“To love her.”


Hobie looked as though she’d been slapped, then she looked as though she was going to cry. She sat heavily in the swing next to Juliana. “If you think for one moment that I’m in love with Baylor Warren...she’s nuts, do you know that?”

Juliana smiled. “She’s eccentric.”


“That’s just a rich person’s way of saying nuts,” Hobie countered. “The scary thing is that she thinks the rest of the world is crazy. She’s… oh, God, I don’t even know where to start.”

“Let’s see if I can help. She’s smart, but she knows it. She’s talented, which she doesn’t know, not how much, at least. Children and animals adore her, and although she has the patience of a saint with them, she won’t give most adults the time of day. Plus, she has an ego the size of a small third-world country and she never sees her own faults.”

“But she’s so...so...well, so the opposite of all that some days. When she’s not trying—”

“She’s sullen and brooding,” Juliana said. “Beautiful. Compassionate,” Hobie added softly. “Sarcastic. Caustic.”

“Tender. Gentle.”


“And finally, she’s the biggest pain in the ass in the whole world,” Juliana said.

Hobie looked over at Juliana. With a stricken expression, she covered her face with her hands. “Oh, God, Jules. I’m in love with the biggest pain in the ass in the world! How did this happen?”

She looked about ready to cry. Juliana wrapped an arm around her and held her for a few moments.

That’s when Baylor returned.


Baylor had suffered what she would remember as a harrowing, traumatic experience. The most embarrassing point had been regaining consciousness surrounded by a group of eight-year-old Junior Scouts. Too embarrassed to explain what happened, Baylor had made up an extraordinary story about how she suffered from seizures, and the girls were thrilled to get credit for finding her and saving her life. The older woman with them looked skeptical, but the lie served its purpose. Baylor tossed the girls enough money for ice cream and gingerly made her way back to her car.

She cleaned herself up as best she could with a travel package of Kleenex and a bottle of water. She wondered if she had a concussion; the plastic bird had hit her hard enough to draw blood. She was dirty, sweaty, and bloody, but there was only one thing to do at that point. She decided to go back to Hobie’s house and wait for her two-timing friends.

She parked the Jaguar, hoping fervently that the other women hadn’t noticed its absence. The guesthouse was not visible from the street. It was set behind the main house and surrounded by a privet and bougainvilleas. That’s where Baylor decided to set up watch.

She could hear the sound of voices, but not what they were saying. She angled over to better see the front of the guesthouse. What she saw was her best friend with her arms around Hobie, who didn’t look like she was doing much to change that situation.

“Son of a bi—ouch! Goddamn it!” Baylor had no idea that the beautiful red bougainvillea flowers, whose petals looked like rice paper, had thorns the size of small railroad spikes. She had leaned too close and the shoulder of her jacket snagged on the spiny thorns. Unfortunately, the more she struggled, the more entangled she became.

“Did you hear something?” Hobie lifted her head from Juliana’s shoulder.

“No. Did you want me to take a look?” “No, it’s probably just an alligator.”

Juliana’s eyes opened wide and she nervously looked around the dark area surrounding the porch.

“Just kidding. I haven’t seen one since I was a kid.” Hobie’s smile returned. “It’s probably just a raccoon or something equally as harmless.”

“Oh, love, you’ve got a well-evil sense of humor.”


“Sorry. Jules, I don’t want you to think I’m using you, but could I ask you one thing about Baylor?”

“I am the world’s foremost authority on Baylor Warren, my dear. Ask away.”


“What’s wrong with her? Was she dropped on her head as a baby or what?”

The question was such a serious one and Hobie’s expression so earnest that Juliana hated to laugh, but she couldn’t help it. She tilted her head back and roared with laughter.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I can’t stop myself. You’re the first person who’s ever had the guts to ask a question like that about Baylor.”

“I’m serious,” Hobie countered with a smile and a chuckle. “My God, it wasn’t bad enough that she had Noah fighting on the playground and calling other six-year-olds rat bastards. Last week, she taught him how to spit because she said that every big-leaguer should know how.”

Juliana’s laughter increased.


“I was over at Evelyn’s house for lunch once. An alarm went off and she rushed out to the greenhouse with Arturo right behind her. I swear she’s trained that dog to do the oddest things. She grabbed a clipboard, rushed out of the kitchen, and fifteen minutes later came back as if nothing ever happened. I told you about Katherine and Helen, right?”

Juliana stopped laughing long enough to mutter, “Yeah, the gals with the big rat.”

“It’s a hamster, but that’s not the point. When Baylor first got here, I had to beg her not to offend those women.”

“What’s she doing—being mean to them? That doesn’t sound like Baylor,” Jules asked, wiping tears from her eyes.

“Mean? She goes around acting as if Albert is real. Not just to be polite to Katherine, either. She talks about that goddamn rat to everyone who’ll listen!”

“I thought you said it was a hamster.”


“Whatever! You know what I mean! The coach is another example,” Hobie added. “She only sees the coach when she goes to the Cove. He hangs around the restaurant.”

“Yeah, she told me about him. The football geezer.”


“Right. I found her one afternoon on a park bench with the man. She was drawing up plays for the team.”

“Maybe she was just trying to help the bloke out.”


“He hasn’t coached football in twenty years! There is no team!”

“Oh.”


“I don’t know what to do about her anymore,” Hobie said as she slumped into the porch swing once again. “I’m afraid I’m in love with a crazy woman, Jules.”

Juliana made a sound that was half coughing and half laughter. “Funny, she says the same about you.”

“Baylor’s in love with me?” Hobie asked.


Juliana looked up, a fearful expression on her face. “No, no, I didn’t say that.”

“Yes, you did! I knew it. I just knew it! That’s what she wanted to tell me yesterday.”

“No, it didn’t come from me. Don’t you dare repeat it. Something bad will happen, I know it.”

“Oh, please.”


“It will. Evelyn said—”


“Evelyn? What’s she got to do with it?”


“Oh, my God! I didn’t say that. Shut up...don’t talk to me any more about it.”

“Will you stop?”


“No,” Juliana covered her ears with her hands. “No, no, no, no, no—”

“Will you stop!” Hobie slapped Juliana’s arm sharply. “My God, you and Baylor are exactly alike. What am I getting myself into?”

Juliana looked over at Hobie with a contrite expression. “Sorry. Just…just pretend like you don’t know. I promised Evelyn—”

“What in the hell does Evelyn have to do with all of this?” “Nothing, nothing at all.”

“God, maybe it’s not Baylor who’s crazy. Maybe it’s me. I feel like I’m losing it.”

“Look, Hobie,” Juliana began calmly, “Baylor’s always been a bit different. The interesting thing is that she doesn’t see it that way. She sees herself as perfectly normal and everyone else as slightly bonkers. Maybe she’s just found a place in Ana Lia where it’s okay to be different. Maybe you and Evelyn are responsible for taking our eccentric, slightly lovable, forty-two-year-old kid and making her see that different is acceptable.”

“So you mean I’m to blame?”


Juliana chuckled. “In a way, I guess. I’m just trying to get you to look at the other side of that coin.”

Hobie smiled back, a look that was part exasperation and part resignation. “I don’t think I could pry her out of my heart now with a crowbar. Trust me, I’ve tried. God Almighty, Jules, do you want to know the absolute craziest part?”

“And that is?”


“I’m in love with the woman who, at this very moment, is spying on us from the bushes.”

“You’re kidding.”


“I’d know the sound of her cursing anywhere,” Hobie said dryly. “Listen.”

Juliana paused to listen to the night sounds around them. Faintly, from the ocean side of the house, she heard Baylor’s mutterings.

“Goddamn son of a—” Then there was a ripping sound, followed by more muttered curses.

“I don’t believe it,” Juliana said.


“I do. Just what in the hell did she expect to catch us doing is what I wonder.”

“With Baylor, there’s no telling.” Juliana was trying hard not to laugh, which made her look as though she was struggling to hold her breath. “What do you think she’s doing back there to be cursing so much?” She gave up and allowed her laughter to escape.

“I don’t know, but I know what she’s going to see up here.” “What’s that mean?”

“Just follow my lead. Okay?”


“This sounds like trouble. Careful, Hobie.”


“I’m just going to give her what she came here for.” “All right, boss.”

“So want to come inside for a nightcap?” Hobie asked loudly. She rose from the swing and held out a hand. “We can get much more comfortable inside.”


“Uh, what about Noah?” Juliana asked, playing along. “Don’t worry, he’s staying the night with my mother.”

By this time, Baylor had thoroughly entangled herself amongst the spiny thorns of the bougainvilleas. She heard what was transpiring on the porch, which made her fight all the harder to get out of her current predicament. Of course, the harder she struggled, the tighter the long, vine-like branches held her in their grasp.

Juliana rose and took Hobie’s hand. When they reached the door of the guesthouse, Hobie turned around. Her next action took Juliana by surprise. She reached up and kissed her. It was no quick peck on the cheek, and Juliana’s whole body melted into the kiss. In a matter of seconds, the kiss was over and Hobie pulled Juliana through the open door.

That was about the time that Baylor went ballistic. She abandoned her jacket to the bloodthirsty branches and launched herself with amazing speed toward the guesthouse.

Juliana was still trying to catch her breath when Hobie closed the door. She leaned against a chair. “You know when I said that going out with you was like dating my sister?”

“Yeah.”


“I changed my mind. I don’t think my sister would snog anything like that.”

“You’re gonna have to explain that one.” “What, snog? Oh, kiss.”

Hobie slapped Juliana’s arm, which brought about a smile. “How long do you think it will take her?”

“Twenty, thirty more seconds,” Juliana said.


“And you say you know the woman. Five more seconds, tops. Five...four...three...two...”

Baylor pounded on the door. “Hobie Lynn, open this door right now!”

Juliana turned to Hobie. “You’re bloody good.”


“I am, aren’t I?” Hobie tossed her hair to one side as she slowly walked to the door. She laughed at her own behaviorbefore opening the door to face down her wounded would-be paramour.

“Baylor, my God, what happened to you?” Hobie asked.


Dirt and bits of leaves clung to Baylor’s clothes, and her hands were covered with bruises and scratches. The worst of it looked to be a streak of dried blood running from her hair and down one side of her face.

“You owe me three hundred dollars!” Baylor sneered. “What in the world are you talking about?” Hobie asked. “Your shrubbery ate my linen Armani jacket.”

Hobie crossed her arms. “And what, may I ask, were you doing in my shrubbery?”

Baylor opened her mouth for an angry reply. She watched as one of Hobie’s eyebrows arched and disappeared under auburn bangs. “I…she…” She couldn’t decide who to blame first. In her mind, she wasn’t to blame for any of the evening’s events. She was an innocent bystander. “You’re confusing me!” She pointed an accusing finger at Hobie.

“Good Lord. Sit down before you fall down.” Hobie shook her head. “Let me get the first-aid kit.” She walked out of the room.

Baylor sat heavily in the wooden chair. “Come here,” she all but whispered.