with me, in just a minute.”

Swallowing, her chest noticeably rises with each labored breath as she watches me, eyes frozen wide.

“From now on you don’t leave the house until I’ve inspected to see if you’re wearing underwear.” She tries to scoot toward the other door as my hand snakes up her leg, but she can’t go any farther. “Do you understand?” I slide my middle finger into her very wet pussy.

She sucks in a quick breath.

“Do you understand?” I say with a firmer voice as I slip in a second finger.

Her eyes roll back and she nods, releasing a soft moan.

“Good. As for the obnoxious comment, I think you might have been self-reflecting. You drive me crazy—mad crazy, funny crazy, horny crazy … just deliriously crazy. I think you want me to spank you.”

Her eyes fly open.

“I think you like to see how far you can push me. Every word that crosses your sexy lips begs for my reaction. So if I’m sleeping on the couch tonight, you can rest assured that you’ll be underneath me with my dick buried deep inside you.”

With my other hand I slide her dress up to her waist and she bends her left leg letting her shoe slide off then rests her foot on the seat. I’m rock hard and dying to get inside of her. Freeing myself from my briefs, I slip my fingers out and guide my cock into her with a hard thrust.

“Oli!” I silence her with my mouth, and she slips her hands under the back of my shirt and claws my skin.

I’m done talking. I always am when I’m inside her. I can’t think, I can’t speak, and since the first day I laid eyes on her, I think I’ve been waiting to breathe. She’s the exact moment I fall from the sky and emerge from the depths of the ocean—she’s life.

“Oh my God, Oli, I love you so much!”

Her words ignite me as I pound into her beautiful body, intoxicated by her touch, her smell, her taste.

“I love you too, Bro. When you’re done I’ll be in my truck waiting for you to let me out of the driveway.”

I freeze, which is easy to do when Chance’s voice showers us like a bucket of cold water. Vivian’s body goes rigid as she buries her face in my neck.

“Get the fuck out of here!” I look back not realizing I forgot to shut the door behind me as Chance holds up his hands. “Take your time. I’ll be in my truck.” He grins and walks back up the driveway.

“Shit!” I’m so pissed.

Vivian starts giggling with escalating hysteria into my neck. I start to pull out. “What are you doing?” She wraps her legs around my waist to stop me.

“What do you mean, what am I doing?” How can she ask me that?

“I’m not done.”

“My brother just caught us having sex in my parents’ driveway and you want to finish?” I can’t hide the shock in my voice.

“I do.” She kisses me and clenches her legs around me tighter.

“No!” I pull away. “I can’t do this. My brother is sitting in his truck staring at us through his rearview mirror. Hell, he’s probably called my mom and asked her to throw a bag of popcorn in the microwave for him to eat during the show.”

“Mmm, popcorn sounds good too.” She releases her death grip around my waist.

“You’re drunk, aren’t you?”

She pulls her dress down over her legs as I fasten my pants and button my shirt. “No, tipsy maybe, but not drunk.” She opens the door on her side, gets out, and waves to my brother as she walks around to the passenger door.

I climb out of the backseat and wait for her to get in before I shut her door and give Chance the bird. I’m an idiot, she’s trouble, and together we’re … deranged!

Chapter Sixteen

Ghosts

Vivian

In my young naive world I like to believe that Oliver moved back to Cambridge to meet me. It’s a fairy tale enchanted feeling that we were somehow fated to meet. In reality I know something bad happened to him while he was in Portland. I love him so the patient part is easy. However, I’m naturally an inquisitive person so the suspense, no matter how bad it may be, is killing me.

When we lie next to each other in bed, I sense him working up the nerve to tell me something, maybe everything. Then just as quickly as the moment comes, it vanishes and I’m left wondering when. When will he tell me what’s behind that damn locked door? When will he tell me why we sleep on a flat mattress with no pillows? When will he tell me why he has a Harvard education yet spends all day playing in the dirt and working for pennies?

“Maybe you should see if Alex is okay with you leaving your bed here.” Oliver says as we survey my empty bedroom with the exception of my childhood twin bed.

“What if we took it apart and stored it in your spare bedroom?”

“I already have a bed in there.”

“I mean the other one.”

He tenses staring at the bed then turns and walks downstairs.

That went well.

“Hey!”

He stops at the bottom of the stairs. I walk down and hug his back. “I’m sorry.”

Turning, he runs his hands through my hair and stares at me with such pain I feel tears pricking the corners of my eyes and I don’t even know why. I’m on the precipice of waiting for my world to begin and end at the same time.

“It’s none of my business.” He flinches and the last thing I want is to cause him pain, but I have. I reach up on my tiptoes and press my lips to his, then I wait. He moves his mouth with mine and all I want is for him to feel my lucid emotions. He is my forever even if I am nothing more than his now.

“Get a room,” Alex says, coming in the front door.

“You’re back early.”

She hugs me. “Yes, we had to bring Kai back. He’s a mess.”

I let go and look at Oliver to see if he heard her, but he’s too busy talking to Sean. They’re both smiling. I wasn’t sure how Sean would be toward Oliver since he and Kai are such good friends.

“I can’t think about Kai anymore.”

Alex gives me a sad smile. “I know.” She gestures to the boxes sitting by the front door. “When you messaged me that you were moving in with Oliver I didn’t think you meant this weekend.”

I shrug. “I’m there all the time anyway and I don’t have that much stuff so we decided to just do it today.”

“You do realize you’re going to have to tell your parents.”

I nod. “I know. I need to tell my parents a lot of things.”

Alex sighs. “I don’t suppose you’re going to keep paying me rent, huh?”

“Dream on. You’re going to have to actually work with us at The Green Pot a little more often so your parents don’t wonder why you’re suddenly asking for spending money.”

“Yeah, yeah, you’re a traitor, you know. I took you in because you didn’t have a life and you needed a hiding place for a few years and you told me I wouldn’t have to worry about you bringing guys home or not being here to keep an eye on things for me. Now look what you’ve gone and done.”

I flash her a wry grin. “Sorry.”

Alex bumps my arm with her shoulder. “Whatever. Sex looks good on you.”

The room falls silent and two sets of male eyes fall on us. “What are you two looking at? God! Typical men, the only time you’re not selectively deaf is when the words sex, pussy, and tits are mentioned.” Alex rolls her eyes.

“We just heard sex, babe. Did we miss pussy and tits earlier?”

“Shut up!” Alex marches over to Sean and he instinctively protects his balls. She punches him in the arm. “Help Oliver carry theses boxes across the street so Flower and I can have a few minutes alone to compare the size of your penises.”

Both Oliver and Sean divert their eyes to the boxes. Their nervous embarrassment is palpable. “I’m just kidding.” Alex laughs. “We both already know whose is bigger.”

Oliver looks at me with wild eyes, but all I can do is laugh.

“Come on, Flower.” Alex locks arms with me and pulls me to the kitchen.

“You’re terrible.”