“What an impatient child she is,” said my mother frowning. “You do not wait to hear. Now when the crowd shouts, ‘God save the Lady Elizabeth,’ the voice says, ‘So be it.’ ”

“Who is it then?” asked Honey.

“That is the mystery. There is no one in the house. Yet the voice comes.”

“There must be someone,” I said.

“There is no one. The house is empty. And when the crowds shout, ‘What is the Mass?’ the voice answers, ‘Idolatry.’ ”

Catherine had flushed scarlet. “It is some wicked person who is tricking people.”

“It’s a voice,” said my mother, “and no one there. A voice without a body. Is that not a marvelous thing?”

“If it talked sense it would be,” said Catherine.

“Sense! Who is to question the divine word?”

“I do,” said Catherine. “It is only divine for Protestants. To the people of the true faith it is…heresy.”

“Be silent, Cat,” I said. “You are disrespectful to your grandmother.”

“Is it disrespectful then to tell the truth?”

“Truth to one perhaps is not truth to another.”

“How can that be? The truth must always stand.”

I said wearily: “I will not have these conflicts in the house. Is it not bad enough that they persist in the country?”

Catherine persisted: “I must say what I feel.”

“You must learn to curb your tongue and show a proper respect where it is due.”

“Respect!” said Catherine. “My father would say….”

I said: “I will have no more of this.”

Catherine flung out of the room. “It is a pretty pass,” she muttered, “when one must pretend to agree with wicked lies…just to please people.”

“My word,” said my mother, “there goes a fierce little Papist.”

I noticed that Honey was smiling, as she always did when there was a difference between myself and Catherine.

With such frictions in the family, I wondered how one could hope for harmony in the world.

Catherine was triumphant when an investigation of the house revealed a young woman, named Elizabeth Croft, who had been secreted into a hole in the wall that she might answer the questions which were put to her and incite the people against the Queen and her Spanish marriage.

“There is your voice,” cried Catherine and hurried over to Caseman Court to tell my mother.

“She was so discountenanced, I couldn’t help laughing,” she told me when she came back.

“You should have had more compassion,” I told her.

“Compassion on such a bigot!”

“And you, my dear, do you perhaps suffer from the same complaint?”

“But I am in favor of the true religion.”

“As I said, a bigot, Catherine. I do not wish you to become involved in these matters.”

“I talk of them with my father…now.” Her eyes were shining. “It is wonderful to have discovered him. All these years I have been at fault.”

“He took no notice of you.”

“Of course he did not when I was young and stupid. It is different now.”

“I do beg of you to be careful.”

She flew at me and hugged me. “Dearest Mother, you must know that I am grown up…almost.”

“But not quite,” I reminded her.

Peter came in to tell us that Elizabeth Croft was in the pillory for playing her part in the hoax.

“Poor girl,” I said. “I hope she does not pay for this with her head.”

I thought then: A common price to be asked. And when I considered the religious conflict which seemed to have intensified rather than to have diminished now that we had a firmly Catholic Queen I continued in my apprehension and promised myself that if it must be there in the outside world it should be curbed in the family.

That July Prince Philip of Spain landed in England and the Queen traveled to Winchester where they were married.

We saw their entry to the capital. They crossed London Bridge on horseback and I was struck by the wan look of the Queen and the pathetically adoring manner which she displayed toward her pale-faced, thin-lipped bridegroom. She was nearly ten years older than he and I felt sorry for her.

The marriage was very unpopular but when the people saw the treasure which Philip had brought with him they cheered. Ninety-nine chests were needed to carry it and these chests were filled with gold and silver bullion. This accompanied the royal couple on their journey to the Tower and at least that met with the people’s approval. It was more loudly cheered than the bride and groom, but even in spite of this there were murmurings in the crowd.

Now we indeed saw the changes in the land. Under the Queen’s father life had been dangerous. He had been a tyrant who had been wont to demand a man’s head should he give offense; yet in that King’s day life had seemed colorful. There had been constant drama at Court where the King had changed his wives frequently; this Queen remained constant to her husband; she doted on him; but the solemnity of Spain had already taken possession of the Court.

There was something else. The laws of Spain were being brought into the country. We heard a great talk about the true church which was the Holy Church of Rome and the word “heretic” was constantly used.

And then the fires of Smithfield began to burn.

Often from the gardens we would see the pall of smoke, and when the wind blew westward would smell it; we would shiver and fancy we heard the shrieks of the dying.

The Queen had been given a new name. It was Bloody Mary.

It was on a cold February day in the year 1555 when they took Simon Caseman.

The first I heard was when Peter and Paul came running over to the Abbey. At first I could not understand what had happened. They were incoherent.

“They came…they looked everywhere….”

“They have taken books away with them….”

“They tied up their barge by the privy steps….”

I said, “Peter, Paul, tell me from the beginning. What is this?”

I think I guessed very quickly. After all it was not uncommon. And I had long known that Simon Caseman was flirting with the new faith.

Paul started to cry suddenly. “They have taken our father,” he said.

“Where is your mother?”

“She is just sitting there…staring. She doesn’t speak. Come quickly, Damask. Please come with us.”

I hurried over to the house. I went into the hall where the table was set for a meal and I thought: It was to this hall they came to take my father…. Simon Caseman brought them to take him…and now they have come for Simon Caseman.

My mother was seated at the table. She looked as though she were dazed. I knelt beside her and took her cold hand in mine.

“Mother,” I said, “I am here.”

She spoke then. “Is it Damask? My girl Damask?”

“Yes, Mother, I am here.”

“They came and took him,” she said.

“Yes, I know.”

“Why should they take him? Why—”

“Perhaps he will come back,” I said, knowing full well that he would not. Had not the twins said they had found books and taken them away? He was doomed as a heretic.

“Mother,” I said, “you should lie down. I will get you one of your potions. If you could sleep a little…perhaps when you awoke….”

“He will come back?”

“Perhaps he will. Perhaps they have taken him for questioning.”

She clutched at my arm.

“That’s it,” she said. “They’ve taken him to question him on some matter. He will come back. He is a good man, Damask.”

“Mother,” I said, “let me help you to your bed.”

The twins watched me as though I were possessed of some power to soothe her. How I wished I had been! For the first time in my life I should have been happy then to see Simon Caseman walk in.

“What harm had he done?” she demanded.

“Let us hope he will soon be back to tell you all about it.”

She allowed me to help her to bed and I sent for that soothing draft; and I thought: Twice in her life a husband has been taken from her; and twice in the name of religion.

When she was sleeping I returned to the Abbey. I met Bruno as I came into the hall.

I said: “I have come from my mother. She is distracted with grief.”

“So they have taken him,” he said; and a smile played about his lips.

“You know!” I cried.

He nodded, smiling secretly.

I cried out: “You…arranged it. You informed against him.”

“He is a heretic,” he replied.

“He is my mother’s husband.”

“Have you forgotten that one night he would have done the same to me?”

“It is revenge then,” I said.

“It is justice.”

“Oh, God!” I cried. “It will be Smithfield for him.”

“The heretic’s reward.”

I covered my face with my hands because I could not bear to go on looking into Bruno’s. “So much grief for your father’s murderer!” I turned and ran to my room.

The girls came to me.

“Mother, is it true then?” cried Catherine, her face working with emotion. “They have taken him. What will they do to him? What are they doing now?”

“He will die,” said Honey. “He will die at the stake.”

Catherine’s face puckered. “They can’t do it, can they? They can’t…to him! He is your stepfather.”

“That fact will not deter them,” I said sadly.

Catherine cried: “And they will burn him to death simply be cause he believes God should be worshiped in a certain way? I know he is a heretic and heretics are wicked, but to burn him”

“To death,” said Honey somberly.

They were too young to know of such horrors. I said: “It may be that it will not happen. I am going to bring the twins over here. You will be very kind to them. You will remember that it is their father….”

They nodded.

Then I went back to my old home to look after my mother.

I sat with her and we tried to talk of other things: of her garden, of her stillroom. But all the time her ears were alert for the sound of a barge at the privy stairs, for the voice which I knew she would never hear again.

It was no use. We must talk of him, because it was of him that she was thinking. She told me how good he had always been to her; how happy had been her years with him.

“He was the perfect husband,” she told me; and I thought of that good man, my father, and asked myself if she had mourned him like this, although I knew the answer to that.

“He was so clever,” she said. “He wanted to know what people were writing…what people were thinking.”

Ah, poor Simon Caseman, he should have known that one must not display interest even where our rulers had decided that we should not.

“They should have kept Queen Jane on the throne. This wouldn’t have happened then.”

No, Mother, I thought, not to you. But to others. Perhaps to Bruno.

Then I remembered that it was Bruno who had brought this about. He had done to Simon Caseman what Simon had tried to do to him.

I thought: I shall remember it forever. I had loathed the man but it sickened me to think that he had been betrayed by my husband.

The day had come. My mother wanted to go to Hampton Court, there to see the Queen and beg her to pardon her husband.

He was a heretic, proved to be a heretic, and so I heard would not diverge from his opinions. A strange man—so much that was evil in him and yet my mother thought him the perfect husband and he remained true to his belief in face of death.

I quieted my mother that day with her poppy juice and she slept.

I went out into the garden and looked toward the city. A pall of smoke was drifting down the river. The Smithfield fires were burning.

Then I went in and sat by my mother’s bed that I might be there to comfort her when she awakened.

Death of a Witch

A YEAR HAD PASSED since Simon Caseman suffered the heretic’s death. My mother seemed to have aged ten years. Caseman Court had been returned to its rightful owner—myself—for as the wife of a good Catholic who had defied the reign of heretics and in some measure reformed the old Abbey, I was in high favor.

I did not tell my mother that the house had been returned to me. Her grief was too great for her to be concerned with such matters. She went on living there. It was a sad and sorry household.

Rupert was often there; he had offered to help with the estate and this he had done. I saw him frequently and his gentleness to my mother moved me deeply.