Kalli starts to protest, but Kaylie shuts her up with one single glare. She starts to wheel the cart away then stops abruptly. Turning around, Kalli runs back to me and throws her arms around me.

“I’m so glad you’re home big brother. I’ve missed you so much. And I love you. No matter what. Always have, always will,” she whispers. It’s the sentiment that’s been a family saying since we were kids.

Leaning down, I place a kiss on the top of her head. “Love you, Kalliope.”

She gives me a soft smile and then looks at Kaylie with sad eyes. We watch in silence as she walks through the glass doors, taking my gear with her. It’s not until she’s out of sight that I turn towards the remaining twin. I have no idea what the fuck is going on, but I’m not an idiot and I know something’s wrong. Tara should be here. I’m trying to tell myself she just couldn’t get off work, but even that excuse sounds lame in my head.

Kaylie lets out a deep breath then loops her arm through mine. “Let’s go for a drive, okay?”

“Kay, the last thing I want is to go for a drive. One, it’s weird that you got your license while I was gone. And more importantly, I want to know where my fucking fiancée is and I want to know now. Unless you’re taking me to her, save your goddamn drive for another day. I’ll just grab a cab and find her myself.”

Apparently I loosen her resolve because she sighs then nods her head. “Okay, Kale, I’ll take you to her. I know exactly where she is.”


KAYLIE TRIES to make small talk in the car, but after a few noncommittal one-word answers, she decides that I’m a lost cause and stops attempting to get me to engage in conversation. As I stare out the window, we ride in silence, and I can’t help all the horrible thoughts rolling through my head.

I’ve been gone for just a little over three months, and even though I never saw the military in my future, the day I found out that Tara was pregnant, I vowed to do everything in my power to provide love and support for my family. Seeing as how I was just a kid barely out of high school, the military seemed to be the best route for me. We’d been childhood friends, then sweethearts, so when she ended up pregnant, marriage made perfect sense. Mom tried to talk me out of it, saying that it was a new century and there were plenty of unwed parents, but I was head over heels and I wanted to start a family with her, even if it was a hell of a lot sooner than either of us had planned. When I proposed, she cried and said yes, and even though she didn’t want me to leave for the Army, she understood and we had a tearful goodbye at the airport. A smile forms over my face as I remember kneeling down one last time to place a kiss on her belly, where a small bump had started to form.

“Kale, we’re here,” Kaylie informs me, tearing me away from the happy memory.

I glance out the window and frown, turning to her. “This has to be a mistake. What the hell would she be doing at a bar at two in the afternoon?” I ask incredulously, wondering what kind of fucked-up joke she’s playing on me.

Sighing, Kaylie leans her head against the glass. “She’s working. I don’t know the details, but for some reason, after you left, she dropped all her classes at Faulkner State, quit her receptionist job, and started bartending. Just go in and see her, okay? I’m right behind you.”

Her words register in my mind but they make no sense. Tara, bartending? What the hell? Quickly wanting to get to the bottom of this, I’m out of the car in a flash, and I walk with long strides until I make it to the front door of the bar.

My heart’s racing as I open it. I hear the chime signaling my arrival, but no one seems to notice. Not waiting for Kaylie to come in behind me, I let it shut and take two steps until I see her, and I’m frozen in place. Her back’s to me, but I know it’s her, and I watch in utter disbelief as she flirts with some asshole. I tell myself that she’s just doing her job, but then he grabs her ass and she giggles, turning slightly so I can see her flashing him a beautiful smile. She leans and whispers in his ear, causing him to nod his head vigorously. Before I can do anything, she’s walking away, her back still to me, and then she disappears behind the kitchen doors.

The asshole stands up, throws some bills down on the counter, and then starts to head my way. He gives me a tip of his hat as he takes in my uniform. “’Preciate the service, brother,” he tells me before leaning in close. “The chick behind the bar? Be nice to her and I promise she’ll take care of ya, if ya know what I mean.”

What the fuck? Almost as if on instinct, my arms flies out, my fist connecting with his face. He reels back, his hands coming up to his nose to assess the damage.

“What the hell, man? I’m just tryin’ to help a brother out!”

Leaning in, I grab ahold of his collar. “That chick behind the bar? She’s my fucking fiancée, asshole. Not only that, but she’s having my kid, so no, she’s not going to be taking care of anyone.”

His eyes widen, and then the fucker gives me a look that is nothing but pure sympathy. “Oh, man, I had no idea. You serious?” He pauses, and I nod. “Dude, hate to be the one to tell you this, but she ain’t wearin’ a ring. And the girl? She most certainly is not havin’ no baby.”

Tara chooses that exact moment to reenter the bar carrying a thick tub full of ice and beer bottles, effectively covering her middle. I let go of the guy and pull out the teddy bear from my cargo pocket. She doesn’t see me, and I lose sight of her for a moment when she bends to set the tub down. When she stands back up, the sight of her takes my breath away. Stumbling back, I feel the stuffed animal fall from my fingertips as my eyes continuously blink. It’s as if they’re playing tricks on me and I’m not really seeing what I’m seeing. Or well, not seeing.

I feel a hand on my shoulder, and then Kaylie is pressing up against me, her cheek on my back. “I’m so sorry, Kale. I didn’t know how to tell you,” she whispers, her voice cracking.

My head falls and I bring a hand up to meet hers, squeezing tight. I don’t blame her. I probably never would’ve believed it without seeing anyway, but now that I’m here, I can’t deny it. Standing less than twenty feet away from me is Tara Jennings, my childhood best friend, first love, fiancée, and mother of my future child. Only this Tara, the one who should be nearly seven months pregnant, is standing in tight denim shorts with a form-fitting black tank top that rides up on her belly—her unbelievably flat-as-a-board belly. Gone is the baby bump I’d caressed before I left. Gone is any evidence that a baby, my baby, was there not just three months ago.

And now it all makes sense. The letters that became less frequent the longer I was gone. The unanswered calls when I was able to get a phone pass. The airport reunion that never was. She lost the baby and was here to deal with it all on her own. In four long strides, I’m in front of her, and I pull her into my arms and wrap her in a warm embrace. My heart’s breaking for the loss, but it’s equally tearing me apart that she had to deal with the fallout on her own.

Before I can even begin to really feel her, she’s pushing against my chest, out of my arms. Her eyes widen when she looks up at me, and there’s something there. Shame? Regret? I don’t know what it is, but nothing about the look on her face is one that I’d expect from my fiancée when I return home after being away for so long.

Reaching down, I stroke her face, cherishing the feel of her skin under my fingertips. “Why didn’t come to the airport, babe? I’ve missed you,” I admit, leaning in for a kiss, but she turns her face at the last second, forcing me to kiss her cheek instead of her lips.

What the fuck is going on?

A million things start racing through my mind, and I don’t get it. This Tara is distant, unfeeling, nothing like the woman I love, and my heart starts beating rapidly as I look back at my sister, who is watching us with sorrowful eyes.

“Kale, I can’t do this here. We need to talk, but not right now.” She holds her wrist up to glance at her watch, and my eyes widen when I notice her fingers and realize that the asshole was right. My ring is no longer on her finger. “I get off at nine. Can we meet then? At the old swing set?”

Anger courses through me, and there’s no way in hell I’m waiting hours to find out what the hell she’s been up to since I’ve been gone. Taking her hand, I don’t give her a choice as I pull her outside and into the alley next to the building.

Pressing her against the brick wall, I place both hands on the sides of her head. I look down at her, but she won’t meet my eyes. “Show me your left hand, Tara,” I order, growling, and I watch as she flinches, but in the end, she does what I ask. “Where the fuck is my ring?”

Sighing, she finally meets my eyes, her own flashing with something that resembles anger. “I stopped wearing it a while ago,” she states matter-of-factly, like it’s something I should’ve already known.

I take a deep breath, trying to keep my anger at bay. “And why in the hell did you stop wearing it? I don’t understand.”

She pushes me away from her and starts pacing the alley. “Because I didn’t want to get married! Okay?! Is that what you want to hear?! Because that’s the God’s honest truth. After you left, I did a lot of soul searching, and I’m not ready, Kale. We’re not ready! I’m nineteen years old and way too young to be a wife. Way too young to be a mother.” The last part comes out in a whisper, and I begin to feel wary.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” I ask, even though I’m pretty sure I don’t want to know the implications.

She stops in her tracks and looks at me, this time with hardened eyes. “It means I terminated the pregnancy.”

Her cold words cause my knees to buckle and I have to brace myself against the wall to keep from falling to the ground. The pain of thinking she had a miscarriage was nearly unbearable, but now knowing that I’m no longer going to be a dad because Tara decided she didn’t want the baby is an excruciating torment I have no idea how to combat or to even begin to process. My lungs feel heavier with each breath I take, and when I see her coming towards me, I back up and hold a hand out, wanting her to stay away, as far away as possible.

“Kale, I know it’s a shock, and I probably shouldn’t have done it without telling you, but you were out of contact. There was nothing else I could do. But come on. We’re not even twenty. We weren’t ready, and in the end, you’ll see this was for the best. I promise. Now we can just go back to being us, not engaged, not about to be parents. Just Kale and Tara. Like we always have been.”

I look at her in disbelief. “I was out of contact because I was preparing to provide for our family. I signed my fucking life away for you, for the baby. I loved you. I already loved him. I don’t… How the fuck could you do this to me?”

She tries to wrap her arms around me, but I push her off, feeling disgusted by her touch. “It’s better this way. You’ll see. We’ll be better this way.”

Shaking my head, I let out an incredulous laugh. “That’s where you’re wrong, Tara. As far as I’m concerned, there is no more us. And the fact that you can’t see that you just ripped my heart to fucking shreds? There probably never should’ve been.”

She rushes towards me, only stopping when I hold my hand out. “Kale, don’t say that. We can get past this. I do still care about you.”

My eyes close as I let out a deep breath. I let her words wash over me, and my blood begins to boil. I want to scream at her. I want to cry my fucking eyes out. I want to go back three months and never set foot on the damn plane so I could’ve been there to try and at least talk this out with her. But I can’t. I can’t go back, and this can’t be undone. Every single ounce of love I once felt for this girl slowly drains from my heart, and as she stands in front of me, waiting for me to tell her everything is okay, I just can’t do it. I feel nothing but anger, resentment, and honestly, hatred.

I close the distance between us, placing a hand on the back of her neck. She looks up at me with hopeful eyes, and I can’t believe she thinks we—I—can get past this.

“I might’ve believed that before, Tara, but I sure as hell don’t now. I loved you more than life itself, and walking away is going to be so goddamn hard, but if I stay here, I’m just going to feel sick to my stomach every time I look at you. It’ll always be a reminder of what you stole from me, what I can never get back. I’ll just end up hating you more than I do right now, and the magnitude of that is one I don’t think I can take. Truth be told, when I walk out of this alley, I could never see you again and I’d die the happiest man on the planet.”