Victoria Holt - The House of a Thousand Lanterns

After the meal I went up to Jason’s room where he had been eating under the supervision of Lottie. She had been telling him about the feast downstairs and how the goddess would be pleased with us because although each of us was a fân-kuei we had acted as good Chinese.

Jason was excited at the prospect of seeing the procession and by now the big lantern which was to hang over our porch had been lighted and shone like a beacon.

We all went down to the waterfront which was the best place to see the revelry. And what a sight it was. From every sampan there rose a lantern. There were greens, blues, mauves—every conceivable color was represented with red predominating. There were simple lanterns and ornate lanterns. There were silk lanterns and paper lanterns. Many of them sported revolving scenery which was contrived in the same manner as the one which adorned our porch. There were revolving ships, idols, butterflies, and birds. It was as though everyone had vied to make a more glorious lantern than his neighbor. I shall always associate these occasions with the sound of the gong. One heard it constantly and it never failed to arouse a certain apprehension in me. It always sounded like a warning.

Adam held Jason in his arms so that he could see everything. Jason was shouting to us all to look at this and that. Lottie stood beside me, quietly proud of the display. On the sea were ships dressed up as dragons. Lights shone through the paper and some of them breathed fire. It was a colorful display and even more interesting than the lanterns were the crowds who had assembled to take part in or watch the revelry. Men in the magnificent robes of mandarins mingled with the coolies. Hakka women in their wide black-fringed hats stood side by side with other workers from the paddy fields, and servants from rich families, as the procession of lanterns wound its way along the waterfront. Beneath die lanterns a row of men bore a massive dragon; the men writhed and gyrated as they went to represent the movements of the great beast. Within the framework were lights so that it presented quite a terrifying appearance, jaws open with fire coming through and lights showing in its great eyes.

Jason was beside himself with a delighted fear.

Then the fireworks started.

Jason and Lottie seemed of an age in their excitement, and watching them I was more reconciled to my fate than I had ever been. It was to be but a brief satisfaction.

In due course we were rickshawed back to the house. We went into the room we had made our drawing room and Lottie took Jason off to bed. Sylvester was talking in the animated way he had when he was discussing Chinese customs.

He was saying: “There must always be a dragon. The dragon dominates the lives of the Chinese. He is the bogyman of China. They fear him, they seek to placate him, and sometimes to destroy him. He is supposed to be all powerful. I was here once at the time of an eclipse. It was then believed that the dragon, suffering from an insatiable hunger, was trying to swallow the sun. The beating of the gongs was terrific. They were supposed to be frightening the dragon. Yet I have seen a feast to honor him many a time.”

Toby, who had not come back to the house with us, arrived at that moment. He was clearly excited.

He said: “A ship is in the harbor. It comes from home.”

* * *

I was awakened in the night by Jason who had had a dream of a firebreathing dragon. He was sure he was outside the window trying to get in. I took him into my bed as I had on the first night and explained that the dragons were made of paper and it was men inside them who made them move.

“It’s true here in your bed,” he whispered. “But it changes in mine.”

So I kept him with me and as he slept I was overwhelmed by my love for him and I thought that as long as I had him to plan for, to live for, I could be content. I thought again of Sylvester and how good he had been to me and I vowed to myself that I would look after him and always share his interests. I would be at the Go-Down tomorrow and with Toby I would learn what goods had arrived for us and I would take an account of these to Sylvester for I would insist on his resting after the previous night’s feast and procession.

I was up early and when I was dressed Lottie came to tell me that, early as it was, there was a visitor.

Lottie looked a little secretive and did not meet my gaze, but perhaps I thought this afterwards. However I went down through the quiet house to the drawing room where Lottie told me the visitor waited.

I opened the door. Then I thought I was going to faint, for rising from a chair and coming towards me was Joliffe.

He stood before me gazing at me, and my feelings were such as I could not describe so overwhelming were they. Such joy it was to see him again, yet that joy was tinged with fear as to what his coming would mean.

He said “Jane!” That was all, but it said so much. There was longing and the pain of separation, the joy of reunion, and there was hope.

I clung to my composure and kept my distance. I thought: If he doesn’t touch me I can be calm. I can stand outside this scene. I can make it seem as though some other person is taking the part of Jane and I am but a looker-on. But if he were to put his hands on my shoulders; if he were to draw me to him…

That must not happen.

I said: “What are you doing here, Joliffe?”

He must have realized that we had to talk of rational things, for he answered: “I came in on the ship.”

“You will stay…?”

“For a while,” he said.

“But…”

I was becoming involved. I thought: We can’t both stay here. There’s not room for us. We shall see each other often and how can we do that?

He said: “How are you, Jane?”

“I am well.”

He laughed. “And… happy?”

“We have an interesting life here.”

“Oh Jane!” he said reproachfully, “why did you do it?”

“I don’t understand.”

“Don’t pretend. You understand perfectly. Why did you marry my uncle?”

“I have told you before.”

“You should have waited.”

I turned away. It was fatal, for he had laid his hand on my arm and in a second I was held against him and all the magic was there again; and I knew that I had been living in a false contentment. I knew I would never be happy without Joliffe.

“No, no,” I said breaking away. “This must not be.”

“I’m free now, Jane,” he said.

“And Bella?”

“Bella is dead.”

“That was convenient… for you, wasn’t it?”

“Poor Bella! She never recovered from the accident.”

“She seemed very strong and healthy when we met.”

“She was badly injured in the accident. How badly was not realized. It was only much later that this became apparent. The accident had started up something… an internal growth. She had only a few years to live.”

“And now, you’re free as you say.”

“The pity is… you’re not.”

I walked to the window.

I said: “Listen, Joliffe, there must be no more of this.”

He was beside me. “What do you mean? No more of what? How can there be no more of something that exists?”

“I am settled here. I want no complications. What was between us is over.”

“What a monstrous thing to say. You know it will never be over… as long as either of us lives.”

“You shouldn’t have come here. Why did you?”

“I have my work. It brings me here. But most of all I came to tell you I was free.”

“Of what interest should that be to me?”

“I wanted you to realize how wrong you were. You should never have married my uncle. If you had not the way would be clear for us now.”

“And my son?”

“Our son! I would have cared for him… and for you.”

“I believe I did the right thing. And having done it… I hope I shall continue to do what is right. Go away, Joliffe. I don’t want us to meet.”

“I must see you. I’ve sworn I won’t go on as before. I want to see my son.”

“No, Joliffe.”

“He is my son, you know.”

“He is happy here. He looks on Sylvester as his father. I don’t want him disturbed. Joliffe, how can you come here… to this house… of all places.”

“It used to be one of my homes. Where else should I go?”

“You can’t stay here.”

“You’re afraid. You shouldn’t be afraid of life, Jane.”

“We should all be afraid of doing what is not right.”

“My poor Jane!”

“Poor Jane! Poor Bella! Perhaps we are both to be pitied for becoming involved with you.”

“You will never be sorry for that.”

“I want you to go away, Joliffe.”

He looked intently at me and shook his head, and at that moment the door opened and Jason ran in.

He stood for a moment looking from me to Joliffe.

Joliffe grinned at him and a slow smile broke over Jason’s face.

“This is Uncle Adam’s cousin,” I said. I saw Joliffe grimace slightly in my direction.

“Have you got a kite?” asked Jason.

“No, but I had one when I was a boy.”

“What sort?”

“Made with bamboo, horn and varnish. It had a dragon on it.”

“Breathing fire?”

“Breathing fire,” said Joliffe. “Nobody ever flew a kite higher than I did.”

“I did,” said Jason.

Joliffe put his head on one side and shook it slowly.

“We’ll have a race,” said Jason excitedly.

“Yes, one day we’ll have a race.”

Lottie had come in. “I’m here, Lottie,” said Jason. “Where’s my kite?”

Joliffe and Lottie looked at each other. She knelt and put her forehead on the floor. Jason solemnly imitated her.

Joliffe took her hand and helped her to her feet.

She answered: “Great master is gracious.”

To see her standing there, her hand in his, for he retained it for a second or so, looking so young and beautiful sent a pang of jealousy through me.

I said: “Jason, will you go with Lottie. It’s time you had your breakfast.”

“Is Uncle Adam’s cousin going to have breakfast?”

“I expect he will somewhere.”

Jason stood looking at Joliffe and I could see the admiration in his eyes. I wondered what his reaction would have been if I had said: This is your father.

“You come and have breakfast with me,” said Jason.

“That is not possible,” I said sharply. “Go now.”

“We shall see each other later,” added Joliffe.

“Bring your kite,” said Jason.

“I will,” said Joliffe.

They went out.

“My God, Jane,” he said, “that’s a fine boy.”

“Please, Joliffe, this is a difficult state of affairs. Don’t complicate it.”

“You helped to complicate it.”

“In innocence,” I said. “But don’t let’s go into that now. I shall ask Sylvester what’s to be done. I shall tell him that you have been here.”

“Good and obedient wife,” he said bitterly. And I knew that the sight of me and of Jason and the thought that we were lost to him filled him with grief and anger.

I also knew enough of him to understand that he was not like myself. He would not accept a situation and try to make the best of it.

Joliffe wouldn’t compromise.

I left him and went to Sylvester’s room. He had not risen but Ling Fu had brought him breakfast and he was sitting up in bed having it.

“You’re up early, Jane,” he said. “The ship…” He paused. “Is something wrong?”

I said: “Joliffe came in on the ship. He is here.”

“In this house?”

I nodded.

“He must go away,” said Sylvester.

“He says his work has brought him here.”

“I can’t send him back to England but at least he shall not stay in this house.”

Now everything was changed. It must be so because Joliffe was in Hong Kong. I could no longer accept my fate; I must rebel against it. There was only one way to peace of mind and that was in forgetting Joliffe, which was something I could never do.

He had had an interview with Sylvester. I don’t know what was actually said but the gist of it was that although Adam was staying in the house there was no place there for Joliffe. In view of his one-time relationship with me that was quite impossible.

Joliffe had no alternative but to accept this while at the same time he made it clear that he wished to see his son. I knew him well enough to understand that he would use Jason as an excuse.