LJ Maas - Rebecca’s Cove

Rebecca’s

Cove

“I never blamed—”

“I know that, but that’s not why I bring this up now. I’m telling you these things to make you see that you may have been one way for a very long time, but people can change. You’ve changed, Baylor. You’ve changed for the better, and I’ve never been more proud of you.”

“Are you forgetting how I just acted?”

“We all have our weak moments,” Evelyn deadpanned. Baylor finally smiled as she sat down.

“Are you happy, Baylor?” “Not as this moment I’m not.”

“You need to work at finding the key then. The key to your happiness.”

“That’s funny. Rebecca Ashby was the last person to say that to me. Seems like I hear a lot about the key to happiness around here.”

“You’ll find that the people who are the most comfortable with themselves have discovered what it is. Maybe that’s why we have so many content people on Ana Lia.”

“So what is it, the key to happiness?”

“First of all, it’s up to you to discover that. Second, it’s different for everyone. What makes you happy?”

“Hobie. Hey, maybe she’s the key to my happiness, huh?” “As lovely as that sounds, let me give you one bit of advice

about your happiness. Don’t take this from your grandmother, take it from an old woman who has lived an awful lot of life. Don’t ever let your happiness depend upon another person, even one as lovely as Hobie Lynn.”

“I guess that makes sense.”

“What makes you happy, my dear?” Evelyn repeated gently. “I was just trying to think of that. I have to say that looking at

my life, I don’t recall too many times when I was actually happy. I wouldn’t say that writing does it for me. I mean, I love it, but it can become work, ya know? There’s Hobie. Noah,” Baylor added with a smile. “But if I couldn’t say people, I don’t know. I feel like it’s right here, ya know?” She grasped at the air. “I just can’t verbalize it. Like it’s a feeling of things. Damn, that makes no

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sense at all, does it?”

“It will come. Usually when you’re doing something mundane or something you’ve done a thousand times before, suddenly, you’ll realize that this is the thing that truly brings you happiness.”

“Do you know yours? Did you figure it out?” Baylor asked. Evelyn nodded, that same Mona Lisa smile on her face.

“Is it a secret? Can you tell me or is it a witch thing?” “You are a little stuck on that, aren’t you?”

“Oh, no, not at all. You know me, open mouth, insert foot. Sorry. Come on, tell me.”

“I’m surprised you don’t know what brings me the greatest joy in my life, aside from my headstrong granddaughter, that is.”

“Aimee? No, you said not to depend on other people for your happiness. Um, Arturo? No, you just got him.” Baylor’s brow furrowed in concentration.

“You’ve been taking care of them for me since the first day you arrived,” Evelyn hinted.

Baylor’s eyes lit up as the pieces fell into place. Framed Life covers and photos of her grandmother’s adventures filled her house. Cambodia, Thailand, Peru, Colombia, Brazil, Guatemala, Mexico.

“You’ve been in every jungle from—” Baylor looked into her grandmother’s eyes. “Your greenhouses.”

Evelyn smiled and leaned back on her pillows. “I finally realized it when I couldn’t go on assignment anymore. The jungles and rainforests were what I missed most of all. Unless you’ve been there, you don’t know what the early morning dew sounds like as it drips from leaf to leaf. There’s a smell...wet, loamy earth that’s all humid and still.” Her eyes took on a faraway expression. “Aimee and I worked to bring the rainforest to Ana Lia.”

The argument with Hobie came rushing back at Baylor. “I won’t ever be that happy, not without Hobie.”

Evelyn shook off her dreamy thoughts. “You won’t unless you find that girl and at least try to apologize.”

“Me? Shouldn’t she apologize to me?”

Evelyn raised an eyebrow, looking remarkably like her

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granddaughter.

“Okay, that was a stupid thing to say, wasn’t it?”

“See, you are learning to change. In the beginning of a relationship, you’ll find that one person may have to initiate apologies. It’s not always like that, but there are some people who...well, they’re too afraid of appearing vulnerable. Given enough time and love, they’ll overcome that. In the meantime, you may need to be the first to extend the olive branch, even when you know you’re right. After all, does it really matter who did what to whom first? Isn’t it more important to have Hobie Lynn back in your life?”

Baylor realized the truth of it. Getting Hobie back was the most important thing.

“Is Hobie one of those people you just talked about, Tanti? Is she afraid?”

“Hobie Lynn is very afraid. Remember when I told you that our past experiences shape who we are?”

Baylor nodded.

“Hobie’s life was shaped by her father, too. When he died, he left her with the feeling that people aren’t permanent. She fears living without love, but just as strong is her fear of loving someone who will leave her.”

“I have to find her.” Baylor jumped from her seat and crossed the room to the window. “The car’s still here. Maybe she walked.”

“What would you do if I said I knew where to find her?” “Kiss you.” Baylor grinned before growing serious. “Then

grovel, I guess.”

“Help her confront her fears. She is a master at sweeping her emotions into a corner. If you’re serious about this girl, you have to make her admit to it. In the end, it will be worth it. One more thing.”

Baylor turned.

“Don’t do this unless you really are serious about committing to one woman and helping to raise a son. You’ll do harm to everyone, yourself included, if you don’t know yet whether this is what you want.”

Baylor nodded slowly, her brain working overtime. “Hobie is what I want, her and everything about her. Noah, this island, these crazy people—all of it, and I’ll do whatever it takes to get her.”

Evelyn’s smile fairly lit up the room. Her happiness at that moment had nothing to do with her hopes for Baylor’s future on Ana Lia. Rather, it came from seeing her only grandchild finally become the woman she had always hoped she would one day be.

“Very well then. I think you’ll find Hobie Lynn at the west end of the building. There’s a small atrium across from physical therapy. She loves flowers. You’ll also discover that she is as miserable over her actions as you were.”

Baylor smiled from ear to ear. “Thanks, Tanti!” She was almost out of the door before Evelyn’s voice stopped her.

“Wait a minute!” Evelyn pointed to her own cheek. “Aren’t you forgetting what you just promised?”

“Oh, yeah.” Baylor blushed and came back to her grandmother’s bedside. She leaned down and planted a gentle kiss on the old woman’s cheek. “Thanks, Tanti. I’ll be back. You’re the best.”

“Yes, that goes without saying,” Evelyn said as Baylor rushed out the door.

The entrance to the atrium was through stained-glass doors, making it look more like a chapel. As Baylor approached, she saw a small plaque bolted to the wall. It read, “Many thanks to Evelyn Warren for the design and funding of this special part of our hospital.”

Baylor smiled to herself. It figured that Evelyn was responsible. How she knew Hobie would be there, Baylor couldn’t guess. She silently pushed open the door. Sure enough, Hobie sat alone on a stone bench near a bubbling water fountain. Baylor stared open-mouthed at the beautiful surroundings. It was a miniature version of the greenhouses Evelyn had at home. There were even some small birds flitting among the branches.

Baylor’s plan was to quietly walk up to Hobie, who appeared lost in her own thoughts. She stepped into the room and was startled by a loud squawk. “Jesus Christ!” she cried out, swatting at a brightly colored macaw on its perch. The bird raised its wings and squawked again.

Hobie quickly turned to see the exchange. “That figures,” she muttered. She turned away. “What do you want?”

“I, um, I guess I came to find you...to apologize.” “Apologize?”

“Well, yeah.”

“Why on earth would you want to apologize to me?”

Baylor looked surprised. She had expected Hobie to be mad, but this seemed like something else. “Um...because I like you. I care about you,” she said uncertainly.

“You shouldn’t.” “Huh?”

“Care. I’m not worth it.”

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“I disagree. Look, Hob, I’m confused. Why do you sound so weird?”

“If you’d known me long enough, it wouldn’t sound weird at all.” Hobie wore a bittersweet smile.

“I don’t get it.”

“I’m mad! All right?” Hobie stood and crossed to where Baylor stood. “I’m just mad!”

“At me?”

“No, at me,” Hobie said. “You’re just...in the way.”

Baylor concentrated on not smiling. She had a feeling that it would only make Hobie angrier, but it was so hard to keep a straight face. Hobie looked too damn cute. Even if Baylor had wanted to remain angry, she couldn’t resist that face. “Can I do anything to help in this war you seem to have going on between you and you?” Baylor couldn’t help it. She smiled the tiniest bit.

That action brought about a much-needed change in Hobie, whose features relaxed for a moment until her brow furrowed. Suddenly, she covered her face with both hands.

“I’m so sorry, Baylor. I didn’t mean those things. I didn’t mean any of it. I didn’t mean it when I said I didn’t want to see you again, I can be such a bitch. I—”

“Honey, honey.” Baylor moved to envelop Hobie in her arms. “It’s okay. You know, I did have a small part in all of that nonsense.”

“No, no.” Hobie shook her head as she buried her face against Baylor’s chest. “I’m just that way. I can be such a failure.”

“A failure at what?”

“I don’t know. Life. Everything.”

Baylor pulled away slightly to look at Hobie. She lifted Hobie’s face and wiped the tears from her cheeks. “Okay, calm down. All right? I don’t understand. You’re probably the most successful woman I’ve ever met. You’re an MD and a DVM, for God’s sake. What do you mean you’re a failure?”

Hobie took a deep breath. “Can we sit?” “Absolutely.”

Once seated, Hobie didn’t look up at Baylor. She didn’t feel as though she could admit to that part of her past with those soft

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gray eyes looking at her. It touched her heart when Baylor gently grasped her hands and silently waited for her to begin.

“I was pretty idealistic as a kid. I guess it really intensified after Dad died. I had a rough time with it, but I hid that from everyone. Inside, though, I promised myself that I would never let some other kid go through what I had to go through. Like I said, pretty idealistic.”

“I don’t have a hard time picturing that,” Baylor said.

Hobie smiled. “I guess I’m not too terribly different than that little kid that everything came so easily for. Maybe I was too smart for my own good. I suppose I thought I could do anything I put my mind to. Maybe it didn’t help that I graduated from high school at sixteen and a half.”

“You really were a whiz kid, huh?”

Hobie smiled. “Yeah, I was one of those pain-in-the-ass kids you read about. Studies came too easy to me. I sped through my education, and when it came time to choose my career path, I went with a branch of medicine that suited my character. I wanted to become a surgeon. I had no idea I would turn into such a failure.”

Baylor could only stare at the woman seated next to her. “How did you do it? How were you able to change so much? You seem so happy and self-confident. You say you failed. Do you mean at medicine?”

Those questions made Hobie feel better. Baylor hadn’t judged her or dismissed her, but simply accepted what Hobie had told her as the truth. Accepted and desired the same sort of change in her own life. To Hobie, that was the most beautiful part.