“I know.” For all his faults, I couldn’t just turn off how I felt. I was worried about him. It was like missing a limb not to have him around anymore. “I tried to smooth things over before he quit the band. When War shuts you out though, you’re out. He’s very black and white about things. You’re either with him or you’re against him.”

“Hmm.” She folded her hands under her chin and looked thoughtful. I had a feeling where she was going before she spoke, and I wasn’t wrong. “Do you remember what I told you when you first got back from Orlando?”

“I remember,” I whispered, thinking she was going to reiterate all the reasons that ending things with Lace made sense. In my mind those reasons still had some merit, but in my heart it felt all fucked up.

“I’m afraid that maybe I gave you some bad advice.”

Surprise widened my eyes as I looked at her.

A frown creased her brow. “I think I’ve let my history with your father color my judgment. So many times he made promises. So many times he broke them. But I kept taking him back, hoping each time that things would be different.”

“I know.”

“I saw that same pattern developing between you and Lace. I’m afraid you love her too much and that she’ll hurt you like your dad hurt me.” Her voice caught.

“He hurt all of us,” I admitted softly.

She nodded.

“Lace isn’t like him.”

“I don’t know that for sure. But I realize now that’s not for me to decide. That’s up to you.”

I was silent for a moment, letting that sink in.

“I told you once that sometimes love means letting go. Maybe that was just my old bitterness welling up. I was trying to protect you, Bryan, when I should have been encouraging you to make your own decisions and live your own life. Take risks even.”

My mom was right. Damn right. Lace was worth the risk. My pride had blinded me from seeing that. I should have admired her strength and how brave it was of her to want to prove herself before we moved forward together.

Instead all I saw was that she was rejecting the glass slipper without even trying it on. Rejecting me. Putting up one more barrier between us. Anger made me throw the past back in her face. Selfishness kept me from agreeing to what was best for her. And sheer stupidity caused me to walk away from the only woman who had ever really mattered to me.

I put my arm around my mom’s shoulder and kissed the top of her head. “The two of you are a lot alike. Both so beautiful. Both so resilient.”

She smiled softly and laid her palm against my cheek. I covered her hand with my own. “I love you, son.” Tears sparkled in her eyes as she looked at me. “You’re a good man. You’ll figure it out. And whatever you decide, I’m behind you.”

40

I heard the haunting acoustic melody as soon as I passed Black Cat’s reception desk on my way in to work. I walked a little faster, trying to balance the backpack on my shoulder and my coffee without spilling it. The somber sound compelled me forward directly toward its source.

In studio six, I found him. His auburn head lifted. Gorgeous emerald eyes that I felt certain I’d seen before stared into mine. Comprehension dawned. No doubt about it. This was Avery’s twin. The physical similarities were striking.

My heart rate kicked into a higher gear as he gazed curiously back at me. He was really good looking if you were into beautifully handsome men, like Michelangelo’s David. Dark and dangerous were more my speed, but I shouldn’t go there. I clamped my mind shut to keep his memory out.

“Don’t stop on my account.” I stepped into the small ten by twelve room. My eyes slid to his guitar with the hummingbird pick guard. “That’s a nice guitar. Really sweet tone. And you play it very well.”

“Thanks.” He slid off his stool with a grin, full lips around a flash of white teeth. “Justin Jones.” He held out his hand.

Duh, I thought, dropping my backpack and moving my coffee to my left hand so I could take it. “Lace Lowell.” I returned his infectious grin, his callouses rough against my skin as our hands touched. If I hadn’t already heard him play, that alone would have clued me into the fact that Avery’s brother wasn’t a casual musician. “We’ve both got the alliteration thing going on with our names, haven’t we?” I laughed.

“Yeah.” He leaned his head to the side as if he was intrigued by me. Well, I sure as hell was intrigued by him. It was really strange. As quickly as I’d taken a dislike to her, I found him to be inexplicably affable.

“Oh, you’re both already here. Good.” Beth, the congenial PR woman for Black Cat, and Mary’s closest confidante as I’d come to realize after only a week around the studio, entered the room and insinuated herself between us. “Mary wants you to work together for a while. She feels that your voices and music sensibilities are compatible.” She handed me some sheet music. “Today she wants you to focus on some covers. Just basic stuff. Dalton will be here after lunch to record, and we’ll go from there. Sound good?”

We both nodded. I turned back to Justin as soon as she was gone. He was looking over my shoulder. Way too close.

“’Roadside,’ huh? Not too bad.”

I took a step away from him. Better get this out of the way. He seemed like a nice guy, but I wasn’t going there. Not with him. Not with anybody else. Not ever again.

Deep inhale.

“Listen, Justin. I’m really looking forward to working with you, but I just need you to know that I’m not interested in anything else, ok?”

He didn’t say anything for a minute. His eyes scanned my face. “Bad breakup?”

I snorted. “Breakup would imply there had been an actual relationship in the first place.” I’d tried for a lighthearted tone, but the ‘feeling sorry for myself tears’ were stinging my eyes. “There’s just a guy that I’m never going to get over, you know?”

“No worries. I promise not to think of you as an entrée if you promise to think of me as a friend.”

I grinned. “I can totally do that.” I’d been so lonely up here in Vancouver. Without the guys, without my brother… I even missed Bridget’s nonstop chatter.

By the end of the second week, Justin and I had already cranked out a half dozen original songs. We were productive in the studio, and enjoyed each other’s company. Like me Justin didn’t seem to be interested in serious relationships. Though I couldn’t help but notice that he had a lot of one-nighters. Anywhere we went women would come on to him and slip him their phone numbers.

We fell into an easy pattern of hanging out together whenever we had free time. Justin was staying at the Sutton also, and I discovered that he felt just as isolated in Vancouver as I did. His sister lived in an apartment near the waterfront, just far enough away to be inconvenient for day to day visiting. Plus she had a busy schedule, thank God. His dad was living on Vancouver Island with his soon to be in-laws.

I shared most of my story with him. We had the common background with substance abuse and appointed ourselves each other’s accountability partners. Since our personalities were a lot alike I wasn’t sure if that was a plus or a minus. We both liked to shop. He was really into men’s fashion. If it hadn’t been for the aforementioned one nighters, I might seriously have wondered which way JJ swung, if you know what I mean.