I hadn’t doubted that for a second—okay, maybe a second—but hearing that helped.

“Oh fuck!” Grant groaned.

“What?”

I glanced over in the direction where he was looking, and I saw exactly what he’d meant.

Sydney had just shown up in the most outrageous outfit for a ski lodge. She was in a teeny-tiny skirt that showed off a large rose tattoo on the outside of her right thigh. She was shrugging out of a parka, and underneath was an insanely low black tank top, displaying her half sleeve. She was wearing some god-awful cowboy boots that made it look a bit like she was trying to be Daisy Duke. Eyes followed her as she approached us. She was all smiles while her boobs bounced with her wavy brown hair trailing behind her. If this was her normal clothing choice, I suddenly understood where she had disappeared to this afternoon.

“Hey, cuz,” she said in greeting.

“Didn’t I tell you to behave?”

“Didn’t I say I’d try?” She gestured down. “I tried…but failed. Now, where is Vin?”

My eyebrows shot up at that. Sydney is interested in Vin? Cheyenne was gorgeous and forward, but she didn’t dress like that.

Grant sighed and pointed Vin out. He was standing only a few feet away from us by the fire, chatting up some girl.

“Thanks,” she said with a wink. “Oh, Aribel…”

“Hey, Sydney,” I said softly.

I didn’t know what it was about her, but at that moment, she made me feel about two feet tall. I’d never be comfortable in an outfit like that, not that I needed that kind of outfit or anything. Wow. When did I turn into such a girl?

She flicked the dog tags hanging down between my breasts. “Nice necklace.”

“Thanks,” I said as she sauntered away. “She’s, uh…something.”

“Ignore her. She’s trouble.”

“Sounds like someone I know.”

“You have no idea,” he said, slapping me hard on the ass.

I squeaked, and that only made his insufferable smirk widen.

“Watch this,” he said, gesturing to Sydney. “It’ll be entertaining.”

My eyes returned to Sydney, who had since pushed the girl Vin had been talking with out of her way.

“Vin, baby,” she cooed, slithering into his grasp and running her hand temptingly down his chest.

“Sydney, I’ve fucking missed you.” His hands ran down her sides to grab her ass. He looked like he’d just won the jackpot.

“Oh God, it’s so good to see you. I’ve missed these huge muscles.” She grabbed his biceps and squeezed. Her eyes fluttered closed, like she was going to orgasm.

I almost felt rude for intruding.

I glanced over to Cheyenne. She was standing not too far off, and she was watching the whole scene, like everyone else. She was fuming, and her face was as red as her hair.

“Syd, you know you can have these…muscles anytime you want,” Vin said, thrusting her hips against him to emphasize exactly what he’d meant.

Her hand slipped between them, and his eyes widened further.

“I’ve been dreaming about your dick. Actually, I’ve been dreaming about you drilling it into me.”

“Let me take you upstairs right now and give it to you, baby,” he groaned. “I got all the dick you’ll ever need.”

“All four inches?” she asked with a devilish smirk. “Or is it five now?”

The watching crowd started laughing at her insult. I covered my mouth and shot Grant a look. He nodded his head back to them as if to say, It gets better.

“You know I’m a solid eight inches. Don’t even mess around.”

“Eight inches? What are you measuring with?” Her hands made quick work with his belt and then went for the zipper next. “Let me get a good look just to make sure.”

“You’ve fucking seen it before. The next time you see it, we’ll measure it inside your pussy where it belongs.”

“Oh, Vinny,” she cooed, “we all know you’re an ass man.” She winked.

“I’d fuck your ass, too.”

Sydney turned and shimmied her body down his and then back up, gripping his hips. Then, she wrapped her arms around his neck, tilted her head back, and planted a soft kiss on his cheek. “Maybe next time, lover,” she said before walking away from him.

“Is it just a game?” I asked, trying to comprehend what I’d just witnessed.

“One they’ve been playing since she got tits,” Grant told me. “Vin always made fun of her when she was a kid, and then she turned out…well, like Sydney. He’s wanted all over that ever since. I think she gets more amusement out of torturing him.”

“So, she’s not even interested in him?”

“Last I checked, no.”

“Still no,” Sydney said, coming up behind me. “No Vin for me, but I think your friend digs him.”

I turned back to Vin and saw that he had Cheyenne pressed against the side of the brick fireplace. Their lips were locked, and hands were roaming all over the place.

“So, are you going to come home for the holidays?” Sydney asked Grant. She seemed completely unperturbed by what had happened. “Randy was pissed that you missed Thanksgiving.”

Randy—that name sounds familiar. “Wait, Randy from the pizza place?”

“Uh…yeah,” Sydney said, eyeing me suspiciously. “Duffie’s.”

“Syd…” Grant said softly.

“Why would he be pissed that you missed Thanksgiving?” I asked hesitantly.

Grant just looked down.

Sydney answered for him, “Because Randy’s my dad. Sydney Duffie. Nice to meet you.”

My mouth dropped open as it all came together. Randy was Sydney’s dad. That made Randy…Grant’s uncle. No wonder they had been so accommodating when we were there. We’d had the best seat in the place. Randy had been so happy to see Grant and to see that he had brought a girl to the restaurant. I didn’t know why he hadn’t told me that it was his uncle’s place before this moment.

“You took me to Duffie’s and didn’t tell me that it was your uncle’s place?”

“Whoa! You took the chick home?” Sydney asked.

“Sydney,” Grant snapped, shaking his head.

“Um…what am I missing?” I asked.

“I know you said she didn’t know, Grant, but—”

“Sydney!” he practically shouted. He pointed away from him. “Go.”

Sydney rolled her big brown eyes. “Whatever. I’m going to go find Miller.”

I waited until he had calmed down a bit before speaking. “What don’t I know?”

“Ari, I can’t…” He took a deep breath. “There are some things that you don’t know about me.”

I nodded. There was a lot that he didn’t know about me. “I want to know though.”

“You might have a different impression about me.” He looked completely torn.

I wasn’t sure if it was because he didn’t want to tell me or because he really wanted to tell me.

“How could I have a different impression about you?”

He shook his head and glanced away from me. “I don’t really talk about it. The guys don’t even know. Well, they know some of it but not all of it.”

“The guys don’t know?” I was shocked.

They were his best friends. He’d known them since middle school. What could he tell me that he hadn’t even told them?

“Yeah.”

“Does this have something to do with your family?”

The last time he’d brought up his dad, he had completely clammed up, and now, Sydney had just been talking about his uncle. I didn’t know what it was, but I could piece together some context clues.

His eyes stared down at me in utter shock. “How…”

“Good guess.” I gently laced our fingers together.

His brow furrowed, and he looked like he was warring with himself. I’d never seen him look so…vulnerable.

“You can trust me,” I whispered.

His lips fell on top of mine, and the noise from the lodge and all the people in it disappeared.

“You know there’s never been anyone else like you in my life, Ari.”

My heart thudded in my chest. “I feel the same way.”

At that moment, the first band of the night started up onstage, and the crowd gravitated toward them.

“Come with me,” he said.

Then, he led me out of the ski lodge.


Chapter 29: Grant

I didn’t know what the fuck I was doing. I’d never fucking told anyone about this. I never fucking talked about it. I never even discussed it with the people who knew, like Sydney.

I didn’t touch those memories. They were the motherfucking crux of my emotionless existence. They ate at my very being and reminded me how much of a worthless piece of shit I was.

So, I tried everything to get rid of them.

I tried to outrun them.

I tried to drown them in booze, music, and sex.

I use any and everything to force them down deeper and deeper within me.

When that stuff had stopped working, I would fucking knock the memories upside the head with the flat side of a shovel, dig the memories’ graves with it, and bury them six feet under.

Ari was the only thing that had ever made me simply forget without trying, without self-medicating, without riding out a high. Now, I was going to take my only hope of forgetting and tell her what had happened?

She was the last person I wanted to know about it. I didn’t want to see the fear or pity or sorrow in her eyes. I didn’t want to get that from her. Maybe I should turn it around and just try to fuck her.

No. Fuck.

I didn’t fucking know.

So, I just kept my damn mouth shut as I guided her back to my room. We’d splurged on a suite so that we would all have more space and our own rooms. I left Ari in the living room to find some liquor in the mini bar. I poured myself whiskey on the rocks and her a glass of wine. She took it graciously, but I could tell that curiosity was burning a hole through her.

Even though she didn’t touch her drink, I took a long sip of the whiskey, letting the burning sensation spread through my stomach. I nodded my head toward the far wall, walked her over to the door, and opened it into the master suite. Her eyes widened, taking in the luxurious surroundings. I’d claimed the best room. It was lush with a massive bed, Jacuzzi tub, walk-in shower, and the best view of the mountains.

I’d thought I’d be fucking her here tonight, not telling her about my past. I guessed she deserved to know the kind of person she was going to give herself to—that was, if she even wanted me afterward.

“Grant,” she whispered.

I glanced up at her and tried to push down my rising desire at seeing her gorgeous body here in my suite, standing by my bed. It was a defense mechanism. I just wanted to bury myself in her and forget everything.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

I sighed and made up my mind. “Yes, I do.”

“I can tell that you’re beating yourself up about it. I just didn’t want you to think that you had to do anything just because Sydney had slipped and mentioned it.”

Fuck. This woman. She was too good to me

“Just take a seat,” I told her. If I’m going to do this, then I need to do it now.

“Okay,” she said softly, hoisting herself up onto the bed with her feet dangling.

I paced back and forth, not sure where to start.

Here goes nothing.

“I grew up as a military brat. Born in Knoxville and moved all over the country for the next eight years before we landed at Fort Benning in Columbus, Georgia.”

“I thought you grew up down the shore?” Ari asked.

“I’ll get to that.” I ran a hand back through my hair and started pacing again. “My dad…well, I’m still not sure what he did for the Army. He was gone a lot, so my mom basically raised me. He had been deployed overseas and one day, when he came back, and he was different. I was only nine years old, so my mom didn’t give me any details.”

Ari wrung her hands in her lap. Her face was a mask of concern. “Did something happen to him overseas that made him different?”

“Yeah. He set a house on fire, but they hadn’t gotten all the civilians out. He could still hear their screams when he went to sleep.”

Ari’s hands flew to her mouth. Her face was stricken. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry yet,” I said grimly. “My dad insisted that he didn’t need to see any doctors. He just needed some fresh air to clear his head. He retired from the Army, moved us back to Knoxville, and spent the next year skinning squirrels alive in the woods.”

She flinched at my brusque tone.

I wished there were another way to tell this story. I wished there wasn’t a story.