J. Huss - PANIC

They hit him again and this time he falls to the floor and his cheek lands right on the grate above me.

I suck in a long breath.

His eyes shift downward.

At first I think he can’t see me. And then his expression morphs though several different phases. Shock. Grimace. Anger.

And then nothing.

We open our mouths at the same time, but only he speaks. “I’ll never tell,” he says, looking me straight in the eye.

What? Is he talking to me?

One of the guys kicks him in the ribs and he spits out more blood. This time it clings to the rusty grate and drips down.

Please, God, I pray. Please don’t let me be caught here with these men.

“I won’t tell,” he says in a low voice. “I won’t tell.”

“You’ll tell, asshole. Because we’re gonna beat the living shit out of you if you don’t,” one of the other guys says.

“They ransacked the baby’s room, but I cleaned it up as best I could,” he chokes out. And then he whispers so softly I almost miss it. “I swear it was an accident. I swear to God, it was an accident.”

He is talking to me. I sink back against the wall and try to hold my tears in.

“Yeah, yeah, your dead baby’s room. We’ve already heard about it. Now you either tell us where the shit is, Jon, or we’ll go get that little raven of yours next. And if she thinks what you did to her was bad, she’s in for a surprise. I have a guy in Columbia who’ll pay a half a million for a girl like her. I can pick her up and have her sold before anyone knows she’s gone. We’ve got her boyfriend in jail, and she’s on the run from the other two, just like we planned. Hell, they might not even miss her. Might just figure she moved on and found a new place to hide.”

Jon coughs again and more blood comes up. “I’m so sorry,” he breathes, again so low it almost doesn’t exist. He stops for a moment, his eyes still looking down at me. “I’m sorry. You’ll just have to kill me, boys.” And then his gaze finds the iPhone in a hazy beam of light that slips past his body and hits it in just such a way as to create a glint. He smiles for a moment, the blood spilling out of his mouth, and I quickly reach out and move the phone slightly just as Jon rolls himself over.

“It’s not here, Agent Abelli,” he says loudly. Plenty loud for the phone camera to pick up the name. “I gave it to the media, so just do what you want, I’ve got nothing to give you. Nothing at all.”

I close my eyes and put my fingers in my ears after that. They beat him, they kick him, they lift up his head and crack it against the grate so hard pieces of blood and bone from his cheek spray down on me.

His screams fill the basement and then, gradually, they turn to moans.

And even though I spent years wishing I could make him writhe in pain like that, it brings me no comfort.

I hate this. I hate everything about this. It makes me sick.

But I’m forced to listen for what seems like an eternity as they pummel him, knock him unconscious, bring him back, and then do it again. Until finally, he’s unable to be brought back and there is a moment of heavy silence when everyone realizes it’s over.

“Shoot him to make sure he’s dead then burn this place down. I’ll be in the car,” the Abelli voice says as he walks away. “If he’s hidden anything here, it’ll all go up in flames.”

That Abelli guy doesn’t even make it to the basement stairs before the gunshot rings out and pieces of Jon splatter down into the hole.

I clamp my hand over my mouth and close my eyes tight as the smell of gasoline fills the basement.

I wait for the whoosh of flame and then the heavy footsteps of the other man going back upstairs. I frantically push against the grate so I can climb out, but Jon’s body is in the way.

My breath starts coming in ragged gasps as the smoke fills the basement and I start to panic, my chest hitching as I try to take in air and push against Jon’s body. I’m ready to give up when I think of Ronin’s words the last time I saw him. Don’t panic, Gidget.

Calm down, Rook, and push for fuck’s sake!

I get to my feet, still crouched down, and push my shoulder up against the grate.

It moves, barely, but it moves. So I do it again and Jon’s body rolls a little. I do it again and again and again.

And finally the grate flips on its side.

I reach up, push the grate across the floor, and then shove Jon’s body until he’s clear of the hole in the floor. I’m so filled with adrenaline and fear trying to make my escape, I almost forget the phone and everything I came for. I grab the key from my pocket and try my best to steady my shaking hand as I insert it into the lock. For a second it refuses to engage and I swear to God, I almost have a panic attack. My whole plan flashes before my eyes and I feel the crush of defeat.

Keep calm, Gidget. Don’t panic. Ronin’s voice in my head soothes me and I take a deep breath, push the key in farther and feel it click into place. I turn it and swing the metal door of the safe open.

I scan the contents then stuff all of it inside my jacket pocket and pull myself back up into the basement. The smoke is so thick I can’t even see the stairs and the flames are too high that way to even consider escaping. I panic again.

No, be still.

“How will I get out?” I ask Ronin’s voice in my head. I look over at the window, already coughing and gasping as the thick smoke penetrates into my lungs. But it’s just one of those small basement windows. And this house is too old to have a window well as a fire escape. My eyes dart around, panic starting to consume me again, when I spy the coal chute. And then I’m lifting up the metal door and shoving myself inside.

The negative pressure from outside sucks the fire in my direction and the flames are nipping at my boots before I’m even halfway up.

I scream from the heat and then the outside chute opens, forcing the flames to lick up against my legs even higher. Two hands reach down to grab my wrists. It never even occurred to me that those bad guys might still be around, but it’s too late now.

The hands pull me up with force and then the fresh air rushes into my lungs and the heat on my legs is replaced with cool autumn air.

I land in a heap at the feet of some biker boots.

And when I look up Spencer Shrike is shaking his head at me. “I’m gonna tell Ronin what you did and he’s gonna spank the shit out of you for this.”

I pat my jacket as he lifts me up and pulls me back towards the woods. “I have so much proof,” I cough out as I half-limp, half-run from the burning pain in my lower legs as Spence and I make our way through the nature preserve.

And when I look back at the burning house I realize something…

All my old demons are going up in flames with that piece-of-shit place.

I’m finally free to fight another battle.

And I’ve got a team to help me. 

Spencer and I trek all the way back through the woods, me coughing so hard I keep looking around to make sure no one is gonna come kill us because I can’t be quiet.

“Don’t worry, Rook, Ford’s just up ahead with the van. He’s got your bike loaded and I saw those assholes back there leave, we’re cool.”

“How’d you know where I was?”

He chuckles and grabs my arm hard, saving me from a nasty fall that could’ve made the pain in my burned legs unbearable after I trip over a tree root. “I put a tracker on your bike and your jacket. You’re not gonna get away from us that easy, chick. We’re a team, remember?”

“But you’re not allowed to help.”

He glares down at me for a moment and then the hard expression in his eyes softens a little. “We have rules for a reason, Rook. You could’ve really fucked things up. You could’ve been killed, you could’ve—”

“OK, I get it. But Spencer—” I stop and pull on his leather jacket to make him stop with me. “If you knew what I got out of that house you wouldn’t be angry with me.”

“You’re wrong. If they knew you were there they would’ve killed you, you almost got burned alive. You got lucky, Rook. And we’re all pretty attached to you. Ronin will get himself out of this eventually. And when he does, the last thing he wants to hear is that the girl he’s gonna marry died doing something stupid.”

I stay quiet and just limp along after that. We exit the forest a few hundred yards down from where I went in and there’s a large white van waiting for us. Ford gets out of the driver’s seat with a gun in his hand, not even trying to hide it. Spencer and I are walking casually across the parking lot when Ford’s expression rests on me.

I stop dead in my tracks, making Spence stumble. “He’s mad at me.”

“Damn right he’s mad at you. And you deserve it.” Spencer pulls on me hard and hands me off to Ford, then walks over to the driver’s side and gets in.

I look up at Ford and try a pouty frown.

“Save that shit for Ronin. It won’t work on me. I am not talking to you. You scared the fuck out of us, you made me drive a thousand miles in a van alone with Spencer. You missed your university application deadline, and most of all, you didn’t trust me enough to help you.”

Ford takes my arm and pushes me over to the van, opens the door, and barks, “Get in. Sit on the floor between Spencer and me, there’s only room for two up front and I don’t even trust you enough to stay out of trouble locked in back with the bike right now.”

I do what I’m told. They did come get me after all. And my skin might be falling off from the burns instead of screaming at me from the pain if Spence hadn’t pulled me up out of the coal chute. There’s a small space behind the two front seats and a few sleeping bags lying longways on the floor, so I just lie down, stretch out, and let out a long breath. “I might need to go to the hospital. My legs really hurt.”

Spencer has already started rolling and Ford is just getting settled when this comes out. The van stops short and they both look down at me. “What do you mean?” Spencer asks, so I scoot around so I can prop my leg up on Ford’s thigh.

“I’m burned from the fire.” They both look down at my jeans, charred and with a few holes in them, and then Ford lifts up my pant leg and winces.

“Shit, Rook.”

“Is it bad?” I ask. “It hurts.”

“Drive, Spencer. I’ll check it out.” Ford lifts up my pant leg and unties my boot and slips it off, then asks for the other leg. “Take off your pants, Rook. Spencer, we need to find a drug store.”

“Is it bad?” I ask again as I wiggle out of my jeans, trying my best not to cry out as the rough fabric rubs against my red skin. Ford doesn’t even glance down at my goods, just lifts my foot back up. And why should he look? He’s seen me naked so often it hardly matters.

“No, I don’t think so,” he says, patting the skin on my calf gently, but not gentle enough to keep me from wincing. “It’s like a really bad sunburn, but if we find a drug store I know what will make it feel better.” And then he smiles and I lie back and relax.

I’m forgiven. His worry about me outweighs his anger.

I reach into my jacket pocket and pull out the contents of the basement box and my new iPhone and hand it up to him. “Here, Ford. I think this will help us get Ronin out.”

One eyebrow raises. “Is that why you ran?”

“I didn’t run, I just… left. To go get this stuff. And I did trust you, Ford. I trusted that you guys were telling the truth when you said you weren’t gonna help Ronin. So I’m sorry. But I know what these people want. Jon was into some really bad shit and he made me help him hide a whole bunch of evidence in case his partners ever turned on him. It implicates a lot of very important people in the buying and selling of girls to rich clients all over the world. That FBI guy in the house with Jon was involved—”

“What?” they both say together.

“Jon?” Ford asks.

“FBI guy?” Spencer adds.

I gulp some air and swallow, not quite ready to talk about what just happened but knowing I have to anyway. “Some guy named Abelli was the one in charge here and somehow he got Jon out of jail so he could make him give up the evidence. I was hiding in the floor grate, that’s where Jon and I made a safe place a couple years ago and put that stuff.” I nod at the flash drives in Ford’s hand. “Jon’s dead now though. They beat him until he was unconscious because he wouldn’t tell them where it was hidden. And then they shot him and set the house on fire to cover it up.” I leave out the part about Jon apologizing and saving my life. I’m not sure how to process that just yet.