I could talk to Jemmy frankly. I said: “I am getting accustomed to it.”

He grimaced. “My poor little cousin. It was hard in the beginning, I know. You were so frightened. My heart bled for you.”

“Thank you, Jemmy. But it happens to many people. That was what they told me. I hated leaving everyone I loved.”

“And your husband?”

“I did not understand him at first.”

“And you do now?”

“He is a man whom it is not easy to understand.”

“I’d agree with that,” said Jemmy grimly.

“But I am not really unhappy now. I am alone often but I can read ... and think. I can fill my time.”

“It is a strange way to treat a Princess of Orange.”

I was silent for a while and then I said: “And you, Jemmy? It must be sad for you.”

“To be sent away from my country? Yes it is.”

“It is not the first time.”

He laughed. “I am in a delicate position, you might say. Mary, you do not believe I was involved in a plot to kill your father and mine?”

“If you tell me you were not, I will believe you.”

“I would never harm my father. You know I love him well.”

“As we all do.”

“It is difficult. The English ... you know ... they will never have a Catholic king on the throne.”

“If the rightful heir is a Catholic, they must.”

“One does not say ‘must’ to the people, and particularly the people of England.”

“Then what?”

He shrugged his shoulders and was silent.

“And Jemmy,” I said, “what of you?”

He said: “I am the King’s son. None can doubt. The King himself never has.”

“But your mother was not married to the King.”

“There are some who say there was a marriage.”

“That cannot be true, can it, Jemmy? The King has always denied it.”

Jemmy’s face hardened. “If there were proof,” he said.

“How could there be?”

His hand closed over mine. “In life, dear Mary, one should never shut one’s eyes to any possibility.”

“Jemmy, if it were so . . .”

“Ah,” said Jemmy, “if it were! Now I am going to show you another dance. This was very popular in Whitehall before I left.”

“Oh, Jemmy, how I wish all this trouble would be over. I hope the King goes on and on. Then it can stay as it is.”

“Yes,” said Jemmy. “Long life to him! But it has to come, you know.”

He stood up and held out his hands to me. I rose and he led me onto the floor, instructing me in the new dance from Whitehall.


* * *

THERE WAS TROUBLE WITH CHUDLEIGH, the English Envoy, with whom William had not been on very good terms since his arrival.

Because of William’s past friendship with Sidney and Russell, who had both been proved to be traitors, it was inevitable that Chudleigh should be highly suspicious of William, and as he was not the most tactful of men, he had made this clear.

He was shocked — and I supposed many people were amazed by this — that William should at this time pay such attention to the Duke of Monmouth. The King had been surprised and made his wry comments, but the extraordinary thing was that the Duke should have been made such an honored guest. Moreover, the Princess of Orange, who had previously spent much of her time in seclusion and was the daughter of one of the intended victims of the Rye House Plot, was giving him the most flattering attention.

I could understand how strange this must appear. I should have liked to have explained that it was my husband who had decreed, or more or less commanded, that I should help to entertain Monmouth and I was merely obeying him. I did not believe Monmouth had seriously meant to kill my father or uncle. He was reckless and could be caught up in people’s plots without having any real part in them. I was just excited to be with someone who made me feel merry and able to enjoy life.

There was much that would be difficult for people to understand; and I did not entirely understand it myself.

Eager to perform his new duties with efficiency, horrified that William should be honoring an exile from England, Chudleigh took action.

He gave instructions to the English soldiers under Dutch command that they were not to salute the Duke of Monmouth.

When William heard of this he was furious. He sent for Chudleigh. Several people heard what took place and it was talked of freely, so I was able to hear about it.

William demanded of Chudleigh how he could have the temerity to give orders to the Dutch army.

Sure of himself, Chudleigh retorted: “The Duke of Monmouth, Your Highness, is an exile from England on account of his complicity in a plot to take the lives of the King and the Duke of York. It is a matter of great astonishment to His Majesty’s Government, which I serve, that he should be so honored. I consider it my duty to prevent the Duke’s receiving the homage which appears to be given to him, for he is a traitor to my country, which is also his.”

William replied: “I would have you know that while you are in this country, you must obey its laws.”

“I must remind Your Highness,” retorted Chudleigh, “that I am not one of your subjects. I am here to serve my country and that is something I shall always do.”

William was carrying a cane, which he often did. I believed it was because he sometimes felt a weakness and a need to lean on something. He lifted his cane. It came within a few inches of Chudleigh’s face and it was clear that it was his intention to strike him. I imagined the awestruck silence and what the effect would have been if William had carried out such an action.

William apparently restrained himself in time, remembering the courtesy due to the Envoy of a friendly country.

Chudleigh said coolly: “If I have Your Highness’s permission to retire, I will do so.”

And the scene was over.

William must have been fuming with rage.

Chudleigh would certainly report what had happened and I knew that there would be surprise that I could be on such friendly terms with a man who had been sent into exile because he was suspected of being involved in a plot to murder my father.


* * *

THERE WAS A LETTER FROM MY FATHER. He was hurt and angered by the treatment of the Duke of Monmouth at the court of The Hague, and by the fact that I had not only partaken in it but with such enthusiasm. He was surprised that I could do so. The Duke of Monmouth was in exile, being suspected of planning to murder the King and himself. It seemed that the Prince of Orange, a kinsman of theirs, was acting as enemy rather than friend.

He went on to say that he knew I did not meddle in these affairs, but I should talk to the Prince and tell him what an effect this was having.

I smiled at this, imagining myself explaining to William. My father clearly did not understand the state of affairs here.

He went on: “Let the Prince flatter himself as he pleases, the Duke of Monmouth will do his best to have a push with him for the crown, if he, the Duke of Monmouth, outlives the King and me.”

I put down the letter. Did he really think that Monmouth or William would wait for his death? My poor, ineffectual father! How could he so deceive himself?

How little he knew of what was going on around me!


* * *

THE MERRY LIFE CONTINUED. There was a ball in honor of Monmouth. This was extraordinary, for William hated balls. To him they were foolish frivolity and a waste of time. But he appeared at this one — though he did not stay for long. He actually danced with me once — something I would have found hard to believe could ever happen.

I think he was anxious to show himself closely allied to the Protestant cause, and since Monmouth was an avowed one, he wanted everyone to know that he was anxious to see a Protestant ruler on the throne of England, and even if the people chose the bastard Monmouth, he would accept him because of his religion.

So, there was William dancing — a little inelegantly it was true — but still dancing!

As for myself, I wanted to dance all the time. It reminded me of home and what evenings used to be like there. It was no wonder that Monmouth’s stay in Holland was like a dream to me for ever after.

Of course, it was Jemmy who made it so. He was so full of energy and fun. We used to walk in the gardens together. William was aware of this and made no protest, although previously I had never been able to see people without his approval. It was such a change and I was like a bird which has been caged too long and has just regained its freedom.

We laughed a great deal. There was always laughter where Jemmy was. We talked of the past. We promised that there should be more such visits. We must repeat these happy days.

The weather grew very cold. We were, after all, in the midst of winter. There was ice on the ponds.

“We must skate,” said Monmouth.

I had never skated before, I told him.

“Then I shall have to teach you how to skate. It is too good an opportunity to miss. It is so cold that the ice will be really hard and you need have no fear, for my arms will be ready to catch you. You will be perfectly safe with me.”

What fun it was as we slid along, with the skates buckled to my shoes and my petticoats caught up at the knees.

“One foot, then the other,” chanted Jemmy. And we laughed and laughed. I lost my balance and was caught in Jemmy’s arms.

We were watched by the people who joined in our mirth. I think they were all pleased to see me enjoying life. It was long since I had been so carefree and happy; and I did not have to feel guilty, for I had William’s consent to abandon myself to the fun of the moment.

There was one unpleasant incident, however.

It was carnival time, I heard. I did not know there were such festivities in Holland. I supposed that it would have taken place and I heard nothing about it but for Jemmy’s presence.

I believe that on every lake and pond in Holland people in fancy dress and masked took their sledges onto the ice.

William had said that he and I must ride together. Jemmy was, of course, very much in evidence with us.

It was so unusual to see William taking part in such frivolity, but he drove the sledge and with me beside him we skirted over the ice.

The pond was fairly crowded and as we swept along, right in our path, a sledge was coming toward us. In this, masked but obviously himself, was the Envoy Chudleigh. He came along directly before us and, as he must have been aware of our identity, we expected him to draw to one side to allow us to pass. Chudleigh, however, did no such thing, and we were obliged to draw to one side to let him go by.

I saw William’s lips tighten, and I heard him whisper under his breath: “I shall endure no more of this insolence. I shall have him recalled.”

His anger had not abated when we returned and he immediately sent a letter to England and asked that Chudleigh should return to England.

Chudleigh was not a man meekly to take blame for what he considered to have been correct behavior. He wrote to England. I heard afterward that he had explained how he had acted as only a man of breeding could act on such an occasion. He had had the right of way and, presuming the Prince and Princess of Orange did not wish to be recognized, as they were masked, he had not done so. He added that, at the court of The Hague, special privileges were given to those English who were ready to work against their own country and continual complaints were made against those who were loyal to it.

In spite of his protests, Chudleigh was recalled to London and soon after that Bevil Skelton came out as an envoy. I think that, in due course, William certainly wished the change had not taken place and it would have been more convenient for him had he retained Chudleigh.


* * *

I SHALL NEVER FORGET that February day when the news came to The Hague. Jemmy and I, enjoying the days, had no idea that it was all going to end so soon and in such a way.

I had so enjoyed this pleasant interlude and had refused to remind myself that it could not go on forever; but I had not expected there would be such an abrupt ending.

There came a message from William. I was to go to him at once for he had news which he wished to impart. In accordance with my usual custom, I obeyed immediately, and as soon as I stood before him I knew by the pulse I saw beating in his forehead and his suppressed excitement that the news for which he had been waiting had come at last.