Джорджетт Хейер - The Masqueraders

“We have suffered, child,” said Miss Merriot.

“Then, ma’am, you will feel for me. My papa puts a hateful disagreeable woman to be my duenna, and I am so guarded and sheltered that there is nothing amusing ever happens to me, in spite of having been brought to town. Add to all that, ma’am, Sir Anthony Fanshawe, and you will see why I had come to the pitch of doing anything only to get away!”

“I feel we are to deplore Sir Anthony, Kate,” said Mr Merriot.

“It is not that I am not fond of him,” Letty explained. “I have always been fond of him, but conceive, ma’am, being required to marry a man whom you have known all your life! A man, too, of his years and disposition!”

“I perceive in you a victim of parental tyranny, child,” said Miss Merriot. “We consign Sir Anthony to perdition.”

Letty giggled at that. “Oh, never, ma’am! ’Tis a model of prudence and the virtues! And thirty-five years old at the very least!”

Mr Merriot flicked a speck of snuff from his sleeve.

“And to escape this greybeard, hence the young Adonis yonder, I suppose?”

Miss Letty hung her head. “He — he was not very young either, I suppose,” she confessed. “And I have been very silly, and wicked, I know. But indeed I thought him vastly more entertaining than Tony. You could not for your life imagine Tony excited, or in a scrape, or even hurried. And Gregory said such pretty things, and it was all so romantic I was misled.”

“The matter’s plain to the meanest intelligence, madam,” Mr Merriot assured her, “I discover in myself a growing desire to meet the phlegmatic Sir Anthony.”

His sister laughed. “Ay, that’s to your taste. But what’s the next step?”

“Oh, she goes with us along to London. Pray, ma’am, may we know your name?”

“’Tis Letitia Grayson, sir. My papa is Sir Humphrey Grayson of Grayson Court, in Gloucestershire. He is afflicted with the gout. I expect you may see him by and by, for I left a note for him, and he would be bound to find it.”

“We await his coming, then,” said Miss Merriot. “It solves the matter. My Peter, bespeak a bedchamber for Miss Grayson.”

A confiding hand was slipped into Kate’s as Mr Merriot strolled away to the door. “Please will you call me Letty?” said Miss Grayson shyly.

Mr Merriot made an odd grimace at the panel of the door, and went through into the taproom.

Mine host had barely recovered from his very natural bewilderment at finding that the supposed fugitive was still in his house when there came the sound of a chaise bowling at a rare speed along the road. It drew up at the inn, and in the light of the lamps Mr Merriot saw his servant jump down. He pursed his lips in a soundless whistle. “This should be papa,” he said pensively. “Your fourth room will be wanted, host.” He went back into the coffee-room to find that Miss Letty was at the window already, peering out.

“Your papa, as I believe,” announced Mr Merriot.

“I am afraid it is,” agreed Miss Letty. “Yet with the gout plaguing him so much — oh lud! As I live, ’tis Anthony!”

Miss Merriot threw her brother a comical look. “And so your desires are fulfilled, child. We are all impatience, Letty.”

Mr Merriot stood by her chair, and took snuff. The door opened to admit a large gentleman, who came in very leisurely.

“Lud, it’s a mammoth!” said Miss Merriot, for her brother’s private ear.

“Oh, are you jealous?” he retorted.

The large gentleman paused on the threshold and put up his quizzing-glass, through which he blandly surveyed the room. He was a very large gentleman indeed, with magnificent shoulders and a fine leg. He seemed rather to fill the room; he had certainly a presence, and a personality. He wore a tie wig of plain brown, and carried his hat under his arm. The hilt of his sword peeped out from between the folds of his greatcoat, but in his hand he held a cane.

“The gentleman would appear to be annoyed,” murmured Mr Merriot, looking at the lines about the newcomer’s mouth and square jowl.

“La, my dear, how can you say so?” marveled Miss Merriot, seeing the large gentleman’s grey eyes calm and bored. She rose with an air, and swept a curtsey. The gentleman must not be allowed to dominate the room thus. It seemed he had the way of it. “Make your leg, child,” she threw over her shoulder at Peter. “We are under observation.”

The sternness about Sir Anthony’s mouth vanished. He smiled and showed a row of very even white teeth. He bowed with easy grace. “Madam, your most obedient! Sir, yours!”

Mr Merriot took Miss Letty by the hand. “Permit me to restore to you Miss Grayson, sir,” he said, ignoring an indignant protest from the lady.

Sir Anthony showed no desire to receive Miss Grayson, who looked him defiantly between the eyes. He smiled still, but he did not offer to take her hand. “You should be whipped, Letty,” he said pleasantly.

Miss Grayson flushed. “’Deed, sir, and did you bring your cane for that purpose?” she demanded.

“No, my dear, but I should be happy to benefit you that far.”

Peter Merriot was amused, and permitted his chuckle to be heard. “Faith, it’s a stern suitor.”

“You are — very rude — and — and — and hateful!” declared Miss Grayson, outraged.

Sir Anthony laid down his cane and his hat, and began to take off his greatcoat. As one who had no further interest in Miss Grayson he took out his snuff-box, unfobbed it, and held it out to Mr Merriot. His hand was very white and finely shaped, but it looked to have some strength. “Sir,” said he, smiling sleepily for all his grey eyes were alert beneath their rather heavy lids, “you will permit me to thank you on behalf of my friend, Sir Humphrey Grayson, for your services to his daughter.”

Mr Merriot helped himself to a pinch of snuff. Grey eyes met grey; the humorous look played around Mr Merriot’s mouth. “Lud, here’s a solemnity!” he said. “I am Miss Grayson’s servant to command.”

Miss Grayson forgot her dignity. “Tony, ’twas wonderful! His sword was out in a trice, and I thought he was about to run that odious Markham right through the body, but just as it was too monstrously exciting for words the point seemed to flash upwards and the hilt caught Markham on the chin.” She demonstrated with a small fist to her own pretty chin. “He went down like a stone,” she ended dramatically. Her glance fell on Miss Merriot by the fire. “And Miss Merriot too was splendid, Tony, for she pretended to swoon in Markham’s arms.”

Mr Merriot looked down at his sister something quizzically. “My dear, I eclipse you,” he murmured. He turned again to Sir Anthony. “Thus we mourn our departed suitor. Now where did you find my man John?” He began to pour wine, and handed one glass to the large gentleman.

“At Stilton,” Sir Anthony replied. “Just before I saw my friend Mr Markham. He was endeavoring to hide a chaise and horses which — er — aroused my suspicions. He was induced to confide in me.”

Mr Merriot looked meditatively at that square handsome face. “I wonder why?” he said, for he knew his John.

A singularly attractive smile crossed Sir Anthony’s face. “My charm of manner, sir, I believe,” he said.

There came a laugh from Miss Merriot. “I begin to have a kindness for the large gentleman,” she remarked to the room at large. “And you met the so dear Mr Markham, sir?”

“Hardly, madam. I had rather say I saw the so dear Mr Markham pass me in a cloud of — mud, I believe.”

“I wonder, did he see you?” Miss Merriot’s eyes were bright with laughter.

“I am almost persuaded that he did,” said Sir Anthony.

“Then I take it we are not to expect his return?” Miss Merriot cocked a knowing eyebrow.

“I hardly think so, madam,” said Sir Anthony placidly.

Miss Merriot looked at Miss Grayson. “Why, child, I like the large gentleman, I protest,” she said. “Pray, sir, have you dined?”

“So far I have not had the time, madam, but I have reason to hope the landlord is preparing dinner for me at this moment.”

Mine host himself came in most opportunely then, with the serving maid behind him, carrying a loaded tray. A fresh cover was laid, a roasted chicken placed before Sir Anthony, and a fresh bottle uncorked.

“You permit, madam?” Sir Anthony bowed towards Miss Merriot.

“Pray, sir, be seated. You will be ravenous.”

“I confess I hate to miss my dinner,” said Sir Anthony, and began to carve the chicken. “There is something of me to maintain, you see,” he added, with a twinkle, and a glance cast down his noble bulk.

Miss Grayson cut in on Miss Merriot’s laugh. “Food!” she ejaculated scornfully, and tapped an impatient foot. Sir Anthony paid no heed. “Well, Tony, you are come nigh on a hundred miles to rescue me, as I suppose, and now have you nothing at all to say but that you have missed your dinner?”

“That thought has been absorbing me for the last twenty miles,” said Sir Anthony imperturbably.

“And me in peril!” cried the affronted Miss Grayson.

Sir Anthony raised his eyes from the chicken and looked coolly across at her. “Oh, were you in peril?” he inquired. “I came merely to put an end to an indiscretion, as I thought.”

“Peril! At the hands of such a Monster!” Miss Grayson was indignant. “I wonder, sir, that you need ask.”

Sir Anthony poured wine for himself and Mr Merriot. “My dear Letty,” said he, “you have so frequently assured us that Mr Markham is a model of all the virtues that I did you the honour to respect your judgment.”

Miss Grayson turned scarlet, and looked as though she were about to cry. “You didn’t, Tony! You are just being — disagreeable. And he’s not a model of virtue! He is an odious brute, and — and so are you!”

“Tut, child, the gentleman’s hungry, and will be the better for his chicken,” said Mr Merriot.

“I am not a child!” flashed Miss Grayson, and was off in a swirl of skirts to Miss Merriot’s side. From the shelter of Miss Merriot’s arm she hurled a tearful defiance. “And I would sooner go to Gretna with that Monster than marry you, Sir Tony!”

Sir Anthony remained unmoved. “My dear Letty, if this piece of absurdity was to escape my attentions, believe me it was not in the least necessary. So far as I am aware I have never asked you to marry me. Nor have I the smallest intention of so doing.”

This pronouncement brought Miss Grayson’s head up from Kate’s shoulder. In round-eyed astonishment she gazed at Sir Anthony, busily engaged with the wing of a chicken.

“I have to suppose,” said Miss Merriot sharply, “that the gentleman is an original.”

Mr Merriot turned away to hide a laughing face. “These family arrangements — !” he said.

“But — but Papa says — ” began Miss Grayson. “Why, Tony, don’t you want to marry me?”

“I do not,” said Sir Anthony.

Miss Grayson blinked, but she did not seem to be offended. “Why don’t you?” she asked with naive curiosity.

At that Sir Anthony looked up, and there was a twinkle in his eyes. “I suppose, Letty, because my taste is at fault.”

“Well!” Miss Grayson digested this in silence. She disengaged herself from Kate’s arm, and went slowly to the table. Sir Anthony rose at her approach, and received one little hand in his large one. “Tony, will you tell Papa?” she asked.

“I have told him, my dear.”

“How did he take it?” asked Miss Grayson anxiously.

“Philosophically, child.”

“I am so glad!” said Miss Grayson, with a relieved sigh. “If you don’t want to marry me, Tony, I can go home with a quiet mind. And I can even forgive you for being so disagreeable.”

“And I,” said Sir Anthony, “can finish my dinner.”

Miss Merriot called “Come in!” to a scratching on the door. Came Mr Merriot into the big bedroom, and walked across to the fireplace where Kate stood. Mr Merriot cocked an eyebrow at Kate, and said — “Well, my dear, and did you kiss her good-night?”

Miss Merriot kicked off her shoes, and replied in kind. “What, are you parted from the large gentleman already?”

Mr Merriot looked into the fire, and a slow smile came, and the suspicion of a blush.

“Lord, child!” said Miss Merriot. “Are you for the mammoth? It’s a most respectable gentleman, my dear.”

Mr Merriot raised his eyes. “I believe I would not choose to cross him,” he remarked inconsequently. “But I would trust him.”

Miss Merriot began to laugh. “Be a man, my Peter, I implore you.”