I stood my ground firmly.

‘What did it mean? You are surely not going to fight!’

‘He left me no alternative.’

‘But he merely expressed a point of view.’

‘Which was an insult to the Crown.’

‘But not a personal one.’

‘My dear Mistress Landor, I am one of the King’s generals. Any insult to His Majesty is indeed my affair.’

‘Does this mean there is to be a duel?’

‘Pray do not concern yourself. It is a fairly commonplace affair.’

‘Which could end in death for one of you!’

‘It may be, but perhaps not.’

‘But …’

‘Come, it grows chill.’

He would say no more and I could do nothing but allow him to lead me in.

He took me to Senara, who was in conversation with a group of people, then he bowed and departed.

I was glad when the evening was over and we were going home in the coach, and so relieved that no one was inclined for talk. I could not stop thinking of what seemed to me that most stupid quarrel which could well end in the death of one of those men.

I knew that if Richard Tolworthy were killed I should remember him for the rest of my life.

I passed a miserable two days. Richard Tolworthy would either be killed himself or kill the other man and I could see no satisfaction in that. How could he have challenged the other in such a senseless manner? Luke Longridge had insulted the King. Well, I thought angrily, let the King fight his own battles. But Richard was a soldier … a man of ideals. Of course he was right, I assured myself. I thought of Luke Longridge, whom I was beginning to hate because he had provoked this duel.

I asked Carlotta what happened if a man was injured in a duel.

‘Sometimes he dies. It depends how deeply he is wounded.’

‘And the other?’

‘He would probably flee the country. After all, it is murder.’

‘I see.’

‘Why do you ask?’

‘I just wanted to know. I am supposed to learn the manners and customs of the nobility, am I not?’

‘That’s a morbid one.’

‘I have noticed that many customs end in morbidity.’

‘Ah,’ she mocked, ‘you are becoming quite observant.’

I tried to put the matter from my mind and to tell myself how foolish I was to be involved with a man whom I had met only twice, though they had been two unusual occasions—one when he had saved me from a horrible fate and the other when he had challenged a man to a duel.

How I wished that Bersaba was with me so that I could tell her of my feelings. I wondered when my mother would suggest that I returned. She would need me to nurse Bersaba, to be with her perhaps. She had said in her letter that it would be a long time before she was herself again and had hinted that the disease was still in the village and that she did not want me to return until the neighbourhood was, as she called it, clean again.

I thought that if General Richard Tolworthy were killed or fled abroad I would like to go home without delay. Then I could put the whole London adventure behind me and look back on it as something rather unreal.

However, a week after the ball Richard Tolworthy called at the house.

By great good fortune Senara had gone to say goodbye to neighbours, for she was leaving the following week. Carlotta had accompanied her and Sir Gervaise was at Whitehall. The General was apparently making a conventional call on Sir Gervaise and when he was told that he was not at home he asked if I were.

As a result I was receiving him in the parlour which led from the hall, and floods of joy swept over me when I saw that he was neither maimed nor had the look of a fugitive.

‘I was hoping that I might have a word with you,’ he said, ‘because you were so concerned on the night of the ball.’

‘Indeed I was. I could not understand what had happened so suddenly and why it should be a matter of life and death.’

‘I had no alternative in the circumstances but to deliver the challenge. However, it was not taken up. I received an apology. The offending words were retracted and so we did not meet.’

‘I am so pleased. It was wise of him.’

‘He is a Puritan at heart and doesn’t believe in shedding blood.’

‘Then I think there is a great deal to be said for Puritanism.’

He smiled at me. ‘You were really anxious, I know.’

‘Oh, I was. I thought you would be killed or perhaps kill him and have to go into exile.’

‘I am grateful for your concern.’

‘But of course I’m concerned. Didn’t you save me!’

‘That was nothing.’

I just could not help showing my relief and I think he was very pleased.

He talked for some time, asking me more questions about my home. He wanted to know how long I was staying in London and when I told him that I might be leaving at any time and that it would depend on my sister’s health and when the plague vanished from the neighbourhood, he listened very intently.

Then he said: ‘I hope you will stay a long while. Or do you get a little homesick?’

‘I was at first. Now … I am not sure. There is so much of interest here.’

‘Encounters with beggars, duels?’ he suggested.

‘And meeting interesting people,’ I told him.

‘There must be interesting people whom you meet in your home.’

‘Yes,’ I admitted, ‘but … different.’

And I thought then: I have never met anyone like you. I knew then that as long as I lived I never would.

When he left he took my hand in his and kissed it.

He said: ‘I shall call again.’

I watched him ride away, and then I went up to my room because I wanted to be alone to think about him. If I had to return to Cornwall now, how should I feel? I should be wretched. Wretched to go to my beloved home, to see my dearest mother and the sister who was part of myself! What had happened to me?

I half suspected that, in my impulsive thoughtless way, I was in love with Richard Tolworthy.

The weeks slipped quickly by. Senara left and I was sad to say goodbye to her, for I felt I had lost a friend. True to his promise, General Tolworthy called on us. Sir Gervaise could not understand at first. ‘General Tolworthy seems to have become very friendly towards me suddenly,’ was his comment. We were invited to functions where we met him and we had many conversations together.

Carlotta thought he had conceived a passion for her which, being the man he was, he would keep secret. She made much of him and consequently she frequently invited him to the house. I was rather amused because deep in my heart I knew that it was not Carlotta who interested him. There was something inherently serious about him—almost secretive; but there was a rapport between us; we did not have to speak much; he did not even have to single me out particularly, but I knew in my heart that I was the one he came to see.

Now I was afraid that my mother would say I must return, and I had visions of slipping out of his life and I wondered whether he would let me go. Much as I longed to see my family, I could not endure the thought of leaving him.

‘My dearest Angelet,’ she wrote.

‘First let me tell you that your sister is improving, though she has a long way to go. I can tell you now that she has come very near to death. She is so weak still that she must keep to her bed. She sends her dearest love to you, my darling, but is too weak to take up her pen to write to you herself. You may be sure that when she is strong enough she will do so.

My aim is to nurse her back to her former strength. The physicians tell me that will take months and that it is little short of a miracle that we have her with us. I want you, my daughter, to endure this long separation as best you can. I would not have you here just yet and if you can assure me that you are well and happy I will content myself and look forward to your return as we all do …’

I read that letter over and over again. It filled me with joy. I was pleasing my mother by staying and I knew now that more than seeing my sister, more than being with my mother, I wanted to be here, where each day I awoke with the thought: It could happen today.

I meant that General Tolworthy might that day ask me to be his wife.

Winter had come. I had never before spent a Christmas away from home. My mother had written to me sending me silk to make a gown and telling me not to be too unhappy because I should not be with them this year. The festivities at Trystan would be less merry than usual, for Bersaba was so easily tired and must spend several hours each day on her bed.

The mummers would come, she doubted not, and there would be the carol singers; Aunt Melanie and Uncle Connell had insisted on coming to be with them, but my father, Fennimore and Bastian would not be there, so a great deal of usual activities would not take place.

‘Next Christmas,’ wrote my mother, ‘I trust we shall all be together.’

So Christmas was celebrated at Pondersby Hall, and although we did have a lord of misrule, it was far less simple than our Christmases at home. For instance, there was a masque where we did a Spanish play which Carlotta managed for us and in which we all had to play a part. We rehearsed for two weeks before Christmas and we performed it both on Christmas Day and Twelfth Night. Carlotta, of course, was the central character and she acted with great skill and charm, and it was true that numbers of the young men regarded Sir Gervaise enviously and gazed at Carlotta with longing eyes. So it was not surprising that she counted Richard Tolworthy among her admirers.

He went away immediately after Christmas and weeks elapsed before I saw him again. I began to fret thinking that he had forgotten all about me.

January came and with it the snow. We had it so rarely in Cornwall that I could only remember seeing it three times. Then how excited we had been. We had pelted each other with snowballs and I remember that Bastian was there and had made Bersaba his special target.

Now it was different. We did not play at snowballs but we skated on the ponds and that was good fun, but all the time I was thinking of Richard and wondering if I should ever see him again.

It was a dark early February day when he rode over. The roads which had been impassable were clear again, and all that was left of the recent snow was mounds of it in the fields and against the hedgerows.

There was a great fire in the hall when he came in. I heard him asking the footman if Sir Gervaise was at home, and I went into the hall trying to look as though I had come down by chance.

I held out my hand to him and said as calmly as I could; ‘It is a long time since we have seen you, General.’

He replied that he had been in the north on business. Then Sir Gervaise appeared and I hung back while he was conducted to the parlour. Sir Gervaise ordered that Carlotta be told that we had a visitor.

I went to my room. I did not want to see Carlotta paying him that very special attention she reserved for men, and I had come to the conclusion that I had allowed myself to imagine what I wanted to believe and that Richard Tolworthy had no more interest in me than he would in any young girl whom he had rescued from a pair of ruffians, and who had shown some concern because she had heard him challenge someone to a duel.

I combed my hair, patting it into shape, hoping that he would ask to see me, but he didn’t.

A few days later he called again. This time I was alone and he asked if I would see him and I received him in the parlour.

‘I have to confess a little duplicity,’ he told me. ‘I learned that Sir Gervaise and his lady would not be at home today. So I called in the hope that you would be.’

‘You … wanted to see me then?’

I felt as though the sun had suddenly burst forth and was shining more brilliantly than it did in the summer and that the entire universe was singing with joy.

‘I wanted to talk to you rather specially.’

‘Yes?’ I asked breathlessly.

‘Pray sit down,’ he said. I sat on the window-seat and folded my hands in my lap. I dared not look at him in case I should betray my feelings.

‘I think,’ he said, ‘that we have become good friends. Do you agree?’

‘Oh, I do. Indeed I do.’

‘You exaggerated what I did on my first meeting. It was no more than any man would have done.’

‘I shall never forget that you risked your life for me.’