Marquita Valentine - Not Over You

He paled a little, and then shut the door. “Just remember what I said.”

“As long as you remember what I promised.”

He nodded and she drove away.

She didn’t come back for almost a year, but she had to check on her sisters to make sure they were safe. However, when she came back, Azalea was gone and everyone looked to her to be the new town whore—after all, every small town had one. Only the newest one of Holland Springs had never had consensual sex with any of the men there. She never touched a single one of them. Ever.

Gabriel wrapped his arms around her, taking her out of her head—thank God. “If I could have saved you, I would have.”

“I’m not some fragile doll,” she lied, leaning into him and letting his warmth fill her. “I won’t break.”

“Never thought you to be a doll, but you are fragile, just not in ways you think you should be.” He kissed the top of her head. “And we all have our breaking points.”

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Yes.”

“Do you promise to be honest?” He gave her a come-on-this-is-me look. “How many men do you think I’ve been with?”

He didn’t hesitate when he answered, “It doesn’t matter to me.”

“But I let you think I’ve—”

“Remember our conversation about mathematical impossibilities?” he asked, one dark brow raised.

She blushed, actually blushed, over the memory. “I seem to recall the one about chemistry and biology getting us all hot and bothered.”

He grinned, and then his expression turned serious. “One day, if you still feel the need to tell me how many or how few men you’ve been with, I’m all ears. But for now, I want you to keep it to yourself, because you need to know in my eyes you have always been worthy of everything good in this life.”

Gabriel watched her face as his words sank in. Maybe, just maybe, she would let his words process this time.

“You should probably go,” was all she said, and he tried not to let his disappointment show.

“I should be home before ten, but I’ll call you before I get back.” He let go of her, grabbing his cell phone from the nightstand and pocketing it. “I’ll text you.”

She nodded, and he felt his heart pinch a little. Time, he told himself. They couldn’t erase years of history in only a month. But a selfish part of him wanted her to at least go ahead and try.

“Summer.”

“Hmm.”

“I love you.”

Her brown-eyed, desolate stare nearly ripped him in two. “I know you do, angel.”

As he left the house, he prayed for guidance and strength. He prayed that Summer would see herself the way he saw her, and he prayed for her to receive the forgiveness she didn’t think she deserved. They needed help in the coming days, months, and years.

This he knew, because there was no way either of them could do it on their own.

By the end of July, Rose, Ivy, and Alexander still hadn’t returned from their travels, and Summer was getting restless. Each day she was growing closer to Gabriel, to his family, and to abandoning her plan of getting custody of Ivy back from her sister.

She couldn’t allow that to happen. It was bad enough that she went to church and ate dinner at Gabriel’s parents’ house every Sunday. It was bad enough that she’d gone on couples dates with Jemma Leigh and her husband, Jeremy. It was bad enough that the bells on Carolina Dreams’ door never seemed to quit ringing, and people never stopped smiling. At her.

What was worse though, what was almost unpardonable, was the way she allowed herself to become vulnerable and surrender to Gabriel, like last night.

“Come sit with me and watch the sunset. It’s almost as pretty as you to look at,” he said when she joined him on the patio.

Next thing she knew, he had her in his arms, kissing her hard, and sliding his fingers deep inside of her. “So wet, sweetheart. So wet for me,” he whispered while she’d trembled in his embrace. “Let me take care of you.”

“Yes. Please,” she moaned.

She trusted him to keep his word, because he always did, right down to the littlest of things, like picking up toothpaste for her. Something she could have done it herself, but it was like she was testing him.

Pick me up at five, she would tell him, and he would show up at 4:59.

He brought her flowers every Tuesday. On Thursdays, he would take her to lunch and share the latest software his company had in development, which had led to her point blank asking him how much money he had, if only to make him think she was interested in that and nothing else.

“Not that it’s my business, or that I need it,” she said. “But you never ask me to contribute to paying the bills, and I’m living with you.”

He pulled out his phone, ran his fingers over it, and then handed it to her. She almost dropped the phone. “My money is your money. No secrets. The house is paid for, so our bills are minimal.”

She’d merely nodded and handed it back. “You want to see mine? I don’t have that many numbers in front of the decimal point.”

“Whenever you want,” he said. “If you need help investing it, let me know. I have a buddy down in Charlotte that’s brilliant with numbers. But pretty soon, we need to sit down and go over finances for our future plans.”

The thought of the future scared Summer to death, mostly because her future had been more about them, and less about her and Ivy. He never brought up her plan to get her daughter back, and she wasn’t sure if he hoped she would forget about it, or would abandon her plan.

Tonight, however, she would put him to the test, instead of making love after dinner, like they usually did. She still couldn’t believe he’d talked her into becoming his dessert after one meal. Since then, she’d made it a point to be his dessert and to make him hers. She was very inventive when she wanted to be, which was all the time with Gabriel.

She couldn’t blame him though. He was making up for twenty-nine years of abstinence.

“That’s the last dish,” Gabriel said, placing it on the drying rack. “Ready for dessert?” He wriggled his brows suggestively.

“I thought we could talk finances tonight.” His face fell, and she almost said forget it, but she had to do this. She had to remind him of why they’d gotten married in the first place. It was only fair. It was the right thing to do, even if it hurt like hell to do it.

“You want to do that right now?”

“I thought it would be a good time to talk about the future.” She swallowed the lump in her throat. “About our future plans.”

His face lit up and the sight of it made that lump return, bigger than before. “We can go in my office, and you can borrow my laptop.” He took her by the hand. “Maybe we can include that in our future purchases, if you want one—but I do have a confession to make.”

“Oh,” she said, heart pounding as they entered his office. She sat down at the table by the windows, and he sat across from her.

Booting up his laptop, he turned the screen to face her and said, “I might have bought you another wedding present. It’ll be delivered tomorrow. So don’t peek at that expense.”

Another present? What could be better than the art kit he’d given her? She grabbed the material of her skirt and twisted. “I don’t want to see your expenses.”

His brows drew together. “Then what do you want to see?”

“I want you to help me pay the legal fees for the lawyer.”

His face grew so dark that she almost ran out of the room. “We’re not getting a divorce.”

“It’s not for that. It’s for Ivy.”

“How much?” His knuckles turned white around the fist he made.

She named the amount left to pay her lawyer. “You can write a check out to Pellum & Foster if you think that would work better.”

“When?”

“By the first of next month. I’ve paid through this one.”

He shut the laptop and rose to his feet, moving to his desk. He opened a drawer, and took out a checkbook, filled out a check, and then tore it off. “Here,” he said, placing it on the top of his desk. “I was thinking about going out tonight. Noah and Carlos invited me to Poor Boy’s, but I told them no, unless you think differently?”

Why did he have to be like this? Any other man would have stormed out, but her husband… he wanted her to know where he was going and who he would be with, and her opinion on the entire invitation. All that served to remind her that he didn’t deserve her for a wife.

“You should go,” she whispered. Go, so I don’t have to see the disappointment in your eyes. She could never stomach his disappointment, one of the reasons why she always left Holland Springs after staying a while. Gabriel would get to her, with only a look.

“Will you be here when I get home?” he asked, and she wanted to cry, because he knew her that well.

“I’m not going anywhere.”

“Not until it’s decided about Ivy.” He sounded so defeated that her heart began to ache for him.

She nodded, biting her lower lip. There was nothing she could say, and what she wanted to say would do nothing to help.

* * *

Gabriel nursed his beer while waiting for his turn at the dartboard.

Noah sat down beside him, after scoring three bulls-eyes in a row. “It feels like we haven’t talked in forever.”

Gabriel gave him a side-eyed glance. “We talk every day at work.”

“Yeah, but only about work stuff.”

“What would you like to talk about, Noah?”

“Nothing.” Noah grinned over the rim of his glass.

Carlos stepped up to the table and tossed the dart on it. “Your turn, angel.”

“Angel Edwards, huh?” Noah made a noise. “Stripper or ninja name?”

“Neither.” Though Summer tended to call him by the nickname when he was nude, or inside her. He swallowed.

Carlos looked at Noah. Together they said, “Stripper name.”

“You guys really need to stay off Facebook.”

“But how else will I find out what people I haven’t talked to in ten years are up to nowadays?” Noah quipped.

“If you haven’t talked to them in ten years, why would you start now?” Gabriel asked, scooping up the darts.

“Because they accepted my friend request.”

“Sound logic.”

“Says the guy who posted over a hundred pictures of his wedding.”

Gabriel’s mouth flattened. Who cares how many pictures he had posted of his and Summer’s wedding? She certainly didn’t. Her not-so-little reminder tonight was loud and clear. She might give him her body, might even laugh with him, and confide some of the things that had bothered her for years, but never would she be his completely.

Yet, he’d given her his word, knowing exactly why she wanted his help, all the while thinking he could change her mind. God, he’d been such an arrogant fool, thinking he could change her anything.

“Sore subject?” Carlos asked.

There was no way he’d talk to them about Summer’s plans. Carlos was half a beer away from saying, I told you so as it was.

Noah didn’t have a clue about Summer at all, his view of the opposite sex was generally positive, no matter their reputation. Besides, there were only two people in his and Summer’s relationship, and neither of them were Noah or Carlos.

“I’m strategizing on how best to win,” Gabriel said instead, and it wasn’t a lie. He really did want to kick Carlos and Noah’s butts. Usually they won. He was horrible at darts in college, and he was just as horrible now, but he didn’t hang out with them to improve his game—obviously.

“If you strategize any longer, they’ll kick us out and start cleaning up.”

Noah snorted. “If the bar starts closing at nine at night, then I need to move to another town.”

Gabriel looked around him, not for the first time noticing how young the bar crowd was—legal yes, but at least seven years younger.

“Have you guys noticed the crowd lately?” Noah suddenly asked, and both he and Carlos leveled their buddy with a look. “I feel old.”

A waitress walked by, wearing low-slung jeans and a halter-top that left nothing to the imagination, but Gabriel pretended he hadn’t seen anything.

“Try thirty, and then talk to me about feeling old,” Carlos said with a grin.

“I will in February,” Noah said, rubbing the back of his neck. “Maybe we should find another place to hang out.”