her.

"How was the tournament?" Jill finally asked.

He shrugged. "Okay."

She nodded and raised her eyebrows. "And did you win?"

His laugh was sarcastic. "Oh, Jill, stop pretending like you have an interest in our baseball

team."

She started to protest but thought better of it. There was no point in arguing the truth.

"Okay." She stood, tossing the rest of her tea down the sink and rinsing out her glass. "I'm

assuming your sandwich is not just an appetizer. If you don't want any of this chicken, I'll

put it up."

He laughed again. "Yeah, I know you went to a lot of trouble with dinner but this sandwich

is just fine."

She gripped the countertop hard then spun around. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Oh, now that's a silly question, Jill."

She shook her head. "What do you want me to do?"

"I want you to be a goddamned wife, that's what I want," he yelled. He tossed his uneaten

sandwich on the table and stormed from the room.

She leaned her head back, glancing to the ceiling with eyes closed, trying to hold on to just

a tiny portion of the euphoric feeling she'd left with from Carrie's. But being back home—

away from Carrie—it was hard to keep her spirit up, not when she was thrust smack into

the middle of her rapidly unraveling life.

She took a deep breath, following after Craig as he ran up the stairs. She found him coming

out of their bedroom with his pillow and a handful of clothes. She stopped, her eyes moving

from the clothes to his face, his eyes angry as he looked back at her.

"What's left, Jill?" He shrugged. "This is it, isn't it? Me moving out of your bed?" Again,

the sarcastic laugh. "We have a goddamned king-size bed and I haven't touched so much as

your big toe in months. I don't see the point anymore."

She supposed he thought she would argue, would beg him not to move into the spare room

but she looked at him with indifference. "As you wish," she said quietly.

He shook his head. "You're unbelievable. You can't even fight about it."

"Fight about what? You know how I feel. Do you think it suddenly changed overnight?"

He stared at her for a long moment. "What did you do today?"

"What do you mean?" she asked, hoping her face did not reveal the inner turmoil she was

feeling.

"You weren't home. What did you do all day?"

She didn't bother to ask how he knew this. Arlene had no doubt come by to check on her.

"I was out and about," she said with as much casualness as she could muster. "Had errands,

shopping."

His eyes narrowed. "You left before nine and didn't come home until after six," he stated,

his tone accusing.

But she squared her shoulders. "There's really no need to have Arlene spy on me, Craig.

It's certainly none of her business what I do on my own time."

"Fine. You want to continue this charade then so be it. Let me know when you're ready to

tell me the truth."

He walked purposefully into the spare room, firmly closing the door behind him. She stared

at the door for a moment, then turned, surprised to find Angie standing in the hallway.

Their eyes met but Jill looked away, not knowing what to say to her daughter. She had

most likely heard their entire conversation.

"Why don't you just get it over with?"

Jill walked down the stairs, ignoring her, hoping she would just go back into her room. But

she followed Jill into the kitchen.

"What are you waiting for?" Angie asked.

"Angie, this is between me and your father. You don't know what's going on."

"I do know," she said loudly. "He's moved into the other room because you're having an

affair," she accused.

"Angie, I'm not."

"Liar! Quit lying to me," she screamed. "You're seeing another man!"

"I'm not. I swear I'm not."

"You're lying! You're lying," she said again. "Why can't you just tell Daddy the truth? Just

get it over with so I don't have to worry day after day what's going to happen."

"Angie, it's not that simple." She spread her hands. "And nothing's going to happen to you."

"Yes it is. You're going to get a divorce and make me leave here. You're going to move

somewhere and make me go with you. Well, I don't want to go with you," she yelled. "I hate

you! I want to stay with Daddy!"

She ran from the kitchen, her feet pounding on the stairs as she hurried back to her room.

Jill heard the door slam and she hesitated, torn between comforting her daughter and her

own fears. Carrie was right. If Angie found out about their relationship, it would ruin the

fragile bond between mother and daughter. Angie would never understand, especially at her

age.

She sank down heavily in the chair, staring at the half-eaten sandwich Craig had flung

there earlier. She felt alienated. Even in her own kitchen, surrounded by familiar things,

she felt little more than a stranger in her own home.

She leaned her elbows on the table, resting her chin on her hands as she stared across the

room. Little by little, their accusations began to fade, being replaced by much more

pleasant words, snippets of conversations between Carrie and herself, softly spoken words

of love passing between them in their most fervent moments of passion, teasing words as

they sat side by side at the pier, and then no words at all as they held hands by the flower

garden, admiring their work as the clock slowly ticked the time away.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

As soon as Jill walked into the cottage on Monday afternoon, she knew something was

wrong. Carrie, who normally greeted her at the door, was at the pier, standing alone,

staring out at the lake. Jill tossed her purse on the bar and made her way down the path,

past the flower garden to the pier, her heels clicking on the wooden boards. Carrie turned

at the sound, her eyes showing her surprise.

"Is it one already?"

"Yes." Jill tilted her head slightly, watching Carrie. "What's wrong?"

Carrie waved her hand dismissively. "Oh, nothing." She walked closer, wrapping her arms

around Jill's waist and pulling her into a tight hug. "Saturday was fantastic and I missed

you like crazy yesterday."

Jill smiled, pulling her head away to look at Carrie, then bending closer, lightly kissing her

on the mouth. "Yesterday was endless," Jill agreed. "In fact, this morning was endless."

She pulled out of Carrie's embrace, watching her, trying to read her eyes. There was a

wounded look there she'd never seen before. She took Carrie's hand and led her to their

bench. "Now tell me what's wrong."

Carrie looked away. "Oh, it's nothing. Just a bad day yesterday."

"Then tell me about it. We've talked about everything. There aren't any secrets between

us. Are there?"

"It's not that," Carrie said. She clutched her hands together as she stared at the lake.

"It's just, yesterday morning, James... he confessed that he's been having an affair," she

said quietly.

Jill's eyes widened. "Oh, God, I'm sorry." Then she frowned. "Is that the proper thing to

say, given our circumstances?"

Carrie smiled slightly and shrugged. "I feel like an ass. I mean, here he was, so eaten up

with guilt that he had to confess, and I just sat there, stunned."

"You didn't say anything?"

"We didn't have a screaming match, if that's what you mean. James and I have never been

big fighters. It was all so calm and civilized. Of course, I don't know what my reaction

would have been had I not been involved with you."

She stood, pacing, and Jill stayed quiet, waiting for Carrie to talk it out.

"She's the assistant manager at one of his stores," she said finally. Again a quiet laugh.

"She's thirty-one. And good God, she's married too. I mean, what was he thinking?"

"So what did you say to him?"

"I asked him how long it had been going on," she said. "Since last fall." She turned and

stared out over the lake. "Now I guess I know why he hasn't been concerned with our lack

of a sex life." She turned back around. "God, that sounded just like the victimized wife,

didn't it?"

"Well, it's a shock. I mean, you never suspected, did you?"

Carrie shook her head. "No. Of course I haven't really given anything a whole lot of

thought lately." She sighed. "But that's not why I'm upset, Jill. I mean, how can I be upset

with him for having an affair? No, I'm upset with myself. I had the perfect opportunity to

tell him about you, about us. Yet I didn't." She walked back to the bench and sat down

again. "And like a typical wife, I let him wallow in his guilt, let him beg for forgiveness, let

him plead with me not to tell the boys. And all the while I'm thinking what an ass I am."

Jill linked arms with her. "But why did he tell you? Does he want to be with this woman?"

Carrie shook her head. "No. Like I said, she's married, has kids. It was just something that

happened."

"And is still happening?"

"No. And I think that was why the guilt got to him." She sighed. "He said he thought maybe

I was having my own affair and that was why I didn't miss him being around."

"Oh."

"I still couldn't tell him. If I'd told him, then everything would have focused on me and it

would be like his little affair just went away, because mine is a bit bigger, seeing as how

you're a woman and all," she said with a hint of a laugh. Then she buried her head in her

hands. "What a mess," she muttered.

Jill leaned closer and bumped her shoulder. "Well, speaking of messes, Craig has officially

moved into the spare room."

Carrie looked up. "It's gone that far?"

"And Angie confronted me. She has informed me that she hates me and if we get a divorce

she wants to stay with Craig."

"Oh no."

Jill shrugged. "She's fourteen. She's supposed to hate her mother."

"And Craig?"

Jill sighed. "I don't know." She turned, looking at Carrie, falling into her eyes. "What are

we going to do?"

"I won't lie, Jill. I've thought of us being together. How wonderful it would be to go to

sleep with you at night, to hold each other, to wake together to greet a new day. How

wonderful would that be?" She turned, her eyes moving across the water. "But this is so

foreign to us both." She laughed. "We don't exactly have experience at being lesbians."

Jill laughed too, slipping her arm around Carrie's shoulders and following her gaze out over

the water.

"But I worry about you," Carrie continued. "You and Angie. If she left your life, if she could

never forgive you, would you eventually grow to resent me, resent us}" she asked quietly.

"And is what we have worth you losing a child?"

Jill nodded, her eyes slipping closed. "In other words, you don't know what we're going to

do either."

Carrie turned, her eyes softening as she saw the love Jill didn't try to hide. She leaned

closer, her kiss feather-light. "I don't have a clue," she whispered.

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

"Feel like going to the park?" Carrie asked one warm, sunny day weeks later.

Jill laughed. "You miss the ducks?"

Carrie held up a loaf of bread, her eyes smiling. "I have an urge."

Jill walked closer, her arms sliding around Carrie's waist. "An urge, huh?" She pulled them

together, loving the familiarity of their embrace, loving the gentle kiss they shared. "I

would love to go to the park with you."

"Wonderful. And just so you don't starve, I made us sandwiches to take along."

Jill pulled away, seeing the paper sack on the bar. She nodded and smiled. "Just like old

times."

"Do you mind?"

"Of course not." She reached for the sack. "It'll be fun." Or so she thought until she saw

the crowded parking lot minutes later. She groaned loudly. "Good God. Half the town's