“Come on. I can’t take care of you when I’m lying down.” There are so many things she can do for me lying down. My thoughts race to her riding my dick, sucking it, her pussy in my face, but I keep it all to myself. I am not scaring her off this time.

I’ve hurt her, bad. I watched at that moment as the entire spark left her beautiful eyes and I kick myself every damn day for doing it. I keep telling myself it was for the best, that she deserved better.

And she does. But I’m a selfish fucking prick and almost dying has put a few things in perspective. I don’t deserve her, but I need her. I need her like air. And this time, I am not fucking up. I can’t.

“You’re keeping me in bed. That’s all you’ve gotta do right now.” I need to feel her and her warmth, just having her here with me is already making every bit of pain evaporate. Whatever voodoo spell she has going on is sucking me in like a vise and I do not want to get the fuck out of it.

“You wanna watch TV?” She asks making me wonder why.

“Nope.”

“Okay.” She sighs.

“What’s wrong, Angel?” My hand rubs her boney hip absently. Her shorts are so damn short that my finger grazes her skin and even though she doesn’t say a word about it, the shudder of her body each time tells me she feels it too. The once plush body Casey had is now replaced with skin and bones. I’m almost afraid to squeeze too hard, afraid I may just break her. She is a shell of what she was the last time I saw her. But I just got her in my arms I’ll keep my mouth shut, for now.

“You scared me.” She mutters quietly.

“I’m good, Angel.”

She turns her head and rests her chin on my chest. Her eyes gaze up at me full of worry and concern. “I thought you died with Diamond. When Low told me what happened, there was a moment when I thought it was you. That you were gone.” Pain etches in her eyes and it kills me. I want to wipe it away and never see her hurt again.

“I’m here, Angel.” My arm glides up her back, hooking her arm, pulling her face to face with me. Lifting my head from the pillow, my lips connect with her soft cherry ones. Thinking she will hesitate, I’m surprised that she meets me move for move. My hand entangles in her hair, gripping it as I deepen the kiss. If I could crawl inside of her at this moment, I would. And I’d stay there, live there forever. Our kiss is passionate but lazy and I take my time. The intensity is there, but behind it is so much more. I pour everything I can into it, telling her without words how I feel for her and she meets me at every turn.

Her hand presses against the side of my face, while the other threads through my hair. I love her hands pulling me exactly where she wants me. Our tongues do some sort of rhythmic dance and I savor every second of it.

“Well, that didn’t take long.” Princess scoffs as she pushes the door open. Casey flies off the bed covering her mouth with her hand so fast I can’t catch her. The panic that spreads in her eyes is painful to watch. But I did that shit to her. I’m the one who created it. Now it is time to fix it.

“Don’t you know how to fucking knock?” I snarl at my sister.

“Nope. Time for your meds, brat.” She hands me a small cup as I sit up taking the pills and swallowing quickly. “Good to see you’re playing nice.”

“Mind your own fucking business.” I growl loudly making Angel jump. Instinctively I want to comfort her, but just sitting up causes my head to spin a bit. I wouldn’t make it over to her without falling.

“I have to go.” Casey says grabbing her bag.

“Where the hell are you going? You made a deal!” I bark out, thoroughly irritated with her.

“To my room. I have to get a few things.” She says hurriedly.

“When you come back, bring all your shit so you don’t have to leave again.” I demand.

“I’ll be back in a minute.” She breezes past Princess not looking her in the face. Fuck.

“What was that about?” Princess asks coming to the bed.

“What the fuck, Princess?” I growl.

“Down big guy.”

“Don’t you down me. You need to think before you do shit!” I yell.

“I just came to give you your meds. How the hell would I know you were lip locked with her?” She shrugs.

“You realize that I’m gonna flatten you out in the ring right?”

“Hard to do with one arm.” She smarts back radiating confidence.

“Fuck you.”

“No thanks.”

“Look, you need to tell me what the fuck is going on. I can’t take this shit anymore G.T. You’ve gotta talk to me.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“Bullshit. We fought. You remember that shit and then you still don’t talk to me. Explain that shit to me ‘cause I don’t get it.”

The night that Princess challenged me to fight, I couldn’t back down. I had to meet her inside the ring. I had mixed emotions about it. I needed to let off steam, but I really didn’t want to do it with my sister. But with each blow that she and I landed on each other, I felt a bit of relief. In no way did it help me forget Casey, but for those few minutes, I had something else to focus on.

“I was pissed at myself. Still am. Sorry, alright.” Looking away from her, I do not want her to see inside me. I hate that shit and she’s always been able to see inside of me, knowing there is more to it than I let on.

“Why are you pissed at yourself?”

“I’m not talking about it.” I stare at her determined to not answer.

“You know she loves you right.” My eyes shoot to Princess.

“What?”

“Casey. She loves you. She’s loved you since we were kids. Now this shit’s in your corner. If you fuck this up this time, she’ll never be yours.”

I hurt her before, allowing the club momma to kiss me. Fuck. Closing my eyes, I let the words seep into my body and down to my soul. I cut her deep. Deeper than I even thought I had the power to do. Shit.

“She never told me what happened between you two. I’m guessing you fucked around on her, by what little she did say.”

Growling I jump jerking my body towards her, “I didn’t fucking cheat on her.” I pause as Princess waited. “I just let her think I did.”

“Why the fuck would you do that?” Princess’ anger lets loose, her face turning bright red.

Rubbing my one good hand across my face, “It’s what needed to be done.”

“For who? Casey? Because I know, that’s a bunch of shit.”

“She deserves better.” She deserves so much better than my fucked up shit.

Princess got in my face. “You really are a fucking idiot.” Her words cut deep, but my anger took over, all-consuming rage burrowed through me.

“I’m not a fucking idiot!” I yell as Princess jumps back eyeing me warily. She didn’t say a word for the longest time just standing there staring.

“So that’s the reason. You don’t think you’re good enough for her because you don’t have some fancy degree, bullshit. Let me tell you something. Casey doesn’t give two shits about your education or lack thereof. She doesn’t care that you don’t sit in some office with a fucking suit on making millions of dollars. You know what she fucking wants. Loyalty. Honesty. Trust. She wants a man who only sees her and not the other millions of women in the world. She wants a man who treats her with respect and one she trusts to go out and not sleep with the entire female population. She wants you G.T. Now it’s up to you, to pull your head out of your ass and make it happen. Because I know. She’s the only one you want.”

“You fucking tell anyone about this conversation and I’ll pound your ass into the ground.”

Princess laughs. “Aww… Big bad biker doesn’t want anyone knowing he has a heart.”

“Shut. The. Fuck. Up.” I snarl. Princess’ laughter overtaking the room. I need her to fucking leave. Now.

“Decide what you want brother and figure it out. What’s this deal you made?”

“She has to stay with me for twenty-four hours and I promised to rest.”

“Good. Then use the time to your advantage.” Princess gave me a slight wave and leaves the room.

Use it to my advantage. The words ring in my ears and penetrated my head. I’d never had to seduce a woman or charm them. But with Casey, I’d be doing a lot of that. How? I have no fucking clue.

Chapter 8—Casey

Rummaging through all of my things, I need a distraction and escape from the guilt that is consuming me and eating me alive. Not even a day home with him and I’m kissing him like some hormonal teenager. I need to tell him, but shit, he can’t even freaking stand without passing out. How the hell is he going to react to having a child that I lost?

My stomach hurts the ache inside rising.

It’s only a kiss, right? Who am I fucking kidding? Not only was it a kiss, I want so much more out of it. As soon as his lips touched mine, fire seeped in my body, setting it ablaze. Everything with him feels so intense and knocks me on my ass every damn time. Shit.

I turn to the door as a loud knock comes upon it. Opening the door, a smiling Harlow stands there and I want to rip her damn eyes out. Not that I could, but I want to… badly. She knows too much.

“You love him. It’s what’s meant to happen.”

“I can’t be with him, Harlow. I knew coming home would be a mistake.” I shake my head, tired of repeating myself over and over again.

Harlow slams the door shut as she sits on the bed. I join her and wring my hands together. Looking down at my hands, I want to disappear. I want to tell her, I need to tell her. “Coming home was what was supposed to happen. Needed to happen. Fucking sucks it had to be like this, but we can’t change that. You and G.T. need to work this shit out.”

“What’s to work out, Harlow? He wants a variety of women and I can’t deal with that. It’s all or none with me.” And once I tell him about Mia, it will all be over.

Harlow grabs my leg steadying it when I don’t realize it is bouncing uncontrollably. “You need to talk to G.T., you may be surprised. Second, he’s going to kiss you again. You know this and next time, I may not be there to interrupt.” I nod. “I know my brother’s an ass, but you gotta know Casey, he loves you. He won’t admit it because he’s stubborn, but he does.”

“If a man loves you, he won’t want anyone else but you.”

“You need to talk to him about that, Casey.”

“What do you know?” I question, raising my brow.

“Not my place. Talk to him while you’re in there. None of this other petty bullshit. Fucking talk. And get this shit sorted out.”

“He told you?” She nods. “What was I thinking?” I say shaking my head frustrated with myself. This is such a bad idea, being locked in a room with him.

“Oh, I can only imagine. Doc said something about him staying put and he grabbed you, pulling you in.” She laughs. “He’s a smart man. Knew you would help him.”

I give her a small knowing smile because she is right and I went for it hook-line-and-sinker.

“I know that coming back to all this is a lot, but are you okay?” I look down at my hands. This is the time. My opening. I shake my head no.

“What’s wrong Casey? School not working out for ya?” I can’t hold it in any longer. The tears I’ve been doing such a good job of holding back fall from my face and splash onto my hands, my shoulders begin to shake. Everything in my body hurts and aches and my stomach twists in knots.

“Shit. Casey. What’s wrong?” The words will not leave my mouth, it’s like they’re lodged in my throat and I so desperately need them to come out. She wraps her arms around me and that’s when I really lose it. I’ve craved her since I found out about Mia. And now she’s here.

“Tell me what’s going on babe. I can help you.” She whispers into my neck, her hand glides up and down my body.

“I was pregnant, Low.” I sniffle into her neck, close enough to feel her entire body stiffen.

“Was?”

“I lost her about two weeks ago.” I sob uncontrollably.

“Oh God, Casey. Why didn’t you tell me? I would have been right there by your side.”

“I couldn’t. Everything with Babs happened and Cooper. Then Rocky… Everything was a mess. I couldn’t add to it.” I squeeze tighter not wanting to let go, needing her now more than ever.

“It was G.T.’s baby.” I nod my head in agreement. “And he doesn’t know anything about it.” Her words come out as statements of fact rather than being accusatory. “And you’ve been dealing with this all by yourself. You should have fucking told me.”

“No. I have two friends in Cherry Vale.”