“I love you, Zane.”

“I love you too, bro.” He stood up and gave me a big bear hug before pulling back. “And now, if you’ll excuse me. I want to go and find Lucky and tell her everything.” He laughed as he shook his head. “I can’t believe that I’ve become that guy.”

I laughed as well and agreed with him. “I can’t believe it either.”

Chapter 10

“I want to go to Aruba.” She sat at the table and looked up at me with a demanding face.

“I can’t leave Palm Bonita,” I sighed, irritated that we were having this conversation again.

“I want to go on vacation. This shit is boring.” She looked at me, annoyed. “No one in Aruba is going to know or care who you are.”

“I’m sorry, but I can’t go.”

“What use are you to me?”

“I thought you liked my company.” I turned away from her, unable to look at her. I wasn’t sure who she was becoming, or maybe I just hadn’t known who she really was when we first started dating.

“Noah, it’s not that I don’t like your company. It’s that I’ll like it more if we went to Aruba.” She continued painting her fingernails and held them up to me. “What do you think?” I stared at the bright red polish on her nails and thought the color was apt. Her fingers looked like they had been dipped in blood and really, that was the way I was starting to think of her. She was a bloodsucker, only interested in her own needs. The fact was I would have already dumped her if there weren’t other issues to consider, other circumstances that made it more difficult. It was hard for me to walk away from her when I knew that I was possibly putting someone else at risk.

“Looks good.” I faked a smile and turned away. “If you’re wanting to be a prostitute or vampire.” I said under my breath.

“What’s that?” Her voice was shrill, and I looked over at her with a blank expression.

“What’s what?”

“What did you just say?” Her eyes narrowed at me coldly and I almost shivered as I stared at her. There was no happiness or joy in her spirit. She looked broken. Broken and distant.

“Nothing, just that I wished I could take you to Aruba.”

“Whatever.” She flung her hair over her shoulders. “I’ll figure out a way myself or with the help of someone else.”

“What do you mean?” I frowned. “You’re not going to steal again?”

“You act like that’s a bad thing.” She stood up and walked over to me. “You act like you didn’t get off fucking me in that stranger’s house after we stole the handbag.”

“We didn’t steal anything.” I took a step away from her, feeling my body temperature rising. It was getting harder and harder for me to disguise my feelings.

“No one would believe that you weren’t in it with me. Were you not in the house with me?” She laughed cattily, and ran her index finger all the way down my chest and to my crotch, which sat motionless. She looked up at me with a pout. “There was a day when all I had to do was touch you and you would rise to attention.”

“I’m not in the mood.” I looked away from her.

“Do you not find me attractive anymore?” Her tone changed to one of pity and hurt, and I looked over at her. She looked distraught, but I wasn’t sure if it was because she was genuinely sad that I was pulling away from her or just because her feminine wiles won’t working.

“You’re beautiful.” I stared at her and answered honestly.

“I don’t mean to be like this, you know.” Her eyes were open and held a touch of bleakness. “I’ve just been through so much in my life. Every day I’m just in survival mode. I’m just trying to get by. I just want to be free.” Tears slid from her eyes. “I just want to get out of here and be free.”

“I know you do.” I held her hand and squeezed it compassionately, and for one moment we were once again united in our grief.

“I hope that today hasn’t been filled with too many bombshells,” I grimaced as I got into the car with Robin. “I bet you’re wishing that you didn’t come over to the Johnsons’ today.”

“Not at all,” she laughed. “Though it has been one of those Days of Our Lives types of day.”

“That’s a lot of family information for you to get at one time.” I couldn’t stop myself from laughing as we pulled out of the Johnsons’ driveway. “I wouldn’t be surprised if you never wanted to see me again.”

“If that’s all you’ve got, then your life is nothing compared to mine.” She grinned at me, but I saw a tinge of truth and sadness in her eyes. “But, just to clear things up: no, I do not want to not see you again. I’m actually glad that Zane and Lucky intervened.”

“So am I,” I laughed again. “Though do not tell them that. I don’t want them thinking that they can try to dictate my life, but they definitely helped me here. Especially after the other night.”

“What happened there?” She looked over at me curiously.

“I’m not sure.” I looked at her. “I got the feeling that we both weren’t ready to be in a certain place.”

“Yeah, perhaps.” She sat back and looked out the window. “I guess we’re both treading water here.”

“Would you like to go to a movie with me?” I blurted out before I could think about it too much. “I can also just take you home if you prefer.”

“What about your brother? Don’t you want to be with him?”

“I think he’d rather be with Lucky right now.” I smiled at her, happy to see that she was the kind of woman who thought about others before herself. “I’m sure we’ll be doing more talking tomorrow. Once he has time to get over the initial shock, I’m pretty sure he will have a lot more questions.”

“That was brave of you to tell him at the Johnsons’.” Her voice was light and non-judgmental, which I appreciated. “Weren’t you worried he would just lose it and go off on you?”

“Yes,” I laughed, “but Sidney is like my family. He’s known pretty much everything. He was the one who helped me find the private detective. He’s the one who has been badgering me to tell Zane. I know this sounds crazy, but I always knew I wanted Sidney to be around when I told Zane. He’s like my support system. Do I sound like a total weirdo to you right now?”

“No, of course not.” She reached over and squeezed my arm. “He seems really nice and so does his wife. Before you and Lucky arrived, I was talking to them and they really showed a genuine interest in me. It was like they knew exactly what to say to make me feel better about myself.”

“It’s a gift that they have.” I smiled at her warmly, glad that she had taken to them both. “It’s like they can see into your soul and the worries that you have, and they soothe you with their words and care.”

“Yes,” she nodded. “When Sidney spoke to me, I felt like he knew where I was coming from and what my dreams and obstacles were. It was funny.” Her voice grew low. “It’s hard to meet people who genuinely care about you like that. Who want to know your story, rather than just talk about themselves.”

“Yes, yes, it is.”

“So, you were in witness protection?” She changed the subject. “How did I not know that? That’s crazy.”

“I wasn’t technically in witness protection.” I laughed. “But yes, I was helping the FBI and the DEA with a case and I had to disappear.”

“Okay, I take back my earlier statement. Your life isn’t like Days of our Lives, it’s more like Mission Impossible.”

“Not really. All I had to do was go hide out in a small town in Florida. It was Zane who was actually getting to the bottom of the case.”

“That must have been hard, though, leaving your family.”

“It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do in my life.” I found myself driving back to Zane’s house instead of the movie. “The day I realized that I had to fake my own suicide and have my brother believe I was dead is still surreal to me.”

“What made you go along with it?”

“The agent who was in charge of the case told me that unless I complied, it was likely that they would come after me and my family, which, honestly, I doubted. But then he said, ‘Think of all the other innocent lives you could be saving. The lives that get caught in the crossfire. They were drug dealers, they didn’t care who they hurt.’ And that’s when I knew I had to do it. Special Agent Waldron had shown me photographs of many of the people that they believed were killed by the cartel and there were over twenty children. I didn’t want there to be any new faces added to that pile.”

“Wow.” Robin’s eyes widened. “You’re really selfless. Now you make me feel bad for going off on you two times.”

“I just did what anyone with a conscience would have done.” I shrugged. “And I’m pretty sure you will go off on me again, at some point. I can be infuriating, just ask Zane.” I laughed.

“Where are we going?” She looked out the window as she laughed.

“I figured we could watch a movie.” I paused. “But at home, if that’s not too presumptuous. You didn’t answer earlier and so I thought this may be nice. We can relax, have a few laughs and be comfortable.”

“Sounds good to me.” She gave me a wide smile. “Are you sure we won’t be bothering Zane and Lucky?”

“Well, here’s the other part.” I made a face at her. “I was hoping we could watch it in my room? I know what you’re thinking, but it’s not because I want to sleep with you. I have a king-sized bed so we won’t even have to touch. I just figured it will give us more privacy if they are already home, or if they come home while we are still watching it.”

“Don’t worry, Noah.” She giggled. “I understand.”

“Phew.” I pulled into the driveway. “I didn’t want you thinking this was another seduction move. And that all I wanted from you was a night of hot sex.”

“Don’t remind me of that last conversation.” She groaned. “I’m surprised you don’t think I’m bipolar.”

“You’re not?” I feigned surprise and she hit me in the shoulder before we both jumped out of the car.

“Funny.” She laughed. “Though I suppose I deserve that.”

“Let’s go inside.” I walked over to her side of the car and grabbed her hand. As we touched, I felt another spark jolt through me and I smiled to myself knowing that the connection I had witnessed previously was still there.

“So, are you going to tell me more about your time in Florida? Where did you go?” Robin looked up at me with a happy face, and I felt my heart start to pound. How could I tell her about everything that had happened in Palm Bonita? It was all so complicated and heartbreaking. I didn’t want to burden her with all that information. Not in the same day she had found out about all my family drama. It almost seemed too much. I didn’t want to lose her right when I was getting to know her because of an information overload. Not when I was finally getting a do-over with her. Plus, I didn’t know how to tell her about Skylar. I didn’t know if she would understand.

“There’s not really much to tell.” I said smoothly. “I stayed in a small town called Palm Bonita and basically just sat around and waited until I was able to come home.”

“Oh, that sucks.” She gave my upper arm a squeeze. “That must have been so boring. Did you make any friends?”

“Not really.” I shook my head. “I kept to myself most of the time.”

“Aww, that’s awful. What were the people like? Did they ask you where you came from?” Her eyes were excited. “I bet they were all curious as to who you were.”

“Not really.” Which was true. The people in Palm Bonita didn’t ask questions because they didn’t want anyone to ask them anything, either.

“So what did you do?” She looked confused. “Just sat and watched TV?”

“I did a lot of TV watching.” I nodded. “Not much else. I didn’t really have any friends, so I was by myself quite a bit.”

“So,” she paused. “No special lady friends?” Her eyes looked into mine questioningly, and my stomach churned.

“Not really.” I lied, feeling horrible as I did so. But I knew that Robin didn’t want to know about my relationship in Palm Bonita. She didn’t want to hear about all the places we had sex and how I lost myself in the relationship because I fell in love.

“Oh, wow.” She laughed. “Sorry for the twenty questions.”

“That’s okay. What about you? When did you last date?” I asked her, honestly wanting to know the answer but also wanting to take the focus of the conversation away from myself.