Elizabeth Chadwick - The Love Knot

'And you a midwife! Edith snorted. 'I know only as much as the next woman about child-bearing, but I can see that you're beyond the "might be" stage.

Catrin reddened beneath Edith's forthright stare. 'You are right. She shook her head. 'Fortunately it is much easier to conceal from men than it is from women. I am due to bear a child at Christmastide.

Edith's lips moved in silent calculation. 'Then you're almost four months along, she said, and then frowned. 'Do I understand from what you have just said that Oliver doesn't yet know?

'I don't intend telling him until I must. Catrin sat upright and squared her shoulders.

'Why ever not? 'His first wife died in childbirth after a prolonged labour. My anxiety for his well-being on campaign will be as nothing compared with his anxiety for me once he finds out.

Edith gave her a troubled look. 'But you cannot just leave it. Sooner or later he is bound to notice, and he will be wounded that you have not trusted him enough to tell him. Catrin gave her a wry and weary smile. 'Yes, but the real enemy is that neither one trusts the other to keep on living against the daily odds.

The water in the bath-tub was a scummy dark grey, but at least the man dozing in its heat was now flesh-coloured and the lank, grimy hair had turned wheat-blond. He smelled much more presentable too.

It was Oliver's hauberk that caused it, Catrin thought as she warmed towels on the spit bar near the hearth. The mail had to be greased to keep out the elements; the grease picked up minute filaments of steel and these blackened whatever the hauberk touched. For the past month, Oliver had been on campaign with Henry and that meant living in the garment. The padded gambeson worn under the hauberk to act as a cushion against both the chafing of the rivets and enemy sword blows could have stood up on its own. She had rammed a broomstick pole through the sleeves and hooked it up outside the shelter to try to air out the pungent stink of sweat and smoke, but with little hope of success.

At least her stomach was not quite so swift to turn these days and there had only been a couple of mild nausea pangs as she dealt with the gambeson. She was almost into her fifth month of pregnancy. While carrying Rosamund, her belly had been scarcely noticeable until well into the seventh month, but this time she was showing much earlier. Oliver could not help but notice once the time came to undress for bed. He had been absent for four weeks; now the reckoning was at hand. But first she would let him rest.

She knew that she did not have him for long. Henry was being harried hither and yon throughout the West Country by Eustace and although the young prince always kept one step ahead of his enemy, and even managed to make some small gains, he was effectively pinned down and suffering. Oliver's arrival in Bristol was only to muster supplies for the garrisons at Marlborough and Devizes. The latter was Henry's base for the nonce. Catrin would have been there herself had it not been for Edon insisting that she stay for her lying-in. It was more obligation than willingness which caused Catrin to agree, but she would not have dreamed of refusing.

In the meantime, she did her best to control her fears for Oliver by keeping herself occupied. The bower was now very well supplied with unguents for plumping and softening the skin. There was enough cough syrup to cure an epidemic and so much staves-acre salve that no one in the keep had any excuse for being lousy.

Oliver slept on in the tub, his breathing becoming slow and deep. Catrin hated to wake him, but knew if she did not he would lie there until the water was stone cold. Taking a towel from the spit bar, she went to the tub and gently touched his shoulder.

He awoke with a jerk and a gasp of breath. Then his eyes slowly cleared from the smokiness of sleep and he reached for the towel. 'I don't know what a bed feels like any more, he said. 'The times we are not running from Eustace, we are running to targets of our own, and when we do manage to sleep, it isn't for long. Henry thinks that sleep is a waste of time. He doesn't even sit down to eat but prowls round the hall with his food in his hand attending to business.

'I thought you admired him for his energy, Catrin murmured.

'I do. But sometimes I wish it was from a distance. He stepped from the tub and glanced in distaste at the colour of the water.

'You're at a distance now.

'For a day and a night.

Taking the towel from him, she patted the droplets from his back, then lightly ran her fingertips over his skin. She was relieved to see that dirt and exhaustion were the only consequences of Prince Henry's regime. There were no new wounds over which to trouble. 'I've missed you, she said.

'Dear God, that's the worst of it, being parted. Turning, he caught her in his arms and kissed her. 'I was tired of fighting before, but now I am sick to the back teeth.

Catrin kissed him back, her fingers in his sleek, damp hair. 'I am sick of it too, she said, adding only half in jest; 'we could run away and open an alehouse like Godard and Edith.

'Don't tempt me.

They kissed again. His arm circled her waist and Catrin had to make a deliberate effort not to draw away. It was her guilt that made her think he would immediately detect her growing belly. 'As soon as Edon is delivered of her child, I will come to you at Devizes, she said . . Under proper escort of course. And do not say that Devizes is no place for a woman because I will not listen.

Oliver laughed ruefully. 'Do you remember when I first brought you to Bristol? You clung to my belt and stared around with frightened eyes? Now you think nothing of walking straight into the lion's mouth.

'I have learned there are fates far worse. She rubbed her face against his damp shoulder. Beneath her lips she felt the hard protrusion where the broken bone had healed. 'Listen, there is something I have to…

With equal feelings of relief and disappointment, she stopped speaking as Rosamund skipped through the door. The little girl was carrying the flask of wine that Catrin had asked her to fetch. Rosamund pulled a face at the colour of the bath water and, having handed over the wine, sat down on the bed to play with her straw doll, cradling it like a baby.

'You were saying? Oliver broke away to finish drying himself.

Catrin. shook her head. 'I'll tell you later.

Oliver glanced at the child and his lips twitched. 'Oh, he said. 'Hardened gossip not fit for big ears.

'My ears aren't big, Rosamund piped up immediately, her eyes flashing with indignation.

Oliver leaned over and lightly pinched one between his forefinger and thumb. 'They are when it comes to listening!

If Prince Henry had you among his troops, we'd know when Stephen was blowing his nose up in York!

'You wouldn't. It's not true. Mama, tell him!

Laughing despite herself, Catrin intervened. 'Your papa means that you sit very quietly and listen very hard. That's a good thing to do, but sometimes people have things to say to each other that are private.

Rosamund nodded, a serious frown between her eyes. She was a well-behaved child, easy to reason with but, by the same code, always needing a reason when sometimes there wasn't one. 'What's hardened gossip? she asked.

Oliver choked and busied himself putting on his clothes.

'Something that grown people talk about when they shouldn't, Catrin said, her face suffusing. 'And your papa is wrong. It's not gossip that I want to discuss with him.

Oliver looked at her. Catrin gave him a tight smile and a little shake of her head.

To his credit, he did not pursue the matter but finished dressing and swung Rosamund up in his arms. 'Do you want to go into the town and see the market? Perhaps find some ribbons for your hair and a new brooch for your mother?

Rosamund squealed with delight. Catrin smiled with pleasure, although there was a certain reserve in her expression. 'Do you not want to rest awhile? You fell sound asleep in the tub.

Oliver sighed. 'There is nothing I would like better, but I do not have the time. I'm not going into the town just for the purgatory of escorting my womenfolk around the stalls. There are things I have to do for Henry; people to see, supplies to secure. Don't worry, I'll rest well tonight.

With the news she had to give him, Catrin was not so sure of that, but she nodded and fetched her cloak.

The market place was heaving with people. As usual, the eel woman was crying her wares and, because it had become a kind of homecoming tradition, Oliver and Catrin bought a dozen while Rosamund looked on and pulled faces. Oliver went off to conduct his business leaving Catrin and Rosamund to browse among the stalls. Catrin bought some new needles and two wimple pins. For Rosamund there were some scarlet silk hair ribbons and a delicate little belt of silk braid woven with a traditional lozenge pattern. The sun beat down, but there was a fresh breeze off the river and everyone was in high good spirits. Rosamund danced from booth to booth with the eagle eye and indefatigable energy of a born bargain hunter. Catrin made a mental note to seek a man with a bottomless purse when the time came to find a mate for her daughter.

Oliver returned from his own excursion and bought Catrin a new cloak brooch of intricate Irish silver work, strong, but still delicate enough to be worn on a winter dress as well as a cloak. With much fluttering of her eyelashes, Rosamund managed to cozen a string of polished wooden beads out of him.

'I'm glad I won't be a languishing young man when you reach womanhood! he said ruefully. 'You'd empty my pouch and cut my heartstrings in very short order!

Rosamund gave him one of her grave, puzzled looks, but Catrin laughed and took his arm. 'I know exactly what you mean.

The three of them wandered among the booths until they came to a cook stall that Ethel had always favoured. Here they bought spicy lamb pasties and little cakes made with honey and figs. To wash it down there was cider bought from a nearby stall and buttermilk for Rosamund.

Catrin was licking the last sticky crumbs from her fingers and sighing with satisfaction at the pleasure of the day thus far, when Geoffrey came thrusting through the crowd, his expression agitated.

'Found you at last, he panted. 'Edon's in travail and calling for you. You must come quickly. The women say she's in much pain. There's a midwife with her, but it's you she wants.

Catrin wiped her hands together and nodded. The idyll was at an end sooner than she had thought. She could not refuse Geoffrey. Indeed, he looked as much in need of a soothing tisane as his wife.

'Go, Oliver said. 'I'll bring Rosamund home.

Catrin kissed him, stooped to hug Rosamund and then hurried away with Geoffrey.

Rosamund gazed up at Oliver, her top lip beaded with cake crumbs. 'Can we go and look at the stalls over there? she asked, pointing to the spice booths. 'Mama always lets me smell the things when we come to the market.

Thankful that she had not asked him what 'travail' meant or why Edon was in pain, Oliver let her lead him like a lamb to the slaughter.

Catrin arrived at Edon's bedside to find her being comforted by two of Mabile's women while the midwife gently examined her.

'Edon, I'm here, Catrin panted, out of breath from her dash. The women stood aside and Catrin stooped to take her friend's imploring outstretched hand. The fingers gripped with talon intensity. Edon's face was contorted with pain. She lay on a bed of birthing straw, her blond hair lank and wet, her belly a taut, distended mound.

The midwife already in attendance, Dame Sibell, was a thin, good-natured woman in early middle age with competent hands and humorous green eyes. Just now they were devoid of all sparkle. 'The afterbirth wants to come before the babe, she said, wiping blood and oil from her hands.

Her gaze met Catrin's and she gave an infinitesimal shake of the head. When an afterbirth came first, the chances for mother and child were poor, and there was nothing that even the most skilled midwife could do.

'Send for the priest, Catrin mouthed silently.

Dame Sibell signalled that it had already been done.

Catrin smoothed Edon's brow. Beneath her fingers the other woman's skin was clammy and grey.

'I'm glad you're here, Edon whispered, trying to smile. 'I'll be all right now.