In this mood I came to Kaiserwald.

We were greeted by the Head Deaconess. I could see she had some misgivings because of our night’s absence.

“We were so enthralled by Rosenwald,” Damien told her, ‘that we delayed leaving. After all, there was no point in our going if we were not going to see it all. However, we stayed the night at Graf von Spiegal’s hunting lodge. “

She looked relieved.

“And how is the Herr Graf?”

“Oh, very well.”

That satisfied her. He looked at me mischievously.

It was not so easy with Eliza. I could see she was shaken.

I thought it would be better to tell her immediately. I said:

“I am going to marry Dr. Adair.”

“Oh! That’s a sudden decision.”

I nodded.

“You look different,” she said.

“I feel different.”

That was all. She changed the subject and asked about Rosenwald, but I saw her lips pressed together in disapproval. I talked enthusiastically of the possibilities of the place.

“At the moment they have untrained nurses. It would be a great challenge to someone who wanted to make a Kaiserwald of it.”

“I thought you were going to do that.”

“I thought so at first. I thought he was showing me the place for that purpose.”

“But he had another purpose. You haven’t thought much about this, have you?”

“I … I didn’t have to think, Eliza. I knew. It is like that sometimes.”

“I reckon you’re making a mistake. If you marry him you’ll sup sorry with a long spoon, as they say.”

“I think I’ll sup a lot of joy with an even longer spoon,” I said.

“You’re pretty far gone, ain’t you?”

“Yes, Eliza. I am very far gone.”

“He’s that sort of man. He only has to lift his finger and beckon.

That’s enough. You follow. “

“My dear Eliza, there are many things we cannot know about each other.

This is right for me. This is what I want more than anything. I am happy as I never thought to be. I can put my sadness behind me. He makes me feel alive . “

“For how long?”

“For the rest of our lives, Eliza. I am going to see that that is so.”

She sighed.

“Tell me more about this Rosenwald,” she said.

I would not allow Eliza’s implications of doom to depress me. I gave myself up to happiness. He had told the Head Deaconess that we should be leaving within the next few days, and that we were going to be married.

Her first thoughts were for Rosenwald.

“I had thought that perhaps Miss Pleydell… It would have been a challenge for her.”

“Indeed yes,” he said with a smile, ‘but she is taking up an even greater challenge. “

Eliza came with me when I took the riding habit back to Fraulein Kleber. As soon as we approached the house we heard sounds of shooting. She was still practising. I went round to the back of the barn. Several people were there.

“Oh, here you are, Fraulein Pleydell,” she said.

“And you’ve brought the habit back. Was it comfortable?”

“It was excellent. How can I thank you for being so kind?”

“By wishing me luck in the Schutzenfest.”

“Oh, I do, most heartily.”

“These are people from the neighbourhood. They’ll all be there for the Fest. I am lending them guns.”

“You seem to be the benefactress round here, lending people your possessions.”

“It is foolish in the case of the guns because these people will be my rivals.”

“I am sure you will excel them all.”

“If I don’t it won’t be for want of practice. You’d be surprised at the number of them who come to me, to practise. Well, I have my father’s guns and they might as well be put to some use. Come into the house and have a glass of wine.”

I thanked her and said I would not interrupt the practice; and in any case we had to get back to Kaiserwald. We were leaving in two days’ time.

“Well, I’m glad to have been of use.”

“Thank you so much, and may you hit the target every time.”

“What a friendly woman,” I said as we left; and Eliza agreed.

In my thoughts I had called him Dr. Damien the Demon Doctor. I told him that and he said: “Now I shall be Damien, the perfect husband.”

“We have to wait and see whether you earn that title. Now I shall just call you Damien.”

“I like the way you say it. You make it sound godlike.”

He complained that we could not be alone in the hospital. There was always someone to interrupt.

“That friend of yours, Big Eliza, clings like a leech. She breathes fire on me every time she sees me.”

“You are mixing similes and metaphors. Dragons breathe fire, not leeches.”

“She’s a very capable woman. She can make the transition from leech to dragon at the batting of an eyelid. Let’s go for a walk in the forest.

There we can make plans. Do you realize there is a lot to be settled yet? “

“Yes, I do.”

“We’ll go separately, otherwise we shall have Eliza trailing us. I’ll meet you in the clearing … say ten minutes.”

I agreed.

I shall never forget that afternoon. I had known disaster before but never anything so sudden. I had never before been plunged from the heights of ecstasy to the depths of despair.

I left the hospital, light-hearted, engulfed in happiness. It had never occurred to me that anything could change so quickly.

I came to the clearing. He was already there. He saw me and as he started to hurry towards me, the shot rang out. I heard the loud report. I saw him, standing there for half a second, and then he slowly fell to the ground.

I dashed to him. There was blood everywhere. He was lying on the grass. I stared at him in horror. I heard myself murmur:

“Damien … dead.”

I knelt beside him.

“Damien,” I whispered. His eyes were closed and there was a terrible stillness about him.

I knew that I must take immediate action. I thought the bullet had entered his back. What we needed was a doctor . without delay.

I ran with all the speed I could muster, back to the hospital.

I was thankful for Dr. Kratz and Dr. Bruckner. They acted speedily and efficiently. A stretcher was brought out and Damien was carried to the hospital. It was a blessing that medical help was so near.

They were with him for a long time and I knew that he was seriously hurt.

I prayed; “Oh God, don’t let him die … not now … when we have just found each other. I could not bear that. I will do anything anything but don’t let him die.”

It was the incoherent prayer of a frightened woman flung from the pinnacle of happiness to the very nadir of despair.

I waited for the doctors to emerge. They had a certain respect for me and I knew they would tell me the truth.

“We have extracted the bullet,” they told me.

“He will recover?”

They were silent.

“Tell me. Tell me,” I cried.

“We do not know. It was his spine. It’s early days yet.”

“I shall nurse him,” I said.

“Yes … yes.”

“May I go to him?”

“He is not conscious.”

“Just to sit by him.”

They looked at each other and nodded.

So I went in and sat there. How different he looked! He was so pale; his deepset eyes were closed and his chiselled features looked more prominent. I had always seen him so vital. so much more alive than anyone I had known and now he looked . dead.

The Head Deaconess came in. She laid a hand on my shoulder. She said:

“It is better to leave him. He needs rest, and you need care, my child.” I turned to her with the misery in my eyes and she said: “We must pray that he will recover. He is a very strong man. He would always get his way and he very much wants to live now that you and he have made plans together.”

I let her lead me from the room. She took me to mine and made me lie on my bed.

Eliza came in.

She said to her: “Look after Miss Pleydell. She needs you.”

Eliza nodded.

How long the days seemed! How long the nights! I lay sleepless.

Eliza did not sleep either.

“Perhaps it was all for the best,” she said.

“Eliza,” I said, ‘if he dies I shall never be happy again. I have been so wretched, so immersed in my tragedy, I have brooded on the cruelty of life and I can now see that I magnified my troubles. I’ve grown away from that. He showed me how foolish I was. With him I could have become my true self again. If he does not recover, I have lost that chance. When he asked me to marry him I knew complete happiness. I want to be with him all the time. Do you understand that, Eliza? “

“I think I begin to.”

“He must get well. You and I will nurse him back to health. You will help me, Eliza?”

“Yes,” she said.

“I will help you.”

“Oh, thank you.”

“I thought you would have been happy in that house with Dr. Fenwick,” she said, ‘but I see now that this is the one you want. no matter what he is. “

“I’m glad you see that now, Eliza.”

In the morning I had an interview with the doctors. The news was heartening.

“We think there is a good chance of his recovery.”

I was overwhelmed with joy. Then I saw the glances pass between them.

“What is it?” I asked fearfully.

“We don’t know how it will be with him …if he recovers.”

“I see.”

“Yes, Miss Pleydell. There is only one thing we can do and that is wait and see.”

My concern for him had made me pay little attention to the mystery which occupied everyone’s mind.

Who had fired the shot which had obviously been intended to kill him?

He had been there in the clearing alone, exposed to view. Someone must have taken a shot at him from the shelter of the trees.

There had been a great deal of activity in the neighbourhood recently because of the Schutzenfest which was shortly to be held and the sound of shots could be continually heard. People were shooting everywhere.

Could it have been a stray bullet which had hit Dr. Adair, maybe from some young man or woman who was not accustomed to using a gun?

The bullet was examined. It was common enough and there was little to be learned from it. Who would have wanted to kill Dr. Adair? He was not an inhabitant of the place. He was not even a resident doctor only a visiting one.

Fraulein Kleber’s practice range had not been far off. Could it really have been that someone who had been trying to hit that had missed so widely?

It seemed the most likely explanation.

Enquiries continued but no one came forward with a solution to the mystery. Investigations found nothing suggesting that anyone had tried to murder Dr. Adair.

A week passed a week when my hopes had risen only to be dashed and to rise again. He was still alive. Dr. Kratz said he clung to life with a tenacity which was amazing. He was aware of me and I knew he drew great comfort from my presence. When I was not with him, Eliza took over. I was amazed at the care with which she did this. She was fiercely protective of him; she, who had hated him so intensely, was determined that he should recover.

At first we had feared that he would be paralysed. I tried to visualize what his life would be he, the most active of men, to be confined to his bed. I vowed that I would look after him and dedicate my whole life to him.

But his fierce determination had its effect. Within a week he could move his legs; and within three he was walking with the aid of a stick.

Meanwhile enquiries were proceeding. No one admitted to having fired that shot. But was it possible that someone could have done it without being aware of it?

I took brief walks in the forest Eliza and the Head Deaconess insisted that I should for my health’s sake. I wanted to spend every minute at his bedside; but I did realize the wisdom of what they said.

My walks invariably took me to the clearing; and one day my thoughts turned to Gerda and what had happened to her. She said she had met a devil in the woods; she had been seduced and nearly lost her life when she had taken the potion to get rid of her child.

I remembered talking to her grandmother. I had not seen Frau Leiben since I had returned to Kaiserwald. The door of her cottage had always been shut. I began to wonder then. I had thought Damien might have been that devil in the woods. Was that possible? Just suppose it was?

Just suppose Frau Leiben knew? Suppose she had fired that shot . for revenge?