She ran across the square when she saw him, beaming at him, and without saying a word to her, he pulled her into his arms and kissed her. He also had taken his Roman collar off and left it and his jacket in the car. He looked like a man in a short-sleeve black shirt and matching pants, and attracted no attention.

“I'm so glad to see you,” he said breathlessly, walking slowly beside her, and excited to be out in the world with her for the first time. It was a world full of colors and excitement and people, even at that hour. There were children with balloons, couples on benches talking and holding hands, old men playing chess, and the canopy of trees overhead softened the summer sunshine. He bought her an ice cream from a passing cart, and they sat down on a bench together. He was smiling at her, and she had never seen him as happy, as they kissed and held hands and ate their ice cream. It was like a dream for them, a dream that could easily become a nightmare, but neither of them could think about that now.

“Thank you for meeting me here, Gabbie.” He looked at her gratefully, and knew only too well how hard it was for her to get out. But their long wait for these few hours made them even more precious to them. They didn't waste a single moment, but talked about everything, shared as many thoughts as they could in the short time they had, and kept themselves focused on the present rather than the future. He wanted to know how soon she thought they could meet again, and she had no idea what to say to him. This seemed like such a miracle to both of them that it was difficult to imagine doing it again, but she knew she had to. The moments they shared at St. Matthew's now seemed like crumbs. It was so wonderful to be out in the world together, and feel so free with each other.

“I'll do what I can. I think Mother Emanuel will let me do errands for her again. I don't think anyone will object, as long as I get everything done, and don't disappear for too many hours.” The nuns always broke the rules for her, they always had, and she had always been extremely helpful to them. There was no reason for that to stop now, as long as she did what she had to with the other postulants. She hadn't written a word all week, but she had still managed to work for hours in the garden.

“I'd love to go to Central Park with you sometime, or walk by the river.” There were so many things he wanted to do with her, and they had so little time in which to do them.

He walked her back to the car at eleven-thirty, and the moments they had shared had been so well filled they seemed like hours to them. Their time together had been everything they hoped it would be, and it made them hungrier still to meet again. They both knew what the dangers were, the risk to them potentially, yet it was too late for either of them to turn back. He kissed her one last time, and she could feel his body so close to her that it startled her at first, and then she relaxed and seemed to melt into his arms.

“Take care of yourself, Gabbie. Be careful. Don't say anything to anyone,” he warned unnecessarily, and she smiled at him.

“Not even to Sister Anne?” she teased, and he grinned. He wanted to take her back, to be with her, to call her that night. He wanted to do all the things men in love did, and he never had. At thirty-one, he had never loved a woman, never allowed himself to even think of it. He had never had a crush, never flirted, never allowed himself the kind of fantasies he had now. But for him, it was like the opening of a dam. And once open, it was impossible to stop the avalanche of feelings that overtook him.

He stood next to the car and watched her put her coif back on. She looked like a little girl to him, as she looked up at him with her huge blue eyes. Just seeing her like that made him want to run away with her right then. And neither of them had the vaguest idea when they would be able to meet this way again.

“I'll see you in the confessional tomorrow,” she said cautiously, and he nodded at her, wanting so much more of her. He hated to let her leave him.

“Do you still have the keys to the locked room?” he asked hopefully, and she smiled at him.

“I know where they are.”

It was dangerous, but better than the whispers they shared in the confessional. He already wanted more of her than he had now.

They kissed one last time, and as she drove away, she waved at him, and drove back through the mid-town traffic as fast as was allowed. She got back to St. Matthew's easily, and one of the other postulants came out to help her unload the car. The bolts of fabric were heavy, but Gabriella felt as though she had the strength of ten after the time she had just spent with Joe, and the tenderness they d shared.

She had lunch with the other nuns, worked in the garden that afternoon, arrived at dinner on time, after saying her prayers with the rest of them, and that night she went to her room in her spare time, and began to write. Mother Gregoria came to visit her, and asked if she had written any new stories. She felt as though they hadn't talked in a while. But she was pleased to see that Gabbie was looking well, and all the reports she'd had recently told her that Sister Bernadette was thriving. She could hardly wait for her to take her final vows. It wouldn't be for a long time, but she was well on her way. And when Mother Gregoria left her room, Gabbie felt the first serious stab of guilt she'd felt since the whole odyssey with Joe began after the Fourth of July. It had been only two weeks since then, but it was hard to believe, it seemed like a lifetime to her.

She couldn't help thinking about how disappointed Mother Gregoria would be in her, how devastated she would be. And yet Gabbie knew she couldn't stop now. All she wanted in her life was to be with Joe Connors.

She saw him in the confessional the next day, and they met in the abandoned office late in the afternoon, but it seemed so confining to them after the time they'd spent in Washington Square Park. And she had no hope of getting out and doing more errands for a while. In the end, it was a full two weeks before she could get out again, and waiting for the time to come almost drove them both mad.

As he had hoped they would, they met in Central Park. They walked around the model pond, and watched the children and adults playing with their boats, and then they walked slowly uptown. The park was lush and green, there was a steel band playing in the distance somewhere, and as it always did when she was with him, it felt like a dream to her, an entire holiday compressed into a single hour. They had so little time to be together, and all they wanted now was more. Of each other and their lives. Every moment they shared was precious to them. A few days later, they were able to go back to Central Park. They lay on the grass under a tree this time, and he put his head in her lap, as she stroked his hair and listened to him intently as they talked. There was so much to say, so little time in which to say it. And he bought her an ice cream again as they walked back to the car. They were seeing each other every day, hidden away in the confessional and the dusty office they felt was theirs, and they had only been out in the world together three times.

There was still so much to say, so many things to work out. Neither of them had any idea where to begin. It was a difficult journey to undertake, although they felt sure of each other. It had been done before, in circumstances similar to theirs. Priests usually left with nuns, he would not be the first, or the last. But they both knew what an explosion it would cause, how many people would feel betrayed. And there were times he was afraid for himself. Joe especially was worried about leaving the church, and had said as much to Gabbie, although he was certain that he loved her.

“We need more time,” Gabriella said sensibly. “You can't do something like that, Joe, without giving it a lot of thought.” And he had. He thought of it all the time, especially at night when he was alone, waiting to see her again, desperate for their stolen kisses in the confessional. He was doing something he could never have conceived of, until he met her.

She had begun writing a journal to him, about their love, and her dreams for them. She hoped to give it to him one day. It was a never-ending love letter to him, and she kept it concealed with her underwear in her only drawer, where she knew no one would find it. It was a way of being with him, even when she was not, and talking to him when she couldn't.

“When do you think you can get out again?” he asked, looking sad one afternoon, as he walked her back to the car.

“Whenever I can. Maybe next week.” The older nuns were all going away to Lake George. Someone had lent them a house there, and Mother Gregoria was going to join them for a few days to help them get settled. It might mean more freedom for Gabriella, or not, those things were always hard to judge in the convent.

But the day they left, Gabriella found herself with an entire afternoon at her disposal. The rest of the postulants had gone to the dentist that day, and they were planning to be out for several hours. Gabriella had been to the dentist only two months before, so they left her at home, with no obligations and no plans. She told the nun in charge that she was having a problem with some of her vegetables and needed some sprays. The old nun had had a bad headache for days, asked her no questions at all, and handed her the keys to the car without comment. Gabriella said vaguely that she'd be back in a while. She drove around the corner, as she always did, and called Joe, and luckily, he hadn't gone out. He hadn't expected to hear from her, but he hated leaving St. Stephens now, he was always afraid to miss one of her rare calls, and an opportunity to see her.

“How long do you have?” He always asked her that, but this time he was startled when she told him several hours. He had been waiting for this day, but he was stunned that it had come. They had been meeting this way for more than a month. “Meet me all the way east on Fifty-third Street.” He gave her an address, and she had no idea what it was. But it was only a few blocks away from her. She got there before him this time, and waited in the car, without her coif, anxiously awaiting his arrival.

He parked across the street from her, and put an arm around her as they walked slowly down the block. He seemed quiet and thoughtful.

“Don't you want to go to the park?” She seemed surprised.

“I thought it was a little too hot.” He turned to her then and looked down at her. He seemed concerned, as he took her in his arms. He knew that no one they knew would see them there, which was why he had suggested she come here. And he explained to her then what he'd done. He told her an old friend of his from St. Mark's had just moved to New York. He was in advertising and had done well, and he and Joe had had a long talk recently. Joe had told him that he was having serious qualms about his life, though he hadn't explained why. And his old friend had given him the keys to his apartment, and told Joe to use it anytime, just to get away from everything, and think and relax away from St. Stephen's. Joe knew his friend was out of town that week. He was staying with friends in Cape Cod for his summer vacation.

“Would you like to spend a little time in the apartment, just so we can be together for a while? I didn't know if you'd be afraid, or if you'd like to get off the streets for the time we have together.” He didn't want to pressure her, and he had no master plan. But he had brought the keys with him, and he was prepared to let her do whatever was comfortable for her. “It's up to you,” he said gently, and she smiled at him.

“I think it would be very nice,” she said quietly, and followed him inside. Joe had never been there before, and they were both impressed by what they saw. There was a large, comfortable living room with big leather chairs, and a long, brown leather couch. It was very modern, very male. There was a large, airy kitchen, and a big, handsome bar. And in the back, overlooking a small garden, were two bedrooms, one that was obviously his, and another he used as a guest room.

Joe put the air-conditioning on, and whistled admiringly at the stereo. He put on a selection of things he liked, after consulting her, and then helped himself to a glass of wine from the bar. It was a kind of time they'd never shared before, and Gabbie looked more than a little overwhelmed, as they sat down side by side on the couch. She was more nervous with him than she'd been before, but mostly because this was all so new to her. But as they listened to the music, and she took a small sip of his wine, she began to unwind. It was still Joe, the man she loved, even if the circumstances were different this time, and he asked her if she'd like to dance with him.