"I should never presume to advise you on such a matter."

"I knew it."

"This decision shall be entirely in your hands."

How rare for a Princess sought in marriage to have the chance of making her own decision! Who else in the world, but Sophia Charlotte, would have made this possible? But to force anyone to marriage would be against all those principles which had been discussed so freely in the gardens of Lutzenburg.

Caroline was torn with doubts and fears. She wanted to stay with Sophia Charlotte; she didn't want life to change. That was clear enough. And yet did she want to remain unmarried all her life? She had discovered that she was ambitious and to be the Queen of Spain would have been a glittering future for any princess.

Glittering prospects in exchange for the love and companionship of Sophia Charlotte. It was a bitter choice.

There was one fact to which she clung. She must become a Catholic. Thank God she did not have to give an immediate answer. And while she battled with her emotions she could talk of the difficulties of changing her religion.

The King of Prussia was impatient.

"You must be mad," he said, "if you don't accept this offer. I can tell you, princes and ministers have been known to change their minds. While you prevaricate they may be looking elsewhere. The best thing you can do is say you are eager to change your religion and are ready to receive immediate instruction."

"But I am not ready and I am as yet undecided."

"Do you expect me to tell the Elector Palatine that?"

"You must tell him the truth, I suppose."

"You set a high value on yourself."

"I have been taught to be truthful and I cannot change my ideas of religion for the sake of a possible crown."

"It is all this talk you have listened to."

But he dared not force her to accept. Sophia Charlotte would never forgive him if he did.

So he met the Elector Palatine and told him that Caroline needed time to come to a decision about her religion and as a result the Elector sent Father Orban, his Jesuit confessor, to Lutzenburg to instruct Caroline and show her that the Catholic Faith was the only true one.

The Electress Sophia, hearing that the Archduke Charles had made Caroline an offer, came to visit Lutzenburg.

When she saw Caroline she was not surprised that the Archduke was eager for the marriage.

"She reminds me more than ever of what you were at her age," she told her daughter. "So, they are going to make a Catholic of her!"

"If she will become one," Sophia Charlotte reminded her mother.

"Surely anyone in their right senses would be ready to say a few masses for the sake of a crown?"

"You are cynical. Mother."

"I call it being reasonable."

"You have never been a religious woman."

"And have you?"

"I have never been able to see that one way is all good the other all bad. There are so many sides to all questions."

"And so you have talked and talked with your philosophers to try and find the answers. How have you succeeded?"

"Not with any real success. We always seem to arrive back at the point where we started. The answer is: 'It may be this, it may be that, but the truth is wrapped in doubt.* And until I die I shall not be sure what happens after death."

"And Caroline?"

"She believes as I do."

"So..."

"I am uncertain. It is a brilliant offer."

"Queen of Spain," mused the old Electress. "But he has to win his own crown before he has one to place on her head. But still she'd be a Queen of Spain if he is victorious. I can think of a crown I'd rather wear."

Sophia Charlotte smiled at her mother. "Might it be the crown of England?"

"I'd like to see George Augustus married. I'd say he has as much likelihood of getting a crown as Master Archduke Charles."

"Do you mean you would like Caroline for George Augustus?"

"Why not? She would not have to change her religion for him."

"But the changing of religion does not shock you. I remember you had me brought up in such a manner that you could pop me either into Catholicism or Protestantism at a moment's decision, according to the offers you received for me. A Catholic Prince and then it would be 'Oh she is a Catholic'. A better offer from a Protestant and 'All her life she has been a Protestant.' Worldly wise and theologically deplorable."

"And, my darling, what happened? I have the best of daughters."

"You were determined to do the best for me as I am for Caroline. Our views differ. As I see it she shall not be forced into marriage. I despair of losing her, yet I shall make no effort to detain her. She has been brought up to respect the freedom of individuals. Now she shall have it and use it as she will."

The old Electress's shrewd eyes were speculative.

She wanted this girl for her daughter-in-law. She would say nothing to her as yet. George Augustus had not a good reputation and this girl had been brought up to make her own decisions. But a little persuasion would be reasonable ... and worldly wise.

Caroline listened to the words of Father Orban.

The Catholic Faith was the true faith, the only faith, and only by adhering to it could she enter the Kingdom of Heaven. "This is the undefiled, the genuine, the pure holy truth. Break from the heretics and for the sake of your soul cling to the truth...."

Caroline was thinking: I should be Queen of Spain. And she saw herself riding through the streets of Madrid; she heard the shouts of the people. "Long live the Queen of Spain. Long live Queen Caroline! "

And the young man who would ride beside her was pleasant and courteous.

She would have children ... and when she held the first of them in her arms the pain of separation would begin to be numbed. She would love the child as she loved Sophia Charlotte and all her hopes and ambitions would be for her son.

Poor Father Orban! He was so earnest. He did not know that she had heard those arguments again and again and that they meant nothing to her. She doubted she would ever be truly religious.

When she left Father Orban she would walk in the gardens with Leibniz.

"You will never accept the Catholic Faith," he told her.

"Is it necessary to do so to call yourself a Catholic?"

"Do you think you would care for life in Spain?"

He looked at her shrewdly. How much did she know of his inner thoughts? They had made a clever girl of their Caroline . . . he, Sophia Charlotte and their friends.

The Electress Sophia was against the marriage. He knew why. She wanted Caroline for Hanover. What a better prospect for Caroline ... and Leibniz ... for Sophia Charlotte ... for them all!

It was not exactly selfish to work for Hanover and against Spain. What future would there be for a free thinker in Spain, the land of the Inquisition and bigotry? Better to have accepted the custodianship of the Vatican and become a servant of the Pope than go to Spain.

"If you remember all the conversations we have had here, if they have meant anything to you, you will never go to Spain."

No, she thought in the solitude of her room, I shall never go to Spain.

Sophia Charlotte showed her a letter she had received from the Elector Palatine.

He knew, he wrote, that Caroline was being instructed in the Catholic faith by Father Orban, but the Father was a little disappointed by the obstruction she put forward. She seemed to make argument rather than accept instruction. The Elector Palatine knew that Caroline was an unusually intelligent young woman and it was partly for this reason that they were anxious for her to marry the Archduke, but they believed in Austria that she was being a little recalcitrant. If Charlotte Sophia would persuade her, for, as Caroline's guardian, she must rejoice in this brilliant offer which was being put before her, if she would point out the advantages of becoming a Catholic, the Elector Palatine was sure that Her Serene Highness the Princess of Ansbach would see good sense the quicker.

"And this is my answer," said Sophia Charlotte showing it to Caroline.

The Queen of Prussia thanked the Elector Palatine for his letter but it was her firm belief that the matter of choosing religion was a choice—like that of marriage—which should be left to the individual and she would do nothing to persuade Her Serene Highness, the Princess of Ansbach, to make her choice. It must rest entirely with her.

"It's true, my dearest," said Sophia Charlotte; "the choice must be yours."

The Electress Sophia talked to Caroline. She implored her to make a wise decision; she herself had always felt the Catholics to be too fanatical for her taste; and she had heard such sad tales of the way Protestants were persecuted in Spain. It was, as her daughter Sophia Charlotte reiterated so often, for Caroline to make the choice, but there were matters she should consider very carefully.

"Spain is a great country. It would be an honour to be its Queen but it could not compare with the honour of being Queen of England, and England would want a Protestant Queen. I always knew it and I believe the English to be right."

The Electress Sophia felt frustrated for how could she tell Caroline that she wanted her to be the bride of her own grandson before she had discussed this matter with her son.

She thought she ought to go back to Hanover without delay and talk over the matter with George Lewis. She believed she could persuade him easily for he was not deeply interested in his son.

She wished she could say openly, instead of by hints, that Caroline should refuse the match with Spain for she might have a more brilliant possibility presented to her before long.

Sophia Charlotte said goodbye to her mother and promised to visit her soon.

"For," said the Electress Sophia, "you have allowed this matter to worry you and you are not looking as well as I should like to see you."

Get her to Hanover, thought the Electress, and there discuss the desirability of keeping Caroline in their own intimate circle.

Caroline listened to Father Orban. He spoke so earnestly that he was almost convincing. Then she would walk with Gottfried Leibniz and he would be even more so.

Sophia Charlotte did not want her to go.

Of course I shall never leave her, thought Caroline.

She was not sleeping as well as she usually did. She was haunted by dreams of the past mingling with thoughts of the future. Once she dreamed she saw the Queen of Spain being crowned. She thought it was herself until she saw her mother's face under the diadem.

No, she thought, I shall never go to Spain. In any case he is not yet King; and the King of France is determined that he never shall be; and the King of France is surely one of the most powerful men in the world.*

There came a letter from her brother who, on the death of their stepbrother had become Margrave of Ansbach.

"I have heard of your difficulties," he wrote. "Why not come and stay awhile in Ansbach? Here you can live quietly, away from all controversy. It would be a good place in which to make your decision."

When she showed this invitation to Sophia Charlotte, the latter thought it would be an excellent idea for her to go and stay for a short while with her brother. They had seen so little of each other and the invitation was cordial. Moreover it would be a good idea for her to get right away from Lutzenburg to make her decision. There she would discover more easily what she wanted to do.

So Caroline decided she would go to Ansbach for a short stay.

While Caroline had been the centre of attraction, Frederick William, piqued to find himself in the shade, had been behaving with more than his usual arrogance. Sophia Charlotte, who secretly had been feeling less well as each week passed and doing her utmost to hide this fact, agreed with the King that perhaps a tour of foreign countries might teach their son better manners.

She hated parting with him for she loved him dearly and tried to convince herself that he would outgrow his violent temper and arrogant ways, for she, who was so eager to discover the truth about life and death, could deceive herself about this son who so disappointed her.

The King was in agreement with her and while Caroline set off for Ansbach, Frederick William started his Grand Tour.

Without the two young people Sophia Charlotte found the palace unbearably lonely. Secretly she did not believe that the culture of other courts would change her son; and she was afraid of the decision Caroline might come to. If Caroline married her nephew George Augustus, their separation need not be of long duration; she could make many reasons for visiting her mother, and the Electress and Caroline could be constantly at Lutzenburg.