Beth Michele - Scarred Beautiful

Caleb and Peyton are whispering to one another, her fingers toying with the dark hair around his ear, and I already know where that’s leading so I decide I’m going to call it a night.

“All right lovebirds,” I slur, and notice Peyton giving me the death glare, “I’m heading up to bed.”

Matt stands up and kicks his chair back, the scraping noise jarring my drunken state. “I’ll walk you.”

Shit.

I say goodbye to Caleb and give Peyton a quick kiss on the cheek. “I’ll talk to you in the morning…after you’ve slept in,” I whisper, and feel a pang of jealousy hit my alcohol-ridden gut, wishing that I didn’t have so much baggage dragging me down, pulling me under and making it impossible for me to breathe.

Matt places his hand on my lower back and ushers me through the bar and out to the bank of elevators. If I was the old Fran, I’d have jumped Matt’s bones the minute I saw him…not that I’m not still thinking about it. He just can’t know that I’m thinking about it.

We step into the elevator, neither of us saying anything, but as the car ascends I can feel Matt’s stare boring a hole through my dress. I look up to meet his eyes. “What?”

“Nothing,” he says with a smirk and a shrug of his shoulders, “it’s just that you’re freaking cute…that’s all.”

I put my hands on my hips, my eyebrows crinkling, attempting to appear offended and not tip over at the same time. “I’m not having sex with you, Matt, so just forget it.” Even though I really want to.

Before I can even blink, Matt is standing in front of me. He places his hands on either side of my head and leans in, his scent filling the space around me, masculine yet sweet, intoxicating. His soft lips brush the shell of my ear, his breath a warm dusting across my cheek. “Did I say anything about wanting to have sex with you, Fran? Because if I wanted to be inside that hot little body of yours, you’d know it.”

My throat goes dry, his words turning me on. I drop my gaze to his mouth, close my eyes and inhale a deep breath through my nose, attempting to control my raging hormones. When I open them, he’s smiling down at me.

“Well, I’m glad we got that straightened out,” I croak, just in time for the elevator doors to open.

Fuck she’s hot. I can feel her uneven breaths against my lips as her chest rises and falls after hearing my words. Those eyes, like green panes of stained glass. That plump bottom lip, I’d love to take between my teeth. And she smells good, like jasmine and lavender.

I’m not sure what possessed me to say that to her. I know nothing about her. She’s like a little spark though. She lit me up tonight with her smart, sexy mouth, and now she’s got me thinking thoughts I haven’t in a long time, stirring something deep inside of me that’s been asleep. Like how I want to take her right here, make her scream my name while she comes apart beneath me.

The elevator doors open and she ducks down and sneaks underneath my arm to make her way out.

“Goodnight, Matt.”

I hold the doors open and watch her walk down the hall, taking one last look over her shoulder before she turns the corner to her room, leaving me with only one thought.

When do I get to see her again?

Shit. I’m fucked.

I slip the keycard into the door as quickly as I can, my hands somewhat shaky, my feet aching from the high heels I desperately need to remove. The moment I’m inside, I sag back against the door and slide down to the carpet, immediately taking off my shoes and tossing them aside. The guy went from tight-ass to hot-as-hell quicker than it takes a Ferrari to pick up speed. Maybe he’s bipolar.

I’m breathing heavy and I know it’s not from the alcohol or from any form of physical exertion, although I wish it was—shit. What possessed me to say that to Matt in the elevator? Gee, Fran, I don’t know, maybe the fact that all you could think about as he was sitting across the table from you was having sex with him.

With a frustrated sigh, I push myself up off the floor and strip down to my bra and panties. I pad to the bathroom to splash some cold water on my face, trying to put out the flame that’s been ignited deep in my belly. There’s a part of me that wishes I could knock on the door to Matt’s room and just tell him what I want, but I know I’ll only regret it in the morning. It’s a temporary fix. It won’t fill the void in my heart, the crack that’s irreparable.

As I’m lying in bed, my hand lowers to my belly, touching the scars inked on my skin like a tattoo, the permanent reminder of the past that I’ll never escape. I remember sitting in school wishing I could just erase my father, take one of those No. 2 pencils and make him disappear, drawing a new dad in his place. The kind of dad who sits and reads you bedtime stories and seeks you out for a tackle hug when he comes home from work…a dad who doesn’t have a twisted fondness for a paring knife.

A knock on the door yanks me from that horrible place and when I glance at the clock on the side table, it reads 1:00 a.m. I can’t imagine who that could be at this hour. Even though I wasn’t sleeping, I let out an annoyed breath then look around for something to cover my skimpy tank and panties, when I spy one of those fluffy hotel robes hanging on the bathroom door. It might just end up in my suitcase. I wrap it around me and belt it, taking a second to revel in its softness before tiptoeing over to the door as if someone can actually hear me from behind it.

Peyton’s eyes are staring back at me through the peephole and I wonder what the heck she’s doing here. I thought for sure she’d be in the throes of passion right about now.

I pull the handle for the door and it clicks open to reveal Peyton, grinning like the Cheshire cat.

“Ahhhhh!” she screams with excitement, before running in and jumping on the luxurious king-sized bed that just moments ago was going to lull me into a not so peaceful sleep.

“What are you doing here? I thought for sure you’d be with Caleb,” I say, before sitting on the edge of the bed next to her.

“I was with Caleb, and if he isn’t the sweetest thing.” She pauses and exhales a breath. “And so sexy, too.” She touches her fingers to her lips. “Oh my God, Fran, the guy can kiss. I honestly could have kissed him all night.”

I can’t help but smile, she’s acting like a girl who just had her first date. “So, I ask again, what are you doing here? Why aren’t you off kissing Caleb?”

“I guess I wanted to play a little hard to get.” She lets out a huge groan. “But now, I’m kind of regretting my decision.” She puts both arms over her face, covering her eyes. “Now I’m all hot and bothered.”

I laugh, slapping her leg, and she flinches. “Well, can’t do much for you there, I’m not into girls.”

She lifts her arms away, revealing a smirk. “Ha ha. So what happened with you and Mr. Broody?”

“Mr. Broody,” I repeat, mulling the name over in my head. “Nothing. He just escorted me upstairs. That’s it.”

Peyton leans up on her elbows, glaring at me. “You didn’t even kiss the guy?”

“No. It’s not that I didn’t want to, though. He’s all kinds of hot with a dab of uptight. I like teasing him to see if I can get a rise out of him.”

She quirks a brow, her lips curving into a grin. “Oh, I’m sure you could get a rise out of him.”

Our laughter engulfs the room and I lie down on the bed next to her. My robe shifts, her fingers accidentally grazing the burn scars on my thigh, and she blanches, bolting upright, her eyes wide in shock. I hold my breath, wanting to avoid this, desperate to run.

“What happened, Fran?”

Peyton and I have only been roommates for a short time and I’m very careful that she doesn’t see my scars. I don’t know why, really. I guess it’s because I hate having to explain myself all over again and dredge up painful memories I’d rather leave behind. I’ll never leave them behind, though, because they’re always chasing me, threatening to expose my secrets at every turn.

I immediately slide off the bed, covering my legs with my robe, keeping my face hidden. “It’s nothing, really. I need to get to sleep, Peyton. You should probably go.”

She jumps from the bed and touches my elbow softly. “It doesn’t look like nothing, Fran. It looks like a whole lot of something. Who did that to you?”

I take a deep breath, attempting to calm the wave of tension rolling through my body at having this conversation with her. The idea that she means well is in the forefront of my mind, although it doesn’t squelch the bile churning my stomach, making it impossible for me to get the words out. But I’m suddenly struck with what Gabby said to me her last night in our apartment. “Take another chance, Fran. You have to let someone in. Let someone care for you.” I don’t think she was referring to Peyton, but if I ever want our friendship to move to the next level then I at least have to try.

Turning to face her, I gather some courage and say the two words that have always caused me nothing but pain and utter devastation, leaving my life in a state of ruin. “My dad.”

“Jesus, Fran,” is the only thing she says before pulling me into a hug, wrapping her arms around me, comforting me. A single droplet slides down my cheek, the cheek of a twenty-eight year old woman who has undergone years of therapy yet still can’t manage to say those two words without tears.

“I’m so, so sorry.” She squeezes me tighter before backing away to examine me. “Thank you for telling me,” she says, sincerity lacing the rich, brown depth of her eyes. “You know,” she starts, “when I was sixteen years old, my best friend Susie….” She hesitates as sadness spreads across her features. “She…she’d been physically abused by her uncle, and…she never got over it.” Her eyes pool with tears and then close briefly as if to blink away the pain. “She couldn’t handle it. She tried for so many years but it ate her up until she finally didn’t want to live anymore. I desperately wanted to save her but there was nothing I could do. She didn’t make it, Fran…but I’m so glad you did.” She smiles and clasps my hand, my heart expanding at her words, and I’m suddenly very grateful she’s here.

I draw her into a hug, wanting to comfort her as much as she’s now comforting me. “Thank you, Peyton, so much,” I tell her, and she’ll never know what her words mean to me. A few seconds go by and I finally release her and back away as a yawn escapes.

“Do you want me to stay with you tonight?” she asks, flicking a tear from the corner of her eye.

“I’m good, really. Thanks, though. I’m just gonna get a good night’s sleep.”

“If you’re sure,” she says, checking me over one more time before heading to the door.

“Positive.” I yawn again as I hold it open for her, exhaustion getting the better of me.

“Oh,” she says quickly as the door closes, “we have plans tomorrow morning, be ready by eleven.”

I yank the door open and poke my head out just in time to see her wink before disappearing down the hall.

Plans, what plans?

I step in the shower and turn the water to hot, letting the warmth cascade over my muscles, sore from an early morning workout. I’m more achy than usual, probably because I worked out harder than I normally do, visions of Fran’s flushed cheeks and hot little body pressed against the elevator wall spurring me on. Vivid images of those cherry red lips and what they might taste like, what they might feel like if they were sliding down my cock pushing me to exhaustion. I bet her skin is smooth and the thought of slipping my hand, or better yet, my tongue between her creamy thighs makes me so damn hard I can barely think straight.

There’s something about that feisty attitude of hers, too, coupled with the fact that she’s fucking gorgeous, that makes her irresistible. Work has consumed my life for so long and I’ll admit she sparks something in me. The flip side to that is I really don’t need the aggravation and Fran is very aggravating, exactly the reason why I’m seeing her today…so she can aggravate me a little more. I smile as I grab a towel and wrap it around my waist.

There’s a knock at the door and just by looking at the time I know it’s Caleb. When he says he’ll be here at 10:00 a.m., he’ll be here at 10:00 a.m. He’s got this thing about being prompt. With six kids, his mom had to keep everyone in line so she didn’t go insane.