Виктория Холт - The Devil on Horseback

You could become a farmer’s wife, perhaps . and let me tell you this, that would be the greatest tragedy of all. “

“You seem to know a great deal about my private affairs.”

I make a point of learning what interests me. “

“But I cannot do what you suggest.”

“For such an intelligent young woman you say some foolish things sometimes. But then I know you do not mean them so it does not alter my opinion of you. I am interested in you, Mademoiselle. Are you not in charge of my daughter and going to take an even closer interest in her? I want you to leave as soon as possible but I understand that you will have matters to clear up. I am a reasonable man. I would not wish to hurry you too much and fortunately we have a little time.”

“You go too fast.”

“I always go fast. It is the best way to travel. But you will find it not too fast. Just the right speed. Well, the matter is settled then and we can get down to details.”

The matter is far from settled. Suppose I agreed . suppose I stayed with Margot until the child is born, what then? “

“There would be a position for you in my household.”

“Position? What position?”

That we can decide on. You will be Marguerite’s cousin during your stay in the house where I shall send you. Perhaps you could continue to be that. I have always found that when practising deception it is well to be consistent. One should keep as near to the truth as possible and keep the fiction plausible throughout. Fact and fiction must be skilfully woven to give an impression of complete truth, and once having established yourself as a cousin, it may be that it would be well for you to continue in that role. Your nationality provides difficulties. We must have it that the daughter of a great-great-great-grandfather married into England and you are from a branch of that family tree, which makes you a cousin, though a remote one. You will be Marguerite’s companion and look after her. She will need looking after. This episode has proved that. Is that not a good proposition? It gets you out of your difficulties and me out of mine.

”It seems quite outrageous. “

The best things in life can be just that. I will start making arrangements without delay. “

“I have not yet agreed to come.”

“But you will, for you are a woman of sound good sense. You make your mistakes like most of us but you will not repeat them. I know that and I want you to endow Marguerite with some of your good sense. She is a wayward child, I fear.” He stood up and came to my chair. I also stood and faced turn. He laid his hands on my shoulders and I was vividly reminded of that other occasion in his bedroom. I think he was too, for he sensed my shrinking and it amused him.

“It is always a mistake to be afraid of life,” he said, “Who said that I was afraid?”

“I can read your thoughts.”

Then you are very clever. “

“You will discover how clever … in time, perhaps. Now I am going to be kind as well as clever. This has come as a shock to you. You had no idea of the proposition I was going to put to you and I can see the thoughts turning over and over in your mind. My dear Mademoiselle, face the facts. The school is in decline; this affair of my daughter has shocked members of the gentry.

You may say it was none of your affair but Marguerite was at your school and you have had the misfortune to attract the heir of Derringham. You cannot help being charming, but these people are not as far-seeing as I am. They will say you set out to catch him and the Derringhams found out in time and sent him off. Unfair, you say. You had no intention of trapping this young man. But it is not always what is true that counts. I give your school another six months . perhaps eight . and then what? Come, be sensible. Be Marguerite’s cousin. I will see that you need not be worried with finances again.

Get away from the schoolhouse of sad memories. I know of the love between you and your mother. What can you do here but brood? Get away from slander, from gossip. Mademoiselle, this unfortunate state of affairs can bring a new life to you. “

So much of what he was saying was true. I heard myself murmur: “I cannot decide immediately.”

He gave a little sigh of relief.

“No, no. It asks too much. You shall have today and to, morrow to decide. You will think about this and the plight of my daughter. She is fond of you. When I told her what I proposed she became happy. She loves you. Mademoiselle. Think of her distress. And think of your future too.”

He took my hand and kissed it. I was ashamed of the emotion it aroused in me and I hated myself for being so impressed by such a philanderer, which I was sure he was.

Then he bowed and left me.

Thoughtfully I returned to the schoolhouse.

I sat up late that night going through the books. In any case I knew I could not sleep. The effect that man had on me astonished me. He repelled me and yet attracted me. I could not! get him out of my mind.

To be in his house . to have a position there . a sort of cousin!

I should be a ‘poor relation’, a sort of companion to Margot. Well, what was I going to do otherwise? I did not have to be told that the school was in decline. People were going to blame me for Margot’s indiscretion andl was it true that they were hinting that I had tried to trap Joel Derringham into marriage? The dressmaker would know of the dresses my mother had had made; she had probably been shown the dress lengths in the cupboard. I had a new horse that I might ride with Joel. Oh, I could guess what these people were saying.

Desperately I longed for the calm guidance I could have had from my mother, and suddenly I knew that I could never be happy in this schoolhouse without her. There were too many memories. Everywhere I turned I could picture her so clearly.

I wanted to get away. Yes, the Comte was right, I would face the truth. The thought of going to France, of standing by Margot until her child was born, and then going to live in the Comte’s household excited me, drew me away from my sense of loss and grief more surely than I had thought anything could do.

No wonder I could not sleep.

All through the day I was absent-minded as I taught my classes. It had been so much easier when the pupils were divided between my mother and myself. She had taken the older ones and I could cope easily with the younger. Before I had taken on the role of teacher she had managed quite well, but even she had said what a boon it was to have two of us. She had been a born teacher. I was something less than that.

All through the day I thought of the opportunity which was being offered to me, and it began to seem like an adventure which could restore my interest in life.

When school was over Margot called. She threw herself into my arms and hugged me.

“Oh, Minelle, you are coming with me, then! It does not seem half as bad if you are going to be there. Papa told me. He said: ” Mademoiselle Maddox will take care of you. She is thinking about it but I have no doubt that she will come. ” I felt happier than I have for a long time.”

It’s by no means settled,” I told her. I have not yet made up my mind.”

“But you will come, won’t you? Oh, Minelle, if you say No, what shall I do?”

“I am not really necessary to the plan. You will go away quietly into the country where your child will be born and put out to foster parents. From there you will go to your father’s household and carry on from there. It is not an uncommon story in families like yours, I believe.”

“Oh, so coo’ll So precise! You are just what I need. But Minelle, dear, dear Minelle, I shall have to go through life with this dark, dark secret. I shall need support. I shall need you. Papa says you are to be my cousin. Cousine Minelle! Does that not sound just right? And after this horrible business is over we shall be together. You are the only reason I like it here.”

“What about James Wedder?”

“Oh, that was fun for a while, but look what it brought me to. It is not as bad as I feared it might be. I mean Papa … he was thunderous at first… despising me … and it was not for having an affaire, you know. It was because I had been so foolish as to become pregnant. He said he might have known I had a touch of the wanton in me. But if you will only come with me, Minelle, it will be all right.

I know it will. You will come . you must. “

She had got to her knees and folded her hands together as in prayer.

“Please, please. God, make Minelle come with me.”

“Get up and don’t be so silly,” I said.

“This is not the time for histrionics.”

She went into peals of laughter which was, I commented, scarcely becoming to a fallen woman.

“I need you, Minelle,” she cried.

“You make me laugh. So serious .. and yet not really so. I know you, Minelle. You try to play the schoolmistress, but you could never be a real one. That’s what I always believed. Joel was a fool. My father said he is stuffed with sawdust… not good red blood.”

Why should he say that about Joel? “

“Because he went away when Papa Derringham said he must. Papa sneers at that.”

“Does he sneer at you for going where he sends you?”

That is different. Joel was not pregnant. ” The laughter bubbled up again. I could not make up my mind whether this was hysteria or sheer fecklessness. But I felt my spirits lifted by her inconsequential conversation. Moreover, when she implored me to go with her, there was real panic in her eyes.

“I can bear it all if you are there,” she said more seriously.

“It will be fun . , . almost. I’ll be the young married lady whose husband has died suddenly. My staid cousin-English, but still a cousin due to a mesalliance years ago is with me to look after me.

She is just the right one to do it because she is so calm and cool and a little severe. Oh Minelle, you will come. You must. “

“Margot, I still have to think. It is a big undertaking and I have not yet made up my mind.”

“Papa will be furious if you refuse.”

“His feelings are no concern of mine.”

But they are of mine. At the moment he is making light of the matter.

That is because he has a solution and you are part of it. You will come, Minelle. I know you will. If you don’t I shall die of despair.”

She chattered on, her eyes sparkling. She was not a bit afraid, she said, if I would come with her. She talked as though we were about to embark on some wonderful holiday together. It was foolish, but I began to catch her excitement.

I knew perhaps I had known all along that I was going to accept this challenge. I must escape from this house, become so gloomy with the light of my mother’s presence removed from it; I must get away from the vaguely menacing shadow of poverty which was beginning to encroach. But it was like taking a step into the unknown.

I dreamed again that night that I was standing outside the schoolhouse, but it was not the familiar scene I saw there. Ahead of me lay a wood the trees thick together. I believed it was an enchanted wood and I was going to walk through it. Then I saw the Comte. He was beckoning to me.

I awoke. Certainly I had made up my mind.

 Petit Montlys was a charming small town some hundred miles south of Paris, sheltering in the shadow of its bigger sister town known as Grand Montlys. It was the end of April when we arrived. I had sold my furniture with the help of Sir John and had taken Jenny over to the Mansers, asking them to look after her. Sir John himself paid me a good price for Dower and promised that if I returned to England he would sell her back to me for the price my mother had paid for her. I was to receive a salary from the Comte which was handsome by any standards and only when the burden was lifted from my shoulders did I realize how anxious I had been about my financial situation.

Mrs. Manser shook her head over my decision. Clearly she disapproved.

She did not know, of course, that Margot was pregnant, but thought I was taking a post as her companion in the Comte’s household, which was the story the Derringhams put about.

“You’ll be back,” she prophesied. I give you no more than a couple of months. There’ll be a room for you here. Then I reckon you’ll know which side your bread is buttered. “