“So it’s going to happen tonight,” Hazel said as she put on the tight shirt she always wore to work. It showed a lot more cleavage than she was comfortable with, but she got better tips that way. I didn’t hate the player, I hated the game in that instance.
“What’s going to happen?” I already knew the answer.
“I am going to find a nice young man to pop that cherry of yours.” She jabbed her fork at me and I backed up so she didn’t stab me with it. There it was again. The reminder that I was a card-carrying member of the Virginity Club. I wish I had some good reason, that I was like, saving myself for Jesus, or my parents had put the fear in me, or told me that if I had sex with a boy that my ears would fall off and I’d gain forty pounds, but I had no such excuse.
The truth was, boys were gross. Part of me was still semi-convinced they had cooties. I’d sort of dated, but every time I thought about getting physical, or close to a guy, he smelled weird, or had hair on his knuckles, or burped or did something else to completely turn me off.
I’d been on a few dates here and there, but usually I’d have to send out an emergency call to one of my friends. Sooner or later, rumors went around my high school that I was a lesbian, and I went ahead and let them spread. Of course, then girls started hitting on me, but they were easier to fend off.
I thought that in college, I would have the chance to maybe meet someone. Someone who wore a tie every day and expensive cologne and had a 401K. Yum. But, here I was, well into my junior year and that fellow hadn’t shown up yet. Sure, there were plenty of guys on campus, but a lot of them were taken. Or gay. Or taken and gay. Or total and complete douchebags. Or budding alcoholics. Or gay, taken douchebag alcoholics.
Since my friends had always struck out when it came to setting me up with a boy in order to make him my boyfriend, they’d lowered their expectations to just getting me laid. I didn’t exactly advertise my virginity, but it always seemed to come up when people were drinking and swapping stories and I got red-faced and ran away to the bathroom when everyone started talking about their first times.
“How many times have I told you, I’m set. It will happen when it’s supposed to happen.”
“Don’t give me that fairy godmother, dreams come true shit. We don’t need to find your prince charming. Just a non-skeezy guy to do you a service. Think of him as… a plumber. For your vagina.” She scraped the bottom of the container for the last few croutons.
“A plumber? Have you ever seen a sexy plumber? Outside of a porno?” One of the other things my friends had done to try and make me want to have sex was make me watch it. I’d only lasted about five minutes when I had to run away and beg them to shut it off. Seeing other people… doing things like that? I didn’t understand how anyone could find that sexy. Plus, the girls were like, unbelievably flexible. No way I could contort myself like that.
I’d been branded as a prude from then on.
“Why are you so hung up about it? I know you have a little battery friend.”
“Yeah, so? Just because I’m a virgin, I’m supposed to not know about my own body?” Hazel had also surprised me a time or two when I thought I was alone. “I have a sex drive, Haze. Being a virgin doesn’t stop me from having sexual feelings.”
In fact, I probably had more than the average girl, just because they were so… pent up.
“We just need to take those sexual feelings and transfer them to something with a penis. A real life penis. With a boy attached to it.”
I shook my head and went to take a shower.
About the author:
Chelsea M. Cameron is a YA/NA New York Times/USA Today Best Selling author from Maine. Lover of things random and ridiculous, Jane Austen/Charlotte and Emily Bronte Fangirl, red velvet cake enthusiast, obsessive tea drinker, vegetarian, former cheerleader and world's worst video gamer. When not writing, she enjoys watching infomercials, singing in the car and tweeting. She has a degree in journalism from the University of Maine, Orono that she promptly abandoned to write about the people in her own head. More often than not, these people turn out to be just as weird as she is.
Praise for The Only One
It's full on panty throwing, puddle of goo, fetal position rocking action kinda love for that boy!- Ava at Book Nerds Anonymous
Readers will swoon over John Boy. His protectiveness mixed with his unbridled passion for the heroine left em fanning myself page after page -Christine Lee, author of All of You
The Only One will keep you up all night! - Brenda Rothert, author of Stripped and the Now series.
The Only One is a powerful and addictive story that had me laughing, crying, and squealing like a teenage girl! - Amy at The Reading Realm
Vernon takes a serious topic and gives everyone affected compassion and love from unexpected places. - Lisa at A Life Bound By Books
Other Books by Magan Vernon
How to Date an Alien (My Alien Romance Series #1)
How to Break up with an Alien (My Alien Romance Series #2)
How to Marry an Alien (My Alien Romance #3)
My Paper Heart
Life, Love, & Lemons
The Only Exception
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