Shaking my head, I made my way to the cafeteria, hoping that Haley and I would have a little bit of time before her friends showed up. I looked around as I entered the large room, and immediately saw Haley sitting at her table, munching on a bag of dried fruit. So typical.

"Hey." I plopped my backpack down, not having time to hit my locker. She looked up and smiled.

"Howdy. Want some?" I looked at the dried apple pieces she held in her fingers, and my nose scrunched.

"You know, the only thing that looks more gross than dried fruit is jerky. Every time I see it I can’t help but think of King Tut’s mummy." Haley glared at me.

"Thanks. I happen to love jerky." I smiled.

"Oops."

"Okay, so have you thought about this at all?" I sat, tugging the instructions my teacher had given to us for the project.

"No. Here’s what it has to be." She took the packet from me, and began to read.

"So, she wants a comparison experiment of sorts?" She glanced up at me, I nodded. "Okay, well, I really don’t think this will be too difficult, Andi. There are any number of different things you can compare and contrast from a psychological point of view. I mean, how about penis envy versus womb envy? It’s an age-old debate that no one can, as of yet, decide on. Right?" I nodded. "Interested?" Again, I nodded.

"You’re going to help me with this, right?" Her face brightened, her body lifting as she sat a little straighter.

"Really? You want my help totally?" I smiled.

"Totally."

"Nut. Okay. You got it." The room began to fill with noise as it filled with kids, hungry kids. I learned a long time ago that you never keep kids away from food. The table vibrated as books and bags were tossed onto it. I looked around to see Haley’s friends starting to sit down, or head toward the lunch lines. Kelly walked up to stand next to Haley, staring at me. "Hey, girl." Haley put an arm around Kelly’s waist and hugged her.

I gathered my books and backpack, and began to stand. I felt a hand on my arm.

"Stay." I looked to see Haley staring into my eyes, her arm still around Kelly. "Please? Join us?" I looked around at the eyes that stared at me, some curious, others just plain confused as they looked from me to Haley, and back at me. I really wanted to bolt, and badly, but looking into those blue eyes, there was just no way.

"Okay." I sat again, feeling like a microscope slide. She smiled, squeezing my wrist before letting it go. I felt like a stranger in a strange land, surrounded by natives that did not know my language, and I sure as hell did not know there’s.

I realized my lunch was in my locker, but looking around me, I had lost my appetite. Haley pulled her lunch out of her backpack, setting it all out before her on the table. A container filled with something, most likely juice, knowing her, a sandwich, the empty bag from her dried apples, and a napkin. I watched as she prepared the sandwich, squishing it a bit with her palm before she looked up, her eyes meeting mine.

"What?" she asked, bringing the sandwich half-way to her mouth.

"Nothing. I guess I was just wondering why you were abusing the sandwich before you ate it." She shrugged.

"I don’t know." She took a bite, smiled at me as she chewed. I tried to smile back, but I’m not sure how successful I was. My entire body was jolted as someone flopped down on the bench next to me. I turned to see narrowed green eyes staring into mine. My blood froze in my veins, and I fought the urge to growl.

"I know you," James said, the crooked smile on his face that so many girls at Winston loved, and which I hated. "You’re the little twat that kicked me in the nuts." Haley coughed across from me, nearly choking on her sandwich as she looked at me. I glanced at her, then back at James Parker, the meanest asshole in the entire school. God, I had no idea he hung around with Haley.

"Yeah. What of it?" I looked him square in the eye, knowing that if it came down to it, I could squash him like the insect that he was.

"Yeah, Freshman year, you nailed me."

"We’ve established this, James. Care to add anything else?" He sneered, looking me up and down.

"You haven’t changed at all. Don’t most girls get cuter as they get older? You’re still a scrawny little bitch like you were then."

"Jimmy!" I could see Haley out of the corner of my eye, lunch forgotten as she stared at him.

"Go away," he said to her, not even looking at her, his eyes still riveted on me. "I should fuck you up for that."

"Well, maybe you’ll learn to pick on people your own size, next time."

"You little whore. What are you doing at my table? You don’t belong here. Why don’t you just go sit in your little dog pen where you belong."

"Gladly, you piece of shit." I grabbed my backpack, nearly shaking with a mixture of fear and anger, and of course, humiliation. My life wouldn’t be complete without it in my day somewhere.

"Andi, please don’t go." I didn’t even look at Haley as I stood, slinging my pack on my back, and heading out of the cafeteria, calm and collected, just a ruse to hide the boiling blood just below the surface. I wasn’t about to give those bastards the satisfaction of seeing how much James got to me. I wanted to hit a locker so bad, my hand twitching at my side.

I heard my name being called as I made my way into the hall, but I didn’t care to stop. As soon as I’d cleared the cafeteria doors, I broke into a run, needing to get as far away as I could, my boots pounding on the tile as I went, headed toward a little nook made by a section of lockers.

I tore my backpack from my shoulders, and threw it to the ground. God, why did I have to go through this? What was so wrong with me that I was to be the butt of everyone’s jokes? Most days I could just disappear amongst my fellow students, predators like James Parker never even knowing I existed.

"Andi!" I could hear Haley’s steps as she ran down the hall. I didn’t want her to see me this way. I quickly wiped at my eyes, which had quickly become wet. I sniffled, and brought the hem of my sweatshirt up to dry my cheeks. "There you are. God, are you okay?" My back was to her, as I wasn’t ready to face her just yet. I still needed a moment to get myself under control. So, I just nodded. She stepped up behind me, her hand reaching out to touch my shoulder. "I’m so sorry, Andi. I had no idea he’d do something like that. My god, I’m so stunned."

"You?" I turned around, giving her a weak smile. The look on her face just about broke my hears, like she was about to burst into tears. "He and I have a bit of a history."

"So I gathered. What happened?"

"First day of high school, I’m sitting in Mr. Tanner’s class, and you know how he has those desks where the chair is connected to the desk?" she nodded. "Well, I was sitting in my seat, in the front row, minding my own business, and James comes up to me, stares at me, then gets that stupid little grin he has, and lifts the entire desk."

"Oh, Andi." I could hear the sadness in her voice.

"I’m at a new school, unfortunately in classes with older kids, and idiots like that who feed on the fear and humiliation of others. My feet can’t even touch the floor anymore, and the desk behind me is digging into my back, the other kids are laughing at me, so I told him to put me down. He only lifts higher, succeeding in knocking me backwards, my head pushing the other desk out of the way as I fall. The class erupts into laughter, fingers pointing at me, led by your buddy, Jimmy. So, I stand and walk up to him, and he’s a pretty big guy." Haley smiles and nods. "I kicked him in the nuts."

"You really did that?" she asked.

"Hell, yeah, I did."

"He absolutely deserved it." Haley took me by the arm, and lead me to the lockers, and sat. I followed suit, curling myself up, knees to my chest, arms tucked into my body. I felt so vulnerable as I told her that story. "I’m so sorry. God, I just feel like such a bitch."

"Why? You didn’t do anything."

"Didn’t I?" She looked at me, looking miserable. "Andi, you’re not comfortable around my friends, understandably so with Jimmy, yet I keep trying to pull you in. You know, it’s like I’m trying to kill two birds with one stone; spend time with you and them by incorporating you into my little group. Part of me feels like I have this duty to show you that life can be fun." She smiled at me, I smiled back.

"Believe me, I have enough fun on my own, Haley. I don’t need to spend a fun-filled lunch with James Parker for that."

"Yeah, I guess you don’t." She sighed, running a hand through her hair, pushing the dark strands behind an ear. "I’m so sorry about today, Andi. It was completely unacceptable of him, and I just feel horrible to put you through that. I am really sorry."

"It’s okay. What can you do, you know? I think we’re all created to fill certain roles, and the popular chick, I was not meant to be."

"It shouldn’t be that way. I mean, not to sound like some poster for peace, but why can’t we all just get along?"

"Because then life would be boring." She chuckled ruefully.

"Yeah." With a groan, Haley stood, wiping off the butt of her jeans as she did. She looked down at me. "Are you going to go back in there?" I shook my head.

"No. Anything I need is right here." I patted my backpack that lay not far from me.

"Okay. Well, the bell is going to ring soon, and I need to get my stuff from the cafeteria. Can I get you anything while I’m in there? I mean, you didn’t even get to eat."

"No. I’m not real hungry."

"Okay." She just looked at me, and I wondered what was going through her mind. "Well, I’ll see you after school when I give you a ride home. Got that?" I grinned, nodded.

The day went by quickly as I threw myself into my classes, using the concentration techniques that I had been taught for over a decade. James Parker wasn’t worth my spit, let alone brain power. The day would end, and so would the week.

I slammed my locker shut, slinging my backpack over my shoulder, and began to walk toward the main hall when I caught Parker out of the corner of my eye. He was talking to someone, and he did not look happy. I was shocked to see that the person he was talking to was Haley. I took a few steps closer, dying to know what was being said.

"What the fuck’s your problem, Haley? She’s nothing. Damn."

"You’re a sick bastard, Jimmy. Why do you get off on other people’s pain? Andi is my friend, so don’t you ever do what you did today again. You got me?" She poked him in the chest.

"Ow, what did I do?" She stared at him, incredulous.

"You need help." She muttered as she turned away from him, headed in the direction of her locker. He watched her go, then shook his head as he walked in another direction. My gaze searched for Haley in the crowded hall, but I had lost her. A slow smile spread across my face.

* * *

We had decided that Haley would meet me at the dojang since I had to be there so early. Sabum Nim Kyung had talked with us, giving everyone their assignment. Since I was one of the few not going for the next belt, I would be the main sparring partner among the higher ranking students.

"God, I hate these," Tracy said, adjusting her ti. Today she would be trying for her first degree black belt today, so this was a big moment for her. I knew she would get it, and had tried to be as supportive as possible.

"Charyot!" Everyone came to attention, lining up in our rows, bowing to the Sabum Nim. "Those of you in trials today, stay. The rest, go."

I stood, bowed, and headed toward the front of the massive room, deciding to warm up with some patterns, slowly easing into the more difficult, intricate kicks and punches. I always lost myself once I started, the world just receding away from my awareness so that all I felt was the energy flowing through me, matching my breathing with the slow pulse, eyes closed as I tried to feel my opponent.

"Hey."

I swung around, feeling my wrist come into solid contact with something just as solid. My eyes shot open to see Haley standing before me, holding her shoulder, eyes huge.

"Ah, jeez. I’m sorry. Are you okay?" I hurried over to her. "Let me see that." She removed her hand, and I felt her shoulder. "I think you’ll just have a good bruise there." I grinned. "Do you walk out in front of moving cars?" She narrowed her brows.

"What?"

"Well, that’s essentially what you did just now. Don’t ever sneak up behind a warrior."