Susan Phillips - Nobody’s Baby But Mine

She glanced up to see how he’d taken her statement. She didn’t want to throw more guilt in his face; she merely needed him to understand how it had been.

His smile held a hint of sadness, and he brushed the corner of her mouth with his thumb. “Did it turn you against sex for life?”

“Oh, no. I was blessed with a wonderful lover. Maybe a little clumsy when he got started, but it didn’t take him long to get it right.” She smiled.

“I’m glad to hear that.” His thumb trailed over her bottom lip. “You should know right now that I don’t have a lot of sexual experience. I’ve only been with one woman.”

“That’s nice.”

He pushed her hair back from her face on one side with his fingers. “Did anybody ever tell you you’re beautiful? A lot messier than my wife but still a traffic-stopper.”

She laughed. “I couldn’t stop traffic if I had a red light in the middle of my forehead.”

“That just goes to show what you know.” He took her hand and drew her to her feet. As his head dipped, she realized he was going to kiss her.

The brush of his lips was gentle and familiar. He kept his body away from hers so only their mouths touched, along with their hands, which were linked at their sides. Their kiss quickly lost its gentleness and grew urgent with passion. It had been so long for them, and there was so much they needed to express that lay beyond words. But she loved his courtship and wanted more time.

He drew back as if he understood and regarded her with glazed eyes. “I-I have to get back to my office. I’m already going to be late for my afternoon appointments. And when we make love, I don’t want to be rushed.”

She felt heavy-limbed and wobbly with anticipation. She tucked her hand in his as they moved back to the path.

“When you come over for dinner, maybe we’ll have some time to talk, and you can tell me about your work.”

A smile of pure pleasure lit his face. “I’d like that.”

She realized that she couldn’t remember the last time she’d asked him anything beyond a cursory, “How was your day?” This business of listening to each other was going to have to go both ways.

His smile faded, and his forehead creased. “I don’t suppose I could bring my son along when I come to dinner?”

She hesitated for only a moment before she shook her head. “I’m sorry. My mother wouldn’t allow it.”

“Aren’t you a little old to be taking orders from your mother?”

“Sometimes she has a feeling about how things should go. Right now, she has feelings about who should come to the house and who shouldn’t.”

“And my son isn’t welcome?”

She regarded him unhappily. “I’m afraid not. I hope… soon. It’s really in his hands, not Annie’s.”

His jaw set in its familiar stubborn line. “It’s hard to believe you’re letting an old woman who’s half-crazy make decisions about something so important.”

She drew him to a stop and pressed a kiss to the corner of that stubborn jaw.“Maybe she’s not as crazy as you think. After all, she was the one who told me I had to take this walk with you.”

“You wouldn’t have done it otherwise?”

“I don’t know. I have a lot at stake in my life right now, and I don’t want to make a mistake. Sometimes mothers know what’s best for their daughters.” She regarded him levelly. “And their sons.”

He shook his head, and his shoulders slumped in resignation. “All right. I guess I know when I’m in over my head.”

She smiled and had to restrain herself from kissing him again. “We eat early. Six o’clock.”

“I’ll be there.”

L ynn showed Jane off to Jim that night as if she were a beloved child brought before a stranger to display her tricks. She sang Jane’s praises until he began to look dazed, then shooed the two of them into the living room so they could patch up whatever differences remained between them.

As Jane took a seat in Annie’s chair, the resemblance between father and son made her ache, and she wanted to move next to him on the couch and fold herself into those sturdy Cal-like arms. Instead, she drew a deep breath and told him how she had met Cal and what she had done.

“I didn’t write the tabloid article,” she said, when she reached the end of her story, “but nearly every word of it was true.”

She expected his censure.

“I guess Ethan would have a few things to say here about divine providence being responsible for getting you and Cal together,” he said.

He surprised her. “I don’t know about that.”

“You love Cal, don’t you?”

“With all my heart.” She dropped her gaze. “But that doesn’t mean I’m going to be an afterthought in his life.”

“I’m sorry he’s giving you such a hard time. I don’t think he can help it. The men in our family are pretty hard-headed.” He looked uncomfortable. “I guess I have a confession of my own.”

“Oh?”

“I called Sherry Vogler this afternoon.”

“You called my doctor?”

“I couldn’t relax about your pregnancy until I made sure everything was all right. She gave you a clean bill of health, but I couldn’t bully her into telling me whether I have a grandson or a granddaughter on the way. She said you’d decided to wait, and I had to wait, too.” He looked sheepish. “I know I was out of line talking to her behind your back, but I don’t want anything to happen to you. Are you angry?”

She thought of Cherry and Jamie and then of her own father, who’d never seemed to care at all. The next thing she knew, she was smiling. “I’m not angry. Thanks.”

He shook his head and grinned. “You’re a nice lady, Janie Bonner. The old bat was right about you, after all.”

“I heard that!” the old bat called from the next room.

Later that night as Jane lay sleepless in her narrow iron bed, she smiled at the memory of Annie’s indignation. But her smile faded as she thought of all she would be losing when she left here: Jim and Lynn and Annie, these mountains that seemed to be more a part of her every day, and Cal. Except how could she lose something she’d never had?

She wanted to close her eyes and cry her heart out, but she punched the pillow instead and pretended it was Cal. Her anger faded, and she lay back to stare at the ceiling. What was she doing here? Was she subconsciously waiting for him to change his mind and realize he loved her? Today had shown her that wasn’t going to happen.

She remembered the humiliating moment this afternoon when he’d shouted out that he would stay married. His offer had cut her to the quick. The words she’d longed to hear had been uttered on the cusp of his anger, and there hadn’t been an ounce of true meaning behind them.

She made herself face the truth. He might very well come around, but it would be out of duty instead of love because he didn’t feel the same way about her that she felt about him. She had to accept that and start living her life again. It was time for her to leave Heartache Mountain.

The wind had whipped up outside, and the room had grown chilly. Although it was warm under the covers, the cold seemed to have settled into her bones. She curled deeper into the bedclothes and accepted the fact that she had to leave. She’d always be thankful that she’d taken these two weeks for herself, but now she had to stop hiding and resume her life.

Miserable, she finally fell asleep, only to be jolted awake by a crash of thunder and a cold, wet hand settling over her mouth. She sucked in her breath to scream, but the hand clamped down tighter, and a deep, familiar voice whispered in her ear.“Shhh… It’s me.”

Her eyes shot open. A dark shape loomed over her. Wind and rain blew in through the window next to her bed and whipped the curtains against the wall. He eased his hand from her mouth and reached out to close the window just as a boom of thunder shook the house.

Rubber-limbed from the fright he’d given her, she struggled to sit up. “Get out!”

“Lower your voice before Medea shows up with her handmaiden.”

“Don’t you dare say anything bad about either one of them.”

“They’d eat their own children for dinner.”

This was too cruel. Why couldn’t he just leave her alone? “What are you doing here?”

He planted his hands on his hips and scowled down at her. “I came to kidnap you, but it’s wet and cold out there, so I’ll have to do it some other time.”

He lowered himself onto the straight chair that sat at the sewing machine next to her bed. Beads of water glistened in his hair and on his nylon parka. As another flash of lightning lit the room, she saw that he was still just as unshaven and haggard-looking as he’d been this afternoon.

“You planned to kidnap me?”

“You don’t seriously think I’m going to let you stay here much longer with these crazy women, do you?”

“It’s none of your business what I do.”

He ignored that. “I had to talk to you without those vampires listening in. For one thing, you need to stay away from town for the next few days. A couple of reporters have shown up anxious to check out that tabloid article.”

So that was why he’d shown up tonight. Not to bring her a declaration of undying love, but a warning about the press. She struggled to swallow her disappointment.